[Julie's monologue]

I never thought my life would be linked to a mental hospital, but now, I'm trapped in this hospital.

What I think about the most every day is: Why is this happening?

Everything starts with the circle of friends I saw Zhao Yang.

Because of the subway construction in Los Angeles, Baima Hospital, where I was located, was wrapped in those pale blue iron sheets. Not to mention the patients, even the staff had to make a detour of a mile to enter the hospital.

Without patients, there is no profit, and without profit, there is no way to maintain the normal operation of a hospital.

Our wages were repeatedly compressed, and eventually turned into delays. All of them are finding their way, and I'm no exception.

During that time, I frantically contacted my friends who worked in the medical industry, and I made phone calls one after another, and all I got was perfunctory.

Zhou Wei told me not to worry, saying that it is a good thing for women to work more leisurely, and he is not unable to support me.

I'm tired of hearing these words, because Zhou Wei doesn't know how much I spend.

In the years I've been with him, I've been disguising myself. In front of him, I am a virtuous woman who is financially independent, has ideals, has pursuits, and can live. I will also think about him everywhere, and on the grounds that I am not married, I will not reach out and ask him for money. I know that the more sensible I am, the more he will give me.

Zhou Wei is not a very picky man, he just underestimated my ability to spend money.

He thought that giving me two or three thousand a month was enough, but as everyone knows, my expenses are twenty or thirty thousand every month.

In order not to lower my standard of living, in addition to going to work by myself, in addition to trying to ask Zhou Wei for subsidies, I also have to maneuver between multiple men, with quasi-girlfriends, extramarital lovers, blind dates and other roles to obtain more or less money from them.

You may find it tiring, but I'm enjoying it.

In the hearts of each of them, I am perfect.

I can fall in love with each of them to my heart's content, but I don't have to be responsible for their lives.

Of course, there are times when I show my stuff, but usually I choose to break up, with a reason that seems quite appropriate, such as: I don't deserve them, they deserve a better woman than me.

Zhou Wei's thoughtfulness did not warm my heart. On the contrary, because the hospital was not efficient, we began to take frequent holidays, and the holidays meant that I had to stay with Zhou Wei 24 hours a day.

I hate the feeling of living with a man all the time. Living together meant that I had to take on the part of the housework that belonged to the woman, and in order to maintain my virtuous tendencies, I had to do every housework well, and I had to coax the man well. I'm not a professional actor, and I can't stand acting every day.

Just when I was about to go crazy, I swiped Zhao Yang's circle of friends.

After inquiry, I learned that he worked in Song County and had already mixed up with the position of business director.

I began to approach him in a planned way, such as liking his circle of friends, caring about his daily life, and asking him out for dinner while he was off on the weekend, in the name of communicating work.

When a man starts to give up his guard against a woman, he can't help but talk about some family trivialities. As annoying as I am, I have to act like a listening interpreter. Then stand in his position at the right time and make some remarks that are in line with his mood and flattering him.

In just two months, my relationship with him has changed qualitatively.

He thinks I'm the woman who knows him best in the world, but I'm just providing him with his emotional needs.

After making sure that he would not refuse help at work, I offered to introduce me to a job, and I became his colleague and got a good salary.

Originally, I just wanted a job with a good salary, but when I arrived in Songxian, I found that he had a good relationship with the group leader, and I felt that his career future would not stop there, so I had a new goal, I wanted to turn him into one of my many boyfriends, and become one of the people I could choose in the future.

I spend all my time with him, and I give him whatever he wants. At work, I am his right-hand man. In life, I am his personal assistant. I would have thought of everything before him, and unsurprisingly, he fell in love with me.

In this way, I became a third person in his marriage.

thought that his relationship with his wife had broken down, as he said. But in fact, he has a good relationship with his wife. In order to further provoke the relationship between him and his wife, I began to retreat as advance, clearly breaking up with him, asking him to care more about his wife, but in fact, revealing our relationship to his wife, forcing his wife to go crazy first, so that their relationship between husband and wife collapsed directly and entered the divorce process.

