In the wind, the leaves swirl.

The heat that had been smothering in the room had long since subsided, but it left a little cold.

Lin Yunyan looked at Xu Yi and comforted her softly: "It's all a dream."

She didn't want Mrs. Xu to go crazy again, and that was definitely not what Xu Jian wanted to see.

To this end, the two of them have made a lot of preparations in advance and have achieved many results.

Without Liu Jing and Liu Xun, it stands to reason that nothing can stimulate Mrs. Xu so much.

However, deep in her heart, Lin Yunyan inevitably felt heavy and depressed.

Mrs. Xu's dream is very real, and there is even a dream that she is familiar with.

Xu Jian sat in a wheelchair.

She pushed that wheelchair for so many years.

When the two of them escaped from the capital, Mrs. Xu's condition was not very good, and when Liu Huan's grandmother quietly stuffed them with money, she also mentioned "exhaustion", "crazy as if crazy", "aunt and grandmother's mother-in-law's family ran back and forth, I'm afraid I won't be able to hold on".

Since then, only sporadic messages have been received.

It's very rough, just a sentence of "crazy".

Lin Yunyan doesn't know if there is a scissors stabbing Liu Jing like Mrs. Xu in her dream behind this "crazy", if there really is, then ......

Is that still a simple dream?

If this paragraph is not a dream, then what are the other pictures that Mrs. Xu dreamed of?

Lin Yunyan couldn't take it for granted, she couldn't ask the result when she chased Mrs. Xu.

Not only could she not ask, but she also had to comfort Mrs. Xu over and over again, telling her not to get into the horns.

Xu Yi raised his hand and gently wiped the corners of his eyes.

Turning her head, she looked at the closed door behind her, thinking about the pain of Xu Jian's injury.

Xu is emotions are here, Xu is the county lord's kindness and gentleness make her willing to open the conversation, she said a lot of things that she has never said to anyone.

There is no for Ah Jian and Ah Huan, nor for Mama, nor for Xun'er, and even less for Liu Jing.

"I'm very conflicted sometimes," Xu Yi said slowly, as if only by speaking slowly like this could she suppress the turbulent ups and downs in her heart, "I'm actually confused in my life."

"I want to go back to when I was a child, to when my mother was still alive, to spend more time with her and let her spend more time with me, I want her to teach me a lot of things, instead of growing up alone."

"I also thought about going back to before I got married, my lord didn't save me, and I didn't marry him, I just married someone that my father was satisfied with and liked, and my father really loved me."

"But more often than not, I don't want to change anything."

"Before the master left Beijing, I told him that I don't regret it, I don't regret it in the past 20 years, I didn't lie to him, and I didn't lie to myself."

"If I hadn't married him, how could I have Ajan, Xun'er, and Ajuan?"

"If I had a different life, I would have gained something else, but I would have lost three people, I don't want to."

"My father may be satisfied that I am married to a son-in-law he likes, and he may like my other children, but I know that what he wants most is Ah Jian, who is the pride of his life, and no one can replace him."

Lin Yunyan did not interrupt Mrs. Xu's words, but only responded softly, indicating that she was listening very carefully.

It's okay to say it, she thought.

These heavy thoughts have been said, and Mrs. Xu's heart can be more happy.

"And," Mrs. Xu paused, curled her lips and smiled, her eyes already shining, "Where is it so easy to go back to the past?"

Lin Yunyan blinked.

She has experience in this topic, but she is not easy to talk about.

"No one can guarantee that if you go back to the past, you will be able to escape all the suffering, and neither can the Bodhisattva."

"The road of life is too difficult to walk, it is all forks in the road, I have bypassed a corner, so what about the next one? Wouldn't it be wrong?"

"I walked to a completely unfamiliar place, looking at a fork in the road I had never been to, I could

Did you choose the right one? Maybe I'll choose another pain I've never tasted."

"How many chances can I re-elect?"

"Even if I really have, again and again, do I really have that much courage to try one way at a time and suffer little by little?"

Reciprocating reincarnation, never ending.

Xu Yi didn't have that kind of opportunity and embodiment, but she knew that she might not be able to stand it.

The trough struggled, the past is the past, and she can look back now because she has come through.

If she did it again, she might really be like in her dreams, crazy, right?

Lin Yunyan was stunned.

She was experiencing Mrs. Xu's emotion, but she didn't think about Mrs. Xu's perspective.

She has always been lucky, and at present, her choice is right, step by step over the previous hurdles, step by step closer to the desired goal.

Is it because it has not yet reached the end and has not reflected the previous right and wrong?

