As soon as Xu Dawei walked down the embankment, he saw a female tourist standing on the Wanlang Bridge, she lowered her head, leaned over the stone railing, and carved something gently and intently. As soon as the sky dawned, the thick fog barrier on the water surface had not yet dispersed, and the three mountains of Taihu Lake were dimly revealing phantom-like outlines. Occasionally, there was one or two sounds of fish beating in the water, which was also lazy and dull.

He was going to go to the Wanlang Bridge. Yesterday, on a group tour, he came to this bridge for the first time, and his heart moved, feeling that he had seen this bridge. This is the first time in his life that he has been to Taihu Lake. Where and when have you seen it? But I do think I've seen it.

Now there are people on the bridge, and they are single women, and it is so early that it is inconvenient to go up again. He stopped, intending to turn back to the shore, when the woman heard the voice, turned her face, was a little startled at first, then smiled, and said politely, "You are early." ”

It's not good to go back. He wandered up to the bridge, and replied with a smile: "You are so interested that you are earlier than me." Slowly approaching her, stepping down the stone steps from the other end. In the blink of an arm, he saw that this was a foreign tourist. But among the people from abroad, he was very simple, wearing a short black vest, and a little cosmetics were used on his fair face, exuding a faint fragrance. Her hair was loosely bunned. Xu Dawei couldn't help but look back again. The female guest had already straightened up, and was raising her hand to put a hairpin in her hair, and when she saw Xu Dawei turning around, she said politely: "Comrade, if I ask you to accompany me for a while, you won't be surprised." ”

Xu Dawei's face showed puzzlement and suspicion.

"I was going to come alone to enjoy the lake. So I didn't ask my companion to accompany me, I asked him to pick me up later. But just now, all of a sudden, I suddenly felt a ......."

"Afraid?"

"No, it's loneliness."

Xu Dawei nodded and returned to the bridge, the female guest's smile became innocent and childish due to her reserve.

"You're so nice!"

Xu Dawei's heart moved. He felt that he had seen and heard this smile and this tone. It was the first time in his life that he had come into contact with someone from abroad, where and when had he seen her? But I do think I've seen it.

He said, "You really came too early."

"My passport has expired, and after a while my companion will come, and we will go straight to Shanghai to board the plane, and I only have this time."

"Am I not disturbing you here?"

"Not at all. Some tourists come here and are satisfied just to see the scenic spots. But I wanted to listen and talk to all kinds of people in the language that I was used to as a child, and it was a pleasure for me. ”

"I'm sorry, I'm not a talkative person."

"You can always listen to me, right? Listen to me speak Chinese to you! You speak Chinese all day long, I don't think it's new, but I want to find an opportunity to speak in Chinese, and I have to pay for the travel fee, and I am very grateful for you to give me a chance to gossip. ”

"You've probably lived abroad for too long."

The woman did not answer. She looked at the distance of Taihu Lake, frowned slightly, and her eyes were a little sad. Xu Dawei found that she was not as young as he originally estimated, at least forty-five or sixteen years old. The female guest seemed to realize that she was a little out of shape, shook her head slightly, and laughed again. And Xu Dawei could see that although he was laughing, there were tears shining in the corners of his eyes. She said:

"Shall we take a walk? It's a little chilly here. ”

Xu Dawei nodded. But she didn't go right away, she looked out of the railing, leaned down, and carefully peeled off a patch of green moss. Then he took out an autumn-colored handkerchief, wrapped it, and gently lifted it in his hand, and then walked under the bridge.

