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According to the latest broadcast: Evaluated by thousands of netizens voting network, the redefinition of the representative title of Dick Silk:

... Smoking less than 20 yuan, beer less than 5 yuan, clothing average less than 200 yuan, monthly salary less than 4000, mobile phone used less than 1500 yuan, etc., we define him as a dick..."

In the dormitory, Xiao Li's laptop on the bed next to him broadcasts the latest issue of the state news.

"I'll go, I've lived for a long time, I'm not even as good as a dick, God, are you blind!

I'm so good that you can't see it, or pretend not to see it, hey... What kind of world is this!?" Liu Mang scolded while staring at his ** button mobile phone, and the time was displayed at 22:44.

Liu Mang, male, 26 years old, from Bingzhou, high school education, rich social experience, able to bear hardships and stand hard work, straightforward personality, enthusiastic, admit death, love to hug and fight.

A pure dick silk.,It should be now.,Ahem.,Even the dick silk is not as good as it!

I smoked cigarettes for less than 10 yuan, drank more than 3 yuan of beer, bought clothes from either a stall or a certain treasure, and never wore more than 100 yuan of so-called brand goods.

No house, no car, no money... Typical three-no product representative!

Working... It's in a restaurant, working as a waiter.

The happiest thing about every day is that every dish can be what can be... Take a sneak peek.

When you see a customer you like, you will be served a dish with all the mustaches and tails, and if you encounter a rude attitude and don't treat the waiter as a human being... , I'll just "ahh

Also, he thinks that he has no talent, and he is a thief, and he desperately thinks that this unfair god just didn't give him a chance...

"Have you thought about it, you really need to make drastic reforms, but... Who is the candidate this time!" A majestic voice remembered from above the Heavenly Court.

"Heavenly Court is currently... Hey, there's no one available!

I plan to try to find an excellent and trustworthy guy from the mortal world to preside over this Heavenly Court reform.

In this way, he can accommodate all my opinions, and I will fully support his work behind the scenes, this time... Strive for the success of the reform!" The Jade Emperor thought for a moment and said helplessly.

"Nothing else, but the personnel have to be selected well, the Heavenly Court has been reformed many times, and in the end it was all fruitless, this is not a simple matter, it involves all aspects of the Heavenly Court, in order for the Heavenly Court to be better, let's reform again...

In short, you are so self-conscious!" The majestic voice seemed helpless, but also vaguely expectant.

"Congratulations to the Buddha, go slowly..."The Jade Emperor said very respectfully.

"Ahh

Liu Mang had just fallen out of love, gritted his teeth and spent twenty yuan, bought half a dozen beer, took away half of the roast goose of the head chef Wang Da Fatty, and took away a bag of spicy dried tofu from Xiao Zhang in the dormitory.

Go straight to the roof of the building where the restaurant is located, and after eating and drinking, you will have a "world-weary jump", and you will be done.

In his own words: "It's too aggrieved to live like this, it's better to be reincarnated as soon as possible and be a new person..."

It turned out that I had a new waiter girl, and after just two days, the girl was so empathetic and not in love, the reason was that a bowl of spicy hot was in trouble!

The girl wanted to eat Malatang, so Liu Mang invited the sister to eat 6 pieces of vegetarian food.

Xiao Zhang in the same restaurant, also fell in love with this girl, with bad intentions, he invited the girl to eat 11 pieces of a bowl of meat, plus a can of drink, what is that, afraid of drinking ** Ji on fire.

Therefore, the girl weighed the pros and cons, carefully selected, considered it again and again, and when she was in a dilemma, she was decisive... Without a hint of hesitation, it's a split!

The more Liu Mang thought about it, the more aggrieved he became, and the more he thought about it, the more angry he became, rushed over, punched, kicked and slapped, three times and five divided by two, and then he was expelled......

