Lin Kongkong had already woken up when Bai Chenfeng reached out to unbutton her clothes, but she didn't know what posture to use to face him, so she simply pretended to be asleep, which could avoid a lot of embarrassment.

It wasn't until he went out that she got up with difficulty, walked into the bathroom, and undressed in front of the huge mirror. In fact, she is afraid, for a woman, no one will not care about what her body has become.

She clearly knew what she had experienced, general anesthesia, thoracotomy, cardiac arrest, machine beating, surgical suturing, and finally heart rebeat.

There are many people who go to the last step, but their hearts can't beat, so at that time, all she thinks about is whether she can live or not, and she doesn't care about the wound at all.

Now, the threat from life is gone for the time being, and he cares so much, so this has become something she has to pay attention to.

She saw the shocking scar on her body, and the slightest movement was excruciatingly painful, and she knew it was because she had sawed off her sternum during the open heart surgery.

One wound was left by heart exchange surgery, and the other was a cesarean section, such a body couldn't even stand himself, no wonder he had such a big reaction when he saw it.

These scars seemed to be a big pit buried in her, and he was standing outside the pit, but she couldn't climb up.

And what makes her heart croil the most is still the heart she replaced, the body may have a rejection reaction at any time, and she will never get rid of the fact that she is a patient.

She had seen a patient with cancer in the hospital before, and after several rounds of chemotherapy, her temperament had changed drastically and she was on the verge of emotional collapse.

She doesn't know if illness can change a person, and she has always thought that her mind is peaceful, but at this moment, the resentment in her heart still can't be suppressed no matter what.

Yes, she has a grudge in her heart. She is an ordinary person, she has always had good intentions, she has never hurt anyone, and she has never done anything against her conscience.

But what did she get? A sick body, a broken body...... Unfair, unfair......

No matter how unfair she is, she can't do anything, among all living beings, she is as small as an ant, and she is still alive today, but she can't let go of it with the trace in her heart.

She straightened her clothes with a pale face, tried her best to control her trembling from the inside out, and walked out of the ward calmly. was originally a fairly stable mood, but when I saw the person sitting on the ground, I couldn't help it in an instant.

Her Xiaobai always doesn't care much about anything, cold and arrogant, but very powerful, as if there is nothing in this world that he can't solve, and there is nothing he can't bear.

But now, how could he be so downcast? So fragile again? It's because of her! Because of her terrible wounds, but also because of her lingering sick body.

"Little white ......," she whispered, vaguely accompanied by crying.

Bai Chenfeng raised his head suddenly, his eyes touched her, and he got up in a hurry, his tone mixed with a little anxiety: "Aren't you sleeping?" How did it come out? Well? ”

"Didn't you sleep next to me too? And how did it end up here? ”

"I ...... I couldn't sleep, I came out to breathe, the room was too stuffy. ”

Maybe Bai Chenfeng himself knew that this excuse was a bit lame, so what he said was a bit of a stumbling one.

"Didn't you not want to see it? Why are you disobedient? I don't think you're so curious. ”

"I'm not curious, I'm just wondering what you've been tortured like after going through this surgery......"

Lin Kongkong's nose was sore, she lowered her head and was silent, her wound hurt when she sobbed, and when the wound hurt, she couldn't control the urge to cry. She thought that she might have really been suppressed for too long, otherwise she wouldn't have cried at this time.

"Don't cry......" Bai Chenfeng whispered to reassure.

"Then you saw it...... Why are you still sitting here? Is it my wound that scares you? ”

"It's not...... I just can't accept it for a while, don't think about it, okay? ”

Lin Kongkong shook his head: "I know I'm ugly now, and I know what I'm going to face in the future, if you want to let go, I ......"

Bai Chenfeng's eyebrows and eyes were instantly cold, and the feeling of not being understood made him feel a dull pain in his chest, he hooked the corners of his lips, and said in a sarcastic tone: "What do you think I like about you?" Your pretty face, or your body. Body? ”

Lin Kongkong didn't mean that, she just hoped to talk about this matter, so that he would stop worrying about it, let alone have any psychological burden, and now that he was questioned so sharply, she didn't know how to answer for a while.

"If I paid attention to skin appearance, I wouldn't have chosen you at all!" He said angrily.

Any woman will feel uncomfortable when she hears this sentence, especially from the mouth of her lover. She knows that she is not worthy of him, whether it is appearance or ability, there are so many girls who like him who are better than her, and she is just the most ordinary one among them.

She was afraid that if she continued to talk to him, she would not be able to control her emotions, so she turned around and went back to the ward.

Bai Chenfeng regretted it after his last sentence, after so many years, he would not fail to understand her thoughts. She was always cautious, always felt unworthy of him, and was always a little on thin ice.

