Impulsive venting, wanton roaring Peng Zhen, in the quiet space, it seems that the echo of my roar can still be heard. I was on the spot, and I had a sense of déjà vu in my heart for a moment, and my mother was the same, with the mentality of 'the whole world is sorry for me', and slowly made herself a person who didn't like to be close to.

This is one of the reasons why I have been persuading myself to try to forget the past, as the saying goes, when you are staring into the abyss, the abyss is staring at you. If I don't forget those pasts, but keep recalling the past, remembering those who hurt me, and even full of expectations of revenge. So will I also become a person like my mother, paranoid and insecure all my life, and lonely but so sad.

I don't want that.

I quickly calmed down, I don't need Peng Zhen's guilt and return, I want a better future, I am with heaven, a beautiful and sunny future.

I calmed down and said to Peng Zhen, "Okay, let's talk." It's no secret that I don't deny that he's your son. But he doesn't belong to you now, and if you get married and have children in the future, his identity will be even more embarrassing. The best thing is that I leave the country with him, and we don't show up in front of people, which is also the best for you. ”

You can't always be selfish, and preventing everyone from taking your children away won't give your children a better life. For Peng Zhen, he has appeared in front of me at the same time as Huo Fangfei more than once, I think, his marriage with Huo Fangfei is afraid that it is a certainty, then heaven will be very embarrassing in China.

Peng Zhen looked at me coldly, without the teasing and joking just now, with a bitter coldness, "You mean, so that he will never know that I am his father?" Let him always know only his uncle, not my father? ”

I shook my head, "No, it's not. Heaven will always grow up, and he will always have the day when he asks himself, and I don't intend to deny you in front of my children. But...... But not now, he is too young to understand the grievances between adults, nor can he perceive the ....... of this world Filthy. "When I say it's difficult, it's like I'm going to cry the next moment. It's not that I haven't thought about hiding it from heaven for the rest of my life, so that he will never know everything that has happened.

But as the child grew up little by little, I understood that such a decision might not work.

But how to say it?

In the past, even I felt cruel to the limit, terrible, so when he got to heaven, how would he face his father, grandfather, these people who were closest to his blood relationship, who hurt me the most, even the deepest hurt him.

It's too cruel to let a child face the grievances of both parents.

I couldn't hold back my crying, and made my words clear, "Peng Zhen, you've seen heaven, he's such a sensitive and fragile child, we can't ...... He must not be allowed to be harmed. ”

That's the only thing I prayed for.

My heaven should always be carefree, not like me, always need to face multiple choice questions, mother and father, love and family, as if there is never an end.

Peng Zhen suddenly pounced, he hugged me tightly, staring into my eyes.

His eyes were bloodshot, and he didn't know if it was a lack of sleep or if it was all of a sudden.

"You don't want him to be hurt, and you want to protect yourself, so what about me?" What are you going to do with me? ”

Such a question does not seem to be easy to answer.

But wasn't the answer available many years ago?

I was not timid, and said truthfully: "You still have your family, you didn't choose them early." And your marriage contract, Huo Fangfei has been with you for more than six years, and it's almost seven years, you should always give her an explanation. ”

When my mother's incident happened, Peng Zhen had clearly chosen to maintain the family, and since he had already chosen, he should stick to it, shouldn't he?

and Huo Fangfei......

I admit that I am still cautious, and the pictures of Huo Fangfei and Peng Zhen entering and exiting each other again and again seem to be engraved in my mind, and I really can't pretend to turn a blind eye.

Not to mention, Peng Zhen still has so many scandal objects.

Peng Zhen's mouth opened to bite me, he would do things to me at every turn, I was actually used to it, I simply closed my eyes and endured, but his teeth touched my face and retracted his strength, changed to licking, I was touched by the tip of his wet tongue, and suddenly woke up and turned my head to stare at him.

Peng Zhen hung his head and whispered, "What can I do to forgive me, can you tell me?" It's been so many years, you'...... Can you give me another chance and forgive me. ”

His tone was so sad that it made my eyes a little sour.

