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★ During the 125 days with Cangxi, Gong Yi learned to do self-media, and the small essays published in XHS have now been deleted.

★ 【27】Which do you choose, love or bread? （2022.8.14）

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01

There are always various big and small choices in life, every step counts, and every step will affect your life path, whether it is good or bad. When we choose a wrong choice, we regret the past and fear the future.

Yes, life choices are very important, so you should be cautious, and when choosing major life events at a fork in the road, you must stabilize your inner impulses, weigh the pros and cons and make the choice that you think is the best.

There are major life events, and there are several choices that must be a major fork in the road in life. Academic selection, work and employment, love and mate selection, marriage and divorce.

When faced with the major choices of life, whether we can be rational depends on whether our minds are mature enough. Of course, we don't want to make any mistakes in our choices, but we want to use the most rational mind to analyze and make the most beneficial choice for ourselves.

Here we will talk about a life event of love and mate selection. Love or bread, which will you choose? This seems to be a false proposition, and the false proposition also requires an answer, and sometimes life is always so helpless, and you have to make a question of choosing between left and right.

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02

Mr. A loves you very much, but he doesn't give you hope for the future, and he doesn't plan how to give you a future. He just wants to go with the flow and follow the path of love, and take one step at a time in the days to come. Realistic differences, economic conditions, life planning, living habits, etc. are all very difficult obstacles to break through.

Mr. B is a win-loser psychology for you. He already has a lot of money, you follow him without worrying about food and clothing, even if you squander, just go with the flow and follow the path of love, and take one step at a time in the days to come. He is very confident that nothing is a problem and that money can solve anything.

Mr. C loves you very much, he gives you hope for the future and plans your life for a lifetime. He is a life-and-death love at a glance, and tells you with practical actions that if you don't retreat for the rest of your life, he will never give up. There are no problems in different places, no problems in life planning, living habits that need to be run-in, and problems with economic conditions, he is redoubling his efforts.

A, B, and C are all standing in front of you at the same time. How would you choose? Love or bread? The rational brain will make us choose Mr. C without hesitation, Mr. C is both love and bread, and he has both. This is the best love, the best life choice.

C Jun is certainly the best state of life partner, he not only loves you, but also faces life positively, the mind is not poor is strong, strong and strong, and it is only a matter of time before he creates wealth and strives for a better life. When we meet Mr. C, love is open, and we must grasp it well when we meet it, and don't be lost by him.

It's a pity that most of our love lives are absent from the role of Mr. C, so when faced with the question of love and bread, when choosing Mr. A or Mr. B, our answers may jump frequently, and before making the final choice, we will repeatedly scrutinize and entangle our own decisions.

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03

Most young people will choose love, they think that bread can be earned, but love is something that can be met but not sought. Most of the people who have experienced the great sorrow of love choose bread, and they think that sincerity is worthless in the face of reality.

Bread without love is dry, and love without bread is astringent. Although love is good, it is certainly the sublimation of feelings, and although bread is vulgar, it is already the guarantee of love.

In our lives, in the end, whether we choose love or bread, I hope we all face the path we have chosen, walk bravely and without regrets.

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04

1. Bread and love, I choose the latter, with love, bread will naturally exist, but without love, no matter how delicious bread is, it will be tasteless.

2. Bread without love is very dry, and love without bread is very astringent.

3. Just give me love, and I'll buy the bread myself.

4. Questions about love and bread. Without bread, the two of them would not be able to care about love. Without love, eating bread will have no taste, which is similar to eating white steamed buns.

5. I think love is the most important, and now I think bread is more important. Although love is good, it is certainly the sublimation of feelings, and although bread is vulgar, it is already the guarantee of love.

In the game of life, do you choose love or bread?

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★ During the 125 days with Cangxi, Gong Yi learned to do self-media, and the small essays published in XHS have now been deleted.

★ [28] Friends can't afford it, lovers can't love it(2022.8.15)

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01

When people reach middle age, if they love someone very much, then please keep a friend's distance, so that you can live a lifetime, don't expect to be close, once people have greed, they are doomed to lose. That's it, but who can do it?

If you have a good impression of each other and like each other, how can you restrain the excitement in your heart? Falling in love is inevitable, but killing each other is helpless.

Obviously, I really want to get a simple kiss and hug between couples, and the soft love words in my ears can only be suppressed and unable to release, and I can't ask for it. Because you don't dare? Because of the fear of losing? Yes and no.

