Zhao Hui has been studying in Yinchuan No. 2 Middle School for two months, and she goes to and from school on time every day, and her mood for studying is very calm. The teachers of Yinchuan No. 2 Middle School are very good, the teacher who teaches Chinese is Teacher Bai, who has taught Zhao Hui in Yinchuan No. 1 Middle School, and the teacher who teaches history is a part-time university teacher in Northwest No. 2 People's Academy.

Time passed day by day, and Zhao Hui suddenly felt that she hadn't seen Pan Haoming for a long time, and she missed Pan Haoming very much. During the holiday on October 1, Wang Lifang and Wang Yuna both said that Zhao Hui could not go to see Pan Haoming and should focus on studying.

What can Zhao Hui say? She always felt the presence of Pan Haoming, because he was in this small city, and every Sunday, she thought that he might come home.

One night, Zhao Hui had a dream, dreaming that she went to find Pan Haoming, his sister came to open the door, Pan Haoming saw her, didn't say anything, sent her out, asked her if she was riding, she said she didn't ride, she went to ride, Pan Haoming went back. She walked and walked, but got lost. In front of me was a vast wheat field, with rows of houses on either side of the ground a little higher on both sides. There was no road ahead of her, and she saw an old man doing work, and a girl her size squatting on the ground playing. She asked the old man how to go, and the old man pointed to the ridge and said, "Just go from that side." She walked along the ridge pointed by the old man, and as she walked, the ridge became narrower and narrower, and she thought: How can this go? She went in the opposite direction, out of the wheat field was a road, and there were a few shops on the side of the road, and she returned to the way she had come. On the way, she met Wang Lifang and Wang Yuna, and they went to the store together.

This dream made Zhao Hui change her mind to go to Pan Haoming, she thought: What's the use of me going to see him? I want to get encouragement from him, but if I don't work hard, it's useless for others to work hard. Only encourage yourself, restrain yourself, and rush towards the end of next year, and then I will go to him again! This is my own hope, and a strong hope can motivate me to study hard. Otherwise, if I go to him, I will miss him even more, and my mood will be unstable for a long time, and I may have to write a letter later, and if this development continues, it will inevitably affect my own learning. I shouldn't have gone to him, I love him, let this love stay quietly in my heart!

The next day, Zhao Hui had another dream, she dreamed that she was riding with Pan Haoming, and then her bicycle was lost, but Pan Haoming said that she didn't ride and didn't care about her. She went to look for a bicycle, and as she walked, there was a swamp and a lake in front of her, and she saw a wounded mouse, and she went to chase it, but the mouse, which fell into the water and never came up again. She met two more big black dogs, and someone said, "One is a wolf." "She dodged the wolves. Another dog was barking at her, and she ran away in fear and hid in a family in their village, and she also said her father's name, and her family lived in a small temple, but then she became one of the nuns in that temple, and she became a nun.

I woke up from the dream, it was terrible, it was too desolate, Zhao Hui thought: In the dream, did I really become a nun and regret that I had killed that little guinea pig? What does a guinea pig portend? Li Zhenguo is a rat, I'm so worried about him, he must not have anything happen, am I still in love with him? I wanted to say to him: I used to be like a fog to him, and when I couldn't see him, I thought of him, and used him to escape from the difficulties in learning. When I saw him, I felt bored, which showed that it was just an illusion for him. However, Poon is different, now I am thinking about him, and when I meet him, I know that I love him. Ay! Don't think about any nun, it's just a dream, I can't go to see Pan Haoming, I can't ruin my plan for a year, I have to give myself a year, don't be too stingy with myself, give yourself a year to do the most important thing for yourself, otherwise, I will fail again, and after the college entrance examination next year, I will definitely go to him.

On the afternoon of the third day, Zhao Hui went to school with Yang Ling, and Yang Ling said, "We won't go to school today, I don't want to go." Zhao Hui said: "Let's go!" If you don't go to school, the teacher will say it. Yang Ling said: "It's okay, the teacher doesn't say, we won't go today, it's not good to study too intensely, just play at my house this afternoon." ”

They watched TV and sang pop songs at Yang Ling's house, which was really happy. Zhao Hui was very happy, they all talked about their studies in junior high school and high school, in general, they studied very well in junior high school, but they regressed in high school.

