In the midst of everyone's amazement, a woman flashed out on the side of the road, bullied her, and left after taking Xuanzang. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

Wukong said: "What's the situation? Could it be that the Buddha thinks this episode is too simple and wants to add a drama?"

Bajie said: "If it's the next episode, this rhythm is too fast, and there is a suspicion of shoddy production to rush the schedule!"

Wujing said: "Two brothers, don't guess anymore, let's hurry up and save the master!"

So the three of them drove the auspicious clouds and chased them in the direction where the monster fled.

The rest of the crowd looked at each other. After a long time, the queen muttered, "Is he going like this?"

The national teacher said: "Your Majesty, Weichen hasn't figured out the situation either." ”

The queen said, "How can this be!!, didn't you just say it well, why did he elope with another woman as soon as he turned around?"

The national teacher said: "Your Majesty, you must think about it." ”

The queen said: "Hmph, when he comes back, he will still find me a visa, see how I clean him up then!"

After saying that, the queen went back to the palace nonchalantly.

This is the story of a little woman who is waiting for a man who may never come back. Because this man is selfish and selfish, he only wants to learn the scriptures, but he refuses to sacrifice his life like Guanyin Bodhisattva.

However, Ben Xiaodao only likes comedy by nature, not tragedy, so he decided to rewrite this ending into another version:

In the midst of everyone's amazement, a woman flashed out on the side of the road, bullied her, and left after taking Xuanzang.

Wukong said: "What's the situation? Could it be that the Buddha thinks this episode is too simple and wants to add a drama?"

Bajie said: "If it's the next episode, this pace is too fast, and there is a suspicion of shoddy production to catch up with the schedule!"

Wujing said: "Two brothers, don't guess anymore, let's hurry up and save the master!"

So the three of them drove the auspicious clouds and chased them in the direction where the monster fled.

The wind and clouds changed abruptly, and by the time the queen and the others reacted, the three of Wukong had already flown away, and the queen clapped her hands and shouted: "Wow, so handsome!"

The national teacher asked, "You mean that Lei Gong's face?"

The queen said, "No, I'm talking about the fat-headed and big-eared one." ”

The national teacher said: "You don't even let go of a pig's head?"

The queen said, "Don't you think he has a lot of temperament? When they come back from the scriptures, I will take them both for myself and take them as my second house. ”

At this time, the rhythm of the fairy music floating in the air suddenly changed, and a woman's voice sang happily:

What are you looking at

What do you want

It turns out that you are my big pig brother!

......

Hundred officials, pawns.

Well, that ending seems to be too damaging for the atmosphere!

Okay, okay, this trail has to admit that this version of the revision ended in failure, let me spit out first! Director! What about the director! Can you cut this section directly??!!

――――――――――――――

The goblin caught Xuanzang and ran back to his cave as soon as he slipped away.

As soon as he arrived at the cave, the goblin threw down Xuanzang and sat at the stone table to rest.

Xuanzang snorted twice, and the monster asked, "Did it hurt you?"

Xuanzang said: "You fall so gently, it doesn't hurt too much." ”

The goblin said: "Brother Holy Monk, I didn't expect you to be quite calm." ”

Xuanzang said: "Are you calling me?"

The goblin said, "There is no one else in this room but you, of course I am calling you." ”

Xuanzang said: "Beauty, where is this?"

The fairy smiled and said: "I'm not afraid to tell you, this is my cave 'Poison Enemy Mountain Pipa Cave'." Why, are you still counting on your apprentices to save you?"

Xuanzang said: "Listening to your tone, you are not afraid of them at all?"

The goblin said, "If I am afraid of them, why should I arrest you?"

Xuanzang said: "Then what is the purpose of you arresting me here?"

The goblin said, "What do you want me to do?"

Xuanzang said: "Hope, of course I hope you don't arrest me." ”

The goblin said, "But I've already captured you." ”

Xuanzang said: "Okay, I hope you caught me to chat, I'm the best at chatting and telling stories." ”

The goblin said, "That's good, brother holy monk, you can chat with me." What do you like to talk about?"

Xuanzang said: "It depends on what you like to hear." ”

The goblin said: "What a flamboyant monk! Old lady, I will tell you clearly, today is the big day for the two of us, and we will visit the church later, but it will be two people!"

Xuanzang hurriedly said: "This is not good!"

The goblin said, "Why, you don't want to visit the church?

Xuanzang said: "I didn't mean that!"

The goblin said, "Then what do you mean?"

Xuanzang said: "Getting married, it's a big deal, I have to go back and discuss it with my parents." By the way, beauty, I don't even know your last name now. ”

The goblin sneered: "What a cunning monk, are you trying to find out my bottom of me? Do you want me to change back to my true form and let you see it?"

