Day42—The courage to survive

Core inhibition of the day before menstruation...... Especially after yesterday's Lidella big trouble in the training department, the atmosphere and situation between the staff of the whole facility began to become more and more subtle, not only everyone looked at us, but also reflected in the attendance and listening attitude of the training activities, even if Marx led the training department to prepare very seriously every day, but the actual marginal benefits are becoming more and more obvious, the hall from overcrowded, gradually full, and finally left to about seventy, and the front row is always those familiar faces.

But on the other hand, we have gained a loyal following, while those who don't care have to face the usual brutal threats...... All in all, the demonstration effect will gradually take effect, and perhaps it should not be so pessimistic.

But the negative impact of the past two days cannot be ignored, not to mention the R&D department, where the containment team has completely ignored any calls from the training department or Marx himself, and is wholeheartedly under the pomegranate skirt of Angela - or more likely Minister Binah, the corrections department must be more difficult to contact after yesterday's incident, the central headquarters is still deeply divided, and the welfare department is still wavering - in general, there is no optimism.

In reality, it was a little more serious than I thought......

At some point today, Gregory and I were walking side by side in a hallway that seemed to never end. Normally, receiving instructions from Minister Netzach of the Ministry of Security to go to the office of the Minister of Security to obtain internal information from the Department of Security should have been a joyous task, but as we were on our way, there was no relief or joy on our faces......

There was no other reason than that when we actually found the minister, who was often drugged and delirious, he did not show up in the office as expected, but sat like a dog around the corner of the hallway, his mouth full of inexplicable gibberish.

"Minister?" I poked at the enkephalin-infused mechanical body with some impatience, but the Minister was clearly in complete madness, just instinctively looked at us, and fell into the pleasure of the chemical again.

"It's really hopeless......" I frowned, not hiding the disdain in my mouth: "I originally thought that the core suppression would change in the future......"

"Uh-huh......" Gregory seemed uncomfortable when he heard this: "You also know the ability of enkephalins, it is almost impossible to quit naturally, and you have to rely on very extreme means to get rid of it, and our minister ...... He simply had no way to control himself. ”

"That being said...... "I said," I said, and a myriad of painful memories of hallucinogenic post-ghost ecstasy and seizures flew out of my mind, "but no matter what, he made our work very difficult." ”

Gregory was also silent at this time, which was also true, he raised his head, looked around slightly, and said, "The minister's office is not far away, let's go and have a look first." ”

"Well, let's do it first." I nodded, followed in Gray's footsteps, and walked towards the office.

"Your department's containment team...... I don't have drugs. On the way, I asked Gray tentatively.

"No, not one." Without thinking, he replied, "But civilian...... In particular, those who often walk around the minister are basically contaminated, which always gives me a headache. ”

"It seems that enkephalins are the crux of the matter – keeping the Department of Security at odds with Marx's strategy." I pondered for a moment and said.

"Hmm...... Truly. Gray agreed.

"Strange to say......" I asked, frowning, "the training department has been transformed by Marx into this, so where did they get the enkephalin?" It is important to know that the energy enkephalins produced by the work of the anomalies need to be refined layer by layer before they can be transformed into medicinal products, and the refining work is not at all within the scope of the Department's work. ”

Gregory frowned, "I'm also curious, I haven't been able to find a clue before, but now...... I have a guessing direction. As he spoke, he couldn't help but look to the side.

"You mean...... Does Angela still have an R&D department? I asked quietly.

Gray nodded, "We've all been involved in EGO-related work in the R&D department, and enkephalin is one of its by-products, even if it's not as much and pure as the Anomaly, but it's more than enough to supply one department after processing." He said.

"It's just that there's not quite enough evidence yet, isn't it......"

"Well, but it won't be long before everything falls out." Gray said confidently.

The office was very close, and before I could speak, I had already stepped into the door of the minister's office. When I looked up, the scene in front of me was the same as ever: crooked tables and chairs, pungent smells, random piles of papers, and a clerical office rolling on the ground, the whole space looked like a bad garbage dump.

"Damn...... It's not a taste every time you come. I tried to fan my nose, but it didn't ease the pain of the strange smell in the room, so I had to stop there, turn on the ventilation system to maximum power, and wait outside the door for half a moment, so that my brain finally didn't have to suffer from the smell anymore.

