The world is unsatisfactory, nine times out of ten.

Squatting in the hollow of a giant tree in the jungle, Chen Yu crossed his arms and knees, looking at the big dung outside the cave, with a regretful expression.

After shredding the corpse.

Smashed.

Cooked.

Digestion.

Excretion......

and other "refreshes".

In the end, he didn't get the tanuki's "gigantic" ability either.

"Ugh."

Sighing deeply, Chen Yu fiddled with the wooden stick in his hand and kept poking the poop outside the hole.

Although I have known for a long time that it is difficult to "burst" the desired skill in just two or three refreshes with ordinary "title change".

But he still had some hard time accepting it.

It's getting bigger!

That's getting bigger!

What man wouldn't covet this kind of magic skill?

“……”

After being silent for a long time, he threw away the stick, opened the backpack with sharp eyes, took out the insulated pot that had once filled the "pig brain" from it, and carefully filled all the poop into it.

Well sealed.

Guaranteed not to be leaked.

He didn't believe that after the dead body had been turned into shreds, rotten meat, and then into dung, there was no other way to process it.

Didn't his previous titles also include [expired feces], "garbage", "dirty garbage", "not as good as garbage", etc., etc.?

In short, the tanuki alien's "get bigger" ability, he must copy.

Because if this move is matched with [Power of Warcraft], it will definitely increase its combat effectiveness!

The six-armed god of war with a height of more than 1,000 meters......

Chen Yu couldn't help but drool just by thinking about that picture in his mind.

Wiping the corners of his mouth with the back of his hand that had not touched the stick, he cherished the "thermos pot" back into his backpack and began to sort out his next plans.

First of all, digging graves offended the human high-level, and killing cats offended the foreign high-level, and with his current ability, he simply could not cope with the possible revenge of the two.

Especially the unimaginable power of the latter, he is destined to break with the entire world of all races.

However, his family is still in the capital.

So he could only take the risk and choose to kill back.

"Trouble."

Scratching his head, Chen Yu began to sort out his three gains today.

The same is the soul bead, a total of 143.

The same is an artifact, a total of three pieces.

Finally, there is the Divine Decree.

Putting aside the soul beads and holy decrees for the time being, Chen Yu directly took out three pocket-sized luminous props from his bag and studied them carefully.

According to his current knowledge, no matter how he looked at it, these three luminous objects belonged to the category of "artifacts".

But due to his poor family since he was a child, Chen Yu still doesn't understand how to use these things.

"Recite a mantra?"

"Or the Infusion Ability Origin......"

Muttering, he subconsciously urged the energy in his body to conduct the energy into a glowing horn through the technology of "ability conduction".

Immediately, the dazzling brilliance blooms!

The horn, which was originally the size of a palm, swelled in an instant.

And accompanied by black smoke, a scarf wrapped around its head and dressed as a bizarre illusory creature "drilled" out of the horn.

The gusts of forest wind blew, causing the translucent body to dissipate and condense from time to time.

"Bang dang."

Chen Yu was stunned, dumbfounded.

"Hello, my new master, did you wake me up?" The illusory creature writhed its body inside the black smoke, its face full of peace.

"What are you?!" Chen Yu got up in shock.

"I am Aladdin...... God"

"Aladdin's magic lamp!" Chen Yu's pupils shrank suddenly.

"Aladdin." The illusory creature corrected: "You can call me a god." ”

"God ......" Chen Yu was at a loss.

"Yes, Trumpet." The trumpet god smiled and nodded: "You wake me up and become my new master." I can ......."

"Help me make my wish come true?!" Chen Yu answered again in surprise.

Trumpet: "I can tell you a story." ”

Chen Yu: "......"

Trumpet: "Why do you have such an unrealistic idea as 'making a wish'?" ”

"And what are you used for...... Only storytelling? ”

"yes."

"That's a fart!" Chen Yu roared.

"Don't say that." The god was shy: "My story is not an ordinary story. ”

Hearing this, Chen Yu was stunned for a moment, and then thought for a moment: "Could it be that your 'story' has some kind of causal effect?" ”

"That's what you understand, and that's right!" The god proudly puffed up his big belly.

"it!" Chen Yu was shocked: "So awesome?!" ”

"yes!" The trumpet god was triumphant: "Because my stories are all funny stories, as soon as I tell them, you will laugh at the master." It does have a causal effect. ”

Chen Yu: "......"

Chen Yu: "You and I are farting." ”

"Director, it seems that you still don't understand. Well, I'll tell you about one now. The god put his hands behind his back, his illusory figure shook in a trance, and after a while, Lang Lang spoke: "Once upon a time, there was a person named Confucius. One day, he saw two children. ”

Chen Yu: "......"

