Chapter 44: Always Meaningless
Can you tell me...... All of it? ”
Chang Yu Feng turned around and asked Lan Luo next to him.
Lan Luo was extremely melancholy today, even holding her chin with her hands, and her ice blue eyes seemed to be tangled in whether to raise to look at him.
"What...... Is it? It's like a little whisper and I don't bother to answer.
She lay one leg flat and the other arched, except that she had not yet slept, this sleeping position was lazy enough, and the white dress fell to the ground, and the grass was fragrant, and the beautiful woman was fragrant, and the lamb was also fragrant.
"I mean...... Can you tell me about it...... My story ......," Chang Yu Kaede pointed to himself.
"You...... The story ......" Lan Luo spoke word by word, but his lazy lips were unwilling to open.
Chang Yu Feng also felt sad, and Lan Luo's mood was erratic...... Right now...... He wanted to ask, but he couldn't.
"That's right! I'm curious to know why Shadow Seeker is looking for me...... I don't even know who I really am...... I'm ...... now I wondered, who the hell am I...... What am I going to do...... What should I do......"
Chang Yufeng turned his head and looked at Lan Luo's lazy appearance, the beauty lowered her eyes, and she didn't bother to look at him, just looked at the green finch in her hand, the green finch couldn't speak, and it was on the back of her hand, but it also looked at itself obediently and skillfully.
"Huh~" She wanted to sleep, so she yawned, and with a wave of her hand, the green finch flew up with the upward jade hand, flew to the branch of the apple tree and stopped, and slowly closed her eyes.
"I don't know...... Your Everything...... All I know is that there are three kings in this world, and in my opinion, each king has its own characteristics...... Even have their own fates. ”
"Which three kings?"
Chang Yufeng said very lightly, in fact, no matter how you say it, you should be excited, because she is also the reincarnation of a "king", but now she is not excited at all, she is not happy at all, the distress is enough torture, and there is nothing worth mentioning at all.
"The Supreme King...... King of the High Realm...... And also...... The King of Heavenly Benevolence...... "Lan Luo told eloquently, that's all, what a king, what a king is only more than three thousand years ago, and it has already turned into smoke.
"Which one am I? Wang ...... "Chang Yufeng looked at the ashes fire in his hand, those fires ...... But it was sticky and scary, not like a flame at all.
"The King of Benevolence...... I ......"
"Me?"
"No ......"
"Is it amazing?"
"Weak ......"
"That's right...... So where should I go now? I want to go back...... I'm worried that they ...... "Changyu Kaede scratches the ash fire, heh, these sticky flames, even a little tempered, if you don't want to be used by yourself, it's so thick and scary."
"The King of Benevolence...... How...... Ancient Past ......" Lan Luo was melancholy like an old elder, speaking extremely slowly, even with the same steadiness and tranquility above his breath.
"Any king is good...... I don't care about that...... It's all false and useless...... Moreover...... The most important point is that I'm not ...... You also said that it was a very old man...... Those who should have stayed in history a long time ago should not come out to be demons again...... Do you know? I actually hate this kind of thing...... I don't want to be anyone...... I don't want to live in anyone's shadow. Chang Yu Feng was a little frustrated, because it was difficult to survive like this...... No matter what, it shouldn't be like this......
No goal, no head.
"He lost his name...... It doesn't matter...... Now, you are him...... You need to face your fate...... Let all grievances be over...... With us, with the gods, with other kings. ”
Lan Luo didn't seem to care about his thoughts, but this was enough to make him even more entangled.
"But you still haven't told me everything about the King of Benevolence...... There is a saying that there is no injustice and no hatred, what does it matter...... But you always let me fight and kill, what do your grievances have to do with me, a person who is 3,000 years later? Chang Yu Feng kept looking into her eyes, but she lowered her head, but she could never lift it, her white eyelashes matched her long white hair, but she always did this, and she didn't look at him.
