Paranoia

Shen Brew was obtained by means that did not enter the stream, but I still had a delusional idea for a long time.

1

When Shen Brew entered the door, the house was dark, and the moment I saw him, I snuffed out the cigarette and ran out angrily to ask him, "Where have you been?" Why don't you answer the phone? ”

He glanced at the dozen or so missed calls on his phone and smiled mockingly: "What, are you going to threaten me with that again?" ”

I couldn't make out his expression, but I didn't have to think about it to know that his beautiful eyes must be full of disgust and anger at the moment.

Actually, I don't blame him, even his friends look down on me.

At the graduation ceremony three years ago, I got Shen Brewing drunk and had sex with him, and then forced him to become my lover.

I told him that if he didn't listen to me, I would send a picture of us sleeping together to Lin Su.

Lin Su and Shen Brew were recognized as a pair of immortal couples in college, although he never admitted it publicly, but I know that he has some good feelings for Lin Su.

And my reputation has been ruined since that night.

Sometimes his friends look at me as if they've seen something dirty, "It's so tight." ”

They ridiculed: "But also, those who rely on that kind of subordinate means to get it, if they don't pay attention, they are also afraid of being robbed by others." ”

More than once, I heard the people around Shen Brew say to him: "Wen Rugu is really disgusting, constantly pestering you, all kinds of tailgating. Every time I go out to play, I keep asking where you are like chasing souls, and the phone keeps ringing. Ah, it's really hard for you. ”

Even later, when they got together, half of the time was to criticize me for fighting for Shen Brew, saying how vicious and inferior I was to break him up with Lin Su.

But I don't care, as long as I can get him, I don't care at all.

2

The first time I met Shen Brew, I wanted to take him for myself.

What a beautiful man, indifferent and detached, like the moon in the sky. As soon as I got close to him, I could even feel my heart fluttering violently.

The smell of clean, sunny air on his body touched me fiercely, and I desperately, desperately tried to grasp the light.

The voice of getting him and possessing him in the depths of my heart tore at my nerves.

A woman told me a long time ago that pain is the proof of love.

I can't help but think: what about Shen Brew? What does it look like for him to fall in love with someone? Will he also be disappointed and miserable because of his request?

is as arrogant as Shen Brew, will there also be red eyes and humble begging for a person?

Once in his sophomore year, he was impatient with me and sent me a WeChat message to ask:

- What do you really want to do?

- I don't want to do anything, Shen Brew, I'm just curious about what it's like for you to fall in love with someone?

There was no reply for a long time, and I was about to fall asleep holding my phone before he sent a sentence:

- It won't be you anyway.

Well... It won't be me.

- Could that be Lin Su?

3

I thought that I was interested in Shen Brewing on a whim, after all, this emotion was too strong, and it shouldn't last long.

No matter how bad it is, after I get him once, it's a big deal.

After all, I didn't expect to trap him with a few photos.

But I never thought that he would really threaten me, and I can only attribute it to the fact that maybe he really cares about Lin Su and wants to have a future with her.

At the same time, my mental condition was getting worse and worse, I could hardly bear not seeing Shen Brew for a long time, and my possession of him became stronger and stronger.

Anyone of the opposite sex around him who showed a hint of affection for him was warned by me.

Xie Qiao became more and more disappointed with my excessive behavior, and he once asked me, "Are you in love with him?" Not the playful kind. ”

I snuggled helplessly on the couch, looking up confused, does it matter? As long as he's by my side, wouldn't it be fine?

But every night when I see Shen Brewing pillow beside me, I unconsciously frown, and my heart occasionally hurts, do you hate me so much?

I also feel guilty, and I know it's not good, but I can't help it.

Only by his side can I feel at ease, and only in his body can I sleep without sleeping pills.

Except for staying away from Shen Brew, I can follow him and coax him in everything else.

Obviously, I did something that disgusted him, but in the end, I felt distressed and guilty when I saw his uncomfortable appearance, so I had to find other ways to compensate him doubly.

This complex sense of contradiction drove me crazy.

Xie Qiao knew my situation the most, and he hugged me distressedly: "As before, don't be like this." Uncle and aunt contacted a good expert in the UK, let's try it, okay? ”

Heh, they always do.

My parents, relatives, and even Xie Qiao now think that I am very sick, and they don't believe that I can control myself.

I tried desperately and hard to be a normal person and get rid of the past, but they always made me feel that I was sick.

I suddenly broke free from his embrace, jumped up from the sofa, and looked at him coldly: "Are you afraid that I will hurt Shen Brew?" ”

The doctor said that my mental condition was not well controlled, and it was possible to do anything.

Actually, it's true.

I even thought darkly: if one day I don't want to live, I will borrow Shen Brew's hand and have a relationship with him. I want him to remember me for the rest of his life, and he won't be able to get rid of me for the rest of his life.

Xie Qiao's tone was extremely helpless, "I never thought about it that way, I was just afraid... You will hurt yourself. ”

He paused and said tentatively: "As before, Aunt Yue's matter has passed... You..."

Before he could finish speaking, a glass flew past the side of his face.

There was a "bang", and in the quiet room, the sound of the cup breaking was extremely clear.

I was shaking with anger, and he shook his head with a wry smile.

This scene ironically slapped me in the face, after all, I just said that I can control myself.

Later, Xie Qiao went to the United Kingdom to study for a doctorate.

I didn't go to see him off on the day he passed through customs.

The last friend also left me, and now I have nothing but Shen Brewing.