"I have a rockery. You can stick it on and it will live. ”

They walked along the shore of the lake and told him about the homesickness of overseas Chinese and the friendship between Chinese people. No matter how many people are at the meeting, as long as there are two Chinese at the same time, they will find each other, find each other, and then talk about family life as if no one else is around. Instead of taking a photo of the Great Wall or an oil painting of the Beihai Sea, a tourist advertisement advertised for the Chinese can spark a rush to register. The woman's father ran a bookstore, and at the urging of his daughter, they opened a counter for selling Chinese books and newspapers, and the woman took care of this counter herself, and she always promoted her goods to customers who came to buy any book, and every time she sold it was a propaganda speech, so people named her bookcase "Competitive Table". But this "competitive selection table" was a loss of money, because more was given away than sold, and her father had to put all the part of her business in the account book into the expenditure column.

Just as he was talking happily and listening attentively, the sound of cars behind him was near. A light gray Shanghai car pulled up to the side of the road.

"My companion, a writer who specializes in travelogues, I worked as a translator for him temporarily, and he paid for my travel."

The tall, lanky travelogue writer got out of the car door, stood up, and made a witty gesture to him, and the female guest said a long list of English to him, and he stretched out his hand to Xu Dawei and said, "Thank you, you have made my colleague have a happy morning." Let's hope she didn't sell you her books. She sells me a copy every day, and in a few days, her counter will be all mine. ”

The female guest smiled and finished translating his words, and they shook hands and said goodbye. He didn't understand the habits of foreign countries, but he was quite satisfied that he didn't introduce each other's names, and when they met, they didn't have to ask their names.

The car turned around the corner of the Turtle Head Zhu Mountain and was out of sight. It was still early, Xu Dawei walked and unconsciously returned to Wanlang Bridge. The bridge was empty, and the mist still remained on the water. The lake was calm, except for a ripple that floated to the shore and made a sigh-like sound. It's as if nothing had ever happened. It's like a funny dream. To confirm that it was true, he went up the stone steps again, to the place where the woman had stood, and leaned down to look at the moss marks that had been removed. There was a clear mark on the stone railing. Looking at it, looking at it, I suddenly found that on the large patch of green moss connected with the mark, there was a thin handwriting carved on it, which was English. He remembered the gesture of the woman leaning over the bridge and carving and pinching the hairpin on her head. I read those English words curiously. He had only learned English on the radio for a few days, and he had long since forgotten all of it, but he still knew the letters, so he read them letter by letter. After reading it, he felt as if he had learned this sentence, but not like he had learned it on the radio. He read it again, and still didn't understand. After reading it for the third time, he suddenly understood, and he felt the nerves in his whole body tense! These are the names of two people spelled in English, one is called Xiao Shumei, and the other is Xu Dawei - it is himself!

The name Xiao Shumei, he has long been unfamiliar. What I can recall now is only a fragmentary impression, and it doesn't seem like a fact, but like a wisp of emotion, a breath, a hint of taste.

When he was thirteen years old, he worked as a correspondent in the New Fourth Army, and was an entertainment activist and amateur actor. During the performance of the military art troupe, a boy who played the "new little cow" was sick, no, it was a gun that went off and was injured. But the soldiers shouted vigorously from the audience to see the "little herd cattle". The art troupe borrowed him to temporarily replace the injured actor, and when he arrived at the art troupe, they handed him over to a girl named Xiao Shumei, this little girl was the same year as him, but she was much more generous than him, and led him hand in hand to the wheat straw stack facing the sun, and sat on the ground to teach him the lyrics of "Little Cattle". He memorized the words in one morning. After lunch, the director came to rehearse for them, the play was not long, Xu Dawei had seen it before, and it was rehearsed twice, so it was almost the same. Before going on stage, they first rehearsed inside the art troupe. After the performance, everyone applauded vigorously, Xu Dawei was ashamed and frightened, Xiao Shumei was the only one here who he knew, so he turned his eyes to Xiao Shumei as if asking for help. Xiao Shumei smiled, so innocent (hell, no wonder I felt like I had seen that smile somewhere).

