On Saturday afternoon, it was 4:50 p.m. after the make-up class. Pan Suyu hurriedly pushed the bicycle and galloped in the direction of home. Her home is not very far from the school. But because she is always reluctant to spend two yuan to take a ride, she has to ride a bicycle for nearly an hour every time she goes back. 

Although it is only the beginning of April, the spring has gradually receded, and the summer is getting stronger. The endless and unending mildewy spring rains in the south have gradually passed, and the weather has gradually become hotter. It seems to be brewing rain, and even though it is almost dusk, the sun is still hot on the face. There was no wind, just a hint of coolness from her own squeezing with the air. She was in no mood to admire the green trees and wildflowers on the roadside, nor was she in the mood to look at the flocks of butterflies flying around the roadside, and she wanted to go home. Although that home was neither beautiful nor warm, she wanted to go home. 

When I finally got home, it was better to say that it was a "nest", because a family of six only lived in a small bungalow of more than 40 square meters, plus a low and broken kitchen. Except for a few miscellaneous things, all the furniture in the main room was two wooden beds, a vertical wooden wardrobe, a faded table of eight immortals, and a few long benches. The house was dark and messy, the floor was black and muddy, and because of the destruction of the years, the ground was uneven, and there were many empty wine bottles piled up on the uneven ground. The walls have fallen off a lot because of their age, revealing large patches of mud bricks. At this time, it was early summer, it was the time when mosquitoes were most vigorous, when Suyu returned home, and when it was about to get dark, as soon as she walked into the house, she was greeted by a few mosquitoes, and the sound of "buzzing, buzzing" was endless. This is her home. 

Su Yu walked into the house, no one welcomed her except mosquitoes, the house was quiet, and she was a little strange. At this moment, her sister Suman's voice came from outside the house, she turned around and walked out, only to see her sister and younger brother pulling her sister covered in mud and walking towards home. As soon as her younger brother Su Tang saw her, he put down the hand that was holding Su Jin's hand full of mud and ran towards her: "Sister, you're back!" 

"Xiaotang, what are you doing, why did the eldest sister do this?" 

"When I came back from school, I hadn't seen my eldest sister for a long time, so I asked Xiaotang to look for her, but Xiaotang couldn't find her. So we went to look for her, and just now we found her in the muddy ditch in the back, and she was catching fish with the children, and they bullied her, and they beat her with mud. Su Man said indignantly to Su Yu. 

Su Yu looked at her sister who was full of mud but was smiling stupidly, and her heart was sour, and she was helpless and pitiful to her. "Sister, don't run out in the future, lest you let others bully you again." These words were useless, Su Jin bit his thumb, laughed on the side, and muttered, "Hee, hee, it's fun, there are fish." ”

"Ahh Su Tang leaned close to her and babbled to her about some things and miscellaneous things at home. "Sister, I scored another 100 points in the math test this time, and the teacher praised me!" Sister, yesterday Aunt Liu's Jianhui and I had a fight. ”

"Why fight with people? Didn't I tell you you weren't allowed to fight? Why are you disobedient?" 

"He said that the eldest sister was a madman, and the father was a scoundrel, and our whole family was a crazy person with abnormal nerves. I couldn't get angry, so I punched him. Su Tang pouted aggrievedly. 

"Besides, you punched someone, and they don't know how many punches they punched you! Last night, that Aunt Liu also aggressively dragged her family Jianhui to my house, and made a lot of noise for a long time before leaving. My chapel was still bleeding from my nose! Really. Su Man added indignantly. 

Su Yu was angry, pitiful and painful when she heard this, and her tears almost didn't fall. "Xiaotang, you don't care about them in the future, don't care what others say, you just don't hear it, the key is that we have to fight for ourselves, you know? I'm not allowed to fight with anyone anymore!" 

Su Tang puffed out his cheeks and nodded reluctantly. 

"Suman, where's Mom?" 

"Mom went to weed peanuts." 

"So, what about Daddy?" 

"Dad went to the second uncle's house to drink happy wine, and today Brother Qiming married his daughter-in-law." 

"Brother Qiming marries a daughter-in-law?" Su Yu almost didn't believe her ears, and a childish face immediately appeared in front of her. Qiming is only six months older than her, and he is her playmate from childhood to adulthood. After failing the high school entrance examination last year, he went to the city to do business. Later, he heard that he had lost money in business, so he came back to help his father plant fruit trees. He hadn't turned eighteen yet, so how could he get married so soon? 

