In this extreme irritability, going to work must be absent-minded, so she wears earplugs all the time, like a fool, or rather, more like a walking corpse that really has no soul, Yaping stood on the side several times, and she didn't notice it.

And at noon, Yaping sat next to her, and several times she spoke, he was just eating unpalatable meals in a trance, as if he didn't hear it, until Yaping took off his earplugs, and then asked him: "Didn't you say that the earbuds are very uncomfortable to wear?" How can you wear it when you eat? ”

He looked at the angry Yaping, looked at the earbuds in Yaping's hand and just smiled bitterly: "Oh, I just forgot." ”

Actually, he didn't forget about the earbuds, but he really didn't want to take them down, maybe just because he didn't want to hear other voices in this company, right? So after eating, he put on earplugs again, and even when he smoked in the smoking room, he was wearing earplugs, of course, he also saw a lot of new employees squatting on the ground smoking, he understood that these new employees just stood for more than ten hours a day, which was too tiring, but everyone was like this.

So far, it can be said that the madman has been working in the company recently, and he has completely lost his soul, this kind of thing is not only in Yaping's eyes, but also in the eyes of all other colleagues, they all say that the recent madman doesn't know what's going on, and the whole person looks like a different person, no matter when he is stupid, even wearing earplugs at all times, and ignoring anyone.

Therefore, this matter has continued, he has been in this kind of stupidity as others say for more than ten days, and now there is only a little more than a month before the New Year, at this time, he has gotten off work today, sitting in a warm rental house, the cold wind is howling outside, but it has not rained in the past few days, but even so, the outside world is still so cold that it can be collapsed.

However, now he is just sitting at his desk, holding a pen, copying books, and holding a lit cigarette in his left hand, as for Yaping is watching TV, and he is still holding a fluffy brown bear, it is at this time that Yaping suddenly spoke: "I will go home for the Chinese New Year this year, will you go to my house with me?" ”

Originally, he was just smoking a cigarette while thinking about the content of the book, but Yaping's sentence instantly pulled him back to reality, yes, the whole world in the book is almost like fiction, and the extremely cold, or the poor and extremely ordinary life without money, this is reality.

But why is it said that the madman now has an air-conditioned room, an extremely soft Simmons bed, and even such an excellent Yaping company, but why is this life still so ordinary and poor? In fact, it is not difficult to imagine that this is a dirty and extremely noisy residential area, and the provincial high-level seems to be preparing to demolish this place, so this is not their eternal home, besides, this is not their own home in the first place, and it cannot be their own home.

I don't have a home, as for the bank card, there are only more than 6,000 yuan at present, and Yaping's card is only more than 10,000 points, all the money of the two people is combined, and it is a fool's dream to have a common home, so it can only be said that it is poor.

Another is that Yaping's so-called want to go back to her hometown with her, which obviously means that she wants her to meet her parents, and the girl takes the boy to see her parents, which is enough to fully explain that she has the idea of getting married, so he understands that this issue is very serious, so it is definitely not a joke.

But he understands very well that his current situation can't give Yaping happiness at all, because he doesn't even have a home, and the so-called marriage doesn't cost money? Don't need a bride price? More importantly, don't you need a home? So he was distracted, looking at the notebook in front of him, looking at the book, looking at the pen in his hand, and once again doubting whether he had chosen the wrong direction of his life, and he really had such doubts.

Because no matter how hard you work on the pen and handwriting, or even copy more books, it seems that you can't earn a dime at all, or in other words, you can't get money at all by doing these things, and all you can get is a little satisfaction in your own spiritual world, but the reality is very cruel, and for everyone who has no money, the reality is cruel and inhumane.

It is precisely because of the extremely cruel reality that every poor child or adult who has no money will spend all the time of his life on how to earn money, when he thinks of this, he understands for the first time that it is not that others have done something wrong, nor that others regard himself as an outlier who does not pursue money, because people who pursue money have not done anything wrong, everyone is just to live in the humble extreme, it is really nothing more, and everyone regards him as an outlier, It is also completely reasonable, because the ultimate essence of our world, money is everything, and without money, we will lose everything, including the loss of the value of pursuing life, because whether it is a pen, a book, or even the food we need to eat every day, we need money in exchange.

