Taking my appearance alone, anyone would think that this is an ordinary person who can be seen everywhere, and his face is far from vicious or sinister. And the old man reacted so vigilantly to this, saying that he did not recognize me, that he must be deceiving himself. But his reaction was more than that, and on the premise of recognizing me, the tense movement of his eyes and posture was like a trained hunter who accidentally encountered a beast in the forest. It's definitely not the feeling of a dog jumping off the wall to fight back, it's more like calmly calculating what strategy he is going to subdue me if I suddenly attack. This is not the normal reaction of a weak old man when he meets a serial killer on the street, is he a warlock?

Stimulated by his reaction, I reflexively calculated my "hand" on my side.

It's a pity that now I have the title of "Demon Li Duo", but I am actually quite weak.

My fighting power is basically all derived from "it", and now that "it" is dead, my power has become a castle in the air. The same is true of this modified body, although it still has very strong muscles, but it is only "very strong" in the common sense zone, and it is not capable of exporting great power in itself, but it is transformed to better carry the power of "it". Without the source of "it", my transformed body is like an engine without fuel.

If I had to say, there was still a little bit of fuel left, and it was like the warm ashes left after it had burned out, and when I blew hard, I could see the ashes glow orange-red, but I couldn't light an open flame anymore.

The Siren's Blade is now also unsummonable.

The bluebird in the dream describes the siren blade as "a weapon given to me by monsters", which is really good. It was only after I was supported by "it" that I became able to summon that weapon out of thin air, to be specific, one day after feeling that I was almost used to the power of "it", I inexplicably had a certain feeling of "about to come out" in my heart, and following this feeling to make a move against the air, that weapon appeared for the first time.

Now that the power of "it" support is only residual heat, it is understandable that the Siren's Blade has become most summonable in dreams, but not in reality.

…… But, to be honest, I've always felt that the existence of the Sirenblade is a bit inconsistent.

Specifically, with the support of "it", I was able to do other miraculous things, such as being able to breathe even when I was submerged in the water, or using my consciousness to gather moisture in the air. If "it" is a monster similar to a kraken, then I understand all of these skills very well. The strong physical force is also, at least I have clearly experienced the process of transformation, and I can also feel the "fuel" from "it". But what about the Siren's Blade?

Of all the power that "it" gave me, only this axe exuded an air of misfit. Although I do have a "siren" in the name, it is actually my own name. And judging from the fact that "it" can no longer be summoned after it disappears, although it is indeed inseparable from the power of "it", there is always some intriguing atmosphere.

While the old man was engrossed in confronting me, the child couldn't help but move at first, complaining about why the old man was rude, and trying to struggle out of the old man's hand that grabbed him by the collar.

"Still moving, don't move!" The old man snorted, but his gaze remained on my body, "There have been murderers in the city lately. ”

"Murderer!" The child's eyes widened, but he was not afraid, but the newborn calf was not afraid of the tiger.

The old man threatened: "If you run around like that again, beware of being caught and eaten by murderers." ”

This is clearly alluding to me. However, just saying that I am a "murderer" is really considerate enough to me, as if I am also in the same echelon as those who only kill one or two people. With such a backdrop, my image in the hidden world seems to be kind and kind.

The old man, who seemed to be a warlock, dragged the child away, and he stared at me intently the whole time, but did not say a word to me. This reminds me of the strange legends that circulate in some places, that people must abide by the rules of yin and yang in the wild, and that when you encounter a lonely ghost, you must not talk to it, otherwise something bad will happen. Now I am so different from these normal people.

I also left here and continued to wander the great city like a lonely ghost, tasting the taste of nowhere to go.

The sun slowly sets on the other side of the city, eventually sinking between the clusters of buildings.

It's time to put an end to it, too.

I found an open space off the beaten track, intending to end up here, but I couldn't wait for the passers-by who found me then.

Taking a deep breath, I raised my right palm, intending to input all the residual heat of the "ashes" in my body into my hand, and then aimed it at my head and hit it fiercely.

