When Su Nan returned home, it was already around 20:30, and while she took off her shoes and socks, she said, "Mom, I'm starving to death." Xu Saihua, who was sitting on the sofa watching TV, quickly suspended the TV series as if he had received an order from his superiors, and quickly went to the kitchen to bring out a bowl of hot chicken soup and said, "Moisten the intestines first." ”

Xu Saihua, who put down the chicken soup, put on an apron and went into the kitchen, Su Nan looked at his mother's back and felt so warm, although this home is only more than 50 square meters, although the sparrows are small, they have all kinds of organs.

"My family is small and cramped. Su Nan looked extremely embarrassed and said.

"Although the sparrows here are small, they have all the organs" Xu Qian curled up in the quilt, stretched out a head and continued: "Xiao Nan, I think you are very happy, Auntie loves you so much, and your home has a warm smell." ”

"Eh, Xiao Nan, why are you in a daze? Why don't you move your chopsticks after calling you for a long time?" Xu Saihua pointed to the chopsticks in front of Su Nan and the hot meal that had been prepared.

Su Nan, who was distracted, came back to his senses, looked at his loving mother and said, "Thank you, Mom." ”

"Thank you, thank you, eat first, it's going to be cold later. The mother moved the chair, sat opposite Su Nan, raised a pair of chopsticks, and kept picking up vegetables for Su Nan.

As if remembering something, Su Nan stood up in a lost soul, ran behind the door, opened his backpack, and took out the envelope.

"Let's eat first, it's almost 21 o'clock. Xu Saihua snatched the white envelope from Su Nan's hand, and a small key suddenly slipped out of the white envelope, and the key fell on the table with a clang, Xu Saihua was stunned.

"Mom, give me the letter. Su Nan said anxiously.

Xu Saihua glanced at Su Nan and said, "I'll see it after eating." ”

"Mom, that's the letter Qianqian left me. Su Nan leaned over and stretched out his hand to pull back the white envelope in front of Xu Saihua, Su Nan opened the letter, and the beginning of the letter read:

Xiao Nan:

Xiao Nan, when you open this letter, please don't cry, there is a banquet in the world, I just went on a trip to a distant place. Before leaving, I was a little relieved of you, and I felt very guilty about you all these years. Sister, I wanted you to be happy, but I didn't expect me to become a stalk in the relationship between you and Lin Yuefeng, I feel particularly guilty. I know that even if I say countless sorry to you, it will not be enough to make up for your lost youth, sorry, I still want to say this word to you.

I confess that my soul is lonely, lonely, so lonely that I want to grasp at a straw, and as long as someone promises me that he can give me a home, a complete home, I will go with him with all my heart. When I first met Lin Yuefeng, he said that he wanted to protect me for the rest of my life, and wanted to give me a home-like harbor, so that I could have a place to dock when I was tired. I've been moved, but I don't dare to be confused, what I want is not just sweet love, what I need is marriage, a home that has been emotionally built. As students, we talked about marriage earlier, and I chose to escape from his kindness, and I escaped for three years.

In the past three years, I have seen your love for him in your eyes, and I have tried to help you connect with you, but it backfired, and I became a boring guy. At the same time, the failure of the matchmaking caused embarrassment for both of you, and since then you have always looked for excuses to leave when you see each other, and I feel that I am guilty of the worst. During this period, I fell in love with someone, he didn't need any commitment and words, he didn't need to promise me a home or how good he was to me, just his eyes and a back and the faint taste he exuded made me feel extra warm, he was Lin Muqi. When I first met him, I was in the reading hall, and he walked past me, and I smelled a faint smell, and the smell was very familiar, familiar, familiar with the smell that I had been exposed to twenty years ago.

Twenty years ago, when I lost my sight for more than three months, I felt that my world was about to be accompanied by darkness, and my mother gave up on treating me early, and I couldn't go to school, and I often sobbed at home alone. My mother seldom comforted me, maybe I was a broom star for her, my father died the year after I was born, and the burden of the family was all on her own, and she was often busy from morning to night in order to make a living. Even if I learned to do laundry and cooking and other household chores at a very young age, I couldn't get her to look at me or smile at me, and sometimes she came back from being angry at work, and often she would vent her anger on me, and I was used to this kind of life.

Twenty years ago, my eyes slowly blurred to the point of complete blindness, and the colorful world fell into complete darkness for only half a year, during which time I rubbed my eyes and told my mother that her eyes were uncomfortable, and she never cared. During the three months of blindness, she often abused me, I couldn't do anything, and sometimes I would get bumped when I got out of bed and walked in the room, and I was afraid to get out of bed. Hiding on the bed alone, staying for a day, in the morning she will put breakfast next to my bed, I slowly reached out and groped to find the steamed buns to nibble, I never dared to eat more, this is my day's food, sometimes she came back late, I didn't even eat dinner. I didn't dare to say it when I was hungry, I didn't dare to say it when I was thirsty, I lived very timidly and cautiously, until one day an uncle who claimed to be a doctor came to my bedside and asked me, "Do you want to see the sun again?" I nodded vigorously, and my mother's cruelty resounded throughout the room: "Doctor, I don't have any money, if you really want to treat her, take her away." ”

Uncle Doctor stroked my head and asked, "Do you want to come with me?"