"So...... These are just inexplicable...... Where is the right and wrong...... Perhaps there should be no right or wrong in the world, and there should be no grievances. Some are just in a hurry between life and death......" She finally closed her eyes, melancholy, and lay down gently, staying in front of Chang Yufeng, and resting on her back: "Maybe it's better to be all dead...... It's the quietest ...... of all."
She didn't seem to be able to speak normally, and every word she said was unclear...... Or even lost all enthusiasm...... All he thinks about is sleeping.
"I want to leave...... I still have everything that Bai Lingshan has learned, even if I don't have the support of huge spiritual power, as long as I don't have the restrictions of the Ning family's bloodline...... I can have enough strength to support me, and under normal circumstances, I can still protect myself......" Changyu Kaede nodded affirmatively, as if he had already determined his thoughts.
Lan Luo didn't answer.
Lan Luo's mood can be described as cloudy, he can't be sure that he has mastered the character of Seeking the Desolate Shadow, but in terms of her mood, the quietest and most reassuring is Lan Luo's current mood - melancholy.
More often than not, Lan Luo is still able to talk, but it is always so-called emotional, which also makes her herself very distressed, and Chang Yu Feng is also very distressed, and talking or talking to such a person will inevitably require more patience.
This is not a disease, but because Lan Luo has no heart and cannot control his emotions at all......
Chang Yu Feng couldn't understand, he didn't know how a person without a heart should live, but if Lan Luo couldn't control his emotions like this, he might be able to have a little pity.
"I really want to leave...... Do you know? I have a weird feeling for everyone! I don't want anything right now! I don't know if I should live, I'm not without desires...... I was just...... It's not clear why I'm still alive...... If I keep alive, will I still be me...... If my personality or perspective has changed and contradicts what I have said before, am I still me? I used to be me! So who am I now? Who will I be in the future? Worldwide! It's like I'm the only one who doesn't know if I'm ...... I'm not inferior...... Nor is it pride...... I really think so...... Confused......" Chang Yu Feng was depressed, and talked to himself here, Lan Luo didn't pay attention to him, and Qingque was also resting.
There are flowers and grasses here, and the fragrance enters the nose, which makes people extremely intoxicated......
But it's just dull, and Chang Yu Feng can't breathe, no matter what, he wants to leave now.
Everything is in someone else's calculations...... This distress ...... Why impose it on a man who knows nothing about past grievances?
It doesn't matter if it's reincarnation, it's abandonment, it's reincarnation......
Why impose it on yourself again?
If you don't have these......
Who would think about their past life?
Haven't lived well in this life, have you?
Why care about anything else?
If I could go and herd the sheep, I would now feel like a good errand, to be with the white creatures who can't speak, to let them graze, to help them shear their sheep, to keep them company......
Don't care about anything, don't want to think about anything, you can not know anything, the heaven and the earth are high and wide, the sun and the moon are long, and they have nothing to do with themselves.
So what does it matter? Everything becomes unimportant...... It's as if you've never lived......
But why can't you accept such a death?
With those well-tended lambs...... It's also a meaningless job...... The same senseless death......
Come to this world...... How do you go about it?
Do you want to be rich?
What about the innumerable amount of money?
Do you want to have the right?
What is the use of inexhaustible power?
These are all desires......
Since life and death are downbeat, what is important about these fleeting things?
Now, what's the point of being alive?
Changyu Feng felt tired, as a little lamb, he was nothing after all...... Isn't it? It's good to live a peaceful life...... Kill or not...... Those struggles with the gods, with the demon king, with the shadow of the wilderness, and with themselves seem to be nothing...... But he appeared all the time, so he didn't understand......
Who's alive......
Is it a long-feathered maple?
Is it Ning Yufeng?
Is it the king who has lost his name?
Or is it a shell filled with memories......
What is this?
Now he doesn't understand more and more, everything ...... and everything that has to do with fate......
He was always reminded of the term......
He was always listening, not knowing how to answer...... If there is a destiny in this world......
So why does fate only have twists and turns, with mortal desires, so that the final ending is turned into dead dust?
Why do people only call suffering fate......
Life and death are fate, and it is not from good to bad, and from bad to good survival games are called fate.