A punch slammed into Xiao Zhang's nose, and Xiao Zhang vomited blood at that time... No, nosebleeds gushed out like a spring.

flew up and kicked into the face of the big fat man who pulled the bias, and the big fat man's face was played back in slow motion: one cheek was hit hard, and the fat face on the other side made a 1:0 visual comparison.

A slap (kuo) flew to see that the excitement was not a big deal, and the second cargo girl who clapped her hands.

After the fight, he was anxious by the restaurant manager, and Manager Jiao caught him.

I can't help but say that it is Liu Mang's problem, Liu Mang's biggest mistake, Liu Mang is mainly responsible...

Anxiety often bullied Liu Mang, and finally caught the pigtail and was able to bully people, so he started Liu Mang's fight from scratch, and the little things became big!

After "friendly" consultations between the three parties, the results are as follows:

First of all, it is a serious warning to Liu Mang, you are dead... Then I was anxious and said that I wouldn't call the police, so let's deal with it internally.

1. The monthly salary is 2,000 yuan, and all three people will be compensated, which is considered a physical loss fee (Liu Mangxin said: "I will go, I will be beaten with a fist, a kick and a palm, and the average average price of each fee is 667 yuan, which is not cheap!")

2. Sincerely apologize to the three of them and apologize!(Liu Mangxin said: "Your sister, it's good to kill your group of spicy chickens, lie down, apologize, I wish you a good death and early life!")

3. Fired from the restaurant. (Liu Mangxin said: "I don't do it yet, go to your sister's, I don't keep my grandfather here, I have my own place to keep my grandfather, I don't keep my grandfather everywhere, do you want to be self-employed, self-employed, I just think about it, I still jump off the building...")

Looking at the only 68.5 yuan left in his hand, Liu Mang raised his head and finally spoke: "God, do you sincerely let me die or what, do you want to play with me! you, I'll go, I won't accept it!"

"Hum", "Take your bag", "Bang", the dormitory door is closed...

Liu Mang raised his right middle finger towards the door, took his bag, turned around and walked out of the dormitory door.

Inside the bag were two pieces of clothing, a pair of slippers, and a copy of... Liu Mang's favorite book, the name of the book is "Dick Silk Eventually Becomes a God".

"I don't believe it, without you, the earth won't turn, I'm not alive, don't forget that I'm a "hooligan", don't accept to bite me!"

Although, saying so, he also thinks so, in the end, after eating and drinking, let's have a "world-weary jump"!

At least, in my life... I should be able to go back to TV and become a celebrity!

Newspapers, and websites, must be reported, right? After I died, I was finally able to be promoted once in a majestic and domineering manner, although it was just a suicide incident...

The title is written like this, Liu Mang took a sip of beer, and said to himself: "Shanglian is, the world-weary young man is trapped by love, and the lower link is, jumping off a high-rise building to commit suicide because of love." Horizontal batch: crushed into bone residue. ”

"Fuck, it's so unfair, I'm only 26 years old..."The more I thought about it, the more uncomfortable it became, and my eyes became rosy.

"Young man, drinking alone!" asked an old man dressed in a white Tang suit, with white hair and white beard, and kind eyebrows.

"Eh, old man, come on, have a drink with me, I'm going to be a trapeze artist in a while, let's go one, I didn't expect... In the last moments, thank you for coming to drink with me as a loser. “

As he spoke, he gave the old man a bottle of beer, handed it over, felt that something was wrong, took it back, and bit the cap with a "bang" of his teeth, and then handed it over again.

"Old man, you say, why am I so unlucky, my mother gave birth to me and died, my father misses my mother, has a mad disease, has been missing for more than 20 years, and now I don't know whether to live or die, I am my grandfather who picked up rags and garbage to feed me.

After finishing high school at the age of 18, I have no money to go to college, you don't know, I am the third place in the college entrance examination in our county, just because I have no money, or I am still a student of *Chinese famous university.

Hey, I just wanted to work to earn some money, but before I could honor my grandfather, his old man was gone...