In the past, I couldn't have died if I just had my head blown open, but now I don't have that outrageous ability.

However, just as I was about to start, for some reason, various images from the dream appeared in my mind.

I want her to say I'm like a hero too.

The movement was sluggish for a moment.

It was at this moment that I felt my raised wrist be firmly locked by a force like a vise.

"What are you going to do!" A familiar female voice came to my ears.

Turning my head, it was a blue bird, who had come to my side at some point, and glared at me with a serious face.

I don't know why she's here, but it seems that my plan is not to continue.

After that, we entered a nearby restaurant. The atmosphere was silent, as if it really had weight on the shoulders, and at the same time it was a little awkward, and no one spoke for most of the dishes. I noticed that she had switched back to a teal feather hair ornament and wondered if I was going to use this to open the conversation.

Suddenly, the blue bird spoke, "I watched you for a few hours, and then your expression became more and more ...... You don't want to cut yourself off, do you? ”

"How many hours have you watched me?" I asked, confused, "Didn't you go to work?" ”

Her face froze, "Ah." ”

"You're not tailgating me, are you?" I asked.

"I didn't ...... No, I don't. She looked away in a weak heart, but what she had just said had exposed all that she had done. Was it her job as an overseer to follow me for hours? Or is she just worried about me? If it's the latter, I'd be happy, but that's a shameless anticipation.

After a while, she said, "It was the bureau's psychoanalyst who said something to me, so I ......."

She shook her head suddenly, and said viciously, "You, if you die on your own on the first day I am in charge of supervision, it will be a shame on me, do you know it?" ”

"What did the psychoanalyst say to you?" I asked curiously.

She recalled for a moment and concluded: "To put it simply, if it were the original you, you would definitely go around first after your acquittal, like the streets or neighborhoods where you lived before. I feel that after I have almost finished shopping, or after the sun goes down, I will 100% choose a place where no one is there. ”

As a psychologist from the Security Bureau, he analyzed my psychology and movements very clearly.

That's why the blue bird will follow me after listening to it, in order to avoid humiliating himself.

But there was one detail in her words that I cared about, "—if it was the original me?" ”

"You're probably not going to break yourself off now." She said, "Or rather, you after that dream." ”

"Why?" I asked.

"She won't tell me." She said helplessly.

It seems that the psychoanalyst felt that he had said it, as if he was saying good things about people like me, and he probably felt a little uncomfortable.

I myself know that even if the blue bird didn't stop me just now, the outcome would not change. When I flashed the scenes of the dream in my mind, and hesitated for a moment, it was impossible for me to break myself off there. Because in the real face of death, there is a very strong thought that shines in the depths of my dark heart. Where the thought was, there seemed to be a familiar figure in white summer casual clothes who seemed to have just stepped out of the mountain path under the scorching sun, staring at me without saying a word. The mere sight of him made me lose my breath and let go of all my strength.

- Why can't it be me?

I can't be that kind of person anymore, I can't be. Even so, if I had to die, I would have liked to die in a more heroic setting, rather than in the deserted open space, where the decay would scare the people I met into vomiting. In other words, I just want to die on the way to save others. In a sense, this is also a "recycling" of my irretrievable life.

It was because I realized that I still had such longings and obsessions that I hesitated.

"Stop thinking about yourself." "I know you're feeling very bad, but there's really no need for you to blame yourself for that," she said. You've just been brainwashed and manipulated by the Kraken......"

"I've said it many times. I was not brainwashed, much less manipulated. ”

"I've read the diagnostic reports submitted by psychoanalysts. The reason why you insist on claiming to everyone that you have not been brainwashed is not because you are really so convinced, but because you do not allow yourself to believe that everything you have done in the past is based on hypnosis and brainwashing. She pressed her hands on the table, leaned forward, and looked at me hard, as if trying to look into my inner world through my eyes, "Do you think that if you accept this diagnosis yourself, you will naturally defend yourself in your heart." The problem is that you can't forgive yourself. ”

"It seems that psychoanalysts in the Security Service sometimes make mistakes." I sighed in my heart as I commented.