God: "......"

Chen Yu: "......"

The god hesitated: "Master, you... Why don't you laugh. ”

Chen Yu: "I'm laughing at you for being paralyzed." ”

"Ah...... So, what, the owner may not understand. The god nervously explained: "Isn't there an allusion in ancient times, is it Confucius who saw two children arguing about the day?" This is not a debate, but a defecation. ”

Chen Yu: "And then." ”

Trumpet God: "...... And then isn't it ridiculous? ”

Stood still, silent for a long time.

Chen Yu looked around and looked for the weapon in hand: "Do you know how to destroy the artifact?" ”

"Don't! Host... Don't be a host! Calm down! The god of trumpets broke out in a cold sweat.

"So your use, just telling jokes to others?"

"If you want me to tell someone, I... I can talk about that too. ”

“…… Get lost. ”

"Understood!"

The trumpet god was excited, and quickly turned into black smoke and disappeared into the horn.

The horn, which had grown larger, was retracted back to its original size.

Bending down and picking up the glowing horn, Chen Yu resisted the urge to crush it, put it back in his backpack, and picked up the second artifact, the pipa.

The familiar car was poured into the source of the ability again, and this small pipa also grew bigger in an instant.

It became a normal-sized one - a lute.

Holding it in his hand, Chen Yu tentatively plucked the strings.

"Buzz ......"

Immediately emit a pleasant movement.

Chen Yu: "......"

After waiting for a full ten minutes and not finding anything else unusual, Chen Yu finally couldn't help but be irritable, and yelled angrily: "TM is really a pipa!! ”

Later, he tried a third artifact, the belt.

The usefulness of this artifact was found to be the ability to shrink the tightness of the belt at will.

As long as the "master" has a mind, adjust it immediately!

It can even help the "owner" to quickly take off his pants......

"Don't say it, it's a bit useful." Thinking of his [Instantaneous Movement] ability, Chen Yu was a little pleased, but immediately roared: "There's a use for fart!" What is this? ”

Three artifacts.

All three are waste.

This made Chen Yu wonder if most of the "artifacts" were made up. It can only be used as a toy.

'Isn't that how artifacts are used?' ’

“……”

I graduated halfway through, and I didn't learn a lot of things in school. I have to go to the capital as soon as possible and find someone who understands. ’

At this point, Chen Yu did not hesitate, immediately extinguished the bonfire, packed up everything, picked up his backpack and ran in the direction of human civilization.

As soon as he took a few steps, he seemed to remember something, and hurriedly walked to the stream again to wash the stuck to his hands.

And in this way, he also saw the title of "Holy Pregnant Woman" on his head again through the water.

As a man who has experienced countless strange titles such as [Serial Corpse Crushing Murderer], "Pure and Flawless Virgin", and "Self-Palace for Mankind".

Now he is no longer moved by the outrageous "title".

Don't say "holy pregnant women".

Even if he becomes an "old bustard tortured by flowers and willows" next time, he will smile slightly and never smoke.

Looking at the title above his head, all he could think of was a thought that had just popped up.

"That's right!"

"Why can't I be a pregnant woman......

……

"Let go, let go, don't touch this beauty."

Three days later, in the territory of mankind, Qingcheng.

On a bus to No. 3 Middle School, a bus driver with sunglasses waved and yelled: "Don't crowd! Give her a seat! Don't you see that it's pregnant? ”

"It's okay, it's okay." Holding on to the boom and holding up her big belly, the long-haired beauty in the crowd waved her hand again and again: "I'm not pregnant, it's all in my stomach." ”

The whole car is full of people: "......"

"Sister, sit with me." On the side, a junior high school student hurriedly got up and gave up his place.

"Thank you." The long-haired beauty was not polite, and sat on the seat that was vacated.

There was a muffled "thump" sound.

made his big belly tremble three times.

The junior high school student who gave up the seat was stunned, and the thought of "this sister's buttocks is really strong" flashed in his mind.

"You girl, be careful." In the seat on the inside, a middle-aged woman frowned and looked at the abdomen of the long-haired beauty: "What should I do if I sit with so much strength and have a miscarriage?" ”

"Ah...... Right. The long-haired beauty suddenly nodded again and again: "I'll be careful next time." ”

"It's going to take seven or eight months, right?" The middle-aged woman stretched out her hand and stroked the belly of the long-haired beauty: "Why are you still squeezing the bus?" Your in-laws are too careless. ”

"I don't have in-laws." Dragging her bulging abdomen, the beauty pursed her lips.

