September 16, 2012

When I got home, I closed the door and sat down on the floor, my shoes not off, just sitting against the door.

Zhang Hengli said, I went to Germany for less than two months and had a new girlfriend, and now they are all talking about marriage. Zhang Hengli and several of Yi Xu's classmates are still playing games together, and what they heard from those people is true and accurate. He asked me to accept the facts, forget about Yi Xu early, he has another girl by his side, instead of me, fall in love with him, talk about marriage with him, and grow old with him.

How is that possible? How could Yi Xu be such a person? How could he have done such a thing to me?

I kept dialing his phone and got the sound of "the person you are calling has been turned off". I buried my head deep in my knees and banged the back of my head with remorse. Cinderella's bell rang at 12 o'clock, and the happiness of the past was instantly erased.

There was a knock on my door, and my legs were too weak to stand up, so I had to open the door on my knees. Zhang Hengli and one of his suitcases and a backpack were outside. He squatted down and said, "I'll stay with you." ”

He sent me home and went back to his house to pack my bags. He was worried that I wouldn't be able to carry it, so he came to see me.

I didn't fall asleep until dawn, and it seemed that I had a dream, and the dream was white, clear and blurry, and the steps of change were very slow and slow, and after a few reincarnations, it was like smoke drifting over, and it was gradually enveloped, and then the smoke slowly and slowly dispersed.

Before he really walked into the dream, he was woken up by Zhang Hengli and looked at the time, eight o'clock in the morning. I slept for about two hours.

Zhang Hengli had already prepared breakfast. He was a master cook, and when he was in his second year of junior high school, his mother suddenly began to believe in Buddhism, did not kill, and became a vegetarian. Zhang Hengli saw that his mother was getting thinner and thinner because he couldn't eat vegetarian dishes, he bought a book during the winter vacation, found a video on the Internet, learned vegetarian cooking very seriously, and taught his mother this skill after getting his mother's approval. He can make the tofu skin into a beef flavor and the tofu into a shrimp flavor.

In this regard, he is perfect and easy to continue. Yi Xu has no requirements for food at all, no taste. We once had dinner at Zhang Yi's house, Yi Xu took the initiative to ask Ying to cook, and the food was returned to the pot by Zhang Yi and Zhang Hengli for first aid, saying that those things were not eaten by birds and beasts. Yi Xu said that he suddenly understood one thing, he had a cat and a dog, and they all ran away from home, and it turned out that this was the reason.

"Xijia, are you done washing? Hurry up, what I made today is delicious! Zhang Hengli greeted me.

I was so sleepy that I couldn't keep my eyes open, and I slammed myself on the table.

"Xijia, I'll get you some eggs, I fried them in sesame oil, fragrant, and it's mainly good for your health. When you're in a bad mood, this is the best way to eat! Sesame oil fried eggs are easy to breathe, and you will be happy after eating! ”

"Yes." I sighed in response.

"Also, the noodles I sent early in the morning and the fritters I made were not bought out to buy, they were fried by my own hands, and they were definitely not gutter oil!"

"Okay." When I looked up, I could still hear the pan in the kitchen hissing and the smell of eggs in front of me.

Because he first learned to cook in order to be filial to his mother, Zhang Hengli has a special complex for the dishes he makes.

But I had no appetite and I had lost interest in food.

"You're not in good spirits, I'm afraid you don't have an appetite, you see, I found out all the spicy radishes pickled by your mother, you see that I'm delicate, right?" He said, holding up a vegetable bowl.

I cooperatively agreed, "Yes." ”

"You eat!"

I listlessly said, "Oh. ”

"Sorry!" He suddenly raised his voice: "Are you polite?" Can you open your eyes and talk to me?

"I know with my eyes closed that you are one meter eight tall, weigh one hundred and eighteen, have an IQ of eighteen, and have a long life to beat Wang Ba......"

When I woke up, it was three o'clock in the afternoon. I fell asleep on the dining table like that.

The bed has a role, and the sleep out of the bed creates a pain all over the body. Feelings also have a role, if the person you love suddenly leaves you, it will really leave 10,000 tons of pain.

Can Yi Xu be so cruel?

