"So, now?"

Sakakihara Le, who was straddled by her, stared straight at her beautiful face, her calm eyes that were as clear as the blue sky.

July?

Wrong.

July shouldn't be here.

If July is here, it means that it has always been July when you are on the plane with you.

When I came to the UK, I said that I wanted to go to Maple Avenue to see, care about myself, and accompany myself to visit the attractions of London, which was also July.

The fundamental problem is not in her appearance, but in all the performances of Tianhai Jiuliuli in this day!

If July can even imitate these so that he can't see the flaws, then it is inevitable-

"Too exaggerated?"

Through Sakakihara's eyes, Tianhai Jiu Ruri seemed to see through his thoughts. She stretched out her hand, propped her hands on the sides of his head, leaned over to look at him, still maintaining that unwavering expression, "Brother forgot so quickly?" Or do you have a bad memory, I remember I said, if I seriously disguised myself as an older sister, even my father would not be able to see the difference between us. ”

“.” Sakakihara didn't take the initiative to speak, just looked back into her eyes.

This sentence was said in July, a long time ago.

"That being said, how can I be sure it's not Ruri you're pretending to be July?"

Tianhai Jiu Liuli smiled again, "Le Jun is a little smarter, he knows that he has started to question me with my words Well, indeed, if something can't be judged, it's also a way to ask the person who asked the question." Yes, maybe I'm Liuli, deliberately testing Lejun to recognize me or not. ”

Sakakihara is somewhat disordered.

She spoke in the tone of Liuli's speech, but the content was something that only Liuli could say to herself.

It's the same as the interaction she had with herself at the door of the hotel just now.

"I still don't believe you're July."

"Don't believe me? Lejun, according to it? Facts always need some basis~"

"Actions, words, tone, micro-expressions."

"Lejun, these can actually be disguised." Tianhai Jiu Liuli replied, deliberately lowering his voice a little, and his gaze dodged for a moment, "Why, Le Jun doesn't accept reality.?" ”

Sakakihara closed his eyes, and he admitted that he couldn't tell if it was Ruri or July in front of him.

If it was at the door of the hotel just now, he would have assumed that it was Liuli. That kind of shy and timid, and a little angry, but not really angry, is not something that can be disguised. If July can really disguise it, Sakakihara can only admit that this is the genius of their twins.

However, there is no lack of falsification.

Sakakihara turned over hard and pressed Tianhai Jiu Liuli back on the hotel bed.

Her head rested on the pillow, her hands were open outward, facing upwards, and the two pairs of white thighs with only a pair of shorts were tightly tucked inward.

Her expression at this time was the usual faceless one in July.

The tone was also cold.

"Annoyed and angry? Started using violence against me? ”

"I think you're thinking too much."

Sakakihara stared straight into her eyes, reached out and put it on her waist, and then lifted the thin pajamas on her to look at it, and he saw-

The white belly was white and pure.

Really.

It's July.

Sakakihara Le suddenly looked back at the past, leaned over, faced the face, and the force of suppressing her hands couldn't help but increase a lot, he frowned and asked:

"When? What about scars? ”

"I tear it off after taking a shower, and it's uncomfortable to wear."

“.”

"What, I'm not welcome? I don't know who still wants to take the initiative to take care of me, and has been saying good things to me. ”

"Obviously, it's not welcome."

Tianhai Qiming ignored his answer, even if he was pressed under him, he still had that expressionless face, "Talking with a straight face, still working so hard, aren't you tired?" ”

Sakakihara only thought it was funny, "Compared to these, some people say to Ruri that they will treat me as air in their lives, but they still chase me all the way to the UK and make such a deception." ”

Tianhai Qimingyue: "Do you think I want to come?" If it weren't for my sister begging me all the time, and even the fact that you were accompanying her in England, do you think I would be willing to see you guy again and listen to you say so many useless things? ”

Good. Good. Good.

Hearing this, Sakakihara was 100% sure that she was July.

Sakakihara was incredulous to be able to say those words on the doorstep of the hotel. The glass that said those things that made him a little unbearable would actually be pretending to be July.