Or is it because she's not alone?

She also has Xu Jian, and the two of them are walking this path again.

But even so, he was still too lucky.

Fortunately, for more than a year, she has not experienced a "mistake", at least the mistakes that are superficial and obvious at a glance have never happened.

Is it a fluke?

Lin Yunyan couldn't say it well.

Her heart was full of emotions intertwined.

She took a deep breath, hard to describe in words, but she knew that the deepest part of her emotions was not a fluke.

After Xu Yi said this, he saw that Lin Yunyan beside him stopped talking.

She turned her eyes to look at her, and saw that the county lord pursed his lips and his eyebrows were tightened.

"Scaring you?" Xu Yi hurriedly asked her, "Blame me, saying that those who have and don't have are all cranky, but let you listen to them in your heart."

When Lin Yunyan heard this, she burst out laughing.

Usually, she comforted Mrs. Xu, but now it was the other way around, and Mrs. Xu came to comfort her.

"I'm not scared," Lin Yunyan's expression relaxed, "Even if I hear it roughly, I can't help but wonder if I can bear it if I fail and suffer over and over again."

Don't think it's just something you don't have, I actually love to hear about it.

People of all ages have different ideas, I often listen to the Queen Mother, my grandmother, and often listen to my sisters, and my aunts and uncles love me very much, but they can't and won't come to me to tell me this kind of heartfelt words.

My mother left early, and I don't know what the mother thinks of her children. If you want to tell me, it's too late for me to be happy."

Xu Yi clenched Lin Yunyan's hand and choked up for a while.

She can fully understand the feelings of "losing her mother", and she feels even more sorry for Lin Yunyan.

She still had memories of her mother when she was a child, but the county lord was too young to remember anything.

After all, the memories of others are others, less than one ten-millionth of what is in the arms of one's mother.

Perhaps, it is precisely because of this sincere emotion that she is reluctant to give up her children.

She delivered her affection to them, and it was also the "reflection" she wanted from her deceased mother.

Those ups and downs, she is as sweet as she is.

Perhaps, the county lord will also learn this from her own children in the future.

It's just that Mrs. Xu can't say anything now.

How can there be an elder who starts to give birth to a daughter-in-law before she enters the door?

She didn't have the idea of passing on the family lineage, and she wasn't such a boring and annoying person.

As he spoke, the door behind him creaked open.

Lin Yunyan turned her head when she heard the sound, and saw Xu Jian coming out of the house.

Xu Jian had already cleaned up his appearance, and he couldn't see the injury in his right leg under his robe, but he walked slower than usual when he went down the steps, and Shenchen even stepped forward to help him.

Looking at each other, Xu Jian's eyes fell on Lin Yunyan and Xu Yi, and he could see at a glance that the mood of the two was a little low.

This is also inevitable, and it is strange to be happy.

However, after two more glances, Xu Jian saw something meaningful in Lin Yunyan's eyes, not like holding back the fire, but thinking about it.

A little off.

When Lin Yunyan came out of the house before, she was not in such a state, it should have been something the two of them said......

I also talked about it in my heart.

Xu Jian couldn't pinch it for a while, but he felt that his mood was also much lower.

Lin Yunyan came over and asked him, "Just walk back to the front?" Why don't you sit in a sedan chair?"

Xu Jian pursed her lower lip.

In the past, I did walk back, and Dr. Yue didn't say that I wouldn't let me go, and I had a lot of relief just now, but now it's different from the past.

Such a thing is not worth turning into oil and pouring it on the fire for some reason.

"There is a sedan chair." Xu Jian said, glancing at Shenchen.

Samchen was clever and busy arranging.

Xu Yi looked at Lin Yunyan and then at Xu Jian, and couldn't help laughing.

She mentioned before that Ah Jian was troublesome, and she didn't want to persuade her too much, so she just gave up.

Sure enough, it was still one thing and one thing, and the county lord spoke, which persuaded him.

The sedan chair arrived soon, Xu Yi only explained a few words, and then left first, Lin Yunyan and Xu Jian went back to the front.

Xu Baiben prepared tea and snacks in the flower hall, and when he heard that Grandpa Guo took the county lord to the study, he was very surprised, and hurriedly carried the snack box to the outside of the study.

The study is a "forbidden place" in the house, and even Xu Bai has never entered it.

He handed the box to Sanchen and asked in a low voice, "Is it really inside?"

Sanchen is no stranger to this.

In the study of Peach Kernel Zhai, the county lord also wants to enter.

"After all, it's the county lord." He said to Xu Bai.

