After seeing Lixue leave, although I was late for self-study last night, I could use the excuse that the physics teacher asked the class representative to count the physics exercises.

I've always been quite confident in my ability to concentrate on something, so I have been writing homework in the evening self-study, and I can't help but think about things that have nothing to do with studying. Until I get home, the environment is quiet and my brain is free. I was lying on the bed, my eyes closed, but my mind was full of the process of sending the snow today.

I can roughly guess the reason, whether it is personality or appearance, I am not suitable for this kind of person, she is a very attractive girl to me. She opened my heart and kept me away from the overly paranoid high school life (although I still feel like getting good grades is still my main priority), and the closeness and the upcoming placement made my heart tingle even more. (Lu Lianxue's science grades are poor, but her math scores are good, and she has a certain advantage in literature, and she will most likely part ways with me.) ）

1 day away from the monthly exam.

The same middle school life has come again, especially the days when Rei Xue is not there, which makes me more aware of this. Although I have always studied hard to study for the shackles of being admitted to the university, her appearance seems to be a light, a unique light that shines in this boring daily life.

After the evening self-study, even though the bed at home was like an oasis in the Sahara Desert for me after a tiring day at school. But that night was the first time I had insomnia since I was in high school. I knew that the next day was going to be the monthly exam, but that night I was lying in bed with my eyes closed and not asleep.

Monthly exams.

I haven't slept all night, but I am more energetic, and the phrase "I have survived the fire" is often used to describe my state.

I don't plan to prepare for the next exams. So I just closed my eyes and rested. I don't know how long later, I fell asleep on the table.

"At half past seven, I'm going to the exam room!"

A very familiar and gentle voice gently woke me up, and I recognized that the source was the "culprit" I had been thinking about day and night for the past few days.

"How's it going?" I couldn't fully open my eyes because they were still adjusting. Suddenly, a mild, irony thing rubbed against it.

"I didn't call you when you were sleepy like this, I bought you coffee, I'll come on later!"

"Well, you too."

Two days after the end of the monthly exam.

The results of the monthly exam are usually completed after two days, which is an opportunity for me to work hard, and I can use this paper to help Lianxue improve her science scores, so that if she can improve the results of her final exams, it may affect her final choice of arts and sciences.

The results of the monthly exam were unexpectedly good, and this was the first time I won the first place in high school, although the level of the key class was not too high, but I still entered the top 20 of the grade.

In order to hide the abruptness of my purpose, I will use this result as a starting point.

"Uh-huh, mercy," she turned her head as I pulled out my transcript (as a physics class representative, I could have gotten the full transcript earlier.) "Do you want to look at the grades? ”

"Oh, good~"

"Do you want me to help you make up for physics? Hmph, my physics is pretty good. ”

She didn't speak, just smiled softly and nodded. For a moment, I vaguely felt as if my intentions had been revealed, so I simply said frankly, "Chemistry and biology are okay, you have to work hard, you don't like liberal arts, and I want to continue to be classmates with you in all studies。。。。。。 Thanks to my rationality, I realized that I was in the classroom, and quickly stopped, "Really, work hard, I will do what I can." ”

"Well, I'll try, so please."

In the days that followed, I basically stopped working so hard to give lectures to other students, (although it was sad, but from junior high school until recently, I have been filling my inferiority complex with the praise I received for "selling my knowledge", forming a psychology that I also have a need and a desirable place.) More than half of my time after class and after the end of the evening self-study was reserved for Lixue. There are also some rumors of gossip circulating in the class, and I don't think it matters, but I hope that those rumors will come true directly (abandoning shame, breaking the jar, and at the same time I kind of want to see how she reacts. ）

Our relationship is really getting closer, and we used to only occasionally sit together in the hall and eat at the same table. That month, the two of us spent more time alone than before, and after the evening self-study at 9.30, I usually stayed with her until 10 o'clock, when the dormitory students turned off the lights.

That's right, she works hard, and I do my best. But the heavens generally do not grant people's wishes. On the one hand, I have to talk about it from a very basic point, she has fallen a lot. On the other hand, she would only honestly study science when I was supervising, otherwise she would run to read math problems and even want to tell me. Occasionally, out of crooked thoughts, I would seem to listen to her math honestly, but in fact, I would stare at people's faces for a while.

Mid-January 2017.

Final exams are over.

The time of a month is like a white horse, but every minute and second of free time is the time we weave together. I have reached the point where I know her level well, even though the report card has not yet come out, but based on the difficulty of this test paper, I have already guessed a rough idea.

In the porch of the teaching building, I didn't say much, silently took out my favorite yoha, took out my favorite yoha-flavored hard candy, silently took her hand, and poured one into her palm.

She didn't speak, just wordlessly peeled off the candy and put it in her mouth, and I helped her push the suitcase to the school gate. Then leaned against the concrete wall of the security room. Just there watching her back.

