It's been more than a month since my wife left, and I finally feel a little more real.

She has always been in better health than me, but this year she was very sick, and she was still discussing with me in late spring that she would leave her hometown and go to the beach to see what the sea was like while she could still walk around and warm up in the summer. But who knew that he was not feeling well not long after he was ambushed, and he didn't care much about the weakness of his limbs and thought it was a bitter summer, after all, this person was old and felt more distinct and uncomfortable than before in all seasons. Later, she occasionally got dizzy, and when she told me, she told me that it was not a big deal, maybe she didn't have a good rest, and the cicadas on the summer night made her sleep too shallow. She's always had ideas, and she's so much better than me, but I didn't care about the details.

The tour group reported, but she had a high fever before the trip. I still remember that she burned badly, kept talking nonsense, her words were broken, and she was vaguely telling her daughter something.

The son-in-law rushed to the city hospital overnight, saying that she was going to be hospitalized, but there was no choice but to withdraw from the tour group.

Soon after being discharged from the hospital, the doctor said that he wanted to recuperate, so he canceled the plan to go to the beach to play, and she was not annoyed, but she was a little regretful: "It seems that I can't go to the beach, God is against me, I really want to see the sea." "My wife and I agreed to go back next year, but she just smiled and shook her head and didn't say anything.

After returning from the hospital, her spirits were much worse than before, and she would always fall asleep in the afternoon sun. When people are old, their skin is naturally not as fresh and shiny as young people, and I still remember that in the sun, my hands were with hers, dry and wrinkled, mottled but also warm.

Then the day of mid-autumn, the day when it was cool in the morning, the afternoon when we were basking in the sun, the cat was at her feet, the sun was warm, and she was half-asleep, and suddenly someone seemed to shout in my head, and I turned my head to find that she was muttering something again, and when I touched my forehead, I really had a fever.

I hurriedly called a taxi to take her to the hospital, but I couldn't make it to the sun rising the next day.

Now that she has been gone for more than a month, I don't really feel it, although my daughter has taken leave to accompany me to complete everything, but all kinds of pairs of things in the house are still the same as before, as if she was there when you turned around.

My daughter persuaded me to move in with her, but I didn't do it, and my wife was buried in the cemetery on the mountainside behind the old house, and I could accompany her here.

It's winter, the weather is getting colder, and without her taking care of me, my sense of temperature is dull. The feet don't feel cold, but when you soak your feet at night, you will feel that the water is too hot, and the quilt is also frozen at night to wake up before you know to turn it out and add it, and you don't take it out to dry in the autumn, and cover it with a musty smell. She is also taking care of a few pots of evergreen flowers and plants outside the house, and now they are almost withered, and the cat is gone, it is not a domestic cat, and it will not appear near me without the feeding of his wife, and even recently I found that there is a layer of dust in the house.

I think people's hearts are always slower than time, I didn't know that I was old when I was with her, and when I returned to the old house after retirement, day after day, year after year, time was as warm as amber. Now that she's gone, it's the changing seasons that make me realize she's gone, she's really gone.

I suddenly felt sad, as if I had only known about it. It was getting late, the cold wind was rising, the cold wind was howling into my dream, I seemed to have dreamed a lot this night but I didn't remember, it seemed to be her and it didn't seem to be.

When I woke up from my dream, I looked out and saw that the snow had accumulated a layer of snow. I still feel cold inside, is she even colder outside? My wife, my love, she's still in the snow!

I grabbed my coat and wanted to go out, but her voice sounded in my ears, so clearly, like she was right next to me, and I heard it clearly, saying, "Dressed up, and you want to cough, don't you?" "I don't believe in gods and Buddhas, but she, I want to believe that she is still with me, I want to believe it.

After getting dressed, I took her favorite coat that my daughter had given her, took an umbrella and a flashlight and headed up the mountain.

I swept the snow off the stele and draped my coat over it, and I stayed with her for a while and talked, and then it was dawn. The snow has stopped, the weather has cleared, and the light clouds in the east reflect the light morning glow. I said goodbye to my wife and went back to the house to continue the day.