"Without further ado, let's find it now." I said to Gray, "You search over there, I'll look over here." ”

"Hmm." Gray nodded, and immediately plunged into the search for the chip.

Although we had been mentally prepared in advance, it was still far more difficult than we expected, searching every drawer of the desk, sorting through the mountains of documents one by one, and even cleaning the floor and trash cans, but we found nothing. Seeing that it was past dinner time, Gray and I both felt a little agitated, "Damn, where the hell did this thing go?!" I gritted my teeth and complained dissatisfied.

"Or ...... Look at this kid? Gray said, turning to the groggy clerk to the side.

"Is there any way to wake him up?" I asked, squinting.

"It doesn't seem like there'......" he said, shaking his head.

"Hmm!" Suddenly, just as we were about to give up, the guy himself screamed as if he had been stimulated by something, and then began to scratch the floor like an orangutan like crazy, and then began to cry again, sad but extremely funny.

"This guy is running out of medicine." I covered my face and said, sighing, "Maybe I'll be able to say a couple of words later." ”

Gregory agreed, but he seemed to be more impatient than I was: he stepped forward and picked the man up, and after waving his hand to his face several times, the man finally came to his senses from the pain on his face and the fear that hung in the air...... "Gray ...... Mistress Gray! Spare your life! Spare your life! He hurriedly said that his panicked appearance looked like a lost old dog.

Walter ...... Who made your kid take drugs during work hours? Gray asked, with a black line on his face.

"Spare your life...... Spare your life, this thing...... It's coming up, and no one can stop it. The civilian named Walter replied tremblingly, "You can do whatever you want me to do, please raise your noble hand...... Bypass me. ”

"Shh Gray threw the guy to the ground unhappily and let him lie down and roll around twice before Walter finally staggered to his feet.

"What if you hurt the chip?" I glared at Gray fiercely, "Are you relieved to fall on him?!" ”

Gray didn't answer directly, but he didn't dare to look back, but walked silently towards Walter, raised his head, and with an unusually strong temperament, ready to "interrogate" the poor secretary who was crying.

"Bypass me, I'll never ...... anymore Don't dare to ...... again" Walter saw Gray getting closer and closer, and hurriedly showed that eunuch-like appearance again, which made Gray even more unhappy, "Shut up! He hurriedly told the guy to shut up:

"I ask you, do you know a chip that Netzach is going to hand us over? Approximately the size of a fingernail. Gray said, holding out his right hand to roughly figure out the shape of the chip.

"Core ...... Chip? When Walter heard this, he immediately seemed to have found a life-saving straw, "Chip, right chip!" Minister Netzach told me about it! It's right in ......."

"Where?" Gray hurriedly asked.

"In! After a sweaty and painstaking meditation in ......", this guy finally spit out a few words: "It seems to be ...... I put it on my body and ......"

"And then?" Gray's brow tightened again.

"That's it! At that time, it was almost time to get off work, so I planned to deliver it again tomorrow and then go out today...... I...... I changed into a coat......" the guy said in a staggered voice, his voice getting quieter and quieter, and by the end it was almost inaudible.

"Meaning it's in your dorm room now?" Gray pressed his displeasure and asked again.

"That's right! Must be there! Walter hurriedly answered, "You're sure to find what you're looking for there!" ”

"Tsk......" Gray looked at me with a bitter expression. Let him lead the way. I shook my head and said, "This guy must have nothing to do with Angela." ”

"Lead the way." Gray scolded angrily, leaving Walter trembling in the corner: "Now...... Right now? ”

"Yes, now."

"Good...... Good. Walter hurriedly agreed, looked at us timidly with those shrunken eyes, and said cautiously, "You two...... Please come with me, both of you. ”

After that, our footsteps returned to the hallway, and although the conversation was no longer so personal, the shrugging, tiptoeing, and sinister creature in front of me really piqued my interest, and I decided to learn more about him—in Marx's words, it's called audience research.

I cleared my throat, "Walter? He greeted the guy first.

"Yes! Boss! Walter immediately agreed as if he had been shot, and then resumed his flattering face: "You...... What do you command? ”

I felt sick to my stomach, but I patiently continued to ask, "When did you smoke the green flakes?" Why did you suck it in the first place? ”

"Well...... Ah......h......h That's a long story......" he said tentatively.