In the past few years, I have been lonely and helpless, and I am too aggrieved... Woo."

As if letting go of his heart, he raised his head and poured two sips of beer with "Goo Dong, Goo Dong".

"I can't see it, you're quite pathetic!

But why do you scold God for being unfair... He didn't provoke you!"

The old man frowned, took a sip of beer, pursed his lips, put down the bottle, and asked puzzledly.

"Why can't I scold, is God fair? I don't say anything about any money or anything, it's because I don't have the ability to earn it.

But am I... Don't even have the right to have a warm home!?

I'll just scold him, God, you big bastard, if you don't accept it, you're going to bite me!" As soon as he scolded, the corner of his eye skimmed the old man, and he saw that the old man's white beard was upturned one by one.

Liu Mang's eyes were drunk and hazy, thinking that he was dazzled, and rubbed his eyes vigorously, it really is!

The white-bearded old man, now the first Buddha who is angry was born, and the second Buddha ascended to heaven.

"You... How... What... Just... Yes... No... Scold... I... Oh no! I... Be... Say... Don't scold God...!" The old man gritted his teeth angrily and asked coldly.

"Don't scold him, don't scold him, how boring I'm in!

However, if he can change my fate and become a rich man, haha... Not only do I not scold him, but I also burn incense and kowtow to him every day...

Is it possible, though!?"

Liu Mang threw away the empty bottle, picked up another bottle, bit the cap of the bottle, and picked up the roast goose here.

Just wanted to take a bite, as if he remembered something, and handed it to the old man, the old man shook his head, Liu Mang smiled, "clicked" a big bite, and the corners of his mouth were oily when he ate.

"Do you just want to be rich, and everything can be better when you have money?"

The old man was puzzled, the young man in front of him seemed to be unable to support the wall with mud, and rotten wood could not be carved!

"Yes, money is important to me!

If I don't have money, what will I do to build a school in the village, and if I don't have money, what will I use to build roads in the village, and if I don't have money, what will I use to repay the people who helped me!

The most important thing is to help me all the time, take care of my Da Fei and Erfat parents, what to take..."

Liu Mang was a little confused when he said this, he didn't drink much at first, but he had already drunk four bottles, and now he looked a little dizzy.

"Yo, this kid, I thought you had money, you want to spend all your time, what do you want... To use the name of the mortal world, by the way, pretending to be forced... I didn't expect you, kid, to impress me!

Well, I'll give you a chance!"

The old man patted his forehead, a little embarrassed, and suddenly, he heard Liu Mang's last words, which finally made him make up his mind...

"Old man, let me tell you, I'm not called a hooligan, I'm called Liu Mang. ”

Liu Mang was confused, and seemed to be talking to himself: "Okay, let's get acquainted, I'll tell you quietly, don't tell others, my surname is Liu, you know this, right?"

The name was given to me by my grandfather, my family does not grow mangoes, nor do I love mangoes, in fact, my grandfather told me that the grass dies for mangoes, so I have to start over, live for hope, live for hope...!

I'm Liu Mang, but not a "hooligan", remember my name, my name is Liu Mang... Liu... Awn... Before he finished speaking, he tilted his head and fell asleep.

"In that case, God, I'll give you a chance, I hope you cherish it, if it messes around, you will know what the wrath of thunder is, and don't scold me, scold me again, I will..." The old man said, looked at Liu Mang, thought about it, pointed to the distance with his finger, only to hear the "click" of the night sky in the distance, a deafening thunder.

"Let you know that I, God, also have a temper!"

As soon as this sentence was finished, a ray of white light appeared in the old man's hand, and he pointed at Liu Mang lightly, and the white light slowly revolved around Liu Mang's body, only to see Liu Mang's body tremble slightly, and the white light entered... Then, the old man disappeared.

In the dark night, on the roof of the building, only Liu Mang's clear snoring was heard...