(I'm really sorry, I just entered the house, and I was late, I'm sorry.) 263...... 084...... 458...... Book friend skirt, if you want to come, join the group. P.S. Friends who have passed by ask for collections and recommendations, and your support is my biggest motivation. In addition, it is good for everyone to give more opinions, thank you. PS2: The title of the book has been changed, please see the work related)

Is it a dream again? I understand.

Even if I walk out of the past, even if I accept salvation, even if I try to face my past, sin is still a sin, an unforgivable, irreparable sin.

Dry bones everywhere, yellow sand in the sky, endless undead in the distance, and companions who trust me to follow me in the distance, I am Kyle, who once thought himself the most perfect human being, and once deceived the whole world with the appearance that he had successfully deceived.

Once upon a time, I was burdened with the grave sin of conceit, proud to consider myself fearless, selfless, and omnipotent, the embodiment of all the good in the world, and possessing qualities comparable to those of God. But the cruel reality crushed my pride, destroyed my conceit, timidity, selfishness, weakness, everything I once despised appeared in my heart one by one in the face of reality.

It turns out that this is the real me, and it turns out that my heart is so dirty.

Again I was weak, again I was cowardly, again I was selfish. I don't dare to face my actions, I don't dare to face such filth, I dare not face my true self. So, I ran away and escaped with a crash. I**, I'm depraved, I'm indulgent, I've done everything I can to cover my eyes, and if I could, I wouldn't even be able to wait to end my own life to escape it all. But alas, she used her last strength to give me the same life as that body, which is close to eternity. Oh, is this punishment? But why do I see sorrow and pity in your last glance? What are you pitying? Are you pitying that filthy and despicable me?

In the escape, I think that timidity, selfishness, and weakness are my true selves, so I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate myself deeply, but I can't do anything about it, I can only live like this, day after day, forever. But is that really me? Why do I always feel tempted to help others when they are in trouble? Why do I always put myself in danger? Is it just because this body will never die anyway?

What is the real me? conceited, senseless, selfless, or cowardly, weak, selfish? I really want to know, what is the real self?

I can see that my mates are fighting, she is fighting, and I, in fact, am also fighting involuntarily. I really want to talk to her again, I really want to hold her hand again, I really want to make up for the sorry that I owe for a hundred years. Why can't I control my body, why can't I just watch silently and do nothing?

"You finally want to face me. "Is this Nelly's voice? she's looking at me? Everything around me seems to freeze frame, the voice I haven't seen for a long time, the eyes I haven't seen for a long time, the tenderness I haven't seen for a long time, I want to laugh, but my heart is dripping blood: "But why don't you want to talk to me yet?"

"I ......" I was surprised to find that I could actually control my body and actually be able to speak.

"Are you...... "For the first time, I realized that my voice could tremble to this point, a trembling voice, a trembling body, a trembling soul.

Nelly didn't answer, her clear eyes just looked at me quietly, gentle, calm, as before.

"No, you're not Nelly. I said aloud, my voice no longer trembling, and my head slowly raised.

"So, who am I?" said Nelly, who did not deny it, looking at me with a slightly mischievous look on her face as before.

"You are just a phantom in my heart. I suddenly understood something, and my tone became more and more firm: "You are the shadow that Nelly left in my heart, fundamentally, you are actually me, you are just a mirror in my heart." ”

"That's right. Nelly smiled and applauded.

"I finally got it. I felt like my brain had never been so clear, and all the chaos became clear: "This is not her hatred of me at all, nor is it the punishment of the gods for my sins, the builder of this dream cage is myself, and the imposer of punishment is also myself." This is just a place where the past is stored that I dare not face, this is just my real heart, so I can never escape, how can I escape from myself?"

"It's good that you've finally thought of it, and I can rest assured. Nelly exhaled softly, "Really, it's always been so unsettling, Kyle." ”

"So the only way to really break this cage is to face it, accept it, let it merge with my heart, and ...... it like this" I was suddenly stunned, thinking of Nelly's words just now, and looked at her blankly: "You, you are not just a shadow, who are you." ”

"Shhhh Nelly held up her finger to her mouth, "It's almost time, it's time for you to wake up." As for who I am? fool, it's just your dream here, and I'm just your dream, just as stupid. ”

"Goodbye, Kyle, goodbye, my ...... Wife. ”

――――――――――――――――――――

"Whew, whew, whew. Pannis, as usual, awoke from his dream, gasping and sitting up.