"Let's make a long story short."

"Boss, you...... Do you really want to hear it? Walter was still a little skeptical, and said with some embarrassment.

"Less nonsense."

"That'...... That ......"

"Tell me the truth, your little trick can't fool me at all."

"Yes, yes, how dare you ......," Walter hurriedly agreed, stretched out his arm that had been burned by enkephalins for a long time like a withered branch, scratched his messy and sparse hair, closed his eyes, sighed, and finally spoke:

"When I first came to the company, I contracted it, and at that time I was in the security department, because a college classmate who came with me, he joined the containment team, and then died one day while working - he suddenly blew himself up in front of me, and I was very stimulated by this, and then went to participate in the psychological counseling of the training department at that time...... As a result, they sent me a green film, saying that it could relieve pain, and then I didn't know how to use it at the time, and it turned out that I got infected after coming and going, in fact, ...... That's all. ”

The words are very concise, but they are also quite unpretentious. Blows, mental breakdowns, poison to dispel sorrows, and finally no return—such a resume has been as common and full of dust and air as dust and air in the tens of thousands of years of this dungeon—at least until Marx became a returnee and was entrusted with the task, there was not a single corner of this place where there was no trace of the faint green dust of enkephalin lozenges.

"It seems...... This guy was already like this before the cycle officially started. Seeing this, Gray shrugged and said.

I couldn't agree more: "Yes, it doesn't look like a day or two. ”

"I remember you, you participated in the training activities of the training department before, why didn't you come again?" I then asked Walter.

"That day, I just wanted to mix a little enkephalin like before, but who would have thought that there was no intention of giving it at all."

"So you don't go much?"

"Alas...... Boss. Walter frowned and said, "The kind of training used to be useless, and the minister just gave us green films. Now that I don't even give green films, what are you going to do in that kind of place? ”

"At least Marx is really teaching you the art of saving your life, and there are subdivisions according to the grouping of each department." I retorted.

"That'...... Then who knows. When Walter said this, he unconsciously gasped: "A colleague I knew before didn't come back the day before yesterday. ”

Unfortunately, this is a cognitive problem, and it is difficult to change it in the short term. Gray and I looked at each other, ready to switch points.

"Your health is not optimistic."

"Yes...... Ever since I got green flakes, my body has not been as good as before. Walter said stupidly: "It's not like those rich old men, who can go to body transformation or something, how to be high, how to be high,"

"Then why don't you go to the Ministry of Welfare for withdrawal treatment?" I pressed Walter and asked, "With your employee privileges, it must not be difficult. ”

"Alas......" The man was full of sadness again, and once again pulled a long voice to say to me: "Two bosses, please raise your noble hand and don't make things difficult for me again." "You ......" we were about to interject a few words, but before the language could be organized, we were immediately overwhelmed by Walter's continuous complaints: "It is not easy for people to catch their breath, and they have to serve the minister who is confused all day, and they have to deal with the people from the departments below, and they are afraid that one day they will be dragged by the Punishment Department to be the appetizer of those monsters...... Now I am still asked to go to that kind of inhumane treatment, I dare not die, I live with fear and fear, ......"

"But ......" "Just let me be like this, I can be confused and happy every day."

"But that's ...... after all"

"I can't trouble others, I can't trouble others! Please, let me rot alone! Walter's eyes were filled with tears the size of beans as he said this.

At this point, words could no longer shake the creature, and for a moment, all three of them fell into an eerie silence at the same time, walking like shells in the crooked corridor.

Even if you drag this sick body, can't you make him turn back...... I thought to myself, but in the end it was just a slight hypocritical complaint, and for all kinds of physically and mentally exhausted and devastated people in the city, even if the opportunity for change is imminent, who can really grasp it? Who has the courage to grasp it?

Even though almost everyone in the middle of it is expecting a windfall, whether it is unrighteous or not.

At this point, I can't help but wonder again a little about the purpose of everything I am doing at this moment: am I really trying to save others? Even if I witnessed the miserable situation in the back alleys, received a good education in the nest, and even cycled through the dungeon under my feet for tens of thousands of years, how much so-called courage do I have left after all I have experienced?

But for now, I can at least swing my sword for the lives of my companions......