In short, his mind is very chaotic now, and this is the first time that he has thought about why he is seeking wisdom in such seriousness, maybe he really went in the wrong direction from the beginning, right?

Then he lit a cigarette and smoked numbly, while Yaping continued to watch TV, but this does not mean that Yaping has forgotten her own inquiry, Yaping is waiting for an answer, she is really waiting, so now Yaping doesn't look very happy, even if she is watching TV, she looks absent-minded.

At this point, the madman smiled, put down the pen in his hand, and even put down the cigarette, got up, and sat on the edge of the bed, gently stroked her long soft hair, and whispered: "Look, huh? I don't have anything now, I want money but no money, I want a career without a career, and even I told you about the situation in my own family, I don't even have my own home, and now I go to your house and meet your parents with you, your parents will definitely not agree to hand you over to me, and if it really comes to that point, won't things get worse? ”

Yaping pursed her lips and smiled, although she was indeed very unhappy, but she fully understood that what the madman was saying was originally an undoubted truth, so far she seemed to have some kind of thinking, so she said: "Okay, you have to work hard next year, you must be a very good man, this year, I will go home alone, and I will come back after the New Year." ”

That's right, Yaping did say so, but the madman didn't understand it at all, he really didn't understand, the so-called hard work, the so-called being an excellent man, is this year really enough? Or strictly speaking, I don't even have a direction at the moment, I really don't have any direction on how to make money, I'm really confused, but this confusion can't let Yaping know, and this is just afraid of losing Yaping in an instant, Yaping is really too good, I really don't want to lose her.

However, if you don't want to lose Yaping, you must face the most cruel reality, money, how to get money? Looking at the pen and notebook on the desk again, and even this "Zizhi Tongjian", it is very obvious, really obvious, these things do not bring money to themselves, and they will continue to spend a lot of time and even money, so seriously, if it is for the pursuit of money, copying books is itself a waste of time in the real sense.

It's just that his thinking is so clear, so clear, but he still casually wants to leave a lie, yes, he is going to lie to Yaping, although he doesn't want to do this, but he is selfish, afraid of saying his own confusion, which will make Yaping abandon himself, so far, this is really a lie: "Well, I will work very, very hard next year, don't worry." ”

But Yaping was full of smiles, as if she felt that this was a promise that could no longer be true, and hugged him happily, at this moment, as if the TV shows had lost their attraction to her, the two kissed together, really kissed for a long time, she said, there was a smell of smoke in his mouth, and he was just in an extremely complicated mood, smiling bitterly.

After a while, Yaping suddenly got up, then took the pants hanging on the hanger next to her bed, and took out a folded white paper from it, the madman didn't know what it was, he really didn't know, but Yaping opened it with a smile, this is a blank paper, right? And it's an A4 piece of paper.

It was only when Yaping handed this A4 paper to him that he realized that this was not an ordinary A4 paper, and this text was printed on it, this was a resignation report, the madman smiled when he saw this, and then sat on the plastic stool next to the desk with this resignation report, and then picked up a cigarette and said: "What's the use of giving me a resignation report now?" It takes a month to resign in advance, and now it's less than a month before the New Year, so I'll write it next year, right? ”

But Yaping said directly: "You fill in now, tomorrow is your last day of work, and the day after tomorrow you can hand over the clothes label and leave, I will let the team leader arrange all this." ”

The cigarette in his hand had been lit at the moment, so he took a puff, he understood that Yaping was not joking with him at all, so he gritted his teeth and looked at the current Yaping, who was just holding her fluffy brown bear with a faint smile on her face, just like Fang Cai's words, which did not come from her mouth at all.

So he took the resignation report in his hand and fell into deep thought for the first time, is it really right to resign? to choose a job with a low salary, to do the unusual behavior of copying books that can't make money at all, and also told Yaping that he will definitely work very hard in the coming year and will definitely become an outstanding person? This is a big lie no matter how you think about it, right?

So, what do you do now? Distraught and smoking, he just can't pick up the pen that is close at hand, he understands that as long as he picks up the pen that is close at hand, he only needs to fill in the resignation report simply, which can realize his desire to miss day and night for the past few months, but I really don't know why, for the first time in my life, really for the first time, the first time I feel that the original pen will be so heavy.