When he came back and passed by the teaching building, Xiao Fan saw that a boy in their class seemed to be named Zhao Zixuan, wearing only a pair of shorts and taking a bath in the large vat used to hold washing water on the first floor. Xiao Fan immediately decided that even if he was punished, he would go to the commissary to buy a few bottles of mineral water.

Fortunately, Xiao Fan was not discovered along the way, and by the way, Xiao Fan also bought a pen and notebook, and he also had to participate in the art show, so that he could continue to have the opportunity to contact Jiani, and the most important thing was that he could be trained less.

In his previous life, when he was in college, Xiao Fan performed four sketches and one cross talk on stage in various large and small parties and competitions, don't underestimate the university's literary and artistic performances, at least Xiao Fan's Literature and Art Department of the Business School of China Normal University is definitely at a professional level, and the rehearsed sketch effect is not much worse than that of Big Bowl Entertainment. Like something, as soon as you take off your clothes and write two big characters behind you, this routine is all Xiao Fan and they play leftover.

However, because there are requirements for the number of people participating in the show (make a big chorus, the whole class does not need to train), so the sketch is not good, it can only be cross talk, so Xiao Fan found Liu Zhiyu. As soon as he heard that he could be lazy and train less, Liu Zhiyu immediately agreed.

"No, the accent here should be on the word 'good guy'. And here, 'red sandalwood', you have to raise the pitch. ”

"The expression is not cheap enough, then be cheaper, let you be cheap, not a sass."

"Here you pause for a moment before continuing."

"And here, if the audience laughs, you do it again."

For cross talk sketches, the script accounts for 30% and the performance accounts for 70%. So in the past few days, as soon as he has time, Xiao Fan has carried out special training for Liu Zhiyu, and for this performance, Xiao Fan also borrowed the head teacher's mobile phone to call and asked Xiao's mother to find someone to make two sets of coats and send them to the barracks.

Due to the lack of competition from language programs, Xiao Fan and Liu Zhiyu's cross talk successfully passed the pre-selection, and Yu Jiani's song also passed the pre-selection because it was self-created. Judging from the rehearsal effect, Xiao Fan's cross talk responded quite well.

However, because the content of this cross talk is a bit vulgar, Xiao Fan was worried that it would be too much, so he also prepared another show, solo street dance, but what Xiao Fan didn't expect was that both programs had passed.

On the morning of the last day of military training, the military training report performance is very formal, like turning left and backward during the march, these technical actions that ordinary students cannot touch in military training at all. In particular, if you turn backwards during the journey, it is easy to trip over yourself if you are not careful, or you will turn around and turn directly. This action alone, when it came to the show, there were two classes that were not neatly turned.

In the end, the results of the fourth class were not bad, and they won the third place overall.

In the afternoon, there was a theatrical performance, and a total of 16 programs were selected.

The first program was the instructor's chorus "We Are Soldiers". For Chinese soldiers, singing military songs is one of the professional skills, and singing is the kind of momentum that gives up on me, of course, this is not to say that Chinese soldiers are not good at other conveniences, it is necessary to understand them without sufficient conditions.

A total of twenty performers of the remaining fifteen shows are gathered backstage at the moment, and two are hosts, the female host is Meng Xuejiao from class 14, about 170, Xiao Fan can give a score of 80+. The male host is called Jian Zhichang, who is in the third class, tall and handsome.

In addition, there are five or six logistics personnel who are responsible for carrying props, pulling curtains, playing music and other dirty work, all of which are the worst ones in each class, who can't enter the queue phalanx completely by their own strength.

Xiao Fan naturally sat with Yu Jiani, and there was a big light bulb of more than 200 catties next to him.

"I'll go to the toilet again." This is the third time Liu Zhiyu has gone to the toilet in half an hour, and it can be seen that he is very nervous.

"I don't think you're nervous." Yu Jiani had performance experience before, so her mentality was okay at the moment, but she seemed to be more relaxed when she looked at Xiao Fan.

"Seven hundred, small scene." Xiao Fan is a crazy player, the more spectators and the bigger the scene, the better he will perform.

"Actually, you made up this song yourself, right?" A woman's intuition is terrifying, comparable to a weapon of cause and effect.

"You say yes, yes."

"You seem to have a lot of stuff."

The rehearsal was seen by Jiani. Strictly speaking, three of the sixteen programs in this art show are written by Xiao Fan, and they span the three major fields of singing, dancing, and language.

"I just know everything." This is indeed the biggest characteristic of Gemini, which is mixed but not refined.

"I think you'll be popular after this art show."

"So why don't you invest in advance while I'm still at the bottom of valuations?" Xiao Fan looked at Yu Jiani seriously.

"What to invest in?" As a result, Yu Jiani pretended to be confused and avoided it.

"Don't pretend to be confused!" Xiao Fandi's voice suddenly increased a few points.

"What am I pretending to be confused about?" Yu Jiani remembered that this was the line in Xiao Fan's cross talk.

"I'm memorizing my lines."

"This doesn't seem to be your line."

"A qualified actor, of course, has to memorize the lines of both parties A and B."

"Didn't you write this cross talk yourself?"

"Don't be confused." Xiao Fan was really powerless to refute.

"That's not my word!" Liu Zhiyu, who couldn't figure out the situation, happened to hear the last sentence when he came back from going to the toilet.

"Come on, let's do it again." After Xiao Fan finished speaking, he pulled Liu Zhiyu to the corner to talk to the lines.

"Isn't this kind of thing supposed to be the first thing for the boy to speak?" Yu Jiani muttered in a voice that only she could hear.

