I always feel that no matter how I choose, there always seems to be something regretful.

"Sister is the one in Nanyuan?" Gu Ruoyun asked tentatively, and after seeing the other party nodding, she understood, "But has my sister really thought it through, is this person reliable, if it can't be relied on in the future, isn't it..."

This is what Gu Ruoyun is most worried about, if she goes to a foreign country, then Chu Xin can only rely on that man, if the man is unreliable, what can she do?

"Yes, I'm the same as Ruoyun, that's what I'm worried about" Chu Shu is the same, "But I know that my sister is also reluctant to him, if I miss it, my sister is afraid that she will always remember it." ”

"I know the worries of the two of you, but I don't want to be separated, he will go back to Northern Qi next spring, maybe I will never see him again in my life, and my heart will be half empty."

Chu Xin touched his heart, and felt a little pain at the thought of never meeting him again.

"If my sister really can't give up, then it's better to be bold and take a gamble."

Chu Shu said tentatively, she knew Chu Xin best and knew how much the other party cared about it.

Chu Xin lowered his head and didn't speak, feeling a mess in his heart, every time he mentioned this matter, he would always fall into an endless cycle of chaos, not knowing what to choose.

Maybe you'll have to choose to find out.

"But can my sister afford to gamble?" Gu Ruoyun said worriedly, "Has my sister really made a good choice?" My sister still doesn't know anything about what the situation is in Beiqi, and she went to a completely unfamiliar place, can my sister adapt to it? ”

This is what Gu Ruoyun is most worried about, Chu Xin is a princess here, at least now she doesn't have to worry about food and clothing, but if she goes to Northern Qi, which is thousands of miles away, no one knows what the situation is!

Hearing this, Chu Shu also looked solemn, in fact, several of them knew very well what would happen in their hearts, but many times people's feelings would be more important than reason.

Just like at this moment, Chu Xin still wants to gamble even if she knows this, in fact, when she puts the two choices together, it represents how important Xiao Zhi is in her heart.

Chu Xin was in a daze all day, and he couldn't do anything until he went to Nanyuan in the evening.

"What's going on in your heart?"

Xiao Zhi's eyes were exceptionally bright under the moonlight, and he looked at Chu Xin with such a distressed look, and raised his eyebrows intentionally or unintentionally.

"I can't bear you to go," Chu Xin looked at Xiao Zhi and said aggrievedly, "I've been used to your presence over the years, and if you leave, I still don't know who to talk to."

In fact, I have already prepared in my heart that you are leaving, but when the day of your departure is getting closer and closer, my heart is getting more and more painful. “

"It's okay," Xiao Zhi stepped forward and touched Chu Xin's face to wipe away the tears on his face, "After I go back, I will tell my father my request no matter what, I will definitely say it, I don't want to leave regrets in my heart." ”

Xiao Zhi's appearance is extremely sincere, and the sourness in Chu Xin's heart is getting stronger and stronger.

"I didn't know what to do, this was the first time I felt that it was so difficult to choose, I really didn't know what to do."

Chu Xin retracted into Xiao Zhi's arms and choked quietly, feeling that this was the first time she had made such a difficult choice, whether it was her mother or Xiao Zhi, she was reluctant to do anything.

"Xin'er, believe me, you must believe me, I am willing to use my father's last guilt towards me to fulfill this promise. I don't want to be separated from you, I want to be with you for a long time. I'm in this strange Dachu, the only person who gives me warmth is you, isn't it good for us to warm each other? ”

Xiao Zhi took Chu Xin into his arms and smelled the other party's hair, with a faint fragrance.

"Hmm."

Chu Xin nodded tacitly, thinking that she had already made a decision in her heart.

"I don't want to leave you, if I think that I will never see you again, my heart is hurting, after so many years with you, I have been inseparable from you for a long time."

Chu Xin closed her eyes, but there were still tears flowing down one after another, she was silently prepared in her heart, but thinking of her mother who raised her, she was still very sour.

Xie Ruya still waited until Chu Xin came back as usual before falling asleep peacefully, her only hope was that this daughter could live well.

Chu Yu's body has been much better these days, and he has always been thinking more and more about the past during this time, and he knows how much he owes Chu Xin, his daughter.

asked people to bring Chu Xin over, and this was the first time he looked at this daughter who owed a lot so carefully and carefully.

"I wonder what happened to my father?"

Chu Xin said indifferently, when the palace people came, she was still a little dazed, she didn't expect it to be her father's intention, so she was very awkward at the moment, and she didn't know what to do.

He has always been very unfamiliar with this father, and the only thing he remembers is that when he was a child, he held Chu Yi high above and watched him crawl on the ground like a kitten and a puppy.

"I have often thought of your mother these days, and I think that you look very similar to your mother, and today I see you in a trance and remember the picture of me and your mother together many years ago."

Chu Yu squinted, recalling the picture in his mind, Mu Wan was a dignified and gentle woman, but her daughter looked extremely cold, and her eyes were completely indifferent.

In fact, if you think about it, he didn't pay anything to this daughter, and of course his daughter was extremely indifferent to him.

"My biological mother is long gone, she died in the cold palace, and that was many years ago."

The corners of Chu Xin's mouth hooked sarcastically, if you said that you would have done something earlier, you only needed one sentence to get your mother out of the cold palace, and your mother would not die now, what is the use of pretending to miss it

What's more, isn't there a more favorite concubine around after so many years, how could a concubine think of her biological mother, all of this feels ironic.