Xu Bai thought about it and nodded.

That's right, too.

After all, it is the county lord, and soon it will be the duchess of the country, a husband and wife, what do you and I do?

Samchen sent snacks in, prepared tea, and withdrew.

Lin Yunyan held the teacup and looked left and right.

It's the same as I remember, but it's not exactly the same, the house is like that, the longer you live, the more things you have.

A couch was placed on the side for resting, and Xu Jian was lying down, not paying attention to Lin Yunyan.

I can't pay attention to it.

The more particular he is, the more the little county lord nags.

This is also the reason why they didn't go to the flower hall, one step in place, saving Xu Jian from waiting for Xu Jian to move the place, anyway, the little county lord didn't treat himself as a guest.

In order to stabilize the temper of the little county lord, Xu Jian even took the initiative to take a thin blanket to cover his legs.

Seeing the blanket, Lin Yunyan's brows were not so tight.

Seeing this, Xu Jian said, "I didn't know that you came today, the dim sum prepared in the kitchen is not so sweet, and it is not as good as the peach pit in Peach Nut."

Lin Yunyan replied and said, "I pondered, if there is a chance, I can invite the He family's grandmother to come to the mansion, and Madame should want to try her craftsmanship."

Xu Jian raised his eyebrows slightly.

If the little county lord wants to mention the conversation between her and Mrs. Xu, this is really a good entry point.

Sure enough, the next sentence was picked up.

"Madame talked to me a lot just now," Lin Yunyan glanced at Xu Jian and said, "She still holds back a lot of thoughts in her heart, even if there is no Liu Jing and Liu Xun, it is not good for her to hold things back, and someone needs to listen to her."

Some of them can't be said to you and Ajuan, or the grandmothers, she will say some to me, and if she doesn't want to tell me, she will be willing to tell Mama He.

When she was a child, after all, she was very close to Mama He, and tasting the taste of childhood can also make her happier a lot."

Xu simply felt that the "cause" in the middle was not a good thing, so he simply answered the "effect" directly.

"I'll arrange for Mama to come here." Xu Jiandao.

Lin Yunyan asked again, "Don't you want to know what Madame said to me?

I learned a lot from what she said."

Xu Jian: ......

He guessed that there were a lot of problems today, but he didn't expect that he would take them all over to avoid the weight in the Anping Courtyard, and the account book would be opened again and again.

"What did she say?" Xu Jian could only ask in passing.

Lin Yunyan smiled lightly, temporarily relieving the depressed emotions in her heart, and then she slowly told Mrs. Xu about her thoughts.

"I didn't think about that, but now that I think about it, I am indeed extremely lucky," Lin Yunyan sighed, "There are many flashes of inspiration, there are many natural ones, and even a lot of luck.

With a little less luck, many things would not be the way they are now.

And if I were alone, I wouldn't be able to do what I am now."

What she knows and works hard can only be around the Sincerity Mansion, which can affect the Queen Mother, but the imperial study and the thousand-step corridor are not places where she can casually leave and right.

The one who can play chess pieces in the court is Xu Jian.

Xu Jian was silent for a while, obviously surprised by Xu Yi's thinking.

After a long time, he said, "It's really difficult to be alone, without your help, I can't move the Queen Mother, and I don't know about Zhu Fei."

Many things, no matter how fierce they are, there is still a gap in the end.

Once the gap appears, the subsequent development is "a matter of course", just like they found Li Mi's son from Zhu Fei, and also found the real cause of King Ding's death.

Lin Yunyan got up, walked to the couch and squatted down, looked up at Xu Jian, and said, "Many things are different from before, such as what Madame said, I walked to a completely unfamiliar place, and no one dares to guarantee whether the fork in the road will be right after that."

"You can only go down," Xu Jian's hand fell on Lin Yunyan's head, very lightly, "After walking through, you will know that it is right and wrong, the more you master, the better your luck will be."

Lin Yunyan laughed again.

She also stretched out her hands, took Xu Jian's hand off her head, and pressed it against her forehead: "Do we have enough of it?"

Xu Jian frowned.

didn't wait for him to answer, only to hear Lin Yunyan say again: "Go down and know, you rest, I have to enter the palace to see the queen mother."

After speaking, Lin Yunyan let go of Xu Jian's hand, stood up, straightened the hem of her clothes, and turned around to walk out.

Xu Jian saw that she was about to go around the floor cover, and he called out to her: "Ah Yan."

Lin Yunyan stopped and turned her head to look.

Xu Jian looked at her with a heavy gaze: "If you can get through, don't worry."