"Feel bad about being deceived? Do you think that those words that can obviously become your inner pillar collapse in an instant, and your heart is very blocked? Brother, don't you understand this kind of emotion? ”

"Huh."

Sakakihara felt even more ridiculous, and did not avoid her gaze at all, and the force of suppressing her hands increased a lot, "I don't know who thinks my heart-to-heart words are annoying." If you don't agree, why should I sympathize with you at this time? ”

"Do I reject your idea of comparing hearts to hearts? I've always just asked you to reach more people less, to use your overflowing compassion less. ”

"I didn't? Am I having casual contact with other people? ”

"Isn't it snow?"

"The snow is the same as you! July! Sakakihara raised his voice slightly.

"What is the same? You want to accept more women, I as your girlfriend, supervise you, and ask you to correct it, shouldn't you? ”

Sakakihara regained her composure, let go of her suppressed hands, and closed her eyes in front of her, "Sure enough, you still haven't realized what I said about you and Yuki's similarities. What do you deny about me as a human being? ”

"Is it wrong to let you converge?"

"That's right. In my previous answer, I also admitted my mistake. ”

"Then why not correct it? Why do you even want to bring the snow to your side? ”

"I don't want to repeat it, July. It's very simple, Zhixue still needs me, and no one has ever been willing to give her a correct guidance. It's the same as if no one ever really cared about you, and I wanted to respond to you. ”

"You know that there won't be someone behind the snow who can give her the right guidance?"

Sakakihara felt funny, left her, sat on the edge of the bed and turned his back to her, "Then why did you bother with me in the first place, it is not impossible to have someone who will be good to you in the future." Why do you still want to get entangled in me after I have rejected so many times? Coercion, threats, pleading. Isn't it good for you to be a good sister of Liuli? Why do you still come to me and want me to be responsible for your feelings? ”

The quarrels and arguments are endless, and neither of them can convince anyone with a word.

Even Sakakihara himself realized that he was settling old accounts with July, turning over past mistakes again and again, blaming the other party, and trying to completely refute the other side in terms of "correctness".

After the argument came to the back, Sakakihara was big, and he reached out to hold his head.

Try to suppress the feelings of depression in your heart. Full of exhaustion.

"That's enough. Enough for July. I don't want to quarrel with you anymore."

"Throw in the towel?"

Sakakihara looked at her face again, and there was no expression on her face, whether it was her or herself.

"In July, I'm tired enough of my life."

"What, meaning you don't want to be responsible?"

"Where do you see that I don't want to be responsible? It's that we can't get along now, I can't be responsible, our philosophy of life is no longer compatible, and you can't agree with what I'm doing now, I'm tired of dealing with your rejections again and again, tired. Normal, isn't it? ”

“.”

At this time, Tianhai Qi Mingyue did not speak, and she noticed that Sakakihara Le's back suddenly seemed to be more than ten years old, full of fatigue.

"Tell me what you came to me for."

"I said it because my sister begged me. I'm going to hear you myself. ”

"So what if you listen to it now?"

"Nothing."

"yes, it's nothing," Sakakihara got up, went to the couch to pick up his clothes and put them on, and draped his coat over his shoulders, "After all, you were just forced by Ruri to come and meet me, why would you want to meet me?" ”

Sakakihara pulled his coat on his chest and glanced back at the seven bright moons of the sky sitting on the bed.

"Just like what I just said. If you want to say that I am wrong, how can I not be wrong? Of course I know I made mistakes. The thing that really makes me angry is always that you choose to deny me as a person, you know it yourself, right? Trust with all your heart that someone understands you, supports you, and encourages you to move forward. In the end, it is up to this person to deny himself, what kind of mood will he have. That day, I knew how Ruri felt when she heard her aunt say those words. ”

Tianhai Qi Mingyue saw him zip up his coat, and took away his mobile phone and wallet, and asked, "Why did you say those words to me that day?" ”

Sakakihara was inexplicably silent for three seconds, walked at the door of the hotel bedroom, didn't look at her, and smiled, "What else can there be?" It's just because you denied me, I hate you. ”

Sakakihara left alone.