"In the second program, please enjoy the Latin dance performed by Wang Junjun of the seventh class of the year and Zheng Shengjie of the tenth class of the year."

The students of Caoyang High School are really Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, and they can't even pass the first class exam with ordinary singing and dancing.

This pair of go men and women cooperate tacitly, the dance steps are light and smooth, and the crotch twist is absolutely impossible to twist out of this level without ten years of skill.

"The following is Liu Zhiyu from the fourth class of the year"

"Xiao Fan."

"Performing cross talk "Going to the Toilet"."

Finally, it was Xiao Fan and Liu Zhiyu's turn to appear in the fifth program, which was the only language program in this theatrical performance. Originally, the teacher had an objection to this name, but he really couldn't think of other better and more suitable names, so he had to compromise.

"Liu Zhiyu, Xiao Fan came to the stage and bowed."

"Oops, oops, oops."

After the two bowed and got up, Liu Zhiyu covered his stomach with one hand and covered half of his face with the other, and then groaned while squeezing his facial features together in pain, seeing bursts of laughter from this scene. This kind of burden often appears in cross talk sketches, commonly known as foreign appearance, which is to amuse the audience by pretending to be strange and ugly, which belongs to a relatively low-end direct burden. Either the ugly cross talk sketches are generally popular, and the handsome ones shake this kind of burden is against the harmony.

"What's the situation, constipation, you!" Xiao Fan pulled Liu Zhiyu.

"How do you know, if you have a remote control installed inside me, ah no, a bug/listener. Ah no, monitors. ”

Liu Zhiyu suddenly got up and pointed sideways at Xiao Fan and said, his tone and tone were all imitating Yue Yunpeng.

The burden of pretending to make a slip of the tongue also sounded, and Liu Zhiyu's cheap appearance added a lot of points, and the scene was full of laughter.

"What kind of monitor am I pressing in your place? I don't study E. coli. ”

There was still scattered laughter.

"Oops, I haven't had a tuba in five days." Liu Zhiyu began to repeat the action he had just done in pain.

"Why not!"

"The food doesn't have oil and water, so it's not a big deal."

This sentence complained about the army's food, which sparked a deep resonance among the students in the audience.

"Then I'll buy you some soybean oil to drink." Xiao Fan thought to himself, in fact, this place is suitable for yogurt advertising.

"Nasty, alas! Don't say that I really felt a little bit yesterday, but I didn't go to the toilet. ”

"Why didn't you go in? Crowded? ”

"That's a lot of people, good guys, let tens of thousands of flies push me out." Liu Zhiyu staggered, and throughout this paragraph, his tone and movements were imitating Yue Yunpeng.

"Huh" Xiao Fan said.

There was a lot of laughter in the audience. The toilets of the Lei Patrol Regiment are dry toilets, and the sanitary conditions are very poor, so who really knows who will go.

"Hey, speaking of which, do you know what you have to bring to the toilet in the countryside in winter?" Liu Zhiyu began to imitate Guo Degang again.

"What to bring? Bring paper. ”

"No, there's paper in the toilet."

"What's that going to bring?"

"With a stick!"

Liu Zhiyu picked up the folding fan on the table and pinned it to his waist like a samurai with a knife, and walked back and forth on the stage majestically, occasionally waving his hand to the stage as he walked.

"Hey,, what's."

The audience burst into laughter again.

"It's winter, outside, it's not cold!" Liu Zhiyu said after walking back to his place.

"Well, what's wrong then." Xiao Fan imitated Yu Qian's cute and confused expression.

"Don't be confused." Liu Zhiyu pointed at Xiao Fan with a fan and said solemnly.

"What am I pretending to be confused?"

"It's too cold, and then after you do that, won't you freeze, he won't fall."

Liu Zhiyu also gestured the thickness with his hand. At this time, some people below had already guessed what was going on and began to laugh, and it was the kind of goose cry that couldn't stop.

"Choke!"

Liu Zhiyu imitated the sound of drawing a sword in his mouth, made a sword drawing movement in his hand, held a fan, and slammed it behind him.

Seeing this, the audience erupted in the warmest and most sustained laughter of the game. Taking advantage of this time, Liu Zhiyu repeated the action just now. Liu Zhiyu's repetitive action triggered a new round of laughter, and many acting seniors have expressed the high-level and importance of repetition in public.

"Next time, change your hand and hit it that way, don't hit me, it's a little dirty," Xiao Fan said after his laughter weakened a little.

Liu Zhiyu pinned the fan back to his waist and strode the meteor horizontal knife back and forth, and also lifted the coat, which once again caused laughter.

"Don't fall into the pit again."

"Later, I paid attention to it, and I squatted here to compare." Liu Zhiyu continued after returning.

"Compared to what?"

"What are you doing with this stick?" ，

"Oh, than the material."

"I'm from Limu."

"Isn't that a waste of things!"

"What are you doing, I'm from red sandalwood."

"Hey, this good wood is all used here."

"I'm ivory."

"Huh?"

"I'm gold-plated."

"Wow!"

"You see that my gilded one still has Xiao Fan's head engraved on it, and his mouth is still open."

"you."

"Liu Zhiyu, Xiao Fan. Get off the stage and bow. ”

Behind this cross talk, there is also a small baggage, which caused the audience to laugh continuously, and finally Xiao Fan and Liu Zhiyu walked off the stage in the warm applause of everyone.

The front of this cross talk was created by Xiao Fan himself, and the back copied Guo Degang Yu Qian's classic track "with a Stick".