Cheng Xin's change made Chen Moyan breathe a sigh of relief, he was always afraid that her state would affect the children.

I don't dare to say that she is not good like this, for fear that she will have postpartum depression or something.

When she gave birth, because Cheng's mother was not in good health, it was inconvenient to accompany her.

So Chen Moyan and Yunfei accompanied her throughout the whole process, two big men, there is always something inconvenient.

The service of the confinement center is very considerate, but people are only responsible for taking care of her body, so if there is something uncomfortable in her heart, they don't understand it very well.

Many years later, Chen Moyan, who was over half a hundred years old, sat on the hospital bed, staring at his father in front of him, who was too old to see his young appearance.

My heart was filled with grief, and it was as if time had gone back to the night I saw off my mother.

Cheng Xin thoughtfully took his three sons out of the ward, leaving the last time for the father and son.

Yun Fei's consciousness was a little blurred, his memory seemed to be confused, and it was clear that the son in front of him had reached the age of being a grandfather, but he seemed to have seen Xiao Moyan.

"Xiaoyan, smile more, talk more, Dad doesn't like your gloomy and gloomy appearance with your head down, children should be sunny and cheerful."

"Dad." Chen Moyan's voice was much older.

"Hey, dad is here, when dad gets better, take Xiaoyan to buy building blocks to play, I heard that there is a new one." Yun Fei's gaze drifted a little.

"Dad, thank you!" Chen Moyan whispered sadly in his ear: "Thank you for coming and saving my life and my mother's life. ”

Hearing this, Yun Fei closed his eyes peacefully, still smiling on his face.

"Dad!" The man's painful and stoic cry rang out in the ward.

"Dad!"

"Grandpa..."

Zhang Yuezhen and the children outside the door also pushed the door in, crying bitterly.

…………

My life is dark and gloomy.

My name is Chen Moyan, and I have a cowardly and miserable mother and an alcoholic and violent father.

I pity my mother, I hate my father, and I've been suppressing the monster in my heart.

It was yelling all the time for me to kill the man, and I knew I couldn't do that.

This is a society governed by the rule of law, I can't commit crimes, I can be covered in mud, but I can't touch the bottom line.

I also called the police, but each time it ended with my father sincerely admitting his mistake and my mother bitterly forgiving.

I know the reason for my mother's compromise because of me! She wanted me to study well, to get ahead, and to escape from the small, dark rented house full of alcohol and violence.

However, I let her down......

I couldn't study well, my heart was uncertain, I was worried about the hopelessness of the tuition fee for the next semester, I felt sorry for her getting up early and greedy for me, and hating my origin.

When I was a child, I often wondered if my mother would be happier without me. And I'm free......

When my mother died unexpectedly and the man was imprisoned, everyone cast sympathetic glances at me.

Their remarks include scolding at their fathers and hatred of their mothers.

"It's okay if this kind of domestic violence man is willing to marry, he has been beaten so many times, he called the police for mediation, and he hasn't divorced, isn't this a masochist!"

"That's why the poor must have something to hate."

"It's a pity that their son, the clothes are washed white, and now that he has no parents, how will he live in the future!"

"Poor what, there are parents like that, what do you think their children can be? I heard that I often fight with people, and I like petty theft. ”

"It's true that dragons give birth to dragons and phoenixes, and sons born of mice will make holes."

I can't argue with these rumors, and I don't want to.

The house of the dead man was not clean, and the landlord cursed our family, threw out all their things, and kicked me out.

"I'm really bleeding into blood mold, I met a family like yours, get out! Hurry up and get out of here, if you weren't young, I would have to ask you to compensate me for my losses. The landlady spat in disgust at where he stood.

"Don't let me see you again, Mourning Star."

I silently picked up my mother's things, and as for the man's, I threw them all into the trash.

I took my luggage, settled on a park bench, washed in the public toilet, and ate with the only money my mother had left before she died.

When I meet acquaintances, I always point fingers, either saying that I am a thief, or calling me the son of a murderer.

Only my mother did odd jobs, and the proprietress there sympathized with me and gave me some manual work to do, and the money was not much, enough for me to eat.

Later, I went to see the man once, and he was very excited when he saw me and asked me to save some money for him, and he lived in it and had a bad life without money.

I laughed when I heard this, and in his shocked eyes, I said the most vicious words to him, "I'm happy to know that you're not doing well."

You don't think that in my heart, you are my father, do you? No, I've been trying to finish you out in the middle of the night.

I'm your child! How do you think I'm simple, honest, and obedient?

I'm just like you, I'm a bad seed.

Reform well, if you feel bitter, then die, I won't come to see you again. ”

I turned away at Chen's vicious curses, and he was taken back to his cell by the police.

…………

After I left the prison, I was not in much better mood, and I was bored and got drunk once.

Walking by the river, blowing the wind, in fact, I would not have lost my footing, but I thought to myself at the time.

If I die in the river, can I wash the sludge off my body and be reincarnated in a normal family in the next life, and be an innocent person?

So my feet were empty.........

When I woke up again and heard the storm outside the window, I was a little confused.

The light of the night light allowed me to see the face of the person who had fallen asleep in my arms, a familiar face in my midnight dreams.

Mother, mother when she was young......

What was in my mind at the time? I thought that God was really unfair, I was dead, and I had to go back to this house and go through it all over again.

Ling Chi's pain, but that's it.

However, what happened after that, everything was wrong with memory.

Dad set up a stall to do business, and he would give a lot of living expenses to his mother every month, and his mother was no longer worried about money, and the smile on her face became brighter and brighter.

That man's body has no smell of alcohol, he loves to be clean, and he takes care of himself neatly every day, and there is always only a fragrance of soap on his body.

He would take us out to play, plan to save money to buy a house, send me to school, worry about me being bullied by my classmates, and buy me toys.

will make my mother happy, will accompany us considerately, and will patiently enlighten our bad mood.........

The first Superman he gave me was a week after I was reborn, and I put it at the head of my bed, and he thought I liked Superman.

Later, whenever there was a new style, she would buy it for me, and my mother was distressed and said that it was too much of a waste of money.

He always smiled and said, "I make money just to make you two happy." ”

In fact, he didn't know that what I liked was not Superman, but because he was like a warrior who paid for me and my mother without regrets.

Fearlessly, he held up a bright sky for them, as if he was there, and my mother and I only had to do whatever we wanted.