Maybe I was really brainwashed — not just after my arrest, but over the past five years I've been repeated.

But what a despicable thing to think about. Whether they are controlled or not, aren't they all my hands that kill people?

She added, "And, we have a basis. ”

"On what basis?" I asked.

She asked rhetorically, "Do you know about the 'uncanny valley effect'?" ”

"Of course I do." I say.

One of the advantages of the information age is that even people like me, who have no achievements in related majors, may have seen some theoretical terms that sound very advanced on the Internet, such as the uncanny valley effect, Stockholm syndrome, post-traumatic stress disorder, etc., and such as Schrödinger's cat, double-slit interference experiment, uncertainty principle, and other terms that are very popular among folk quantum mechanics experts and patients with secondary diseases.

The so-called uncanny valley effect refers to the phenomenon that when people see something that looks like a human or a non-human, they feel creepy.

This phenomenon is often seen in robots with a human appearance.

She continued: "So, do you know why humans have the uncanny valley effect? ”

"A robot that resembles a human but doesn't quite look like it will make people instinctively suspect that it's not a living person, but a corpse?" I'm talking about the hypothesis of the uncanny valley effect. In fact, there is no unified explanation for the uncanny valley effect, and although there are many convincing hypotheses, there is no convincing conclusion. This kind of thing is not uncommon in psychology, if physics explores the tangible, psychology explores the intangible, and in this invisible field, sometimes even the criteria of right and wrong are intangible.

"The warlocks have long since come to a conclusion about it. Creatures that are not humans, possess far superior strength to humans, but deliberately look similar to humans - there is only one reason for such a thing, and that is to prey on humans. She said, "Since time immemorial, human beings have been faced with the threat of human-like and non-human things, which is why the 'uncanny valley effect', a reflexive psychological phenomenon that has not been explained in the framework of normal psychology, has evolved." This is all so that humans know to run away when they encounter something that looks like a human being. And the humans who don't know how to run away quickly, their genetic factors have not been passed down in the end. ”

She continued, "Why didn't you run away from the Kraken. Instead of running away, he took the initiative to hug her. It's all because she seduced you with her evil powers. Deceive your biological instincts and incite your physical desires. It's purely a survival strategy for her creature, just as pitcher plants attract insects with their sweet fragrance, which they then prey on and digest to make them their own nutrients. ”

I didn't respond to her for a while.

I think if "it" wants to devour me, I'll gladly join it. Listen to the sound of "it" chewing on me slowly, becoming one in a wet yet soft embrace. If this kind of overly abnormal thinking is implanted from the outside, it is reasonable.

But I had a hard time convincing myself that this dark, sticky desire was not from my own heart; If, on the other hand, I'm good enough to put into words my most unspeakable thoughts, then surely, even if it's rare, someone will resonate with me. Somewhere far away from civilization and society, in the cave where the dripping water sounded at that time, I hugged each other lonely with the strange and beautiful female body like a snake, and I didn't want to sink my soul to the end, all the time—such grotesque desires that are difficult to explain the motive must not be unique to me.

"I have to admit that the Siren's mimicry is quite powerful, and ordinary people may not be able to have an uncanny valley effect on her, and the only people who will have an uncanny valley effect on her are those special groups whose perception is beyond the normal range." "That conclusion applies to you as well," she said. When you were a demon, you had a far more perceptive power than ordinary people, and you really fell in love with her, which is definitely brainwashing. Unless you're a one-in-one psychologist, there's no way the Security Service's psychoanalysis can go wrong. ”

"What if I'm really that psychologically abnormal?" I asked rhetorically.

She gave me a deep look, "It's not like you're saying it. In your dreams, you always think that such an ultra-low probability event will not happen to you. ”