An affectionate and selfless kiss, the surging passion in our hearts can not be calmed for a long time.

When instinct drove me to move further, reason stopped me, and I knew it wasn't the right time.

Love is not an endless take-and-possession, but devotion and respect. If I want to continue, Yaoyao may not refuse out of love, but she will definitely leave regrets.

And I myself will regret this rash behavior for the rest of my life, and I look forward to the natural union that will come naturally, and I know that she needs respect and protection.

We slowly separated, and the rapid breathing and affectionate looking at each other made the atmosphere of this moment very ambiguous.

"Thank you, Xiao Yuan. Thank you! ”

Yaoyao hugged me tightly again, lying on my shoulder, her long breathing and heaving chest all told us how passionate and crazy the kiss just now was.

"Fool, why thank me, this is what I should do."

"I knew you were different from everyone else, and I felt it from the first time I saw you."

Yaoyao's tone suddenly became serious, which made me a little nervous, and I didn't know why she suddenly mentioned this.

"Your appearance has made me truly feel what love is. I was so scared just now, I don't know what I should do if you want to continue. ”

I knew that she would definitely think of it, but I didn't expect her to bring it up so seriously.

In fact, it is not difficult to understand that we are eighteen or nineteen years old, the age of blood and steel. About love, about X, we've all been curious and yearning.

Especially me, although I have never been in love, but I opened my mind quite early. Therefore, I have more expectations and desires for men and women than others.

Especially after falling in love with Yaoyao, there are often reveries about this aspect. The reason why I didn't continue was not because I was noble, but because I didn't want to leave her with regrets.

I put my arm around her and pushed her tighter, then took a deep breath. Her body fragrance entered her brain again, and bursts of comfort instantly spread throughout her body.

"Don't worry, fool, I'll love you so much. I will never let you suffer the slightest grievance from me, and I will not force you to do things you don't like. ”

I know that she has her concerns, and naturally I also know that I should have my own bottom line to stick to. Of course, I'm not a saint, and I'm not the Liu Daguan who doesn't sit still.

At this time, my body was swollen as if it was full of gas under the stimulation of hormones, and the skin all over my body was uncomfortable as if it was being eaten by thousands of ants.

At this moment, I had a thought in my heart, run away, I didn't want to stay for a second. I'm afraid that if I stay any longer, I'll do something that is not as good as a beast.

So without waiting for Yaoyao to continue to sigh, I quickly got up to say goodbye, and then left her house as if I was running away.

When I got home, I immediately rushed into the bathroom, turned on the faucet and stood underneath without taking off my clothes, letting the cold water pour on my head.

The cold water slid over every inch of my skin, slowly cooling my restless heart. The uncomfortable swelling in my body also subsided little by little, and looking at my wet self, I felt a laugh in my heart, what is this called.

I took a hasty shower and changed into clean clothes, which made me feel a lot more comfortable. I wanted to look at Yaoyao in front of the window and say good night to her, but when I thought of the beautiful scenery just now, I could only give up.

took out her phone and wanted to send her a message, only to find out that there were her unread messages. Clicking on her flashing avatar, a large piece of text appeared on the screen, and it couldn't fit on a screen.

'Xiao Yuan, thank you for your love and respect, and thank you for the feeling of security you have brought me. I am a person who is extremely insecure, but you have made me believe in love and feel your protection. I'm sad to see you so uncomfortable today, but I don't want that to happen in such unprepared circumstances. In my heart, it is sacred, the sustenance and cornerstone of the future. So I don't want to happen hastily without preparation, and thank you for stopping in time today. Trust me, I'll give myself to you when I'm ready. ’

This kid has to send a message to explain this. I was really speechless, and I didn't know how to reply to her after thinking about it for a long time.

After struggling for a long time, he simply replied, 'This is what I should do as a boyfriend, don't think nonsense, rest early, good night.' ’

I don't want to dwell on this issue, and I don't want her to get hung up on this matter and affect our relationship.

It's supposed to be a really nice thing, and if I let it be a mustard between us, then I'll regret it.

So she can only end this conversation and let her give up discussing this matter, so as to downplay the impact of this matter on her.

After saying goodnight to each other, the conversation was successfully terminated, but this night I was guilty. I dreamed all night, and I got up in the middle of the night and took two cold showers to barely survive until dawn.

When I went out, I happened to meet Chen Kun and Li Xiuying who came out of the opposite room, and when they saw my big dark circles, they laughed at me decisively and ruthlessly.

After a listless day, when I got home from work, I was so sleepy that I immediately took a shower and went to sleep.

I don't know how long I slept, but I was suddenly awakened by a knock on the door. I sat up, but my body woke up, and consciousness had not yet returned to my body.

After sitting on the bed and waiting for a long time, the soul that had been swimming for nine days was considered to be back, and it happened that there was another knock on the door at this time.

I quickly got up and ran out to open the door, only to see Yaoyao waiting anxiously at the door. As soon as I opened the door, she threw herself into my arms and hugged me tightly.

I was scared of her actions, and I was worried that something was wrong. I hurriedly asked her, but she didn't say a word for a long time.

Her silence confirmed my suspicions, and I quickly took her hand from my neck, then looked at her already in tears, and cautiously asked her what had happened.

Looking at her expression now, my heart was torn apart as if someone had thrown her from a height of 10,000 meters.

"Yaoyao, stop crying, tell me what's wrong."

"Why don't you answer my phone and don't reply to my messages?"

"Ah, I didn't, I didn't sleep well last night. I slept as soon as I came back today, and probably didn't hear anyone's calls. ”

After saying that, I didn't wait for her to respond, picked her up, turned around and went back to the room, and found the phone. Only then did I see that there were more than 20 missed calls, and there were more than a dozen unread messages.