"Old ...... Bosses, we arrived...... Here it is. ”

Finally...... After wandering around the facility for an unknown amount of time, the trio's footsteps stopped, and in the hallway of the dormitories with no end in sight, Walter pointed to a nondescript door and alerted us.

"Hmm." Gray nodded, "Go get it." He sighed.

Walter didn't say much, but expertly read the key, unlocked it, entered the room, and began to search awkwardly through the same chaotic and pungent room as his work area.

"Why did it take so long...... I frowned slightly, "did you find it?" I said as I tried to go inside and look for it, but as I stretched my legs, I suddenly realized that I seemed to have kicked something, so I casually looked down.

"This ...... Seems like a letter? I frowned slightly, obviously there would be no outside correspondence here, and there was rarely such a way for employees to communicate with each other - it could only be an official document from the department, and when I picked up the stack of letters, the seal on the side and back of it also confirmed this: "The red seal is the notice ...... the Corrections Department"

"Punishment...... Punishment ...... Department of Corrections? ”

Unexpectedly, when the words "Disciplinary Department" reached Walter's ears, the man suddenly froze in place as if he had a heart attack, his voice languishing and his movements weak, as if he was about to go to the western sky. "You mean the Corrections Department?!" He asked us in great horror: "Is it really a punishment...... Department of Corrections? ”

"Hey...... Are you okay? Seeing this, Gray hurried forward to try to help the sick fellow from accidents. Woo...... Ahh............h I don't go to the Corrections Department...... Don't go...... Don't go ......."

"It's really hopeless...... I covered my face and sighed, "This is not a formal appointment, just a style warning letter, reminding you to pay more attention to your work attitude." ”

As soon as the words came into his ears, Walter calmed down a lot, but it was still difficult to dispel the sadness, "Oops...... That's about to happen. He muttered breathlessly, "My life will not be long." As he spoke, he trembled again and felt in his pocket, looking for the solace of the hypocrisy that had long been corroded in his heart.

"Damn it...... What are you doing?! Gray immediately grabbed the guy's arm that poked into his pocket, "I know there's a big problem, and you're still thinking about this thing?" ”

"But...... But ......," Walter said in horror, "I...... What else can I do?! ”

"Go to the Ministry of Welfare now for withdrawal treatment!"

"But...... But ......" Walter was still embarrassed when he saw this, and he was unwilling to abandon the pleasure in front of him.

"This time it's a three-level warning, and there will be a two-day observation period next, and if you're still like this, the official appointment will be issued immediately." I carried the letter and reminded him casually.

"Hmm...... Whew......" Walter looked a little shaken, "without this thing, there will be no happiness in the future, nothing will be comfortable, and I will have to work hard." ”

"Maybe the training department can help you then." I hurriedly answered, "At least you won't die in such a mess again." ”

"Or you just wait for the next time and disappear in place, the statute of limitations of the three-level warning is with the employee for a whole employment cycle." Gregory pointed to the unfolded letter and reminded earnestly.

Walter was stunned, but muttered, "I...... I ......"

"You ...... What are you doing? ”

At this moment, a lazy voice came from behind the door, and when he turned to look, it was Minister Netzach.

"This time...... We must be almost asleep......" he asked us.

"Just in time, Mr. Minister, do you have any memory of the Security Department chip? We didn't find it in the office—" I said hurriedly, looking out at the scene, "That's why we're here right now." ”

"Ah...... "Minister Netzach scratched his head, "I sent you a message, and then ...... I forgot to hand over the chip. ”

"Huh?!" Walter suddenly stirred when he heard this: "That...... Didn't you give it to me, Minister? ”

"Well......" Netzach replied apologetically, "it was just an empty container, and I forgot to put the chip in ......"

"Hey!" Walter was immediately full of sorrow when he heard this, and complained with great annoyance: "I would have ...... if I had known."

"Ah......" Seeing this, the minister apologized: "...... I'm sorry for the negligence, next time...... Next time, I'll give you more enkephalins from Angela...... May I? ”

"Hmmm......"

"I'm afraid not, Mr. Minister." Before Walter could reply, I interrupted the conversation between the two of them: "He received a third-level style warning from the Corrections Department today, and I don't think he can continue to indulge like this." ”

"Really...... What a pity...... "Minister Netzach said with some frustration, "Then what should I do to make up for this dereliction of duty......