After seeing her go, I knew that the grief of this moment had to be borne by someone else.

That night, I went to an Internet café with Ye Qing and Tingyu, watched a movie, and finally my emotions exploded in the square of Changchun City. I told my best friends about the unwillingness and sadness in my heart, and the bits and pieces of pity in my mind.

Lying in bed, my heart ached as if it were being pulled, but I knew that the sun would still rise the next day. I can't forget the night when I exchanged goodnight with her, ate with her on opposite sides of the same table, talked with her, and complained about ACG。。。。。。

Every time I close my eyes, the time we weave together flashes through my mind like a marquee, her looks, her sweet voice, her tenderness will tug at my heartstrings.

I don't know when I fell asleep with exhaustion and no dreams.

Late January 2017

Before returning to school to get my grades and announcing the holiday, maybe because of the peace of mind brought by chatting with Reyuki, or maybe because I came up with the idea of conveying my heart to her, I didn't indulge in sadness all the time, but looked forward to the next few days.

On the day she returned to school, her science grades did improve, but her grades in 60-70 in all subjects, coupled with her lack of English and mathematics, and the advice of her relatives, she tended to choose liberal arts. Maybe there was a psychological expectation, maybe the idea of confessing to her was stronger, and I didn't have much reaction to this ending.

After discussing with Ye Qing and Tingyu, although they suggested that I should ask Lianxue to go out to play first, in order to set off the atmosphere, and finally decide the winner.

However, because of my shyness and the shyness of taking girls out, I rejected the proposal, and decided to go straight to Chinese New Year's Eve.

Chinese New Year's Eve.

I'm more obsessed with 10 points. As the minutes ticked by, my heart didn't slow down for a moment.

"Lianxue, you have colored my gray high school life, for half a year, thank you. I want to witness more colors with you, and continue to weave our time with you. "I sent her the cine in cryptic words.

"Me too, please take care of me for the next year." I was sure when I saw her reply, either she was playing haha, or I was talking too vaguely.

It's true that I can accept it now when I see it, knowing that in her heart, I have a certain status, but I am not reconciled, I am willing to gamble at the moment without cowardice, although there is little hope (she is the flower of Kaolin, for me this has never changed, after all, even my confidence is supported by the so-called value of high school students - grades. But I don't want to admit that irreplaceable time was given away. (Just like the person who buys a lottery ticket, although he says that it is impossible to win the lottery, if he does not have a trace of fantasy, how can he be willing to spend this "unjust money"). I must have acted on it with a fantasy in mind. "Let's try to get along!" When I came to my senses, I sent it.

I don't know if it's because I didn't see it or because I don't know what to reply, but there is only silence that accompanies the frozen time.

In the next moment, the vibration of my phone made my heart feel like a flood pouring into my body. "Thank you for being able to convey your heart. But sorry, not right now. I don't know how to deal with this, but at this stage, I guess I have to learn. ”

I just struggled to squeeze out the "um" first, and just as I was subconsciously trying to keep the last relationship between us, I spoke first.

"But tonight's incident won't affect our relationship!" Maybe I will contact the previous words

, I feel that the girl who said this sentence is a green tea nine times out of ten. If rejection was expected, then I'm sure she, who spent all those times together, would never want to ruin the relationship. "Could you please stay with me for a while?"

Her words came to such an extent that I subconsciously didn't want to end like this even more, "Well, I understand. ”

The "vaccinations" that I kept giving myself before the start of the program took effect. The sense of loss after being rejected was not so strong, but it made me less reluctant to face the assignment before.

I breathed a sigh of relief that I wasn't the type to be obsessed with or die. This will also bother the other person, and it is likely that the last shred of hope or favor will be consumed.

Then, according to the practice of holidays (overhauls and festivals), I greeted the poems with cold and warmth. But I didn't want to tell her about it.

0:00 on Chinese New Year's Eve.

Best friends, we know each other too well, but we never send holiday wishes, and we often meet and feel that this kind of blessing is very awkward.

I tried to keep the gloom in my heart from leaking to my parents, but from what I knew about them, they could see that something was on my mind, and they were waiting for me to tell them in person. And I still tried to make it look natural to greet them with New Year's greetings.

"Happy New Year!" Just when I wanted to use Cine to send blessings to Shibai and Rei Xue respectively.

Mercy sent in advance, "Happy New Year, although it is Chinese New Year's Eve, there is no need to keep the New Year, remember to rest early." "I understood the reason why she was more active than usual – she was tempting, testing my attitude.

And I understood this, "Well, you too, don't stay up late, don't mind so much, you see I'm a strong person after all!" ”

"Hmm."

Shibai's side is as full of gushing as ever, and I can be regarded as a little comfort to me in such a situation.

Spring 2017.

Changchun No. 2 Middle School ushered in the second semester, and it is also the upcoming semester of arts and sciences.