Looking at Yaoyao in my arms, who had already cried into tears, my heart was full of guilt. I've experienced such an unresponsive wait, and I naturally know what it feels like to be tormented.

I gently sat her on the edge of the bed, then crouched down in front of her and took a tissue to wipe the tears from her face.

I don't know what's going on, yesterday she wiped my tears at her house, and today the roles are reversed, and I wiped her at my house.

"Sorry, fool. I was so sleepy today, so I fell asleep as soon as I came back, and I didn't hear your calls and messages just now. ”

It's okay that I don't explain, but she cried out as soon as she explained, and her tears flowed out. hurriedly helped her wipe the tears from the corners of her eyes, and her heart was indescribably sour.

I can't imagine the worry and despair she experienced behind the two dozen phone calls and a dozen pieces of news. I can't imagine how much grievance and helplessness there was in her tears at this time.

"I.... I thought you were mad at me... Ignore me, I... I've called you a lot.... You don't answer a lot of phone calls. I messaged you again, and you still won't reply. I'm so scared, afraid that you'll leave me alone. ”

Yaoyao's intermittent narration is full of grievances. At this time, she was like a helpless child, holding me tightly, her voice choked and her expression painful.

My heart twitched as she recounted, as if it was being held tightly by a big hand, and then squeezed hard. Every time I tightened, my muscles stiffened, as if I had been shocked.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't answer your calls, I didn't reply to your messages, I was really sleepy, so I didn't hear your calls. ”

I couldn't think of anything else I could do to alleviate her pain but to apologize.

A good love makes me talk like this, and my lover is so miserable, but I, the culprit, can only watch.

"You promised me that you would not answer my phone calls or reply to my messages at any time in the future. I couldn't find you all of a sudden, I was so scared, afraid that something had happened to you, that you would be angry with me and ignore me, that I would lose you. ”

"I promise you, no matter what happens in the future, I will not fail to answer your phone calls and not reply to your messages. How could I ignore you, how could I be willing to leave you? ”

After listening to my words, Yaoyao seemed to settle down a lot, and the sobbing voice gradually stopped. I couldn't hear what was muttering in her mouth, and she was tired of crying and fell asleep on my shoulder.

I stood up cautiously, tiptoed her down on the bed, and pulled the quilt over her.

Seeing that she still had tears in the corners of her eyes and fell asleep with a satisfied smile, my hanging heart fell.

I took Yaoyao's hand and sat next to her, took the phone, it was already more than two o'clock in the morning, and the more than two dozen missed calls lasted from ten o'clock to half an hour ago.

No wonder Yaoyao was so upset, for four hours, she couldn't contact me. I can't imagine what kind of mental journey she went through in these four hours.

clicked on her avatar, which was already gray, but still beating, and the first message was sent after the first phone call.

'Xiao Yuan, why did you go, why didn't you answer the phone? Quickly call me back when I saw the message. ’

Twenty minutes later, 'I made two more calls, why didn't you answer, are you angry?' ’

'Bastard, answer the phone quickly, is there anything you can't make clear in person?' What do you mean when you don't answer the phone? ’

'Xiao Yuan, you answer the phone, I've made several calls, if you tell me something, okay?" ’

'Xiao Yuan, Xiao Yuan, Xiao Yuan, you send me a message back, or answer a phone, I have something to tell you. ’

'Xiao Yuan, please, you can say something. Didn't you promise me that you wouldn't be angry with me? Why don't you answer the phone? ’

'Husband, I was wrong, you answer the phone.' In the future, I will listen to you, you can do whatever you want me to do, don't ignore me. ’

'Husband, can I go and see you now?' I'm going to give myself to you today, as long as you like it. ’

......

I didn't have the courage to read any more information, and tears blurred my eyes. In these four short hours, what kind of despair did she experience that made her so humble.

Looking at Yaoyao, who was once as proud as a princess, desperate for love, giving up her dignity to please me.

Not only did I not have a trace of joy in my heart, but I seemed to be filled with lead, sinking all the way into the abyss.

I slapped myself twice, hating myself for not being able to see her hate message in time, hating myself for disappearing in her world for four hours.

I hate myself even more for making her sacrifice her dignity for the sake of our love, and giving up her perseverance in order to please me.

At this moment, my heart felt like it had been banished to an ancient desolate land, surrounded by desolation and dead silence. I wandered alone in this place, with no time, no direction, and no life.

I've heard that the heart is like a knife, but when it really happens to me, the pain is completely different from what I imagined.

The pain, the pain of a knife, spread from the heart to the whole body. From the internal organs to the limbs, every cell felt like it was exploding.

The heart-rending pain didn't make me cry, it turned out that the real pain was extreme without tears and without crying.

I gritted my teeth to ease the pain, but it didn't lessen in the slightest. Bursts of pain swept through the heart, from the top of the head to the soles of the feet, from the fingertips to every pore.

I curled up on the edge of the bed, my phone already clutched and twisted. It was then that the tears began to drip down and onto the floor, like my own broken soul.

The physical pain gradually subsided, but the mental pain could not be alleviated. Every word and word of Yaoyao on the screen is like a steel knife stuck in my heart.

I covered my mouth and nose tightly, afraid that I would cry out and disturb the sleeping Yaoyao. But my body began to tremble uncontrollably, and my throat unconsciously whimpered.

I had to get up and shut myself in the bathroom, and at the moment I wanted to cry loudly, I wanted to release the pain in my heart.

But I knew I couldn't, I didn't dare, I could only grit my teeth hard, clench my fists hard, control my body, and not let myself make a sound.

Uncontrolled facial features began to work separately, and tears, snot, and saliva rushed out of the body.

I didn't have time to care about them, so I squeezed myself into the corner of the bathroom so that I could feel a little bit of authenticity.