"Qi Mu, I want to eat rock sugar gourd••••••"

"Qi Mu, I want to eat marshmallows•••••••"

"Qi Mu, I want to eat ice cream•••••••

It's only been an hour's work, and all the RMB I have worked so hard to accumulate has been squeezed dry by her.

The large backpack she was carrying contained valuable clothes she had bought at the children's store.

The suitcase in my hand was filled with all sorts of shoes, each of which was worth a month's worth of food.

But she was not satisfied.

If you meet someone you like, I want to.

When I come across something good-looking, I want it.

Encounter the bizarre, I want.

"Qi Mu, I want to eat popcorn."

There was only a bucket of popcorn left on the counter.

The waiter looked at me and a middle-aged man in a suit and tie with a big belly.

We opened our mouths at the same time, and we paid at the same time.

Behind the middle-aged man was a young girl dressed in scantily clad clothes.

"Husband, I want to eat popcorn."

The middle-aged man immediately exchanged the five yuan in his hand for a red banknote, slammed it on the counter, and said, "No need to look for it." ”

Little Lori Meng Po quit.

"Qi Mu, take the money, give five hundred, I must eat this bucket of popcorn."

She licked the marshmallow in her left hand and took a bite of the ice cream in her right hand, without backing down.

I'm going to crash.

Oh, my God.

A bucket of popcorn that costs less than two dollars is actually asking me to buy it for 500 yuan.

Really, I'm Wanda's brother Cong?

At the moment I only have a tight fifty dollar left in my pocket.

Where are you going to change five hundred?

In the end, I had to say to her in a negotiating tone: "Well, let's go somewhere else to buy it, I know that one is better than this one." ”

"I don't, I don't, I'm going to eat this bucket."

"But I don't have five hundred dollars."

"I don't care, I'm going to eat, I'm going to eat•••••• if I can't eat it, you just wait for bad luck."

I looked at the middle-aged man helplessly and begged, "Big brother, look, can you give me this bucket, and I'll go somewhere else to buy two buckets for you later, how about it?" ”

Before the middle-aged man could speak, the girl behind him spoke, disdainfully: "No way, whoever has the highest price will get it first•••••• and there is no money to pretend to be a big-tailed wolf?" ”

As he spoke, he picked up the popcorn from the counter.

Suddenly, I felt the temperature around me drop rapidly.

Little Lori was angry, very angry, and the consequences were serious.

Fortunately, there was no thunderstorm.

Staring at the girl's belly under the cheongsam, he said, "You have it, it's still a boy." ”

The woman was startled, obviously taken aback.

The middle-aged man's face changed suddenly, and he was ecstatic, and asked the woman, "Really?" Is this true? I'm finally going to be a dad, I'm still a boy, and I'm going to have a baby. ”

Judging by the situation, eighty percent of this man wants to be a father and wants to go crazy.

The woman gave little Lori Meng Po a white glance angrily, meaning to blame her for being troublesome.

After hesitating for a while, seeing that the man was enthusiastic, he finally took out a test sheet and handed it to him.

Explained: "I was going to tell you about it in the evening. ”

The middle-aged man hurriedly took it and laughed after reading it.

picked up the woman and kissed her wildly.

"Oops, I love you to death, my little darling."

"It's a pity—"

Little Lori Meng Po said suddenly, and stretched her voice very long.

"It's not yours."

The scene suddenly became awkward.

The middle-aged man was furious, let go of his woman, and reached out to hit her.

How can I be indifferent?

Dodged in the middle, and said with a smile: "Big brother has something to say, I, the queen of my family is still young, don't take it to heart." ”

The middle-aged man snorted coldly, looked her up and down a few times, and then put down his palm and said sharply: "Your Excellency? I think it's a little kid. ”

Little Lori Meng Po sneered: "Is it yours, let your woman say it herself•••••• you say, hurry up and tell him, is the child his?" ”

The woman's face turned pale instantly, without a trace of blood, and she looked at Little Lori with eyes that almost wanted to kill.

Not good.

It was said to be right.

The middle-aged man was stunned for a moment, saw the girl's expression was strange, and his eyes gradually changed, and he said in a deep voice: "You, her, what did she mean?" Isn't the child mine? ”

The woman was a little panicked, handed me the popcorn in her hand, took the middle-aged man's hand, and said, "Husband, let's go, don't listen to this child's nonsense." ”

The middle-aged man didn't move, clenched his fists.