Walking alone on the streets of a foreign country, seeing unfamiliar people, walking on unfamiliar roads, looking at the unfamiliar bricks and tiles under your feet.

Sometimes he looked up at the black sky, and sometimes he looked sideways at the citizens and tourists walking in front of Starbucks

He kicked the Coke cans that were everywhere under his feet, and he only felt that it was a lie for the Japanese to say that the streets of England were all neat and beautiful.

It's the same everywhere in this world, and there's good and bad everywhere.

Just like July, who just quarreled with himself, there are good and bad.

I'm all hiding under the "good" skin, useless bad, right?

Even the words I heard today were disguised as Liuli in July to deceive himself.

As he walked, Sakakihara came to the banks of the River Thames, and next to the top left was the British landmark Clock Tower, also known as Elizabeth Tower.

He crouched on the bank, and instead of looking at the bell tower of the civilized world, he stared quietly at the surface of the Thames, which had no features.

I waited quietly for a long time, and suddenly I wanted to find someone to talk to. So I contacted Ah Ling.

I made an international call, but I was hung up before I could answer it.

Probably, she's still busy.

I found the phone number of Xuexue again, but it was never connected.

According to the time calculation, probably. She had only been out for a short time and was playing basketball in the park next to her apartment.

There were actually quite a few people playing during the day, and two days before she left, Sakakihara had already seen her learn to play with strangers.

Sakakihara Le wants to find Ruri. I remembered that Liuli's mobile phone was in July's hand.

turned around and tried to find July's account again, but found that July had already deleted his contact information

"Isn't that good, everyone?"

After a moment of silence, Sakakihara laughed out loud on the riverside.

Ah Ling took the initiative to hang up the phone, indicating that she was busy with her own career.

Zhixue didn't answer the phone, which means that she also has someone to play with her.

Liuli didn't come to the UK with her, which means that she can be independent a long time ago, and she doesn't care about this agreement with herself at all, so she gave the opportunity until July.

July?

Not to mention!

I quarreled with myself just now, and I was busy with her company and living her own life a while ago, and I was so good that I was autonomous!

What do you need to worry about?

Mom, I'm traveling the world with my uncle.

Well. It's good, it's all good.

Sakakihara smiled and smiled, looked down, and with the weak street lamp beside him, he saw his own reflection in the river fluctuating.

He stared at his face, which was gradually converging until it was completely calm. It was as if I saw another shadow.

One. A face that I should have forgotten a long time ago.

A face that no one remembers from the previous life.

Sakakihara was completely silent.

What is this life for me?

In my previous life, I was used to being lonely, and no matter what I did, I sang to myself, encouraged myself, and told myself to work hard.

If you work hard, you will definitely win the competition, but the truth is, no one cares how hard you try, everyone, the audience, just look at the results.

On the Internet and in reality, negative emotions are constantly transmitted to yourself, and all these voices can be bearable, and you can also blame all your mistakes on not working hard enough.

It is appropriate to bear these negative emotions because of the lack of strength.

It is also appropriate to bear the insults, because it did not meet everyone's expectations of "definitely first" and won the first place in the competition.

These negative emotions can be tolerated.

But if you are used to staying in this mood, you will inevitably look forward to it, you will fantasize, and you will imagine that there is a person in front of you who is different from everyone else, and is willing to give yourself infinite light in times of suffering, a person with infinite care and warmth. To look forward to the little light that I have seen in my gloomy life.

It's a pity that there have been no such characters in the previous life, and some are just boring endings of being shot to death by the river.

I can be sure that I haven't asked my parents about my life for a long time, and I won't hold any funeral for my unexpectedly born son.

Well, it's miserable.

This life is good, I have a real family in this life, and I have a sister who can hold her legs and call her brother.

This kind of kindness and warmth that I have never experienced made me swear when my father ran away that I had never met that kind of person who was full of infinite light and warmth in my previous life, so I would do this kind of person to let my sister and mother no longer experience the indifference I felt in my previous life.