"I know that you should have a grudge in your heart, after all, I owe you something, but after so many years, my heart will change, and I want to compensate you if I owe you."

Maybe it was because of the period of illness, Chu Yu felt that his heart was softer, or maybe it was easy to compensate the princess, at most, it was to help choose a good husband, which was easy to do.

After all, he really never really cared about Chu Xin's daughter, even if he realized that he owed Chu Xin at this moment, he just wanted to make his heart feel better.

The only daughter he really loves is Chu Yi, and it is already good for the emperor to have one or two favored children, he has many children, and if there are so many outstanding ones, he will naturally give a few more eyes.

Chu Xin is really inconspicuous in the harem, if he hadn't felt that he owed Mu Wan too much recently, he really wouldn't have thought of Chu Xin.

Chu Xin didn't speak, but suddenly had some thoughts in his heart, thinking of the words that were so inseparable from Xiao Zhi last night, his heart beat faster and faster.

She hadn't really explained these things to her mother, but she didn't dare to say it, for fear of seeing her mother's reluctant and disappointed eyes.

It's just that he has to make a decision, it will be next year's spring, and then Xiao Zhike will really leave, and they will really never see each other again.

"Father," Chu Xin opened his mouth and said these two unfamiliar words softly, "I do have one thing, I hope my father can fulfill it." ”

After finishing speaking, Chu Xin closed her eyes and opened them again soon, she knew that she had already chosen, so she had to take responsibility for this choice.

Xie Ruyan was waiting for Chu Xin to come back with a worried face, I don't know what happened suddenly, His Majesty asked people to bring Chu Xin over, it was really a little inexplicable, and he waited for a long time to see that the person came back before he was relieved.

"Your Majesty, is there anything you want to tell you? How could someone suddenly bring you over? ”

Xie Ruya stepped forward and took Chu Xin's hand and sat down, and asked with a concerned face, and could see that the other party's face was not good, could it be that he was talking about something?

"Mother doesn't have to worry, it's nothing serious."

Chu Xin felt a little confused all the way back after saying that, she didn't expect that she would really make this choice, is a person really worthy of the mother who raised her?

"Mother, although I am not your daughter, I can feel that you really treat me as if I were your own daughter, and I can feel your love for me."

Originally, on the way back, my heart was very sour, so I really couldn't help it at this moment, Chu Xin threw herself into Xie Ruyan's arms and cried loudly.

It turned out that she would really make this choice, it turned out that she would really say it, and at this moment she really felt as if she had failed her mother's loving heart.

All the memories came flooding back, and she suddenly thought of the days when she was a child in the cold palace, when she was still very young and was always easy to be bullied by those waste concubines.

Later, when I saw my mother so fierce and murdered those waste concubines back, I felt that this woman seemed to be very powerful, if he followed this woman, he wouldn't be bullied, right?

Indeed, with her mother's blessing, she did not suffer so many grievances.

Later, after the death of her biological mother, she and her mother were completely dependent on each other, thinking that she was about to forget this time, but she didn't expect to remember it clearly at this moment.

The days of starvation and freezing in the cold palace suddenly became so clear, and suddenly I remembered my mother's hands that were red from the cold when she washed her clothes, and those charcoal fires, those boards, all the memories became clear.

"Don't cry, what the hell happened, did Your Majesty reprimand you?"

Xie Ruya patted Chu Xin's back worriedly, she really couldn't figure out what was going on, seeing Chu Xin crying so aggrieved, she had a bad premonition in her heart.

Chu Xin has always been very sensible, he has never cried like this, something very serious must have happened.

"Mother, if I make a choice, will you blame me?"

Chu Xin closed her eyes, she felt that she was probably an ungrateful white-eyed wolf at the moment, her mother had worked hard to raise her, but she chose the other side, and suddenly felt so ashamed.

What kind of good daughter is she?

"What?" Xie Ruyan hadn't reacted at first, but after thinking about it a little, she could know what Chu Xin was talking about.

"Don't cry, don't cry, no matter what choice you make, I will support you, I am not your biological mother in the end, I did not conceive and give birth to you in October, I only have the grace of nurturing you."

There were some tears in Xie Ruya's eyes, and she probably understood what Chu Xin was talking about.

In fact, she is already prepared for this in her heart, and she can't accompany Chu Xin for a lifetime, even if she is Chu Xin's biological mother, she must learn to let go, and she must be prepared for her daughter to get married.

It's just that I didn't expect this day to come so quickly, as if I saw Chu Xin yesterday that she was still that little girl, and today she has grown so big and has her own opinions.

"I know what you're talking about, it doesn't matter, people have to grow up after all, after all, they have their own ideas and choices, you learn to make your own choices, I'm really gratified.

I never blame you, it's just that you choose this kind of life, and you have to take it on and make yourself as good as possible no matter what. “

Xie Ruyan stretched out her hand to wipe the tears on her face, and babbled about her worries.

In fact, this is very good, it is a good thing that Chu Xin can have her own ideas when she grows up, not to mention that she should have confidence in Chu Xin, since she has chosen this, she will definitely be able to live a good life

"Thank you mother, my mother is really kind to me and really loves me."

Chu Xin knew very well that his mother must have understood what he was talking about, so he felt more and more ashamed.

She is not her mother's biological daughter, but her mother still loves her like a real mother.

How can she enjoy this love?