I smelled the faint fragrance of his body, and felt a special peace of mind, as if the light was right in front of me. I left my mother with my uncle, a doctor, and he soon arranged for me to have surgery, and he often came to visit me at my bedside during the recovery from the operation, telling me interesting stories. On the day I took off the gauze from my eyes, I was looking forward to seeing my uncle, but he never showed up, and it was a female doctor who removed the gauze for me, and I pestered this female doctor every day to ask what the name of the doctor who operated on me was, and she only told me that his name was Dr. Lin. One afternoon, after a period of observation, a friend who claimed to be Dr. Lim's uncle took me to Dr. Lim's house, where a nanny aunt took care of my meals and school pick-up.

I can get a few phone calls from Uncle Lin in a year, but I never see his people. On the phone, he always cared about my life, study, etc., and he was like a father who suddenly appeared in my life, and I felt very happy.

One day, fourteen years ago, I was crossing the street and I was about to be hit by a truck that was about to turn when an older brother suddenly appeared and pushed me to the side of the road, knocking my head hard and having a slight concussion. In my panic, I caught a glimpse of his eyes, very warm, and his back, which I still remember to this day. Although I know that person can't be Lin Muqi, the age is not right, but every time I see Lin Muqi, I feel familiar and reassured.

I like him, I can't help but like him. Whenever I have free time, I go to the library and wait for him to appear, and I am very happy to see him. Once, a male classmate next to him told me that his name was Cheng Dekai and that he was Lin Muqi's roommate, who were students at the medical university, and he left me a phone number. This is also why when I am about to graduate, you often see me and Cheng Dekai in the same frame, he often comes to take me to see Lin Muqi, Lin Muqi seems to be very busy, and he has very little time to accompany me, and I cherish this very little time. He disappeared without warning, I searched for him all over the world like a madman, he disappeared like this planet, I couldn't find him, my slightly bulging belly could no longer hide my pregnancy. I once thought about giving up this child, Cheng Dekai persuaded me not to kill the child, he was willing to be a nominal husband and wife with me, so that I could give birth to the child, and we would divorce after Lin Muqi appeared.

I took his advice and soon we started planning for the wedding, and during the wedding, the seven-month-old baby said no, it was gone, and that year I lost my uterus and could no longer have children. Cheng Dekai comforted me all the way and accompanied me, and we entered the palace of marriage in this way.

I am very grateful to Dekai, and I am determined to love this person well, but his suspicion is too serious, he always suspects that my heart is in Lin Muqi, and then it develops to doubt all the boys who have been in contact with me, things are getting more and more intense, even Lin Yuefeng has become the object of his suspicion, I began to hate such a marriage, very disgusted, I began to resist such a marriage, the more I resisted, the more violence I received. It wasn't enough to make me lose disappointment in life, but two months ago I discovered the secret that suffocated me, that he had done it to my children. This villain with a honey sword, he kept saying that he would help Lin Muqi take care of me, but he secretly added saffron to the soups such as pork rib soup, chicken soup, and duck soup that I stewed. Not only that, but the reason why he walked into the hall with me really surprised me, for the sake of Xingmei's shares, if Lan Youqing (Cheng Dekai's ex-girlfriend) hadn't told me this, I think I would still be in the dark.

Hate is exhausting. In the past two months, I have missed a special person, a mysterious uncle like my father, who said that death is not real death but the beginning of a new beginning, and I want a new beginning, a new life.

When I left, I was a little reluctant to say goodbye to my aunt, thanking her for taking care of me over the years and giving my life a little bit of home. On the occasion of parting, I prepared a larger house for you and your aunt, so that you can serve your aunt in the future. The key in the envelope is the key to the second drawer of my study, and I have placed the information and locks of the new house in the drawer.

I've known you for so many years, and I'm writing to you for the first time, but I don't know what to talk about. I still sincerely hope that you and Lin Yuefeng can be together, and the marriage of marrying love is a desirable blue harbor!

Xu Qian

2016/x/x

Su Nan's tears slid down the letter paper drop by drop, and the tears soaked the letter. She is really a big fool, a big fool, when she graduated, she was busy with her own defense and employment issues, ignoring Xu Qian, who was in need of attention, and she didn't know that Xu Qian lost her son and lost her uterus. Her tears flowed down with guilt and scolded: "Xu Qian, you fool, all the sadness, sadness, and grievances are borne alone......"