There is neither a qualitative leap nor a crash-like decline in the relationship between Lixue and me. We're still the same, she still talks to me, I still call her intimacy, but this routine hasn't changed much until the day of the assignment.

Split day.

"Riki Sonata Science Class 3"

"Trolling Snow Liberal Arts Class 4"

But in fact, the teacher pronounced a lot of names, and I only paid attention to me and her.

"Okay, let's take action, there's nothing to remember, please continue to work the road of your dreams."

I was touched by what the teacher said. But my reluctance cannot be described in words.

In the hallway, next to the cupboards.

"Relianxue, I'm leaving." Needless to say, I knew that my eyes must have been full of praying for her.

"Okay, it's just a class, I'll message you every day if I'm free at school."

"What if you're not available?" She was amused by the pitiful look in my eyes and the outrageous words she was now saying.

"Even if the school is not available, I will at least send you a message for minor repairs. Besides, you don't have to help me deposit some money in the bank every now and then. Don't we also have to "connect" from time to time? (The school theoretically does not allow mobile phones, so scanning the code to pay basically does not work, and then eating at school and buying things in the school supermarket rely on meal cards, and the recharge of meal cards is cash, and Lixue lives on campus, so if you want to shop online and the like, you need to rely on me to help her save money.) ）”

I couldn't help but laugh when I heard the words she used to describe the meeting.

I originally wanted to help Lianxue move down, but the squad leader was quick, and I didn't regret it, but I felt that it solved my troubles. (On the one hand, I do want to help her move books, but on the other hand, maybe it's my inferiority complex, maybe I care about other people's eyes, and I'm still embarrassed to get close to girls in front of other students.) ）

In the afternoon, it snowed heavily.

Therefore, because of the weather, day students do not study at night.

Walking on the road, I was more distracted, thinking about nothing and thinking about everything.

After finishing my homework in the evening, it wasn't until the news of the snow that my mind completely calmed down.

Summer 2017.

After the class, in addition to the more intense coursework, the competition is also more intense. (In the newly divided science class, students will pick out some of the key classes that will be promoted to high school, and will also pick out a few of the higher grade rankings from the regular version.) ）

Therefore, the number of times I go out of the classroom every day is only a handful, and I go out early and return late with the blackboard that gets along day and night, and the teacher, a single life, which can be maintained by myself and the teacher who keeps drawing cakes for myself, and is full of thoughts about the so-called bright future.

Occasionally, I would go to the supermarket on campus to buy something to eat to make up for the sin of sleeping until 10 minutes before morning self-study without eating breakfast.

I was casually looking for the best value for money bread on the shelves, and the shelves weren't very high, so I could easily look over the top of the shelves.

The school rules of Changchun No. 2 Middle School are still relatively strict, which is in stark contrast to No. 1 Middle School. On the one hand, breaks are drastically compressed and often mixed with a large number of exams. On the other hand, there is the dress code.

No. 2 Middle School strictly requires students to wear school uniforms from Sunday to Friday, and set aside one day on Saturday for students to change and wash school uniforms, which means that school uniforms can be worn on campus on Saturday.

As if to rest my brain and not concentrate on actively receiving information, my eyes were scattered, and even though I was wearing private clothes, I could still recognize the image that caught my eye.

The boring daily life, and her chance encounter in school, are like a few osmanthus flowers, mixed in a latte with only milky fragrance and bitterness. Although it is rare and looming, it can be barely enjoyed by savoring it.

Throughout the beginning, I may have been a little inflated because of her favor and enthusiasm, but I have always had a clear understanding of my own positioning. Maybe I'm embarrassed, maybe I'm humble, I can't just say hello.

While she was picking something, I hurriedly carried what I wanted to buy, and arrived at the cashier before her.

"Ahh Hearing a familiar voice, I turned around and made it all right.

I couldn't help but snap in her outfit as if it were a scan.

The dark green strap dress wraps around the white shirt worn inside, and the hem of the dress is two-layered, the dark green outer layer wraps around the black inner layer, and the part that grows out of the dark green outer layer is black lace edge. The slightly tight clothes highlight the slenderness of the figure, but the height of 172 makes her feel very petite. The shawl hair is also scattered, and a tuft of it is picked out and tied with a hair tie and then worn with a bow hair ornament.

"Hmph, if you only know how to stare back, you can't take the initiative to praise me."

"There's a word for it, it's self-evident." I smiled at her.

"Then the next time you see me, quickly cover your eyes with your hands, don't look at it." She stuck her tongue out at me.

"Good, good, well, well, it's beautiful and cute." I'm really running out of words.

"Oh, I know you're running out of words."

After small talk, he returned to the classroom full of only two kinds of people—except for those who were lying on the desk, and those who were straight and unwilling to let go of the pen in their hands for a moment.

But the short time just now gave me a lot of energy, and I was able to continue to endure the boring life with the spirit.