The more moments like this, the more I didn't dare to cry, so I could only continue to say, "You didn't do anything wrong, where do you need my forgiveness." Back then, you all chose the family, you, Jin Ge, and Ye Gaochi, no one forced you, they were all chosen by you, and when it comes to it, you are not wrong. ”

Peng Zhen roared, "Yes! No one is pushing us! No one is forcing us, but we have teamed up to send you to hell! You say I'm like them, really? They don't have you! Without you! ”

In the days that followed, Peng Zhen also stiffened his neck and said that he was not wrong, why did everyone make the same choice, but only he had to accept the punishment! This is not fair, Jin Ge and Ye Gaochi, are they all nobler than him? No! It's all the same!

But in his heart, he understood that he was wrong, very wrong.

Because at that time, the only person Lin Fart trusted was him, knowing the cause of his mother's death, even if Lin Flail clearly understood that the person who caused the accident was his cousin, he still found him for the first time, what kind of trust is this, he is above everyone in her heart.

Every time I think of it, when Lin Flail came to him in grief with the video, wanting to get justice for his mother, Peng Zhen would have palpitations.

That may be the moment when Lin Flail is closest to him, and as long as he catches it, they will be together forever.

As a result, he did not cherish that opportunity.

He betrayed Lin Flai, although he had so many reasons, but the fact is that he betrayed Lin Flai's trust, he did not help Lin Flail find the murderer, and even sheltered the person who killed her mother everywhere.

Now it is said that he had the same choice as Jin Ge and Ye Gaochi back then, yes, yes, it was the same.

But the biggest difference is that he had a woman who trusted him wholeheartedly and was still pregnant with a child for him, while Jin Ge and them did not.

I thought that Peng Zhen must have slapped the saddle too hard, so the tears in my eyes couldn't help but be shaken down, and I hurriedly wiped it with my hands, not wanting to make myself look fragile. Things have passed, and the hardest time has been carried by themselves, so why bother to show a haggard appearance after many years in exchange for mercy.

Holding back, tears seemed to pour out, from the nose into the throat, the slightest itch, couldn't help coughing, couldn't suppress it.

Peng Zhen was frightened, hurriedly let go of me, took out the thermos cup from the car seat storage box, and quickly poured water into the cup, "Chuanbei loquat dew, the doctor said that it is very good for your cough, you drink it quickly." ”

I coughed so badly that I couldn't drink anything, so I could only shake my hand at Peng Zhen.

He may have misunderstood what I meant, and he was about to call the hospital in a hurry, "Shall we go to the hospital now?" Are you uncomfortable there, tell me about it? ”

The panic he presented was too intense.

I was a little embarrassed, I adjusted my breathing, let myself recover slowly, just now I coughed violently and my throat was slightly hoarse, "I'm really fine, this kind of cough is very common, don't call." ”

Peng Zhen's eyes were even redder, he looked down at the cup in his hand, unprecedentedly depressed, "Flails, it's all my fault, I'm sorry for you, and I'm sorry for the child." I don't ask you to forgive me, but at least give me a chance to make amends, okay? Shall I take care of you? I can change it, I can change it, what should I do....... to forgive me. ”

Over the years, many things have changed, but there are also things that have not changed.

I still can't see Peng Zhen's depressed appearance, I always think that he should be high-spirited, even if he is cold or even arrogant, he should always be so shining, not like this, as if all his spiritual power has been drained.

I laughed, with indulgence and relief from the past.

In fact, with Peng Zhen's words, I should put it down.

"Don't do that, Peng Zhen. You shouldn't be like this. I'm doing well now, getting family that I never thought I could have, father, brother, uncle, aunt, and even heaven. Though...... My mom can't see it. But people should always be content, I always think that I should be content, my father and brother love me very much, heaven used to be a little bad, and now it is slowly changing, people should look to the future, as long as I think about my heaven will grow up and grow into a boy like poplar, I feel very happy. ”

Peng Zhen didn't change his movements at all, just whispered, "It's just that in your happiness, there is no me, right?" ”

I was a little stunned, and said to him left and right, "Your identity is different now, and I have seen some news about you abroad in the past few years." and the Peng family, I'm afraid they are all looking forward to you getting married as soon as possible, we have been separated for so many years, you are not doing well, forget me, just forget it. ”

The cup and thermos pot in Peng Zhen's hand flew out and smashed directly on the windshield in the front row, and he roared, "Which eye of yours saw that I was doing well!" You think I don't want to forget you! But you're dangling in front of my eyes all day long! You shake me when I eat, and you shake when I sleep! I've ridden until I'm two hundred and seventeen, and I'm still standing in front of my bike! ”

He was all red, with despair and pleading, "You come and tell me, there is no place for you in this world, where?!" ”

The medicinal soup thrown out by him spilled out, and the car was filled with the smell of Chinese medicine, just like our relationship at this time, bitter and dark.