After hearing this, I swallowed a mouthful of saliva and dared to ask, "Please...... At least stop distributing enkephalins to your subordinates. ”

As soon as the words were spoken, everyone suddenly fell into an unusually awkward silence. While Minister Netzach wasn't an irritable or messy person, I couldn't make an accurate judgment when I was asked to do so, and his mechanical body buried his emotions perfectly in layers of iron, and I felt nervous.

"You...... Why are you bothering about such a thing......" Minister Netzach didn't feel much offended, more confused and puzzled: "...... I didn't say that I would give them the initiative to stuff it...... It's always been that they don't know when they will come to me after they stick to the enkephalin......"

"Hmm...... In short, we will take care of the follow-up matters properly, and we just hope you can ...... Be as helpful as you can. I hurriedly explained: "The security department is an extremely important part of the company's operation, and only by rectifying the problem of enkephalin abuse can we participate in the operation of the entire facility more efficiently." ”

"Hmm......" The minister closed his eyes, these words had indeed caused him to burn out a little, but at least they did understand my purpose, and it was time to change the conversation and go deeper.

"And if possible, as your old subordinate for thousands of years, I sincerely hope that you, the minister himself, can practice and quit enkephalin." I said very seriously.

The same utterance, the same silence.

“…… ......"Minister Netzach was in complete stupor this time, and he didn't seem to be used to the feeling, perhaps by being cared for, perhaps by extra attention...... It's all a call to his emotions that may have worn out in the facility, and a constant challenge to his usual way of being—or maybe it's the pressure of others to allow Minister Netzach to be reluctant to comply to this day......

“…… I...... Me? After a long time, he finally spoke again, asking tentatively.

I nodded, and said earnestly, "I don't know what your working mechanism is, but if it's possible, please do it." ”

Minister Netzach didn't make any objections, he just looked at his familiar and unfamiliar shell at the moment, and pondered for a long time.

“…… You guys...... I probably don't know......," Minister Netzach finally spoke, "and the first person in the whole city to be injected with enkephalin, was me. ”

"Huh!? Is that you......"

“…… The original enkephalin, originally a by-product of the activity of the anomaly, was collected in large quantities by the instrument invented by the [DATA EXPUNGED] research institute because it caused the anomalyte to produce an unstable rejection reaction. But it wasn't until the man left that its purpose was really valued. ”

"That person? Is it Miss ...... [DATA EXPUNGED]? The man who founded the institute. ”

“…… Hmm......" Minister Netzach said this, his expression seemed a little sad: "...... The ...... The man who is also watching us behind the monitor all the time, told me that the enkephalin experiment, and the cogito...... Perhaps this is the key to saving [DATA EXPUNGED], and that nascent project is in dire need of an experimenter......"

"By the way, I was called Giovanni at the time...... But no one remembers the name anymore......"

"So you became the volunteer at that time...... Minister"

"Hmm." "The experiment lasted almost half a year, and every day a variable amount of enkephalin solvent was injected into my body, and at that time it was very different from the fluttering pills now, with no fancy additives, even simple physical contact...... will cause a lot of suffering. I woke up in intense pain countless times, lost consciousness after continuous wakefulness, and even ...... I don't know if it's because of sleepiness or if it's because of the pain to the point of coma......"

"What kind of affection makes you willing to make such a sacrifice......"

"Well......" Minister Netzach sighed, "the thing that brought me so much pain at the beginning is now deep in it, and it affects so many people......," he said, turning his head to Walter and saying, "It may not have been [DATA EXPUNGED] her original intention, and I should have realized it." ”

For a moment, I actually had a trace of respect for the machine box in front of me covered in enkephalins, "Thank you very much." I said, bowing to him with Gray.

"You ...... Don't do that. Minister Netzach said, "It's just...... I no longer want my colleagues to escape reality in this way...... After all, although life is full of pain, there is hope in front of us, so let's ...... Let's live strong together, and find the part in your heart—"

"The courage to survive."

As we returned to the training preparation room with the security chip, it seemed that the burden on our shoulders had weighed a little more, but more importantly, we had gained more.

Gray also decided to quit smoking tomorrow and change his lifestyle, and offered to let me supervise.

And, of course, what the Department of Security has seen today, about our understanding of the current situation -- perhaps there will be more discussion on today's topic.