Hey?

The rain was so heavy......

It was as heavy as the rain that day.

The dim and hazy street lamps are getting darker and darker, but the memories in the depths of my mind are getting clearer and clearer.

My name is Xu Yi.

Perhaps, the one who has nothing.

Like the name, my life seems to be more random than others.

I often wonder if my life would have been different if I hadn't cried and had to go to the amusement park when I was six years old.

In that case, Mom wouldn't have made a special trip to ask for leave, and Dad wouldn't have made a special trip to rent a car, and that day ...... You won't be in a car accident either.

I watched my father's head in the driver's seat hang limply, and I watched the co-pilot's mother breathe heavily, but blood kept gushing out of her broken throat, and I couldn't cover it with my hands.

It's raining, cars are smoking, passers-by are screaming......

I lost consciousness, was awake again, and was already in another place.

When the rain stopped, I curled up at the head of my bed, shivering, and cried as I remembered what had happened.

That day, at the age of six, I realized...... Orphaned himself.

After being sent to the orphanage, I became silent.

The children here are orphans, just like me, but they are also different from me, they laugh.

I'm not social, I'm always alone.

But I also have my own favorites, and I like to eat sugar.

Although the welfare home will give out candy, it will only be distributed once a week, and there will always be only one or two at a time.

Maybe I'm worried that my child will get tooth decay after eating too much, but I don't care.

On the day of the candy, I grabbed it.

I'm not gregarious, I'm heavy-handed, a bunch of kids can't beat me, and I always get a lot of candy.

One day, the orphanage gave out candy again, and I called the other children to the yard and told them to hand over the candy as usual, or else I would beat them.

But this time, they didn't listen.

I was about to start a fight when a dark, dry, thin figure came out.

She glared at me and shouted at me, "Don't give it!" I won't give it! ”

Then he turned to the others and said, "Go in, and I'll fight him!" ”

On that day, the sky was overcast and it was about to rain.

I hate it and when it rains, my luck is bad.

This dry black thin little girl, I know, she just came here in the past few days, everyone calls her Sister Xiaoli, she is older than most children, and she is almost ten years old when she enters the welfare home.

And though she was dark and thin, she was tall, a head taller than me.

The others immediately turned around and ran, I am a man, too lazy to meet her as a woman, not to mention, I don't want to get drenched in the rain.

I turned to leave, but she grabbed me.

"Don't go!"

"Loosen."

"No!"

Her voice was surprisingly loud.

"Believe it or not, I'll beat you!" I glared at her.

"Come on!" She rolled up her sleeves without showing any weakness.

The strong wind before the rain blew her tied braids to the side, and the sound was blown into the entire welfare home.

One by one, the guys leaned on the window and looked out, trying to see me being taught a lesson.

I couldn't hold it in my face, and I was about to start hitting her, but suddenly a lightning bolt crackled in the sky.

The white pit crackled away the rain clouds, and the rain poured down.

The heavy rain reminded me of the car accident that I didn't want to recall, and I looked at the white expanse in my field of vision, and her shadow, and immediately pounced like a madman, riding on her, punching and kicking, and trembling with fear.

She would fight back at first, but after grabbing me a few times, she stopped.

As if noticing something was wrong with me, she started yelling.

The mothers were also quickly called by the other children, and she and I were pulled away and taken away.

I didn't want to hit her like that, it was because the rain was bad.

However, this is fine, she must be frightened, and she will not dare to provoke me in the future.

However, that night, after everyone else had fallen asleep, she quietly ran to my bedside and shook me awake.

"What? I still want to fight! "I'm so nervous, I'm actually a little afraid of her.

"Give!" She suddenly stuffed something into my hand, leaned over her face, and said seriously: "My candy is for you, don't bully people in the future!" ”

"I don't want to ......" Before I could finish my sentence, she ran away in a hurry.

I spread out my palms, and two candies that were covered with candy wrappers were lying in the palm of my hand.

Later, I learned that it was the mother of the orphanage who told her that I was different from ordinary children, that I had witnessed the tragic death of my parents, and that I had been carried out from behind their bodies.

