I'm called Cheng Zhijie, a native of Jeju Donga Turtledove Shop. My mother said that I am not an ordinary person, and when I was born, the house smelled strange, and the room was full of red light! Although my father later said that the house seemed to be on fire in the days when I was born, and the house was smoky and burning! But my mother's words, I believe it more! My mother is a good person, I am also a good person, but I am not an ordinary person!

When I was five years old, I could eat several bowls of dry rice, and my father wanted to buy me! At that time, my mother said to me: "Son, I know that your belly is big, so ah, when you eat in the future, drink four or five bowls of water first, so that you will eat all-you-can-eat, and you will eat full every day!" Fortunately, in those years, the wind and rain were smooth, and the most important thing in the family was food, if it weren't for that, my father said, if I had a big belly like me, I would have starved to death!

When I was seven years old, a Xiu surnamed Lu saw me, saying that I was born with a blessed appearance, full of good fortune, and said that I would be able to become an atmosphere! But I only saw him eat a good meal at my house for a few days, and I didn't see how much ability he had, but when he was leaving, he gave me a book, on which a small figure was drawn, and how to use an axe! He told me that this is a supreme secret book, let yourself take a good look, if someone gives you an ax in the future, you will understand! You will be invincible in the world! But after reading the book for a few days, I found that the man was a liar, and I used the axe a few times according to the appearance of the little man in the painting, except that I was almost hit by the axe, which was basically useless! However, when I wiped my buttocks in the book, the paper was quite soft! I may only remember the names of a few tricks in the book, called "pluck out the ears, dig out the eyes" or something.

When I was seven years old, an old man from the village who performed a puppet show came to the village, and he could control a lot of wooden people with a single red thread, and he could also say all kinds of words in different tones. But if you want to refine it, you must find a person who calls yourself Cheng Biting Jin! So I believed him, and I fiddled with the stone according to his method for many years, but it was still useless!

Later, when I was 20 years old, I married a jujube flower from a neighboring village, and she gave birth to a big fat boy for me, and I gave him a very nice name, called Cheng Tieniu, which is very atmospheric and beautiful! Later, there were several people in the village who also learned from me and named their children Tie Niu, and I was so angry! But then I beat them all! I thought I might live my life in peace like this, knowing that year, hey!

That year, I really shouldn't have eaten that full meal! It was the first time I had eaten a full meal in more than 20 years, and I had eaten all the food in his store that day! He was stunned and amazed when he ate! That person shouted out the name that often appeared in my dreams, "Cheng Biting Jin"! So I became the gatekeeper of his house. In fact, I was ready to run away immediately when I first started, but I ate too much of my own shaved noodles, and I couldn't stand up, so I could only lie in the small gatehouse of his house, and kept sighing and worrying! But three days later, when I was able to stand up and run away, that person actually became the national teacher of the Tang Dynasty, and after looking at the mountain of silver he gave me, I gave in, and I really became a janitor!

The moment I picked up the plate axe, I understood that Lu Xiucai didn't lie to me back then, and I really immediately understood the kung fu of those axes. Those few tricks were miraculous. I danced a few times. That person, who was the later national teacher Li Huo, said to me with a smile: "If my exercises are complete, I am basically invincible in the world!" After Li Huo saw the white stone that I often fiddled with in my hand, he really had to find hundreds of people for me to train me, and let them be the security guards at home according to the arrangement of the stones! I have more and more subordinates, and their actions are more and more in line with the placement of my stones, I am here, the only two-story security chief in the world, and I am the head of the janitor! I know that I am very powerful, but I don't know how powerful I am! Until that day!

It seemed to be the eighth day of the fifth month, and on that day His Majesty the Emperor came to inspect our work on the second floor! He said that his third son seemed to be very dissatisfied with the fact that he had shot his daughter-in-law as his wife, and that he wanted to do something to come out and how he should deal with it! Just as Li Huoguo was about to say something, suddenly an army of nearly 10,000 people surrounded our second floor. They forced us to hand over His Majesty the Emperor! So they attacked, we defended! They attacked, we defended!

The effect of the large array of blocks I arranged finally showed its power, and the attacking soldiers could not see us at all, they ran around my place like blind men, and we killed them one by one!

I actually sympathize with him, if I did what he did, I would not have beaten him to death! However, I would never do that kind of thing, because I am a normal person. And he Lao Tzu is not, he Lao Tzu is the emperor, that is not a normal person, not even a person!

That night, an old man came to my porter, holding a jug of good wine, and chatting with me. We both drank a lot of wine! I saw that he was very upset, so I asked him what had happened, why was he unhappy?

The man seemed to be very sad and said, "For a woman, a beautiful woman." ”

I then said thoughtfully: "For the sake of women, you can't do anything too much, you want heaven to heaven, and earth to earth!"

"That woman once died at my own hands, and I killed her with my own hands!"

"Back then. When I chased Tie Niu's mother, I put a lot of effort into it, and I went to her door every day to learn how to bark dogs, so that their whole family couldn't sleep well every night, and I secretly watched her every day!"

"She didn't complain about me until she died, she reincarnated to come back to see me, I can't bear her again!"

"Later, I sneaked into her house to see her, and I cooked raw rice with her!"

"She is my wife, not my son's wife, but my son wants to marry my wife, and I robbed her back!"

"My father said that I did this authentically, like him, he also abducted his mother like this, and he basically didn't spend a penny to marry his mother back then, but his father-in-law's family subsidized a lot"

"My son is doing this to me now, what should I do, I can't kill him, after all, I'm also at fault! After all, she is his nominal wife! What should I do!"

"My father pretended to beat me that day, and carried me to my father-in-law's house like that, so I went into the cave that night, and my wife and I have been in harmony with each other to this day!"

"I'm going to kill that rebel, I'm not dead yet, he wants me to die immediately, if it weren't for Li Huoguoshi's preparation this time, we would probably be dead, this rebel, for a woman, is going to do such a poison to his own father, I want him to die immediately!"

"My son was born and peed on my head, not only did I not get angry, but I was happy like crazy, I love my son to death!"

"Yes, he is still my son, I did something wrong, I can't let him die immediately, I have to let him live well, I want him to regret what happened today for the rest of his life!"

"Yes, I still have to live well, watch him marry a wife and have children, live well! It's good to be alive, hahaha!"

"Yes, it's good to be alive, I can see her again, I can get her forgiveness, I can get their mother and son's forgiveness, I'm beautiful and happy!"

So, when I was drunk again, without knowing it, I saved King Qi's life. I seem to have built another seventh-level floating slaughter! I'm really proud of me!

Later, the next day, when I woke up, I learned that the old man was the Tang Emperor Li Yuan. I almost scared myself to death! Fortunately, I didn't say anything rebellious at that time, or I wouldn't have been "clicked" by the emperor!

The emperor smiled and asked me: "You led a thousand old and weak against an army of more than 10,000 yesterday, you have made a great contribution, do you have anything you want to do? I can satisfy you!"

I blurted out without thinking: "I'm just a gatekeeper, I'm just a good doorkeeper", I regret dying, I don't actually think so, I want to say: "I want to go home, I want to go home, I want to my wife and son!"

In the end, I was still the gatekeeper, the royal gatekeeper! The emperor made me the general in front of the palace, the head of the forbidden army, and his subordinates were in charge of all the defense of the palace, and there were three deputy generals under him, as if they were called Shan Xiongxin, Qin Qiong and Wei Chigong!

But this former general of the palace just has a beautiful name for his janitor career. He is still a janitor, a janitor who can cause trouble to others! But he still has a little secret, but the Xiucai surnamed Lu back then didn't let himself tell others! Hehe