I took a quick shower, washed my clothes, hung them on the balcony, and brought an electric fan to blow on. I wiped the thin gold belt and red sandals as well. Wait for the clothes to dry and get ready to go out.

"Want to chew rice?" Zhang Hengli flashed out of the guest room.

"I don't want to." My throat hadn't opened yet, and my voice was very nasal.

"That mouth under the nose is useless, isn't it?"

I glared at him, "Aren't I talking to you?" ”

He angrily pulled my arm down: "Isn't there any other use?" Eat something, do you want to starve to death? ”

I shook his hand away and said, "The most important use is to nibble and continue." ”

"Female rascal!" Zhang Hengli followed me and shouted, "Where are you going?" “

"Go to Yi Xu's house." I say.

"Why are you more shameless than me? When have you ever seen me dumped and turned back? A little self-esteem is okay? ”

I put on a shoe: "I'm dumped for the first time, I can't accept it, can I compare with you?" You've been through a lot of battles! Besides, you don't remember what it was like to fall out of love for the first time! ”

"What am I like? It's time to eat, it's time to drink, it's time to play! ”

"I believe in glutinous rice balls!"

I haven't witnessed Zhang Hengli's first fall out of love. When the two of us met, it was already the third year of junior high school, according to the standard of his early love, the love of the third year of junior high school can be regarded as late love, and the love of my freshman year is called twilight love. He was very arrogant early, in the sixth grade of elementary school.

What am I doing in the sixth grade? Climb trees! After my family moved to Changsha, I spent a very lonely childhood. I am a country girl to the children of Changsha, with bad grades, mediocre appearance, not attractive to boys, and I don't even speak Changsha-style Mandarin. I can't wait to catch mud every day when girls play with celebrity stickers, I always walk in the sun, I get a tan, I like to climb on the courtyard wall and look into the distance, and girls think I'm weird. I don't have any friends, and even if I had two classmates who had been mistaken for friends, I wouldn't keep in touch with them when they left school. My parents were busy with work, and I was even more lonely. I name every piece of furniture in the house, my bed is called Yezi, the refrigerator at home is called Bingbing, the sofa is called Chubby, the TV is called Green Photon, and the name of a child is just like that. I imagined them to be my best friends, playing games, playing hide and seek, and whispering to them. In the second semester of the fourth grade of elementary school, I was so lonely that I held the ice and said to the sun, "This is what I took out of Bingbing's stomach, if you talk to me, I will give it to you!"

Wow, I can't think about it, what a brain-dead!

By the fifth grade, my taste improved, my requirements improved, the family was chubby or something, and the things that couldn't move could no longer satisfy me, so I began to climb the fence of our yard and sit and watch the crowds flowing on the street, although the dust on the street, the bustling crowds, the cars spraying exhaust fumes, the traffic lights that prevented people from walking, and the flowers and plants on the roadside buckles all made me miss my hometown - flowers all over the sky, there are roads everywhere between heaven and earth, I have friends when I want to be lively, and I can catch a butterfly when I don't have friends and play for an afternoon. Spring, summer, autumn and winter, the air is sweet...... But I'm still optimistic, I look at all the pictures I can see sitting on the wall as cartoons, other people watch cartoons hurt their eyes, I watch cartoons hurt my lungs. One day, thieves entered the courtyard and stole the gold and silver jewelry of three families, and the top of the courtyard wall was re-cemented by the adults and inlaid with sharp pieces of glass. I had to change the location of the battle, and climbing the wall became climbing the tree. Other people's parents walked the streets and alleys into the game hall to catch the children, and my mother pulled the tree to find me.

So what I did the most in sixth grade was to get my mother to reprimand: "If you want to study, you can climb trees!" ”

Zhang Hengli fell in love in the same year! It's still their class's class flowers.