I want to help everyone and my family.

I have to start as an ordinary person, work hard and work hard. Let my sister know that she still has her brother in front of her, and let my mother know that there is a son at home who is working hard to live with everyone.

This mood thoughts. It has continued to this day.

And because of these thoughts, the people around them lead to July, Ruri, Suzu, and Snow they. All of them have been hurt by themselves.

Strictly speaking, everyone is not wrong, what is wrong is that everyone wants a relationship that can be 100% responsible after the light is shining.

Yes, there's nothing wrong with everyone.

It's me who is wrong, and I can't put 400% of my energy into taking care of them perfectly, and handling them harmoniously and harmoniously.

It's your fault.

Sakakihara suddenly stood up in front of the Thames, took two breaths of the cool night breeze, and silently stared at the icy surface of the rippling water.

"That's it, want to end?"

Suddenly, a call came, and Sakakihara didn't have to think about it to understand who was standing behind him.

"What do you follow me?"

"Just wanted to see what you wanted to do. Now it seems that the guess is still good. ”

Sakakihara closed his eyes and responded calmly, "Thought I was going to jump into the river." You think I'm too vulnerable, not because of this, but just because I want to leave and don't want to see you again. ”

"Hard-mouthed."

"Heh, everyone is qualified to say that about me, but you were the only one who was squatting in front of Tokyo Bay."

"Heh, I didn't think about it that way."

Sakakihara turned his head and looked straight back at the eyes of the Seven Bright Moons of the Heavenly Sea, "The mouth is hard." ”

"Alas"

A sigh suddenly sounded behind Tianhai Qimingyue, and another flaxen-colored long-haired girl wearing the white dress during the day sighed and walked out, her eyes swept over the two of them, and she said unhappily, "It's really harder than the other. In July, wouldn't it be better for you to soften your attitude towards Lejun? ”

Tianhai Qi Mingyue looked back at her sister, "Why?" I'm not wrong where I said. ”

You don't disagree with what Lejun said. Why are you so hard-mouthed? ”

Tianhai Jiu Ruri hung the hair that was blown away by the riverside wind behind his ears, looked at Sakakihara Le in front, and tried to explain: "Lejun too, what do you do with a hard mouth?" Obviously I still care so much about July. ”

Sakakihara saw the two of them appear together, and although he had doubts, he didn't want to ask at all.

"I just hate her."

"I know, I know, Lejun hates her the most."

Tianhai Jiuliuli suddenly pinched Tianhai Qimingyue's arm and motioned for her to step forward and speak by herself.

Although Tianhai Qi Mingyue looked very dissatisfied, after her sister glared at her, she still stepped forward extremely reluctantly.

"I-actually-very-"

"Oh, July actually wants to ask Lejun a question for you. She didn't want to admit it in her heart, but what Ke Lejun did was particularly in line with this psychology. ”

“.” Tianhai Qimingyue's face was much more embarrassed.

Seeing that Sakakihara didn't move, Tianhai Jiu Liuli had no choice but to take the initiative to speak, clear his throat, and raise his voice:

"Lejun, in fact, as soon as July heard me about your recent situation, he was anxious to come to the UK with me! It's not that I strongly asked her to come over, and she lied to you again! ”

Tianhai Qi Mingyue held her forehead awkwardly, "What is my sister talking nonsense, it's not like that at all." Besides, isn't my sister going to have to pull me in? When I heard that I was going to come to England with this guy, I was so angry that I didn't want to talk to your sister at that time. ”

What? Isn't that what it is? ”

"Not really, okay. Sister, you go down, I will go myself. ”

I don't believe it. You're going to have to quarrel again. ”

"I try not to talk about him."

"July, you said oh, promised."

"Guaranteed."

The two muttered for a long time, and Sakakihara just waited without any emotional fluctuations, until Tianhai Qimingyue was pushed in front of him by her sister with extreme reluctance, and the two of them were under the bell tower, watching face to face.

(End of chapter)