His words just now would undoubtedly make her worried, an emotion she must not have now. felt remorse and blame herself for a while, she had two major surgeries in succession, why did he bother with her and make her unhappy?

He strode into the hospital room and saw that she was lying quietly on the bed, with her back to him, as if she was sleeping.

He knew that she was not sleeping, so he took off his shoes and went to bed, although the ward was a VIP room, but the hospital bed was a single bed. Before, Lin Kongkong deliberately let some, and the two of them could barely sleep, but now she not only refused, but also deliberately lay in the middle, and there was no place for Bai Chenfeng.

He didn't dare to touch her, for fear of touching her wounds, so he flattered awkwardly: "You let me, I will be squeezed out of the ground by you." ”

Lin Kongkong moved his body slightly, the wound hurt so much that she inhaled cold air, Bai Chenfeng was distressed, grabbed her from behind, and called softly: "Mengmeng......"

Lin Kongkong was called by him like this, and the tears that she had endured for a long time couldn't hold back anymore, she sobbed lowly, aggrieved and pitiful.

"I ...... I didn't mean to say those things to you, don't take them to heart, okay? ”

"You also said it unintentionally, you are always like this, you want me to let you at any time, but you can never let me go."

"I didn't."

"You have, you have. I haven't said anything yet, you said it so ruthlessly, I'm like this now, how tormented my heart is, even if I'm willful, can't I do it at all? Can't you pamper me a little bit, no matter what time it is? ”

She said so much, which is a big drain for people who have just had open heart surgery. All she felt was that her throat was dry and painful, and it was difficult to breathe, and her panting gradually became thicker.

Bai Chenfeng keenly sensed that something was wrong with her, he got up neatly, picked her up with gentle movements, and straightened out the messy hair on her forehead for her, looking at her nervously.

"Mengmeng, you...... Are you okay! Don't scare me. ”

Lin Kongkong shook his head: "It's okay...... It's just that there is some pain in my chest. ”

"I'll call a doctor." Bai Chenfeng was about to go out as he spoke, Lin Kongkong took his hand and said not very smoothly: "I'm fine, it's useless for you to call a doctor." ”

"But you...... But don't you hurt? ”

"I'm hurting because my heart has been replaced, my sternum has been severed, it's a wound, it's waiting to heal, you call the doctor, she can't do anything."

Bai Chenfeng instantly became powerless, there were some things he could change, and some things he couldn't change. Now she is suffering so much, even if he wants to change, he can't change it, even if he doesn't want to admit it, he has to admit that human power is still limited after all.

"And do you want to lie down for a while?"

Lin Kongkong rested for a while, his breath was much calmer, seeing that his eyes were full of worry, and the pent-up depression in his heart was evacuated a lot, but it was still a little awkward, so he said in a good tone: "I was lying down well, but you had to ask me to give up the place, and then you hugged me, then you can hold it!" ”

Her tone sounded obviously angry, and even a little rude and willful, but Bai Chenfeng was not angry at all, but liked it tightly.

"If you let me hold it, you just hold it like this for a long time, won't you feel uncomfortable?"

Lin Kongkong didn't plan to really let him hug him, such an awkward position was not comfortable at all for her, a person after surgery. But in the current situation, if she is not tired of being in his arms, isn't it a little cheaper for him?

She stared at him with a pair of clear eyes, and Bai Chenfeng didn't speak, just stared at her with big eyes. After a long time like this, Lin Kongkong felt that his eyes were very sour, so he lowered his eyebrows, like an angry little daughter-in-law.

As soon as she quieted down, Bai Chenfeng could only admit defeat, not to mention that he didn't have the will to spend it with her, she was not afraid of pain, but he was afraid that something would happen to her. Sure enough, if you are sincere, you are destined to be controlled by others.

He gently put her on the bed and pulled the quilt for her, while he sat in front of the bed, looking at her with gentle eyes.

Lin Kongkong was still awkward in his heart just now, but this moment was cloudy and clear, because she saw the red blood in his eyes. These days, she suffers, and he doesn't have a good time, and he doesn't sleep when he comes up for a good night's sleep.

"You'd better sleep with me for a while! You sit in front of me like this, and I can't sleep. ”

Bai Chenfeng stared at her for a while, and the ink color in his jade-like eyes was surging, and it was a bottomless affection. Just when Lin Kongkong thought he would say something, he swaggered into bed, reached out to grab her waist, and closed his eyes.

Lin Kongkong looked at him for a while, and found that he was sleeping seriously, without moving his eyelids, she looked at it and became sleepy, sleeping quietly in his arms.