199 I have deceived myself into believing it
It's not very good to be with a saint - she's so great that she's so small that she shines directly on others. If it's really like this among your colleagues, it's a lethal act, and you dare to do so much better than others in an ordinary workplace? Doesn't that mean that the rest of us are incompetent? Everyone will work together to beat you down. Therefore, to be a human being is to return to the rapids and bravely retreat from the wisdom of the opportunity - but the nature of the work of the storm girl determines that she must be a saint, and her faith determines that she must do her best in everything, because of the doctrine of 'seeing but not saying sin, and not not saying sin', she does all her best to do any good deed.
But she's not stupid.
On the contrary, she can recognize the sinister nature of the world, so she is able to use them wittily to do good, and not be pedantic and nerdy. She understands the psychology of businessmen who regard money as their life, so when she goes to raise money, she talks less about heaven and more about earth. Good deeds bring not only good deeds, but also a considerable amount of gold - and support from the church. She had been in Kanafon for many years, and she had prepared countless gifts for the Patriarch Landun. She knew that this was a waste of life-saving opportunities, but she knew that this was the best way to keep herself in the Patriarchate of Caernarfon for a long time. for she knew that the Patriarch who came again would be no better than her. Since the Light has given you the opportunity, you should cherish being a person who can help others, and will always help others.
In the real world, she is a shrewd scholar and a soft-spoken and intelligent girl, but in the spiritual world, she is as sincere as a baby, believing in the Light almost unthinkingly (fundamentalist purist).
This piece of sincerity had been pried open a small crack not long ago, but this gap was constantly pouring something else into her heart. Today, she is fully aware of her inner world. However, it was too late.
At the end of a tiring day, today is the day of preaching outside the city, and there is a request from the poor dying mother. She begged that her young daughter be admitted to the church orphanage, otherwise she would not be safe to die. So Storm Lady was busy outside the city for another hour, taking a little girl of seven or eight years old to go through the formalities, even if she also had to abide by the strict rules of the Einzberen family, and finally the other party entered the church orphanage. And by the time she was about to go back to tell her mother, she had been dead for a long time.
After the funeral mass for each other again, it was late at night. The gates were opened for her alone, and she returned to the city again.
In the dark night when there was no light, she rode her lean horse: "At this moment...... I'm cumin again. There is no warm family to go back to, and there is no one to confide in. Night has fallen...... Well, it's a certain time of the day!—and I'm going to 'pretend' to be by my side again. ”
This is a habit that Storm Niang developed a few months ago, in fact, it can be said that a few months ago, she finally couldn't bear the strong contrast and was schizophrenic. She can always pretend that she has a friend by her side, not a friend or a friend, but ...... Cybertron.
After the other party planted the cause in herself, he had already made her receive the fruit of desire. But he resolutely left, not cherishing his body at all, as if he was dead - he even killed a Hell Monarch a while ago!
Do you dare to float a little more?
"If you want to feel his warmth, be his companion at this moment - of course, it's impossible!" As a high-ranking clergyman, she was destined not to get married, so every time she thought about it, she would add an impossibility: "I...... You can only live in your own dreams. Alone... Pretending to be there, walking alone with him to the Chapel of the Light. But when he wasn't there, I could feel his hug, and I could close my eyes and get his rescue when I was in the most serious threat to my life. ”
The light rain began to fall gradually in the night, the silver light flashed on the streets, and the few street lamps swayed and shone on the small waterholes—life was like a dream and a fantasy. The leaves of the trees were dotted with stars in the darkness, and I seemed to see us together forever.
But this is imagination, I'm just talking to myself. Also know his family...... But I think there is hope! When the night is over, the world will remain the same.
Back in her little chapel, her bedroom, Milli Ai quietly entered the room. Her house was never locked, and people came in to burglary at first. She always puts a few dollars in the most conspicuous place so that the thief can feed his stomach, and sometimes she remembers the thief's appearance. When the thief left her house, she became a "thief" - entering someone else's home and putting a few more coins and a blessing from the Light in the thief's house. The thief who came home after [work] saw that there were traces of someone entering his home, and shouted that it was stolen, but found Millie's money and blessings - whether he was moved or frightened, he did not dare to be a thief again.
Don't disturb the neighbors who live far away, she goes home alone. He put down the golden staff in his hand. He took off his black patriarch's hat, revealing his beautiful blonde hair. Although it can never be maintained, it looks so beautiful because of the holy light magic in the body.
"Heh, actually, I'm from the Lord of Hell. "Take off your black shawl, take off all your clothes one by one. That graceful body was not naked, but more like a pure soul. But it is undeniable that this is a human body, and many of its functions come from the most primitive physical instincts. The holy soul dominates, but equally noble feelings can also dominate this body.
"I ...... I feel like there's still hope for me. Yes, it's all ...... Blame, Cybertron, he's a ...... Yes, he's a barbarian. He looked at his face with a precious, priceless little mirror from Cybertron. This soul master, who is admired and relied on by thousands of people, has no one to guide his soul at the moment, so he can only take care of himself and fall deeper and deeper: "Since he is a barbarian, since he already has three wives. Now he definitely wants more, it's inappropriate and I have to stop him...... Well, I'm so smart! I'm going to stop him, even if it's 'sacrificing' me. ”
There was a bit of a posture of sacrificing one's life to serve the demons, but at this moment the yearning smile on her face completely betrayed the [excuse] of her righteous words: "I will use my own soul and body to influence him, and conquer him with the teachings of the Holy Light." If he is not satisfied, I will have to satisfy him with myself...... It can't be helped, right? Yes, it's definitely not that I'm in love, it's definitely not that I've broken my vows, it's ...... Teachings of the Light!Self-sacrifice!Yes!--What if the Einzbelen family ceases to do good?What if Caernarfon suddenly turns into hell? Since I am the Patriarch of this place, I am entitled and obliged to prevent such a terrible future from happening!"
"That's right, just like when I became the Patriarch of Carnarvon, sending some money to the south is a sacrifice that cannot be done. This time, since the other party doesn't like money, there is no way to do it-yes, this qiē can't be helped! There is no way-"
I figured out something one night, or finally one of my own personalities, and the storm lady who had hypnotized and assimilated her other personality held her hands together. In fact, it should be said that the two personalities have finally become one, and they must be separated for a long time, and they must be united for a long time to persuade each other, for example, now she looks pious, and she really says very reverently: "Thank you to the Holy Light, thank you to the Holy Light!
It was all her own thoughts, and she had nothing to do with the Light - deep down she knew it. But now, with the deception of the Holy Light, she has deceived herself, and in the near future, she will also approach Cybertron according to the teachings of the Holy Light.