If you really love someone, you are afraid of losing. The other party's brilliance is revealed by you wearing an infinite filter. When you are insecure and suffer from gains and losses, in fact, the temperature sensor of the other party's love to you is broken, and it is your wisdom to continue to lower the bottom line to cater or stop losses in time.

If you really love someone, you are not afraid of losing. Wisdom tells the world to accept all people and things with a loving and inclusive heart, including all your own emotions. Your emotions tell you how helpless and lonely it is to play two roles alone. As long as you figure it out, love relies on mutual support, not one person's strength, and you know how to stop losses in time.

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02

Some scenery can only be liked, but not collected, just like some people, only suitable for meeting, but not suitable for holding hands. Hand in hand love, you have to be prepared for the painful blow that you may lose at any time.

The biggest regret in life is to meet someone special, but you understand that you can never be together, sooner or later, you have to give up. In the end, I realized that the most painful thing is not not to get, but to be reluctant.

Obviously care about each other very much, the whole heart is the other party, but I have to forcibly pull out the feeling of love, and I want to clear the other party out of the heart, this painful feeling is like an invisible hand grabbing your soft heart, mercilessly trying to squeeze the heart, it really hurts.

The road of wind and rain in life, you accompany me for a ride, and I miss you for the rest of my life. For the rest of my life, whether I see you or not, is in my heart. This is my cause and effect, and it is my blessing.

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03

Do you know why two people who are destined not to be together arrange for them to meet? Because I owe too much in my previous life, I am destined to pay it back in this life.

In this world, all encounters are either gifts or calamities. If you don't owe each other, how can you see each other? Thanksgiving, don't talk about debt.

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★ During the 125 days with Cangxi, Gong Yi learned to do self-media, and the small essays published in XHS have now been deleted.

★ [29] Loving oneself is not an absolute compromise, love is the ability to love others(2022.8.16)

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01

Why do we need to know how to love ourselves in order to know how to love others?

My friend asked, puzzled. She said: "If I really only focus on myself, I love myself all the time, and I don't care about him, I don't care about him, is that still love?" Is it also an ability to love him? In the same way, I don't like him to love himself more than I do! ”

Not once, at least until now, "love yourself" is also a proposition that I can't figure out thoroughly. However, the best way to love someone is to manage yourself. Give each other a high-quality lover, not desperately to be good to a person, that person will love you desperately.

But is that really the case? If the person I love, he only loves his own life, ignores me, will not take care of my emotions, and will not be willing to spend his time with me, blindly busy improving himself, such a lover is not what I want. I'm going to become a loser, I'm going to lose my sense of security completely.

Actually, isn't my thinking with my friends a little too extreme?

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02

Worldly feelings inevitably have a realistic side. You are valuable, and you must also know how to give in order to be valued by the other party.

If the person you love is not motivated at all, and will only check your whereabouts every day and tell you how much he loves you, although it can give you the greatest sense of security in love, but when you can only do nothing about it at the practical level, will you still love him? Could his love still be so deep and precious? The answer is no.

On the other hand, you also have to know what he's doing every day, and as long as he's free, he has to give you all the time, talk to you and me, and love you in the dark. And you, except for his affairs, there is nothing else for you to indulge in. Will the other party cherish you like this? The answer is obvious.

Therefore, if people want to maintain a long-term and comfortable intimate relationship, they rely on commonality and attraction, rather than oppressive flattery and blind giving, as well as moral kidnapping of self-touching.

We all need to learn to compromise "love ourselves". Maintain an intimate relationship, either partner does not have leisure time to learn to be alone, cultivate hobbies, find ways to make money, and improve the level of self-reality. If both parties have leisure and want to connect, enjoy the time between the two of them, put aside all negative emotions, and give each other warmth and hugs.

"Love yourself" can't use too much force to ignore the other person, so that the other party loses a sense of security, and suffers from gains and losses. "Love each other" can't be too hard, you will inevitably be humble, and then what you get is probably the bad news of being disgusted or even breaking up. There are few exceptions.

Whether it's love or life, if you exert too much force, you will inevitably work hard! Appropriate compromise and the golden mean can lead to a long stream.

In any case, loving yourself is an important criterion for maintaining healthy intimate relationships. Learn to love yourself well, how to love yourself well. It's fascinating that your lover also wants to see you love yourself better and better.