Fate should not be an inspiring rhetoric, nor should it be a reason to sink into decadence.
It is a person who should be in the middle of a blur, and people are destined to be born, including the [endgame of man] that is born by layers of [living].
This is the destiny of man.
Rather than worldly desires—the loss of money and power—such things that make people born nothing, should be spiritual tractions—a part of life that must be experienced and lived for. 】
[The desire attached to the physiology comes from the understanding of life, and then the death that cannot be escaped is the manifestation of fate.
Everything that happens on the "same road" of life and death can be called fate, which is the common sense of fate.
From the moment the baby fell to the ground, it was already destined to find a destination for the liberation of his life in the personality that has changed with time and experience.
To put it more generally, how people should live should depend on themselves, not on others, people's lives are short and extremely long, and not many people stop to think about the meaning of life......
Because most people, alive ...... It's not easy......
I want to live better than others, I can't live my life because I am constrained by the evaluation of others, I want my own peace of mind, but I can't always find myself, I want to balance myself and others, but I am always limited at both ends, and my life is empty......
Both material and spiritual need to be rich in order to be more unburdened by the world, this kind of wealth is not overflowing money and emotion, but the "moderation" in the golden mean.
Chang Yu Feng's mind was blank, and he was also thinking about what to do now......
Why did things turn out like this......
He can leave everything alone...... He didn't want to know the answer...... Because the answer doesn't matter anymore......
He didn't want to die, he always had a sympathetic attitude towards the meaninglessness of death, but his meaningless attitude towards life had always been contemptuous, he shouldn't be idle, but he always didn't know what to do, as if he had accumulated too many things, enough to make him confused...... He wants to hide it for a while, so that he can calm down on both sides when he reappears, and he can stand and say to others, hello, my name is Changyu Kaede, it doesn't matter who I am, I'm just a guy called Changyu Feng, if you ask me why I'm so happy, then I should only be able to answer you, I'm very happy, because I'm Changyu Feng. It's that simple......
Nothing more......
Perhaps such a day will never come......
There is no way out now......
The lamb's mood was always so sad that he always felt the urge to die on the grass......
Whether it's in a welfare home for yourself...... Or in the world where there is no welfare home, or in the self who was born in Wenti County...... Or maybe it's tens of thousands......
Who......
Will it be the truest self? Which one is close to the most authentic self...... Do you know? Does Long Feather Kaede know?
The little lamb was in tears, and he was in a bad mood now...... It's not what he wants to cry about, he doesn't know why he's crying, probably because no one gave him an answer......
Or, his current Qingyun is terrible...... Even the low frightening, the twitching of his heart made him cry in pain.
A hand was placed on his head, and that hand was as white as jade, and his wrist was as white as snow.
"Don't be upset...... My dear Wang...... It's just the beginning, and if you're depressed, we're going to lose our game with everyone......" Lan Luo was still asleep and didn't open his eyes...... She spoke slowly, like an old wise man, though she was so beautiful.
"I don't know...... I'm just sad...... It may be that this sheep's original emotions have infected me......" Changyu Kaede replied.
"The World...... It's not pretty, so you need to be more aware of why this is the case...... I can't answer for you what happened in the distant past...... But I can still tell you...... Everything you're up against...... Shadow Seeker will understand...... Everything you do ......"
"You said something I didn't understand...... It's like making something out of nothing...... I was even more upset...... That's what I'm worried about...... I don't even know who I am......" Changyu Kaede sighed, and it wiped away the tears.
"You don't need to be clear, you just need to accept ...... It's like all living ants in the world...... Meaningless ...... Meaningless death, though you are different...... But it's a must...... You need to understand...... You, just you......"
"I ......"
Chang Yu Feng wanted to speak, but the temperature of that hand was very low, which made him excited.
When he looked over, Lan Luo was already asleep......
Sleep peacefully.
He didn't know what to do, and he dragged his round body away from Lan Luo's origin, curled up like a fur ball.
Sleep?
Sleep, perhaps......
When will the days with Lan Luo end?