"I heard that it was forced for my uncle. At first, Brother Qiming refused to live or die, but later his uncle beat him with a stick, saying that if he refused again, he would not be allowed to go home, and Brother Qiming later followed. I heard that his wife is three years older than him. "Su Yu's heart is not even more delicious, such a village, such parents, such a marriage...... 

With a heavy heart, Su Yu helped Su Jin clean up and cleaned the house again. It's almost dark. At this time, Pan Shixiong returned. 

He must have drunk a lot of wine again, which Su Yu had long expected, every time there is a happy event, as long as he is there, he will definitely come back drunk, as if someone else is drinking, he is fate, as if he will suffer if he does not come back drunk. I saw that his steps were vague and a little crooked, and he walked into the door. The triangular eyes that were narrowed into a slit were red and threaded, the sallow face was washed into the color of pig liver by the smell of wine, the beard was messily knotted on the upper and lower lips, as if it had not been repaired for a long time, and the hair was even more unkempt on the head, and I don't know how long it had not been trimmed. He burped and staggered into the room with squinting eyes. There was a strong smell of cigarettes and alcohol in her face, and Su Yu almost didn't vomit. But he didn't seem to see Su Yu, and walked straight into the room, staggering open the door of the wooden cabinet, and then groping around what he was doing inside. Su Yu glared at him, not daring to step forward to look, Su Man Sutang was even more silent, not daring to approach a step, the three sisters and brothers just looked at each other, and didn't dare to say a word. Even Sojin seems to know that Dad beats and scolds people when he is drunk and is completely unreasonable and merciless. 

Finally, Pan Shixiong came out of it, as if he didn't realize the existence of his daughter and son, so he hummed an out-of-tune song and went to the kitchen, he took a bucket in his hand, picked up a spoon, opened the cauldron full of pig food that had just been heated and was ready to feed the pigs, and poured the pig food in the pot into the bucket spoonful by spoonful. The bucket and spoon were clean, not for feeding the pigs and filling them with food. As soon as Su Yu saw it, she understood seven or eight points in her heart, and immediately screamed to stop: "Dad! That's not a pig food bucket! How do you take a clean bucket and spoon and scoop the pig's food and feed the pigs?" 

"you, isn't this hot water, Lao Tzu wants to take a bath!" Pan Shixiong burped and scooped another spoonful into the barrel. 

Oh, my God! Su Yu hurriedly stepped forward to grab the hand holding the spoon sadly, "This is not hot water, it is pig food!" You know? It's pig food! Do you want to take a bath, I'll boil hot water for you later......" Before she could finish speaking, she received a heavy slap in the face, and as soon as her hand let go, almost immediately, there was another sharp pain in her forehead, and the burning pig food poured down her face, and her eyes were black, and the dense Venus shook in front of her eyes, and she almost fell with the shaking and scattered stars. It turned out that Pan Shixiong picked up a spoon full of pig food and hit her at the moment when she let go. "His grandmother's, you stinky girl who is not big or small, Lao Tzu wants to take a bath, and you dare to stop it? Lao Tzu takes a bath and it doesn't matter to you? It's obviously hot water but lied to me that it's pig food, do you think Lao Tzu is blind and crazy? You should have killed the pigs and chopped them to pieces!" As he spoke, he picked up his empty fist and hit Su Yu, who saw a big punch coming at him in the shaking of Venus, instinctively dodged, and luckily dodged it, and the second punch swung at her again, and dodged again. Pan Shixiong saw that he had failed to punch two times in a row, and he was a little angry, and continued to chase Su Yu with his fists while scolding. Su Man Sutang saw his father running around the house with red eyes and fists waving, and mustered up the courage to cry and rush up to hug his legs, holding hands. 

"Xiaoman Xiaotang, go quickly, you can't hold him!" Su Yu cried and stepped forward to rescue her younger siblings, but it was too late, Xiao Man had already been kicked, and Xiao Tang had also been slapped in the face. Seeing that his fists and feet were about to fall on their sister and brother again, Su Yu suddenly didn't know where the strength came from, and pushed him back, and Pan Shixiong fell to the ground with a stagger. Seeing this, the three sisters and brothers flew out together and fled. Su Jin stood at the door of the kitchen, watching the war between them, laughing and clapping his hands while eating: "Hee, hee, it's fun, it's fun." ”

Pan Shixiong got up from the ground in hatred, and the three of them had already run away. He knew that he couldn't catch up, so he stretched out his foot and kicked the plastic bucket over in hatred, and scolded in his mouth: "It's the opposite, it's the opposite, it's really the opposite, what do you do with your children?" Others raised children and let my father enjoy happiness, but the cubs I raised came to beat my father! I'm not going to take this Rausch bath anymore, never again!" As he spoke, he scolded and walked out of the kitchen, and just bumped into Su Jin, who was standing at the door clapping his hands, and slapped her, "It's fun for your mother!" 