This time, he didn't tremble, he didn't sweat, only the shock from the heart. Spread your hands in front of your eyes, then clenched them again, trying to grasp something, but all you could hold was nothingness.

"So, is it just my dream?" Pannis smiled self-deprecatingly, and sighed softly in a weak voice: "It's really just a dream, how can she be so gentle with someone like me." ”

With a "whoosh", a metal bottle flew from the back of his head, and Pannis reached out directly to the back of his head without looking back, pinched the mouth of the bottle and put it to his mouth, and the cold water quickly poured into his throat, relieving the thirst caused by the dream. Pouring a bottle of water, Pannis looked up and peered out through the tiny gaps in the canopy. It was late, the outside world had fallen into darkness, and the dense forest was even darker, except for a small campfire in the camp. Catherine sat around the campfire in chain mail, and the goblin illuminator that she had bought from the Capital of Knowledge stood next to the campfire, and the lights could be turned on at any time if something unusual happened, and the light was bright enough to envelop the entire camp.

There were only ten people in the group, so the camp was not large, but the arrangement method was very interesting, and it was a special way to camp in the dense forest.

Because there is a layer of fallen leaves more than half a meter deep in the dense forest, it is difficult to quickly clear a clean clearing, so the professionals who go deep into the dense forest have summed up a set of camping methods with thousands of years of experience.

The foundation of the camp is more than 30 metal pipes of various thicknesses and some parts can be stretched freely, these metal pipes are very tough, and they will not break or deform easily. If you are a skilled practitioner of this set of tools, you can assemble these metal pipes by yourself, and when they are assembled, the metal pipes will form a square metal support platform about 30 centimeters above the ground, with a metal tube inserted deep into the ground at the center of each of the four top corners and each side of the platform as a fixed support.

On the surface of the grid-like metal support platform, it is covered with a layer of metal mesh made of fine and strong thick metal wire, and the edge of the metal mesh is integrated by a bracket lock composed of a connecting lock and a metal rod, forming a slightly elastic plane for people to walk, sit and lie down for daily living. In the center of the metal mesh is an insulated spar platform that can be fixed to the bottom net, on which a bonfire burns, and the rest of the space can be set up with a tent with a special lock, or a sleeping bag can be placed directly on the surface to rest.

This special camping equipment is worth 800 to 1,000 gold coins, and the main reason for such a high price is that some special metals are more expensive because it is necessary to take into account the load-bearing capacity and the strength of the parts, and also to take into account the weight of all the parts for ease of carrying. This is what was bought in the Holy Capital before departure, despite Catherine's desperate opposition, under the gaze of Catherine's father-killer. In fact, it is true that as Pannis said, although such a set of equipment is expensive, it can be used in many bad locations, and as long as there is no fighting, it can be used for many years, which is not a loss.

"Is it your turn to be on guard?" said Pannis, standing up and walking lightly over to Catherine and sitting down. The only defect of this set of equipment is that the metal mesh is connected, and if the action on it is too large, it will cause the metal mesh to resonate and affect the rest of others, so you must walk lightly on it.

"Yes. Catherine was doing her second favorite thing - taking care of her weapons and armor, and of course, her favorite thing was obviously counting money. Hearing Pannis's question, Catherine nodded and said softly, "What, another nightmare?"

"Nightmare?" Pannis smiled self-deprecatingly, "Maybe it's not a nightmare, but it's not pleasant overall." ”

"That should be your congratulations. Catherine put down her work and raised her head with a gentle smile: "It's a good thing to be able to get out of the nightmare, even if it's only slightly better, it's a good thing to celebrate, isn't it?"

Looking at the tenderness on Catherine's heroic countenance, Pannis felt that he had traveled through time, as if he had seen the woman who had held a spear in the midst of countless enemies, but whose waist was always straighter than a spear, and seemed to see again the bitter tenderness that could only be inadvertently revealed when facing herself. The two knights, who had no similarity in appearance but were exceptionally close in temperament, seemed to slowly coincide in the wrong time and space, and the illusion of chaos made him a little stupid for a while.

"Whew, yes, it's worth celebrating. Pannis exhaled in dismay, "It's all thanks to you, thank you." ”

"Thanks? Catherine said dissatisfiedly, "Remember how many times you saved us in the weeping cave? In the past few months, for many of our vices and quirks, what have you not done to tolerate and help us?

"Well, it's me who is bad. Pannis chuckled, nodded, and said, "Never again." ”

"Hmph, it's long overdue. Catherine wrinkled her nose and smiled a little mischievously, "Alright, wake everyone up, it's time to go." ”