I'm withdrawn, perverse, have no friends, fear the rain, and just like ...... Eat sugar.

After that day, Pears became my only friend.

Although I never thought so, she insisted on it herself.

Soon, it's coming to the New Year.

There were a lot of mini-games in the welfare home, and everyone got new clothes, and I also had them, but I didn't get them.

Xiaoli found me and patted me on the back: "Hey? Why don't you take the gift? ”

I turned around and looked over her face at the children who were lining up to receive New Year's gifts, some younger than me, some older than me, but all of them came before me, most of them orphans who had been abandoned at birth.

Speaking of which, she was the only one who came later than me in this welfare home.

I suddenly wondered why she came to the orphanage. Are the parents dead too?

"Don't you think they're pitiful?" I said, "They think that when they receive a gift, they get love." ”

"How can there be love in this place? Everything here......" I pulled at my clothes and pants emotionally, "Food, use, gifts, it's all pity, it's just pity for them who don't have a home!" ”

"It's just pitiful, not love!"

"No family, no affection, it's all fake!"

I say "them", but I know that I am one of them.

She looked at me and didn't speak.

Don't seem to understand what I'm talking about.

She frowned hard and thought for a long time, shook her head, grabbed my hand, and broke my fingers with all her might.

"I'm annoyed, so what should we do, should we die like this?"

She shoved two pieces of candy into my hand.

I suddenly noticed that her skin was a little whiter than when she first came in.

"I don't want it! No relatives, no home, but ...... But as long as you live, you can find a new family! You can definitely find it! She said firmly.

I don't know why she can say this kind of thing so sure.

I didn't bother to bother with her, so I took the candy and shook off her hand.

The New Year is just an ordinary day, but people like to give it a special meaning.

There are no special people, and any festival is just an ordinary day.

My most important thing has been completely taken away from me in that car accident, and every day after that has been meaningless.

I was thinking that the meaning of my life might be to wait for death.

There is no difference to me between being dead and still alive.

The days went by day by day.

One year ...... Two years.

I still have only one self-proclaimed friend, and my personality hasn't changed in the slightest.

It's just that she has changed a little in the past two years, she is taller and her skin is whiter, and I can occasionally listen to her.

The children in the welfare home all privately said that I liked her, otherwise why would I, a violent maniac, beat everyone but never beat her.

I really listened to her and didn't rob other people's candy.

They don't know that they will get tired of eating too much candy, and with her two, it is just enough.

Moreover, I don't like her so I don't hit her.

She has been giving me candy in return for the past two years, and that's it.

That day, it was going to rain again.

Every rainy day, I would lock myself up, skip meals, and not want to see anyone.

Everyone is used to it, and so is she.

But that day, she came to me in the rain.

"Do what?"

I squinted at her.

She's still taller than me, still shriveled and thin, but her skin is a little whiter.

But I always felt that she didn't look as white as she used to be.

"You're going to school."

She looked at me.

"No." It turned out that this was the case, my age should have been sent to school a long time ago, but I didn't want to go, and if I did, I would skip school.

"Go!" She glared at me, her voice louder again.

She's always like this, not just for me, but everywhere in the orphanage, you can hear her nosy voice.

This child's affairs have to be taken care of, and she has to take care of that child's affairs, what a troublesome woman.

"What's the matter with you?" I glanced at her and said nonchalantly.

"If you don't go to school, you'll be scared of the rain all the time."

She suddenly said something that I didn't expect at all.

"Boom—"

At this moment, a thunderclap just exploded outside the window.

The snow-white electric light made my face turn white.

I clenched my fists, shoved her hard, and yelled, "Don't worry about it! ”

She's tough and tall, and it's not the first time I've pushed her, after all, she always likes to touch me.

It's the same this time.

But this time is not the same, because ...... She fell.

"Bang-"

She slammed to the floor, her face pale, and she lay motionless on the ground.

I froze.

The image of my parents in a car accident flashed in my mind again, and I ...... Killed another person?

