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Someone said: There are two worms in man's body, one is a poor worm and the other is a nasty worm. When the poor worm attacks, it brings pity to people, and when the hateful worm attacks, it brings disgust and dislike. There is a proverb that says, "The poor must have something to hate," and it lacks the next. That is: there is something to learn from those who hate them.

In the study of the mechanism of hate, psychologists say that when we hate someone, it is often because the other person has the same shortcomings as us.

And the other party exposes our shortcomings, so we also express our hatred for him. This is the secret that hates this kind of thought activity, so it happens.

For example: celebrities, public figures, celebrities...... More or less, while being "openly loved" by some people, he is also "secretly disgusted" by another part. In addition to this, values, lifestyle, sense of identity, everyone has their own behavior patterns. Count the people around you, there will always be annoying people. He'll say that I hate what kind of people. In fact, behind us may be the object of being hated and criticized by others, whether it is in the workplace, family, circle of friends, or media. The older generation often said, talk less, do more, look at Albert Einstein, "after his name is always the theory of relativity, not his extramarital affairs".

In places where there is no oxygen, anaerobic bacteria can run rampant. Learning is oxygen and sterilization.

There is a critic who put it this way: the most hated person is the other me in the world. I think it's true that the best thing about the most annoying people is the ghosts to be discovered.

I remember when I was a child, my Chinese teacher, Master Meng, said to me: There is a famous Zen case about Su Dongpo and Buddha Yin Zen Master, Su Dongpo asked Buddha Yin Zen Master who he looked like, Buddha Yin said that he looked like Buddha, Su Dongpo ridiculed him and said: I see you like a pile of cow dung.

Buddha Yin stopped talking. Su Dongpo happily went home and told Su Xiaomei, Su Xiaomei said: Brother, you lost again this time, you see what others are, you yourself are what you are, your opinion is a projection of your heart.

In fact, hate is a sentimental statement, and if we look at it rationally, there is something worth learning from almost the most hated people. The common stress response of people is to sympathize with the weak and hate the strong. The powerful must have something to hate, and the most hated object is often "guilty" because of being strong. The American philosopher Emerson said that all heroes end up being annoying.

People use hated patterns to achieve some kind of balance and equality, so as to adapt to the Darwinian ecological environment of "survival of the strong".

The reason why there is the most annoying person is because it is also a person that we are not capable of. There is no reason not to learn from him. Therefore, switching from nasty mode to learning mode is the best way to deal with the things around you. Hate is like a brake, learning is stepping on the accelerator, in the historical fast lane of economic acceleration, hate makes people sober, but in the stagnation lane of the current financial crisis, learning makes people progress.

Everyone is not only good at seeing the devil in the eyes of his lover, but also good at seeing the devil in the eyes of his enemies -- if he likes someone, he is an angel, and if he hates someone, he is the devil. In fact, if we put aside the worldly perspective and calmly think about the people we hate, are they really worthless? On the contrary, many of their abilities, efforts, and endurance are really worth emulating. As the saying goes: there are no rules to learn. Those who are at the forefront are in learning mode. But people also get worried, and they say to themselves, "I'm finally the person I hate."

There is also this risk, which is why some people joke that when you become the person you hate, then you are considered successful.

No one person can please everyone, and the most hated person is also a relative concept. Remember a useful saying: Treat the person you hate the most to dinner, not your favorite.

To sum up, in a word, each of us has one of the greatest enemies around us, and that is jealousy and suspicion. Because of all kinds of things in society, we have a kind of illusion, what kind of illusion? That is to say, when our business does not achieve the slightest success, in addition to self-pity, we will also have a kind of rebellious mentality. We think that all those successful people must be a bunch of cheaters, so we look down on them from the bottom of our hearts and regard them as our imaginary enemies. And never calm your mind and think deeply about what all this is for?

Therefore, I think we should learn from the above things, learn to learn from the people we hate, study the little strengths they have, and make up for our shortcomings. Maybe you'll really become the person you usually hate, that is, a successful person.

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