The art troupe toured in various troupes for a month, and then handed Xu Dawei to Xiao Shumei to take care of, except for Xu Dawei and gay men when he was sleeping, he followed Xiao Shumei the rest of the time behind him, Xiao Shumei made a basin of water when washing his face, and the two washed at the same time, and Xiao Shumei led Xu Dawei to the lesbian group during dinner and told him to sit next to her and eat. What about the march. Even though it was a column, the two of them were allowed to walk side by side, so that they could talk to each other as they went.

Children get along with each other faster than adults, and they get to know each other faster. Xiao Shumei asked Xu Dawei's family, history. Xu Dawei said that he didn't have parents since he was a child, he grew up with his grandmother, his grandmother died, and the New Fourth Army passed by to take him in. Xiao Shumei said that her father was in business in the United States, and her family was a landlord and capitalist — and when she said the word landlord and capitalist, there was nothing unnatural or ashamed at all, as if she were talking about someone else. She lived with her grandfather, and when she returned to her hometown for the summer vacation, the New Fourth Army came to their village to promote anti-Japanese resistance and national salvation. His uncle was going to join the New Fourth Army and told his grandfather to lock him in the house. At night, she called her uncle in front of the door, and her uncle whispered to her: "Mei girl, help your uncle open the door!" ”

"Grandpa said he wasn't allowed to open it!"

"Grandpa is an old fool. It's a good thing to join the New Fourth Army, if you don't go to resist Japan, China will die! The country is dead, and even your little girl is taken as a slave! What is a slave, do you know? The Japanese walk and ask you to carry him on his back, and when he is tired, he tells you to lie on the ground, and he sits on your back and eats wine! ”

"I don't have the key!"

"I have, I'll give it to you through the window."

Xiao Shumei let go of her uncle, and her uncle ran away from the back door, and when she ran out of the village, she heard footsteps behind her, and when she looked back, it turned out that the little girl had also followed.

"Go back, what are you doing here?"

"I'm going to be the New Fourth Army with you!"

"That's an adult's business, you kid can't go."

"Oh, slaves want children, but the New Fourth Army doesn't want children, I'm going!"

"No way!"

"If you don't take me, I'll shout, I'm afraid that grandpa won't be able to catch up with you!"

Xiao Shumei followed his uncle to become the New Fourth Army.

"Yo, you're still a big lady!" Xu Dawei said, "I think you can endure hardships." ”

"What a bitterness! The chief doesn't put on a grandfather's show, his opinions are raised, and his jokes are also told, all of them are comrades. When the young lady was called back, my grandfather always led me to pay respects. Either kowtow to this father or pay birthday to that mother-in-law, and then stand aside and pretend to be a mud bodhisattva, I can't speak, I can't laugh, I can't laugh, I have a bitter come! ”

She walked into the army as her uncle's little tail, and now she has her own little tail. She wanted to lead the little tail onto the stage, and she was glad about it, and did it as a serious thing.

But the little tail is stronger than her.

After marching after a play, she walked a mile or two, and found that her little diary had been lost backstage. There are a few little pictures of her beloved. She didn't dare to ask to go back and look for it, for fear that the whole team would stop for this and be criticized by everyone. And he secretly shed tears.

Xu Dawei asked her, "What's uncomfortable?" Feet blistered? ”

She whispered that she had told him her secret. In this way, she found that her little tail had fallen behind during the break.

They asked her, "Didn't you lead him?" How did you lose it? ”

She lowered her head and said with a cry: "When he passed through that bamboo forest, he said that he was going to relieve his hands." ”

The captain sent someone to unload the horse stack, rode on the horse to look for it, and found it after half an hour, saying that he had met him in front of the acting village. Xu Dawei said: "I walked out of the bamboo forest and ran back along the original road." Everyone laughed helplessly. The captain said, "Shumei, untie one of the leggings and tie Xiao Xu to your backpack belt!" ”

When he was back on the road, Xu Dawei stuffed a small notebook into Shumei's hand in the dark shadow, and whispered: "Stupid thing, you can only cry!" Shumei took his hand and didn't let go, and replied, "You're stupid, what if you can't catch up with the team?" ”

"When you are a communicator, you won't be able to catch up with the team?"