In panic, I ran to call my mother at the orphanage.

Soon, the grown-ups came.

I can't admit that I overthrew her and made her faint.

But to my surprise, the adults at the orphanage didn't seem surprised, they hurriedly called the emergency number, and soon the ambulance came.

I suddenly felt that something was wrong, and I had to go with me whatever I said.

I kicked and bited, and no one could control me, so I could only go with the ambulance.

I looked at her lying on the stretcher, her face pale, and I was terrified to the extreme.

She's not going to die, is she? I pushed and fell, and then died......

I was trembling and couldn't help but ask my mother at the orphanage, "Will she die?" ”

The mother of the welfare home didn't seem to expect such a mess, and I would ask such a question.

But in her eyes, there was undisguised sadness, and she said, "Xiao Li may ...... Going to go. ”

I froze.

Is she really going to die?

The mother of the welfare home touched my head: "Little pear, she ......"

I sat in the ambulance in a daze, listening to the mother of the orphanage.

"Little pear, she was thrown away by her parents."

"Her family was poor, and when she was nine years old, she was diagnosed with cancer, and she couldn't afford to be sick, so she was brought to the city and thrown away."

"She knew where her home was, but she didn't say, she said she had amnesia."

"But you know...... She remembers everything and knows everything......"

"Cancer hurts, and she likes sugar."

"It doesn't hurt so much when I eat sugar......

"When she first came to the orphanage, she always said this with a grin."

"But her illness has been getting worse......"

“……”

No wonder although she has turned white in the past two years, she is getting worse and worse......

I suddenly understood a lot of things.

At this time, the nurse in the car said, "What is this child holding in his hand?" I can't break it. ”

"I'll see." The doctor came and pinched her fingers, breaking them one by one.

I looked over and saw two pieces of candy lying in her palms, clenched tightly.

"This kid ...... Likes to eat sugar. The mother of the welfare home explained, but she couldn't help but choke.

I stared at her closed eyes and the two glare pieces of candy in her palms.

I know that she didn't prepare these two candies for herself.

Suddenly! Her eyelashes twitched, and she slowly opened her eyes.

But at this time, the ambulance also stopped.

The back door opened, and I was pushed aside by the nurse and watched as she lay on the stretcher bed and was being pushed as fast as she could into the hospital.

I subconsciously ran along.

She tilted her head to look at me, the light in her eyes darker than before, and her braids hung down outside the stretcher, swaying.

"Go to school."

She spoke, not as loudly as she used to.

"You're going to laugh ......"

"Happily...... Stay alive ......"

The stretcher cart she was lying on was pushed up the slope, and two candies tumbled out of her palm and tumbled down in front of me.

I stopped, and paramedics scurried past me.

Suddenly the world was silent, and all I had in my eyes was the two pieces of candy.

The rain was pouring down, and I stood outside the front door of the hospital, quietly drenched in the rain.

Later, I was not afraid of the rain and stopped eating sugar.

……

Hey?

It's raining again......

By the way, I'm in a game, and this time it's ...... Shake out a little.

A woman with bloody hands was playing with my face, the emotion in her eyes...... Just like me used to be.

By the way, she is Zhong Xueran.

That's it...... It's Zhong Xueran.

She's really ...... It's exactly like me, the old me.

How good it is to be alive, how many people are trying to live.

Be happy, smile, what's the big deal as long as you're alive?

You don't have to look for meaning, it's enough to live with a smile...... Zhong Xueran.

Live your life......

————

"Yan Xiao!"

Zhong Xueran was surprised and delighted, at this moment, Yan Xiao actually drove in the old city!

"Save him!"

Without waiting for her to finish, Yan Xiao pulled her out of Xu Yi's arms.

Then he shoved Xu Yi's stiff body into the car.

"Can you save him? Yan Xiao? You can save him...... Is it? In the car, Zhong Xueran looked at him beggingly, her voice trembling.

Yan Xiao didn't say a word.

He glanced at the group of dead bodies that were about to rush over, slapped the steering wheel, and sped away.