The boys in elementary school are very rude to the expression of their love, and more than half of the boys in their class like that class of flowers, so the class flower is cried every day, because the boys' choice of expression is to pull her braids, so how can the little girl know that hurt is love! One day, Zhang Hengli also wanted to pull it, when Ban Hua was wiping the blackboard, and turned around to see Zhang Hengli standing in front of the lectern and looking at her in a daze. He slowly raised his arm, and Ban Hua instinctively leaned on the blackboard, she knew that Zhang Hengli was going to do bad things like other male classmates! I saw Zhang Hengli's hand raised higher and higher, and then his fingers were inserted into his hair, and with a bang, Ban Hua was stunned, and Zhang Hengli pulled himself so that tears were about to come out. Later, Ban Hua remembered this boy who didn't talk about her, only herself, and in the summer vacation after graduating from elementary school, she took the initiative to ask Zhang Hengli to go out to play and let him be her boyfriend. Zhang Hengli happily agreed, but he didn't think that he didn't even hold his hand, and he was dumped the next day, because the girl asked Zhang Hengli, why did he grab his hair, is it because of kindness? Zhang Hengli didn't even have the courage to lie, and said, because he didn't dare. It was Zhang Hengli's first love, which lasted less than 20 hours. It was from then on that Zhang Hengli began a life of constantly having girlfriends and being dumped.

Tang Yuan said that Zhang Hengli cried to death, and ran to the school's playground to roll around, but fortunately, the school was on vacation, and there were few people on the whole campus. A few boys who had a good time arrived when they heard the news, and everyone took out all the money they had on them and collectively bought him a toy car that he had loved for a long time, so that he could calm down.

Of course, Zhang Hengli didn't admit it, saying that he was young and didn't know what sadness was at all, and he took the toy car because a few boys had bet before, and whoever chased Banhua would win, it was not a condolence, it was a prize.

I used to think that Zhang Hengli's statement was more reliable, not that he was not emotional, but that the matter of "rolling" was not very reliable, he loved to be clean, I and Yi Xu could sit down anywhere, he couldn't, as long as it wasn't on the sofa on the chair, he had to put a piece of paper. He said that his mother was uncomfortable seeing dirty clothes, which was a habit he had developed since childhood.

Now I choose to believe in glutinous rice balls. I can't wait for Zhang Hengli to collapse their school playground back then. In this way, if I have a little pain now, he can say less nonsense because of the same experience.

Zhang Hengli grabbed my other shoe: "You must go?" ”

"Can you still tie me up?"

"If you insist, I'll ......"

"Just what?"

"I'll go with you!" He said mischievously.

I laughed, grabbed my shoes, and put them on.

"No!" I say.

His leisurely expression froze there: "I have nothing to do!" It's boring! Your family is so big, there is no one, it scares people to death! ”

Our house is as big as theirs! They are all three bedrooms and two living rooms, and they are 100 square meters.

"Then you don't have to come with me, do you? Go anywhere, Changsha is your territory, just go out and find a woman and be dumped again! I said as I walked out the door.

He quickly put on his heels, and the figures of the two of us were printed on the shiny elevator doors.

"Would you like to save some self-esteem? Yi Xu went on his honeymoon with his girlfriend in advance, the tree wants the skin and the face of the people, and you are still looking for the past with a dead face, how do others look down on you? You also know that I am experienced in the field of being broken up, you listen to me now, the breakup is not scary, it is really scary not to be able to walk forward after the breakup. If you still have a little luck, if you don't believe me, you can ask Zhong Pei, Zhong Pei is Yi Xu's best friend, listen to what he says. He said softly, his gaze drifting for a moment, and when he said the last sentence, it seemed as if he were talking to himself.

I frowned and stared at him, "When will Yi Xu come back?" ”

"How do you know this? No matter when he comes back, you have to get better quickly, it's best to find a new boyfriend quickly, and also talk about marriage, get married before them, and can't fight for breath without steaming steamed buns? ”

It's only been five days, we were fine a few days ago, I thought we were sweet, just quietly, turned upside down?

He said in an almost pleading tone: "Yes, come, go home and rest, I'll cook for you, aren't you hungry?" ”

"Didn't you say ask Zhong Pei? Let's go, go ask Zhong Pei. ”

Zhong Pei's house is also three bedrooms and two living rooms, with a hundred square meters. I suddenly deserted, Zhang Yi's family, Yi Xu's family, it's all like this! Is "three bedrooms and two living rooms, 100 square meters" the standard of commercial housing in Changsha? Or is it a sign of the city's family finances moving towards stability?