"Wow......" Sojin cried in shock. Pan Shixiong didn't look at Su Jin, who fell to the ground, and staggered into the room. 

Su Yu and the others walked in with palpitations, but Pan Shixiong was gone, and they only saw Su Jin crying and rolling on the ground. The kitchen was a mess. Su Yu's tears were crawling all over her face, not for the scar on her head that was like a small mountain bag for the sharp pain on her head, but for ...... Su Yu tearfully cleaned up everything in the kitchen and boiled water to bathe Su Tang. 

Su Man went to the closet to get a change of clothes for Su Tang, and after a while, Su Man was inside and shouted, "Sister-come and see!" 

Su Yu panicked in her heart and hurriedly rushed over: "What's the matter?" 

"I don't know who peed in the cupboard." 

"Huh?" Su Yu approached, almost throwing up, and the cabinet smelled of urine mixed with tobacco and alcohol. Su Yu was dizzy for a while, she understood everything, it turned out that Pan Shixiong was groping in the cabinet to urinate when he first came in! He used the wardrobe as a pee! It emits an extremely unpleasant smell. Su Yu had no choice but to pull the clothes out of it one by one and put them in the basin, and at this time, the drunk Pan Shixiong was already lying on the bed and snoring loudly. 

It was almost dark, and Su Yu's mother came back from outside in the dark. She was only forty-two years old, but she looked like she was in her fifties, and her hair had turned prematurely gray and covered her head in a shaggy and messy manner. The pale face was also prematurely ravine-ravine, deep and shallow like the river of the water town south of the Yangtze River, and the eyes, which might have been bright and beautiful, were prematurely clouded by being filled with sorrow, and appeared large and hollow without brilliance. Life is mean to her, she has no father and mother since she was a child, she lives with her brother and sister-in-law, and marries here at the age of eighteen, Pan Shixiong only treats her as a tool for childbirth and a slave for work. And the hardships since she was a child have taught her only to be obedient and patient, and she rarely thinks of resisting, nor does she know how to resist. I got married at the age of eighteen, and I didn't give birth to my first child until I was twenty-three, but I was born with dementia. After giving birth to a daughter two years later, the next few litters were miscarriages, stillbirths, and it was not easy to raise a living one, but it was a woman. What's even more tragic is that two more children died before they could be formed. Her stomach has almost never been empty, but for more than ten years, she has only fed three girls. The village family planning committee visited her several times shortly after Su Man's birth and persuaded her to go for sterilization to respond to the country's call for family planning, but she refused to go for anything, saying that she would die without giving birth to a son. Pan Shixiong even stood guard at the door with a stick, jumping on his feet and saying to the visitor, if he is old and has no one to support you, can you be responsible? When he dies of old age, will you send him to the end?...... Others really can't do anything about him, fine, seeing that his family is even a problem to eat, move things, what do you move? Reason with him, how to say it doesn't make sense, in case the stick in his hand is picked up, it is just himself who suffers. Therefore, they had no choice but to turn a blind eye and let him die. Fortunately, after a series of life-and-death pregnancies, Tang Baozhu finally gave birth to a son. Tang Baozhu finally ended her twelve-year childbearing career and went to the hospital for surgery. However, this hard-won son did not bring much joy to this suffering family. Pan Shixiong is still addicted to alcohol and still gambles like mud. As long as he had a penny in his hand, he had to go to the table to bet on it, and as long as he had a dime in hand, he would go to the store to buy wine and drink it. Often, the big white pig that Tang Baozhu has worked hard to raise for more than half a year has no money before it is sold, and all of it is used to make up for the wine and gambling debts owed by Pan Shixiong. In order to prevent him from taking the money away, Tang Baozhu always changed the way to hide the money, but no matter where he put it, he had a way to find it, and after getting drunk and losing it, he came back to find their mother and son to vent his anger. At first, Tang Baozhu would cry and persuade him, but now, she has long been numb, because there is always only one result of crying and persuasion - being beaten! She had almost no sorrow and no tears, and if it weren't for the children, she would have died long ago. For the sake of her children, she lived like a machine obediently. She just hopes that one day when her children grow up, they can bring some turnaround. Therefore, she tried her best to get all three children to go to school, although she herself did not know a single word, but she knew that in order to be successful, she must know words. 

Seeing Suyu come back, she didn't show much joy. When she saw the bulging bag on Su Yu's head and Su Tang's swollen face, she asked lightly, "Was that person beating you?" 