He promised me that everything would be sorted out in December. But I can see that even though his wife is frequently angry, he is still reluctant to divorce, and continues to perfunctory me while avoiding his wife.

During that time, I became extremely anxious and tormented, because I had never experienced such a setback in my relationship life.

I began to toss his wife even harder, for example, deliberately calling his wife late at night, sending messages, sending ambiguous photos of me and him, screenshots of chats, etc. As a professional obstetrician and gynaecologist, I know that women who are breastfeeding are the most likely to have emotional breakdowns and are the most prone to extremes.

Sure enough, his wife began to threaten him with death, and this hysterical attitude made him start to stay away from his wife.

I didn't expect that his wife would really die, and I and him, because of this incident, entered a period of emotional torment.

Breaking up, scolding, blaming, complaining, reuniting, and supporting each other have become the norm in our lives, and what makes me even more uncomfortable is that I have to maintain my "understanding" illusion in front of him all the time, even if I am reprimanded by him, I have to pretend to be very generous.

I thought that as long as we survived that time, he and I would be able to start again, even if we were both unemployed, depending on his ability to work, we could start again in a different place.

But strange things happened, he and I began to see Nansheng's ghost, and we both began to be surrounded by those strange things. Now, for example, I don't know if the sounds I see or hear are real or false.

A month after I was admitted to the hospital, I was used to having emotional breakdowns and also getting used to insomnia.

Two months after I was admitted to the hospital, I began to take the initiative to cooperate with the doctors for psychological adjustment and take the medicine they asked me to take.

I thought that as long as I cooperated well, I would be able to get out of the hospital as soon as possible. As long as I get out of this hospital, my life can be reshuffled. But before I could be discharged from the hospital, my mom brought me the painful news that my daughter had been hurt by my former man.

Is this my retribution?

Is it the retribution that I wantonly interfered in other people's families and hurt other people's wives?

If it is retribution, why should it be retribution on my daughter.

She's just my daughter!

【Zhao Yang's monologue】

Nan Sheng is not dead, which is a thing to be happy about.

Even though she lied to me, I didn't hate her at all, and I felt that I deserved it.

If she hadn't lied to me, I would probably never have understood how an impromptu extramarital relationship can hurt a woman so completely.

She didn't die not because she didn't suffer enough damage, but because she had a big life and escaped from the ghost gate.

I went through the formal divorce process with her.

On the day of the divorce, we were like a couple of friends, and the whole process was pleasant, and we could even laugh and joke with each other.

But in my heart, she and I both understood that from now on, we were just familiar strangers.

After divorcing Nan Sheng, I started a new business, and for this business, I sold everything I could sell.

But God still didn't have mercy on me, and my car wash closed down after only half a year.

Not only did he lose all his money, but he also lost a lot.

When I brought those devices home, I saw my father's helplessness and my mother's rejection.

But I don't care anymore.

I got a new job and started working 9 to 5.

My salary package was poor, almost back to 10 years ago.

I still have insomnia because of the accumulated debts that make it difficult for me to breathe.

Midnight dreamed back, and I began to covet the days when I used to live with Nansheng.

I tried to message her and say I wanted to go home.

She replied to me: "If you want to go back, you can go back, you are still your parents' biological son." ”

She knew what it meant to go home, but she deliberately pretended not to understand.

My eldest son and I are very estranged, and most of the calls are confusing, and most of the messages are not answered.

My youngest son has little impression of me.

I don't know why I'm living my life the way it is.

I began to like to go back to my hometown, to be alone in the fields, to look at the graves that were left alone in the fields, and I began to imagine and fear the days of old age.

I was afraid of being alone, but I died and lived as a loner.

I had a wife, children, a house, a car, but in the end, it was gone!

Marriage is not easy, but it is important to cherish it!

This marriage