"Just give him a call." Zhang Hengli said.

"I did, but he didn't answer. The text message was not returned. ”

"And what do you want?"

"I've been to his house, have you forgotten?"

"Really? You seem to have been there, the time when his first love died? Where do you remember? ”

"Of course! How could I not remember? Yi Xu and I announced that we were together at the station near his house! “

The roads, the lights, our conversations, every detail of that night, I never forget!

Suddenly I felt very cold, so many things are vivid, but now the end of the world is close at hand!

Zhang Hengli was also distracted, immersed in his own world, his expression was bitter for a while, sad for a while, nervous for a while, and relaxed for a while. Probably thinking about his game.

"But what if he's not home?" He finally came to his senses and asked.

I walked into the elevator: "Then I'll go back tomorrow." Tomorrow is not my day after tomorrow. He had to go home. ”

Zhang Hengli held his head and followed up: "Oh, my head hurts!" ”

When we walked out of the community, the trees that could not be seen outside the courtyard wall two years ago were higher than the outer wall, like a giraffe sticking out its neck, and beyond the eaves of the wall to yearn for the outside world.

I didn't recognize Zhong Pei at first sight, he started a business when we were still students, and he used to play football with Yi Xu and them as students, but now I can see the boss's style. He's also a little fatter, he's got crow's feet at the corners of his eyes, he's got less hair than before, and he's holding a briefcase in the summer, with a straight white shirt and black trousers, not like someone the same age as us.

Maybe Zhang Hengli won't feel this way, he has been in the office building for two years. There should be such a young and mature image and dress around.

As soon as we walked into his neighborhood, we bumped into him. He was not surprised to see us, as if he knew we were coming. But his eyes are a little timid, as if he is secretly looking around.

"Oops, I'm too busy, I think I have time to reply to your calls and texts, but it's true that I don't have time to sleep, look at my dark circles, can you see it, it's all up to the jaw!" Zhong Pei twisted his body very awkwardly and said.

"Zhong Pei, I'...... I don't delay your time, I just want to ask you, where did Yi Xu go, did he change his mobile phone number, I can't find him. “

Zhong Pei looked at Zhang Hengli behind me and said, "You didn't tell her?" “

Zhang Hengli's voice came from the back of my head: "I said everything I knew, she didn't believe it, so she had to come to you for verification." “

Zhong Pei shook his body and said, "I don't know much, just two!" But neither of these things is very good, would you still like to hear it? ”

I turned around and found that Zhang Hengli was staring at me intently, with a particularly serious expression, and my heart was beating faster and faster. I grabbed my left wrist with my right hand, giving myself strength and hoping to control myself.

"I'd like to hear it." I say.

"The first thing is that he is going to marry someone else, and he has already immigrated, they have already gone abroad, and of course the mobile phone number can no longer be used."

"How is that possible?"

"How could it not be? The steamed buns that have been eaten are not fragrant. ”

He just said that I was abandoned, and he said that I was a bun. Damn, can't you say it's a bun? At least with stuffing!

"The second one, it's even more cruel, in the three and a half years that you have been with Yi Xu, he has been splitting his legs, all of them are from your school, the specific number is not clear, and there are at least four of them. He didn't have a girlfriend when you left, he always had other girlfriends. ”

"So arrogant? How could I not know? I've been with Yi Xu for so long, and we meet or contact each other almost every day! How is this possible? ”

I don't believe it at all, how dare I believe it? When you turn around, the sea is empty?

"No matter how arrogant you are, I don't dare to let you know. Do you remember, when you were a sophomore, the girl in N University fell out of love and jumped off the building? So we don't dare to reveal the news, in case you can't think about it like that girl, it's human life! Zhong Pei said.