Su Yu bit her lip and silently did not answer. 

"How do you do so much laundry?" 

"The clothes were soaked with water." Su Yu lied temporarily. 

"How so?" 

"It's not water, it's wet." Sutang is young after all. 

"Pee? Who did this to you? Is that person again?" 

Everyone was silent. Su Jin was still "whining" and sobbing non-stop. 

"Alas...... What a wreck!" Tang Baozhu sighed. I was busy cooking again. 

At dinner, Pan Shixiong was still snoring like mud, and no one dared to wake him up. Thinking that he should be able to sleep until tomorrow morning, he was too happy not to call him. Without him at the dinner table, the atmosphere was much better. 

The next day, Pan Shixiong slept until almost lunch, and at the dinner table, no one spoke, and everyone buried their heads in the bowl of rice. Pan Shixiong probably found it boring, and was about to find something to say, when he suddenly looked up and saw the swollen mountain bag on Su Yu's head, and asked, "Ayu, how did you get it on your head?" 

Su Yu didn't know how to answer for a while, so she had to bury her head in eating and replace her answer with silence. 

This angered Pan Shixiong, he stared at Su Yu with his eyes, and suddenly "snapped" the bowl in his hand on the table, and scolded: "Damn, Lao Tzu kindly asked you, you dare to ignore Lao Tzu!" Your mother just came back from studying, and she didn't come back from moving gold and silver from outside. The wings haven't grown hard yet, so learn to fly! Don't forget, what you eat, live and use is still Lao Tzu! You have books to read, and I still give you a blessing! You don't have to be angry in front of me!" No one in the family answered, everyone was bored to eat, and they didn't dare to come out. Pan Shixiong probably scolded enough, and he had almost eaten, so he punched the table and walked out of the door with a wave of his sleeves. Leaving five people stunned and stunned, they looked at each other. They knew that when Pan Shixiong went out this time, he must have gone to the gaming table again. 

At two o'clock in the afternoon, Pan Shixiong finally came back with a black head and gray face, and as soon as Su Yu saw him, her heart was cold to the soles of her feet. He's definitely lost again! It seems that if you want to ask him for money, you will only ask for a beating and scolding. Besides, he had just him off this morning. Even in normal times, begging him for money is still a small star, and a big one is scolding and sticking. Or throw the money at your feet: "Take it, Xianshibao, when you grow so big, you will only reach out and ask people for money!" At this time, Su Yudu just silently picked up the money from the ground, and he didn't dare to take it out. It's a blessing to get the money. 

If it weren't for her aunt's sponsorship for her studies and life, she would have gone out to work like other girls. Every semester, my aunt would help her pay her tuition and give her another hundred or dozen. Although she can't save any more at school, Pan Shixiong, if you don't take it from him, you will never give her a penny. Fortunately, there are dozens of dollars in scholarships every semester and her mother's occasional subsidy of ten or eight yuan, otherwise, she really doesn't know how to live. Now, she has almost nothing left, since the beginning of the school year, what material fees, tuition fees, class dues...... A whole list of names is money. She really didn't know what to do with the exam fee of fifty yuan and another week's food expenses this week. Mom wouldn't have that much money, and even if she had, she couldn't bear to use it, because her mother didn't know how much effort it took to endure how many tears she had to accumulate. But what should she do? 

Seeing that the time passed minute by minute, she was anxious and conflicted, and she was swallowed hard several times when she wanted to speak, especially when she saw Pan Shixiong's flat face, she didn't have the courage to speak at all. Finally staying up until five o'clock, she anxiously crossed her fingers and walked up and down the door. Several times, the words were already on the tip of her tongue, but as soon as she raised her head and saw Pan Shixiong, she couldn't say anything more. She pushed out the bicycle, gritted her teeth and mustered up the greatest courage, looked at the ground with her eyes, and quickly said, "Dad, we have to pay fifty yuan for the examination fee, you ......."

"I'll just say it's not good for you to come back! Aren't you amazing? Still asking me for money? Don't say I don't have any money, and even if I did, I wouldn't give you a penny! If you want money to earn yourself, don't reach out in front of me!" This roar shattered Suyu's heart. She pushed her bike and quickly stepped on it and sped forward. She couldn't even hear Pan Shixiong scolding behind her. It seems that there is also her mother's screaming and scolding in the middle of her father's scolding, but she doesn't want to stop and take her mother's money, which is too heavy for her to pick up. She stepped on the pedals so fiercely, she just wanted to move forward, forward, and only hoped that the evening breeze could blow away the troubles of home, money, and education...... 