"You're so nice!"

(No wonder I've heard this tone!) ）

The water town of northern Jiangsu, the exchange between the river and the Han, is full of single-plank bridges. Xiao Shumei's legs trembled when she saw this kind of bridge. He pulls her from the front, helps her from the back, helps her carry her backpack, and carries props. complained and said:

"Don't even dare to cross the bridge, what kind of soldier!"

"It's also called a bridge? Look at our bridge in Wuxi! Wooden, stone, bowed, there is a bridge over ten thousand waves in Taihu Lake, which looks ...... in the moonlight"

(Days!) No wonder I think I've seen this bridge! ）

After a month of performance, before leaving, Shumei dismantled and washed Xu Dawei's padded jacket, and sewed a snow-white collar on his padded jacket. When he returned to the army, everyone said that he had become clean and elegant after a month's work, and he had learned a lot of intellectuals. Someone else joked: "Why didn't you bring back your little cowherd girl to be your daughter-in-law?" Xu Dawei blushed and punched the man a few times, but he remembered Xiao Shumei in his heart. It's like I've lost something, and I can't keep up my spirits for a long time.

Two years later, in the Yimeng Mountains, the troops passed outside the village where the art troupe was stationed, Xu Dawei went to the regiment to take a look, everyone enthusiastically pulled him and said this and that, a naughty ghost shouted: "Shumei, Shumei, your shepherd boy brother is here, why are you hiding from the clip?" ”

People laughed and dodged the air, it turned out that Shumei was hiding behind people, blushing, smiling, and growing a lot taller. She shook hands with Xu Dawei, just looked at him and smiled, and didn't say anything. The team was marching, and after a few jokes, Xu Dawei ran to catch up with the team, and Shumei caught up with him and said:

"Shall I write later?"

After the Battle of Laiwu, Xu Dawei wrote a letter to Shumei, saying that it was all about the war, but he never replied. During the Huaihai Campaign, when he was resting in the trenches, a platoon leader took a handful of letters to distribute them one by one, and finally left a letter and asked loudly: "Who do you guess this letter is?" ”

The new soldier in the class, Gong Erbao, just got married, but he didn't get the letter, everyone said that it was Wang Erbao's, Wang Erbao blushed and lowered his head. But the platoon leader opened the letter and read aloud: "Brother Shepherd Boy, hello ......" Suddenly the trench was like a 60 cannonball, and they all laughed at Xu Dawei. Xu Dawei snatched the letter from the platoon leader, put it in his arms and went to the bullet shelter. He didn't read the letter, he only felt that his face was full of fever, as if someone had exposed an ugly thing, a shameful thing, and his heart was very heavy, and he even wanted to report it to the instructor, explain it, and show the letter to the instructor to prove that he had not done any corrupt and depraved obscene things, and there was nothing unsightly in the letter. But he really wished that there were a few words in the letter that were only for himself, and he opened the letter tremblingly, when the trumpet of the charge sounded. He was wounded in this battle, and the letter was lost before he could read it. After that, he went south, crossed the river, and suppressed bandits, and he no longer had time to think about it. When he remembered it, he wrote to Shumei again. The letter was returned. She has left the art troupe and gone somewhere to study.

He was bored with this for a few days, and slowly it faded. After that, like all people, he was busy with work, studying, falling in love, getting married, making mistakes, being praised, and never thinking of her again.

At the end of the fifties, an old comrade-in-arms went on a business trip to the city where Xu Dawei worked, and came to visit Xu Dawei by the way. When drinking, while Xu Dawei's lover was cooking, he told Xu Dawei that once he went to a foreign affairs department on business and unexpectedly ran into the girl who sang a small cow.