I fell silent.

This kind of silence is relatively unbearable, in fact, it is more unbearable, and I almost feel like I am going to suffocate.

I reached out to open the door, intending to leave, I said what I needed to say and what I wanted, and it didn't really make sense to say anything more.

The moment I opened the door, Peng Zhen rushed over and hugged me, but he wouldn't let me go.

It was really not surprising that he acted like this, I looked at him, "You have said that you were wrong, do you want to force me now?" ”

Peng Zhen stared into my eyes, and he said softly, "What if...... If...... You really can't forgive me, then give me the child. ”

I thought I was hallucinating.

Look at him incredulously.

Peng Zhen was not interrupted by my surprise, but said to himself: "You, I'm afraid I won't get it in this life." Child, I want it! ”

That was the last glory of his life, and he couldn't give up, even if he was desperate, he couldn't give up.

"Are you crazy?" Because of the conversation just now, all the softness and sadness I had were withdrawn in an instant, and only sharpness and defense were left in my heart. What does Heaven mean to me? He is my life, snatch heaven, how can it!

Peng Zhen turned his head away from me, "I'm crazy, I've been crazy like a fool for two years, but I'm a madman, heaven is also my son, I will never give up my responsibility as a father, and I will never allow others to perform my father's duties for me!" ”

"Peng Zhen!" I screamed!

Peng Zhen turned his head to look at me, with resolute determination, "You, I want it." Kid, I want it too. But if you have really decided to abandon me, then I ...... Accept it, but child, no matter what, I can't give it up! ”

"You might as well kill me directly!" I was furious.

If you want to snatch Heaven, you might as well kill me as soon as possible.

Peng Zhen stared at me, "Believe me, I want to kill my own heart, much more than you." But I can't die, I still have you, and heaven, how can I be willing to die. I'm dead, what are you going to do? Ye Gaochi will have his own family sooner or later, Jin Ge...... He's not bad. But my woman and child, why should I take care of him! ”

I gasped, my mind full of thoughts about how quickly I could calm down. Can't be messy, can't be messy at a time like this.

Try to keep yourself calm, I said to Peng Zhen: "Don't be stupid, heaven gives it to you, what are you going to do with him?" Can you never get married? You yourself know that it is impossible, the Peng family's only hope now is you, if you don't get married for heaven, they will see heaven as a thorn in the side and a thorn in the flesh. But what if you get married? So what has become of heaven? Will your future wife be able to tolerate him? Even if your wife doesn't mind, how is Heaven going to deal with herself? He is so sensitive, he can feel the slightest malice, and such a depressing environment will ruin him! ”

Peng Zhen's entire face was tense, as if it would crack in the next moment.

His whole body was like a bow, like it was about to explode and break in the next moment.

I sighed, "Peng Zhen, facing reality, you can't give us a stable life." And I can't forgive those pasts. I can let go of it in order to live better, not that I don't mind, those who have hurt me, I don't want to give them any kindness. I will not forgive the person who killed my mother, good and evil will be rewarded in the end, I am waiting for that day! ”

Peng Zhen said that he and Ye Gaochi Jinge sent me to hell, but in fact, it was not exactly, what happened back then, Peng Zhen's mother, Peng Zhen's grandfather who never showed up, and even Peng Lei's mother, one counts as one, and the people of the Peng family almost joined forces to destroy us.

I now choose to let go of the past, because I want to live a more sunny life, but this does not mean that I will forgive the hurt I have done, the people of the Peng family, I don't want to see each other again in this life, and even, I will quietly watch their future, watch coldly, and wait quietly.

I broke away from Peng Zhen and pushed the door to get out of the car, although I still had an unchangeable softness and distress for Peng Zhen.

But when I think of those people, I still feel a strong disgust in my heart, so that I can't feel at ease when I am in the same space with Peng Zhen.

This time, Peng Zhen didn't stop me, but whispered when I got out of the car: "Lin Fang, I will never give up!" ”

I quickened my pace.

At the moment, I have only one thought, and that is heaven.

I want to hold Heaven in my arms and never leave me for a moment.

My heaven......