I remember that the jumping incident once caused almost a sensation in all major colleges and universities in Changsha. A school-level girl, she has been a graphic model since she was ten years old, and almost all the photo studios in Changsha have her art model photos, and she is almost the most valuable student model in Changsha after going to college, not only beautiful but also a professional ballet dancer, with a good reputation. She had a mediocre-looking boyfriend in her sophomore year, and everyone thought that the boy had made a lot of money, fortunately with a goddess-like girlfriend, half of the boys in the college were envious, jealous and hateful when they mentioned her boyfriend. But the boy is a flower seed, and he splits three girls at the same time, which is known, and the unknown does not know if there is one. The beauty was extremely sad, during the eleventh holiday of that year, after the students left the school one after another to go home, and the dormitory was almost empty, she jumped from the roof of the seventh floor to the lawn downstairs in the middle of the night. Someone heard the voice, thinking that it was a high-rise whose schoolbag or other items accidentally fell from the balcony, and the security guard in the distance saw a piece of white in the deep darkness, and thought that a classmate threw a sheet downstairs, and there were classmates below. It wasn't until the next morning that the body was found by the cleaners.

I still remember that Yi Xu told Zhong Pei about this, and Yi Xu asked a few classmates to play football with Zhong Pei, and I also went to dinner. Zhong Pei also said at the time that women are more fragile than men! What he meant was that he didn't even think about killing himself when his girlfriend died, and that girl couldn't think about it just because she was hacked!

I'm not supposed to be as fragile as that girl, but Yi Xu will be worse than that scumbag?

"Do you have his contact information abroad? Which city in which country? I asked.

"I can't help this, to be honest, I haven't seen him a few times in the past two years, and I haven't been notified of the news that he is going to get married. It's all out of society, and the relationship between classmates is a little lighter, although it's cruel, but we have to accept it, right? “

"Isn't that right?" I said, "He asked you to play last month!" Just the last weekend of last month, don't you remember? ”

Zhong Pei raised his eyebrows: "Do you understand how to hide people's eyes and ears?" How many cheaters don't mean being with a male friend? No matter how good the trick gets, it's fake! ”

"His four girlfriends, did they listen to others?"

He pointed to his eyes, and in a posture of wanting to insert his own eyes, he said fiercely: "I saw it with my own eyes! ”

Zhong Pei's eyes changed, and he couldn't tell whether it was mysterious or empty. Or maybe his eyes haven't changed, it's because I'm in a bad mood.

"You swear?" I don't give up.

He raised his right hand: "I swear!" ”

It was as if someone had punched me in the face, and I endured the solid pain and continued to ask, "What did you see with your own eyes?" ”

"Holding hands, hugging, kissing, opening the room! Let me tell you, there are no secrets between men, how can I say that he is my best buddy, do you know what he thinks of you? People don't want to see you anymore! Think about it, he has passed through so many women, and finally found someone who wants to stay with him for a lifetime, and is still willing to entangle with you, the former ex-ex-ex-girlfriend? If you don't know it, you have to add a few 'before' words! Besides, it's thousands of miles apart, and there's really no point in contacting again, what do you say? “

Disappointment came like dust.

"Well, thank you." I muttered and began to cry, the salty taste running to the corners of my mouth.

"Ye Xijia!" Zhong Pei called me behind my back, "Although we have known each other once, it's best that you don't look for me again in the future, first, I'm busy, and second, I have to respect Yi Xu, don't you?" “

"Okay." I turned around and said, it seemed that I was back in the end of the first year of college, so cheekily looking for Yi Xu through Zhong Pei, but it turned out to be sad and hurt my self-esteem.

"Zhong Pei, let me ask you one last time, you just said that Yi Xu had a few girlfriends when he was in college, do you know it clearly?"

"Four."

"Four?" I almost laughed out loud as I said, "I fell in love once and was broken up four times?" Catch up with Zhang Hengli and talk about falling in love four times? ”

Zhang Hengli was stabbed by my secret arrow, and immediately regained his composure and enlightened me: "Cars have lanes, horses have roads, accept the reality!" ”

Zhong Pei's figure blurred in my eyes, he is also someone I have known for five or six years, should I believe his words?

I took out my phone in a panic and tried to log in to Yixu's QQ, WeChat, email, and Skype, but all of them showed the wrong password.

My doubts are as swaggering as my pain.

Could it be that life is a circle, and everything will return to the starting point? It was Zhang Hengli and Zhong Pei who helped me find Yi Xu at the beginning, and today the two of them will announce our parting?