Little Lori Meng Po looked at me and said with a smile: "Qi Mu, ask you a question." ”

Yes?

I was stunned for a moment.

"You say••••••• I'll listen to you."

She cleared her throat and said, "If a man marries three wives and sleeps with five women, and none of them can have children, why do you say?" ”

"This," I whispered, "probably infertility." ”

The middle-aged man's body shook suddenly, looked at Xiao Lori and said, "How do you know that I married three wives and slept with five women, and none of them were pregnant?" How do you know this? Are you •••••• human or ghost? ”

Little Lori sighed like a little adult, and said: "It doesn't matter what I am, the key is that you weren't a human when you were alive, and you couldn't even be a ghost after you died•••••• Qi Mu, what do you call this kind of man whose wife is pregnant with someone else's child?" ”

"Turtle."

I'm an honest person.

Always tell the truth.

Especially in front of the Queen.

Little Lori glared at me dissatisfied, and said dissatisfiedly: "Wang Ba is Wang Ba, and it is still a turtle, why are you so literate?" Throw the popcorn in your hand, I'm not in the mood to eat it now, it's disgusting, let's go. ”

With that, he swaggered away.

I looked at the middle-aged man who was still shivering, and the bloodless woman, and put the bucket of popcorn on the counter again.

Hurriedly turned around and left this place of right and wrong.

Within two steps, the sound of a slap in the face and the screams of a woman mixed together, filling my eardrums.

"Qi Mu, are you out of money?"

I nodded honestly in response to her inquiry.

Although I feel ashamed.

"Then you can swipe your credit card, or sell your house, anyway, after twelve o'clock in the evening, you will die, haven't you heard such a saying? The most tragic thing in the world is that people die and the money is not spent. ”

I rub.

Is this really going to kill me?

Is there really no room for negotiation at all?

I've been begging to behave well, hoping that she'll raise her hand and let me go.

Suddenly, there was a big surprise, such as raising my merit to 10,000.

Now it seems all delusional.

But.

As long as the clock doesn't ring at twelve o'clock in the middle of the night, I still have a chance before then.

So he smiled: "Isn't there a saying that the most tragic thing in the world is that people live and money is gone." ”

Little Lori Meng Po looked at me with deep meaning, and said in a deep voice: "You really don't want to die? ”

"Uh-huh••••••"

No one wants to die.

I'm human too.

Xiao Lori said: "It seems that the master and apprentice who made up these two jokes, right?" When I first listened to the ghosts of the underworld, I thought these two sentences were quite philosophical, so I wanted to arrest them all, and said them in my ear a hundred times a day, and later found that they didn't seem to be popular•••••• forget it, and when they became popular again, I would definitely invite them to Huangquan as a guest and tell me a joke, what do you think? ”

My mind raced and I wondered if I should leave a word on the meager relationship of these two sketch masters, and tell them not to be popular again, and to be careful of death—after all, they used to bring me a lot of joy.

"Ahhh

With such a mistake, she went crazy again.

And the gesture is going to pounce.

I was so shocked that goosebumps came out, and I said, "Here? Not okay? It's a downtown area. ”

Can you give me some face before you die?

I don't want to be scolded by 10,000 people after I die, labeled as shameless and hooligan.

She stopped, looked around, and said, "Well, there seem to be a lot of people here." ”

Boss, this is the most prosperous downtown area in the city, of course there are more people, and there are more cameras.

She pondered for a moment and said, "Qi Mu, why don't we open the room?" How about going to a five-star hotel and opening a presidential suite? ”

"Don't you know this? I don't know how many people have covered the quilts in the hotel, some only change one quilt cover, and there are pinhole cameras installed in it•••••• by the way, how hot Master Chen's nude photos door is, don't you know in the underworld? Could it be that you also want to be like him and become popular all over the world? •••••• there is something that has been holding in my heart for a long time, are those two children Master Chen's? The all-knowing, all-knowing queen should know all about it, right? ”

Dissect the pros and cons and change the subject.

I didn't expect it to be successful.

Little Lori smiled and said: "Of course I know, I personally sent those two yin spirits to reincarnation, so- okay, Qi Mu, if you don't have money to open a house, you can honestly explain, why do you go around so many bends?" The intentions are sinister, and when I get to the underworld, I will find someone to teach you a good lesson, go back to Pengmen, and drive away all your artists, and they will listen to the root of the wall. ”

Oh my God, it's going to come for real?

"Yes, Queen."

"I'll go up and down, don't scream."

"•••••• yes."