Xuanzang said: "What I said is the truth, you misunderstood me again." ”

The goblin said: "People like us who are in the rivers and lakes, why pay attention to those clichés? As long as both parties are satisfied, then the matter will be done." In a word, will you say yes or no?"

Xuanzang said: "This pace is too fast, I can't adapt to it for a while." Why don't you let me think about it first?"

The goblin said, "You want to delay time and wait for a few of your apprentices to come to save you, right?"

Xuanzang said: "Why don't you trust people like this? Am I so untrustworthy?"

The goblin said, "I think every word you say is a trap. ”

Xuanzang said: "Then what do you want me to say, so that you don't think it's a trap? Or let's gamble and see if I can say something that you believe." ”

The fairy said, "That's good." Now tell me, will you say yes or no?"

Xuanzang said: "What did you promise?"

The goblin said: "You are knowingly asking again! I ask you if you agree to marry in the church!"

Xuanzang replied without hesitation: "No." ”

The goblin said, "Well, you won, you did say something that would make me believe." ”

Xuanzang said: "Then can I go?"

The fairy smiled and said, "Do you think it's possible?"

Xuanzang said: "Didn't you admit defeat?

The goblin said: "It's rare to meet such an interesting monk, how can I be willing to let you go?"

Xuanzang said: "If you don't let me go, do you want me to stay and chat with you?"

The goblin said, "Do you think it's over chatting with me?"

Xuanzang said: "Then let's play something else." Qin, chess, calligraphy and painting, poetry and poetry?

The goblin said, "Don't talk about those useless ones! Your apprentice can't save you!"

Xuanzang said: "You and I have different paths!"

The goblin said: "It's exciting to think about!"

Xuanzang said: "The twisted melon is not sweet!"

The goblin said, "But it's fresh!"

Xuanzang said: "Then I won't obey to death!"

The goblin said: "The old lady has her own means!"

Xuanzang said: "What means do you have?"

The goblin was not in a hurry to answer, and slowly took out a small bottle from his arms, shook it in front of Xuanzang, and said, "Do you know what this is?"

Xuanzang said: "Bottle." ”

The goblin said, "Do you know what's in it?"

Xuanzang said: "Distilled water." ”

The goblin laughed and said, "Brother Holy Monk, should I say that you are naïve, or should I say that you are cunning?"

Xuanzang said: "Isn't it distilled water?"

The goblin said, "I might as well tell you the truth: I'm the best at poisoning." ”

Xuanzang said: "Are we the same surname?

The goblin said, "Who has the same surname as you?"

Xuanzang said: "My surname is Tang, I am Tang Xuanzang!"

The goblin said, "What about your surname Tang?"

Xuanzang said: "Aren't you from the Tangmen of Sichuan?"

The goblin said: "What kind of sugar gate salt door, I'm really fed up with you!" After that, she lowered her body and planned to pour medicine on Xuanzang.

Xuanzang said: "Wait!"

The goblin said: "The Spring Festival is worth a thousand gold, I can't wait!"

Xuanzang said: "You just need to tell me what's in this bottle, and the poor monk will obey you." ”

The goblin said, "Your condition is very tempting." ”

Xuanzang said: "Of course. ”

The goblin said, "Don't regret it!"

Xuanzang said: "Never regret it." ”

The goblin said, "Okay, I'll tell you." This bottle contains my own secret neurotoxin. ”

Xuanzang said: "So you want to poison me?"

The goblin said: "You think beautifully! My bottle of neurotoxin is diluted, and the toxicity is only one-ten-thousandth of the original!"

Xuanzang exclaimed: "Anesthetic!"

The goblin said, "That's right, it's an anesthetic." And my anesthetic is different, it can make you hallucinate. ”

Xuanzang exclaimed again: "Hallucinogens!"

The goblin said, "Not only that, but it can also make you feel a certain high mood." ”

Xuanzang was no longer able to complain: "It turned out to be spring ...... Spring ......."

The goblin laughed and said, "You know a lot! Are you an old driver?"

Xuanzang said: "What an old driver! The second profession I chose is the profession of a nurse, and I still know some general pharmacological effects." As the saying goes, even if I've never eaten pork, I've always seen pigs walking. ”

The goblin said: "I can't imagine that you still choose the profession of a wet nurse." ”

Xuanzang said: "Buddhism, if you want to solve the suffering of all sentient beings, it is normal to choose the profession of a wet nurse." ”

The goblin asked again, "And what was your first career?"

Xuanzang said: "My first occupation is to chant the scriptures excessively, commonly known as twitter. ”

The goblin said, "Oh, I see. Baby, you should know, you know it too, what do you say now?"

Xuanzang said: "I'...... I'm speechless!"