“... Yes, and many more. "As Lu Ke said, the questions that have been buried in my heart for a long time are one after another.

"Now give you a chance to ask, and I'll tell you everything I know. Lu Ke said.

I watched her drink more and more with her glass, so much so that I began to worry about whether she was conscious.

"Are you suspicious of my intentions?" Before I could speak, she pointed to my nose, "You think I've drunk too much, don't you?"

“... Well. "I didn't deny that to cover my thoughts in front of Lu Ke was to cover my ears and steal the bell.

"Haha, Xiao Ke, I just like people like you," she began to touch my head again, "I do drink a little too much, but don't worry, I'm just happy, my brain is not drunk." ”

"Don't touch my head like a pet..."I removed her hand and sorted out my thoughts, "First question, what do you mean when you said earlier that the Lu family belongs to the 'martial arts' department?"

"Did I tell me?" Luke blinked, "Oh yes! She stretched out three fingers, "The demonic power of each demon killer is different, which leads to their different ways of removing demons, in general, it is divided into three categories: law, martial arts, and essence, the law system is good at using spells to attack monsters, for example, Zong An is a master of using spells, and the martial arts department is like me, mainly through weapons and physical attacks to attack, and the essence system is known for controlling monsters, it is rumored that the essence of the demon killer can spy on the monster's heart, so as to subdue them, according to the current situation, you should belong to the essence of the demon killer." ”

“... I'm not a demon slayer. I muttered.

Lu Ke ignored me, and continued to talk, "In addition, the demon power attribute in the family will be passed on to the next generation, and one of the three categories of law, martial arts, and essence will be developed, and the law system is more common, and martial arts and essence are relatively rare, due to the frequent marriage between demon killers, there will occasionally be some demon killers, and there are two or even three attributes of demon power." ”

"Zong'an, how many attributes are there?" I asked.

"You care about him very much," Lu Ke raised his eyebrows and smirked, "He has two kinds, law and essence." ”

"No wonder it's so powerful..."I actually admired Zong An a little.

"He is indeed very good," Speaking of Zong An, Lu Ke's tone began to soften, "He was originally very talented, and the conditions of the Zong family also made him have a lot of experience compared to his peers, coupled with hard work and modesty, it is not an exaggeration to say that he is the most powerful demon slayer of the younger generation." ”

"Why does he hate youkai so much?" I said, "I wanted to ask you at the last demon slayer party, but you didn't give me a chance. ”

Lu Ke's hand holding the wine cup stopped at his lips.

"Xiao Ke, have you ever doubted this world?" she said, draining the glass of wine.

"I only doubted myself. I said.

"Do you remember the Gu Eagle incident you told you just now?" her hand kept resting on the white deer's bud, her face expressionless, and her eyes seemed to see something far away.

"Well, I remember. ”

"All the demon slayers who have experienced the Gu Eagle incident, to be precise, are young demon slayers," her brows furrowed slightly, "more or less, they are all lost in the whirlpool of their hearts, and some of them have not come out yet." ”

"I'm sorry..."Luke's rare depression made me a little uncomfortable, "I didn't understand?"

"Xiao Ke, imagine it," she narrowed her eyes slightly, "you think you are righteous, you think that the demon slayer is righteous, and you go there on behalf of your people for the justice in your heart, and you have no hesitation." But you find out that it's not what you thought it would be. That's right, these monsters have destroyed the homes of humans, and you will be furious when you look at those destroyed homes, and the demon slayer has the obligation to solve this problem, so you started the first actual battle of the demon slayer career, and you also had fear and uncertainty, but when you successfully killed your enemy, you will have the pride of being a demon slayer in your heart, so you won once, twice, three times, until your hands were covered with blood. ”

Her breathing started to be erratic and I didn't interrupt her.

"You look at your hands, and suddenly you are confused, in your education, youkai are evil, but the youkai who really stands in front of you may be just a little fox who is still underage, or a youkai who is also fighting to protect their homeland, they also have their own beliefs, and they are also crying and begging for mercy in front of you. Desperate life, but as a human being, as a demon exterminator, you have to kill without compassion, you have violated the admonition to cherish every life, against the will of nature, you begin to doubt what your own justice is, and you begin to disbelieve in yourself. ”

"Didn't the older demon slayer tell you this?" I asked softly, lest it disturb her sensitive nerves.