"It looks like life is not going well! Holding a child, but saying that there is no lover, it is probably divorced. She said she would soon be transferred out of that unit. And somehow, the old comrades for so many years don't seem to have joined the party yet! ”

Xu Dawei wanted to inquire deeper, but the comrade-in-arms had not done an investigation and knew nothing, and this situation was all brought out by her own words, according to him, she was not enthusiastic about her old comrades-in-arms, and she did not even say a word about inviting her to sit at home.

Xu Dawei thought to himself: "How did you end up in this field?" ”

He was secretly bored for a day or two, and then faded again. Since then, I have never had a chance to talk about her, and when I think of her, I finally erased the name from my memory. , just as he was being criticized and fighting, two foreign transfer personnel with black leather bags came out of nowhere, and said: "You are very familiar with Xiao Shumei, tell me about her, and strive for meritorious atonement!" ”

"Xiao Shumei?" Xu Dawei was stunned for a moment, and almost said to himself, "I don't know the person with this name!" ”

The man who came slapped the table, glared at him, and said that the failure to draw a clear line with the spies was extremely detrimental to the merits of his case. But the conscience of heaven and earth, he really can't remember. The visitor had no choice but to take out a photo of a thin, pale woman wearing a cadre uniform and a middle school badge to show him. He glanced at it, and was even more sure that he had never seen this person before. The visitor snapped, slapped the table loudly, and threw out a yellowed photo. Xu Dawei picked it up and saw that it was a still of "Little Cattle".

"This man is you! I can't get rid of it! ”

He wanted to take another look, but the picture was taken away. He reluctantly wrote a dozen words of proof material: "Twenty years ago, I played a small herd cow with her, and I hereby prove it." ”

This should have caused recollection, concern for her. But he himself was fighting during the day and writing materials at night, and his mind was numb, and there was no room for anything, and he didn't even have a chance to be bored. These fragments were all remembered after he saw the engraving on the moss, and it was the first time in more than 30 years that he recalled them so systematically. He regretted that he didn't take the initiative to ask her name just now, thus losing the opportunity to recognize each other, and there would never be such a chance again in this life. What happened to her? What prompted her to take such a crooked path, there was a sad look and tears behind her smile, she was carving her name, and she was also responsible for her misfortune!

It's time for the meeting. He walked back to the hotel in a distraught mood and threw himself into his normal work schedule. Meeting, speaking, arguing, negotiating...... Finally turned his attention around. After dinner, he calmed down. Another person strolled towards the Wanlang Bridge.

The water was still as flat as a mirror, and a few waterfowl circled around the white sails, chirping, and shallow ripples spread out from the side of the boat, scattering, and making a sigh of softness on the shore.

He stepped onto the bridge. Stroke the cool wet moss with your hands. He understood her attachment to the motherland, felt that she was swallowing the bitter medicine he had concocted, and had no intention of blaming her anymore. She twisted his own name with her nostalgia for her childhood, her homeland. This is perhaps the sweetest and least bitter memory of her life, let her keep it. Thankfully, I didn't recognize her, I didn't disturb her......

The moon rises above the water. The distant mountains, the nearby trees, the white sails still on the water, and the occasional flashing lighthouse are all covered with a dreamlike brilliance. He strolled down the bridge, walked thirty or twenty steps along the shore of the lake, and then turned back to look at the Wanlang Bridge, which was like a demure maiden, sleeping peacefully on the ripples in the moonlight. The Wanlang Bridge that Xiao Shumei told him about back then is exactly what it looks like, but it no longer belongs to Xiao Shumei. Seeing her sad feelings about her love for her homeland, she felt how much happiness she had to cherish to grow up on the land of her motherland and dedicate herself to the motherland. The past life is always a bit like an illusion, like a dream. But the fruits of work and labor are really left. Like this bridge, no one can remember what kind of people built it and how they lived, but the bridge still exists, serving generation after generation. Only labor is always real!

He quickened his pace. I will leave Wuxi tomorrow, and I have a few tasks to finish overnight.

Beijing, December 1979