Zhao Hui said abruptly: "When I came here from my hometown Beijing, it was like falling into a fog from reality. I have always been proud to be a Beijinger, but my study and life have always been unsuccessful, I seem to be detached from reality, pretentious, but I can't come up with successful things, I haven't learned how to live in the city, how to protect myself, so that I am always in a situation of failure. I am too self-pitying, I shrink my head and brain for what I do, I am as timid as a mouse, and I can't be generous. Yang Ling said: "You have to challenge life. Zhao Hui said: "Yes! In fact, what is there to be afraid of? Everyone is equal, everything will be fine after this year, and this year is a year of lying on the salary and trying the courage. I want to challenge myself not only to succeed in my life, but also to make myself truly confident in life, to live in this society with confidence, to strengthen my character, and to make my life complete. ”

This afternoon, Zhao Hui knew that Yang Ling was worth befriending, and she should be regarded as a true friend. Through the conversation with Yang Ling, Zhao Hui figured out the relationship between dreams and reality, dreams are also utopians, it is not advisable to find a strange world without according to their own conditions, and then there should be a clear view of the weaknesses of their character, self-pity, melancholy, sadness, these are not advisable, to make their thoughts and actions consistent, so that actions keep up with thoughts, dare to think and dare to do, harmonize.

Zhao Hui's tablemate is a handsome girl, named Zhang Qian, with a sports head and a melon seed face, she is an empathetic girl. A tall boy from another class often came to see her, and she said to Zhao Hui: "My male classmate is going to study in a Russian city, and his father has a factory there, so let me go with him." Zhao Hui said, "Oh! That's a great opportunity! Zhang Qian said: "I don't know if it's good there, I'm still thinking about whether to go or not." Zhao Hui let out an "oh" and said, "Yes!" Will you be able to adapt to the learning environment there? She smiled and said, "I have to learn Russian when I go, and I have to study university courses." Zhao Hui: "Russian is easy to learn, my mother used to learn Russian when she was in school. Zhang Qian said "um". A female classmate in the front row turned around, she was Zhang Qian's classmate, looked at Zhang Qian with a smile and said, "Think about it!" They told you to go to Russia and go to university together! Zhang Qian said embarrassedly: "Okay, aren't I thinking about it?" Zhao Hui said: "You go to Russia with him, do your father and mother agree?" Zhang Qian said: "I haven't told my father and mother yet!" Zhao Hui said: "The cost of living is high!" Tuition fees are high, right? Zhang Qian said: "His father said that we don't have to worry about living expenses and tuition fees. The female classmate in the front row said, "You should be engaged and go again, right?" You don't have to worry about living expenses and tuition fees? Zhang Qian smiled embarrassedly and lowered her head to the table.

One morning in English class, when the English teacher was talking about reading, she said to her classmates, "Hasn't anyone ever said something like this?" 'Give up what you can't get', that's what this reading means. It's the same in life, if you like something and you can't get it, you have to give it up. It's like if you like a piece of clothing, it's very expensive, and you don't have any money, so you just want to forget it, and don't buy it, or you'll always think about it, and you'll try to get money, or save money, or steal it, and it will bring you a lot of pain, so it's better to give up that dress. Also, if you like someone, you like him very, very much, you love him very, very much, but he doesn't love you anyway, what do you love for such a person? It's better to give up. Or would you still love him, and suffer for him, and die, and not live? The students laughed, and the teacher also smiled and said, "Maybe the teacher is too extreme, and the teacher is also emotional!" ”

Zhao Hui thought: The teacher is right, 'if you can't get what you can't get, you have to give up', why should you get along with yourself? I love Poon, but what do I get? It's loneliness, it's boredom, it's pain, it's indifference, I love him, I said to him frankly and clearly, 'I love you', but he never said he loves me to me, he always answered me with some vague words, such as 'it's impossible between the two of us', 'everything is not decided now', 'maybe there will be development between us', and he also said that he would no longer sing in front of girls, but that time I went to his house, he still sang the song "Whether". I have spent so much energy to love Pan Haoming, I am not a fickle person, I am so good to him, I give him so deep affection, but I can't judge whether he loves me or not in the future, but from now on every time I think of him, I have to say to myself: "I don't love you, I want to give up on you." "Yes, it can only be like this, there is not much time left before the college entrance examination, I want to force myself not to think about him, I want to give up on him, I have to focus on studying, study hard, and meet next year's college entrance examination.

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