"Ah, I'm sorry." The middle-aged woman was stunned for a moment, and hurriedly changed her words: "What about your husband, you are this month, he should take care of you." ”

"I don't have a husband either." The beauty bowed her head in frustration.

When these words fell, everyone on the entire bus pricked up their ears and eavesdropped with their eyes shining.

Even the driver in the driver's seat turned his right eye away while looking ahead with his left eyeball......

"You don't have a husband?" The woman opened her mouth wide: "That... What about the child's father. ”

"The child has no father." The long-haired beauty took off her hat and revealed the title of "Holy Pregnant Woman": "I am a virgin conceived and pregnant Nezha." ”

Everyone: "......"

Middle-aged woman: "Are you sick?" ”

Ten minutes later.

Under the frightened gaze of the whole car, Chen Yu jumped out of the window of the crowded bus, his legs "pounded" quickly, rushed out of the bus stop, stopped next to a bubble tea shop, and held up his big belly.

A few young people who were queuing up turned their heads and saw Chen Yu, who was "immobile", and immediately gave up their positions.

"Sister, you come first."

"You order first......"

Chen Yu changed his posture, supported his waist with both hands, cut in line in the first place step by step, and looked back to thank: "Thank you." ”

"You're welcome."

"Be polite to pregnant women, as you should."

"It's okay, it's okay......"

Sighing that the "civilian society" was still as friendly as ever, Chen Yu ordered a cold drink to caress his bulging abdomen.

He or she is a genius.

Because he dug up the ancestral grave of the human race and killed the foreign raccoon cat, he can now be said to be the enemy of the world.

But as long as you use the ability to "makeover", won't you be able to "become a new person"?

Especially now that the title of "Holy Pregnant Woman" makes his (her) identity impeccable!

"It was perfect."

Sighing, Chen Yu took the cold drink handed by the store and took a big sip.

Chilling! Hearts fly!

Beautiful stomping feet.

Chen Yu: "Yay! There are pearls! ”

Shopkeeper: "...... Girl, in this winter, can you drink cold drinks in your situation? ”

"It's okay." Chen Yu threw away the empty cup: "I said it all, my stomach is full of." ”

Everyone: "......"

After leaving the bubble tea shop, I went to a fast food restaurant and bought a lot of burgers. Chen Yu sat on a chair not far away, resting quietly while eating seafood.

And he didn't shy away from lifting his shirt, revealing his big belly, like a greasy middle-aged man, patting it around with his "oily and slippery" hands.

Make a rhythmic sound of "pop pop pop".

Silently felt the complicated gazes of the passers-by around him (her) with a big belly, and he didn't know what shame was at all.

Now, his (its) new identity is a pregnant teenage girl.

No matter how embarrassing it is, what does it have to do with him Chen Yu?

"Hiccup."

After a long night, after burping and licking the oil stains on his fingers, Chen Yu stood up and walked into the "Red Clay Pit Police Station" not far away.

In the hall of the office, four or five pregnant women had gathered at this time.

All of them, accompanied by police officers, fill out a form.

"Hello, you're here to record, aren't you?"

Seeing Chen Yu enter the door with a big belly, a policewoman immediately stepped forward and held his arm: "Take the seat, I'll get you the information." ”

"Uh-huh."

Chen Yu nodded with a big grin and looked around the hall environment.

It's only been a month since I saw him, and Chen Yu actually has a sense of nostalgia......

"Hello, the information is here."

Soon, the policewoman came over, holding a form that was exactly the same as the one in the hand of the other pregnant women, and asked with a smile, "Were you also invited by our colleagues on patrol?" ”

"Hmm." Chen Yu nodded: "I went out on the street today, and several police officers told me that pregnant women can give 100,000 yuan when they come here to register." ”

A new identity.

The old phone doesn't work.

He's really short of cash.

happened to meet the police station to "send money", so could he miss this good opportunity.

"Yes." The policewoman smiled and nodded: "In order to promote childbirth and reduce the pressure on the people, the new policy was just issued yesterday, and all registered pregnant women, or mothers who have given birth in the past six months, can receive 100,000 yuan from the state." Instantly. ”

"That's great!" Chen Yu licked his lips: "Then let's start registering, where are you kicking?" ”

"I'll do it." The policewoman showed the form in her hand: "I'll help you fill in some important information first, and you can fill in the rest slowly according to the instructions." If there is anything that won't, feel free to ask me. ”

Chen Yu: "It's hard work. ”

Policewoman: "No. Let's start with the first one, what's your name. ”

Chen Yu: "Chen Yuer." ”

……

(End of chapter)