"It's just a very vague description," she said, "Before I went out, my mother once stopped me, I thought she was worried about my life, worried that I would not be able to fight against a monster of the level of Gu Eagle, and later I learned that she was worried that the incident would leave me with a traumatic memory, Xiao Ke, we deprived two hundred and seventy-two monsters of their lives in those three days, for a young demon slayer who had never experienced killing, it was indeed too cruel, enough to make a person lose faith, lose trust, Loss of faith. ”

"It's a massacre..."

"That's right, it's a massacre, or a massacre that lasted for three days," Lu Ke said, "Originally, the situation didn't develop so serious, when the young demon exterminators realized their cruelty, the Gu Eagle incident had actually been controlled, most of the monsters had fled the village, and the Gu Eagle was also controlled by the older demon slayer in the group, but..."

"And yet?"

"When your loved ones suddenly die in front of you, the nerves of the young people who are already on the verge of the limit completely collapse, and they lose their bodies and blood, leaving the young people with only hatred and hostility. Lu Ke sighed, as if it had taken a lot of courage to speak, "I remember that it was like an instant, and the old demon slayer all fell to the ground, bleeding profusely, and gradually withering as if they had been drained of their lives. ”

“... What happened?" I couldn't imagine that moment.

"Later, I learned that among the monsters found by the Gu Eagle, there was a kind of monster from the deep sea, which was completely unexpected to us at that time, this kind of monster was very small, parasitic on the Gu Eagle's body, and could quietly drill into the bodies of all those who approached the Gu Eagle, devouring them from the inside. ”

“......”

"But that's all for later, when we were young and saw the elders fall one by one, anger drowned out fear and reason, we are all representatives selected by each family, to be precise, we are the future leaders of each family, although the actual combat experience is insufficient, but we all have the ability to make the elders have to care. "Without warning, we wiped out all the monsters in the vicinity of the village, even those who escaped, and the only one who survived was the husband I saved in the first place." ”

"You said of the whirlpool," I looked at her, "I guess it's the after-effects of that incident." ”

"Well, that's right, for an inexperienced young man, that experience is worse than death," Lu Ke recuperated his glass, "Three days passed quickly, and we didn't really realize what was wrong with the demon slaying until we returned to the city with the remains of our elders. Her hands began to clench, "You think you're coming back like a hero, you think you're going to be remembered for the dead, but what? When we got back to the city, we realized that we didn't care how much you had paid, that the people were as lively and noisy as usual, that everything in the world was the same as before, that nothing had ever happened, that nothing had changed because of your sacrifice, that nothing had changed because of your sacrifice, that we didn't empathize with your pain, as if everything you did didn't matter, and in a trance, I began to wonder what the meaning of what I was doing and what was right in the world. ”

"Later, did you figure it out?" I asked.

"Want to understand?" she smiled, "How can you possibly figure it out, this is the most disgusting part of becoming a demon slayer, demon slaying is just a momentary thing, but when you encounter something similar to Gu Eagle, a year, five years, maybe ten years, twenty years, every day, you will experience the sequelae of that killing, you will find that where is the so-called justice and evil, in the struggle between humans and demons, there is no winner." ”

"This whirlpool... Will it come out?"

"Yes, there will always be an exit, it's just that everyone is different. "For example, I, for example, after that, I got tired of slaying demons, and I would find all kinds of excuses to escape from the profession that I used to be proud of, and I also drank too much, so that escaping reality gave me a sense of illusion." ”

"What about the others?"

"Some people came back and disappeared, and they have not been heard from since, and some people have given up the cause of slaying demons, and they have had nightmares since then. ”

"What about Zong'an?" I finally asked the original question.

"Ever since he saw his mother die in front of his eyes, he's like a different person," Luke said, "and he hasn't found the exit to the whirlpool in his heart until now." ”