Asitaya is sick.

He had been thinking about Stellar Energy Engineering, and his study was full of calculus papers, maybe thousands, maybe tens of thousands, all scribbled handwriting, which were covered in thick layers on the floor, and it felt hard to step on.

Those are all algorithms and information about Kamigawa's star technology, which Asita has been copying for a long time.

Stellar Energy Engineering has been stuck in the introductory stage, and his pressure is very high, but it just so happened that there was a space pirate invasion half a month ago, although their technical level and scale are far inferior to the Kamigawa army twenty years ago, but Shurima, who is about to forget that fear, can't afford this kind of thing to happen again.

After the invasion, as the Cabinet Commander-in-Chief, he should have been called to discuss how to deal with the invasion, but when he arrived at the scene, His Majesty the Emperor had already made a decision and only informed himself.

Of course, Assitaya knew that this was true, because there was nothing anyone present could do except Azir.

And later, after discovering that Azir was in time to appear on all the battlefields, he stood there like a fool again, helpless.

In the end, it was an ordinary warrior who stepped forward and used his life to keep Shurima's fears out, but what he did could not be known.

It's not fair at all! But Asitaya also knew that this choice was right, but he felt that he was responsible for this kind of thing.

Why has Stellar energy technology not progressed for a long time, not even the slightest breakthrough?

He questioned himself countless times in his heart, if there was a breakthrough in stellar technology at that time, and it could even be put into practical application, would it be not only His Majesty who had ascended? If that warrior also became an ascendant, did he also have the strength to fight those pirates? Isn't he going to die?

If there are enough Ascendants in Shurima, won't they be able to deal with the panic? So much so that this would not happen at all?

His paranoid personality blames everything on himself, which eventually develops into self-blame and anger, anger at himself for not accomplishing anything.

Asitaya was more focused on Kamigawa's materials than ever before, but he couldn't get into it, and no matter how high or low his mood was, it couldn't help the research work in the slightest.

Kamigawa's knowledge is too profound.

Assitaya refused to admit defeat, he forced himself to bury himself in the materials that were harder to gnaw than stones, and the food brought to him by the servant had been cold for several plates, and he had forgotten how long it had been since he had slept.

The numbers and formulas on those materials come together and become images of the war twenty years ago, and it is as if they have become a Kamigawa man who is on high above him, laughing loudly at his incompetence.

Asitaya had a splitting headache, and he brought countless calculation papers, and if he couldn't read them, he copied them, a hundred, a thousand, ten thousand, a million.

Having mastered all the knowledge of the planet, he behaved like a hysterical schoolboy, crazy and helpless.

He hoped that he could find a breakthrough in copying over and over again, but the more he copied, the more he couldn't understand it, but instead became uncomfortable, his chest was blocked, and the pressure became more and more intense, and finally he couldn't support it and collapsed.

When Azir came to visit him, Asitaya was lying on the bed, but his mouth was still swearing, and he told the damned servants to hurry up and bring him the Kamigawa information! He hasn't finished his research yet!

Azir saw that he had lost a lot of weight than before, his beard was not shaved, his eyes were red and bloodshot, and his expression looked like he was about to eat people.

"I'm sorry, Asitaya...... I didn't expect this job to put so much pressure on you...... Maybe I should leave it to the more professional people in the Academy of Sciences......"

Azir did regret it, he had thought that Asitaya and Nasus were the two most knowledgeable people on the planet, and Asitaya's resume could help him adapt to the planning of the stellar energy project more quickly.

But he didn't expect it to backfire, but instead he became a human being and a ghost.

Ashitaya rejected Azir, almost crying out for him to give him another chance, for there was no one on this planet who knew more about astronomy and the stars than he did.

Asitaya is resolutely opposed, he thinks that he can definitely succeed, and finally has a way to let Shurima rise, or from his own hands, how can he let it be given to others?

He really wanted to rediscover his love for the stars.

Azir could only persuade from other aspects: "This project is not rushed, my original plan was to achieve it through the joint efforts of a thousand years and generations, and I don't want to see you push yourself so hard now." ”

But Asitaya said his opinion: "This project must be realized as soon as possible!" Play hard! Unscrupulous implementation! As fast as you can! It's okay to be without the body, this stellar technology must be realized! Because we ...... I really can't go through that again! Who can guarantee that it won't happen tomorrow? ”

Azir knew what he meant, and he was helpless, so he could only hand him the notebook he got from the pirate engineer, which was about nuclear-powered ships, and some understanding of nuclear power was similar to the stellar energy transportation technology he needed, and it seemed to be somewhat related to Kamigawa's technology.

Assitaya searched through it day and night, and finally he found some way to carry energy, which made him more excited, more oblivious to sleep and food, and his body was worse day by day, and he was paranoid to the extreme.

One night, while studying the data on the table, Asitaya suddenly felt a heat in his nose, and then a drop of red liquid dripped on the paper, he reached out and touched it, sticky and warm.

So he decided to get up and wash it or it would get dirty.

When he got up, Asitaya felt the sound of the chair moving extremely harsh, and his waist was also a little painful, but he didn't care about this, he had to hurry up and clean it, and he had to continue to study the materials when he came back.

But as soon as he took a step, he felt that the world was spinning, and then, the whole world went dark.

The hands of the clock were reversing rapidly, and he was back in the peaceful days when he remembered his mother's name was Taya.

At that time, Nasus's work was at a critical moment, it was about promotion or not, and he didn't have time to go home, only Taya was always with him.

The love for the starry sky also came from the influence of his mother, the night sky of Shurima was very clear at that time, and no one ever thought about what was in that deep darkness, they only thought that the night sky shining with countless stars was beautiful.

Taya would often tell him stories of the stars, and the heroes of old, as well as their ancestors, would turn into stars in the sky when they died, watching over their successors and protecting the world.

On one of Asitaya's birthdays, Nasus miraculously returned from a leave of absence and gave Asitaya a telescope that would allow him to see the stars in the heavens at night.

It was the only day when father and son didn't fight.

In return, Asitanya gave Nasus a pipe, but he thought, after all these years, he guess he would have lost it long ago, right?

Asitaya liked the telescope very much, and often pestered Taya to watch the stars with him, but once, the sky was full of dark clouds, and there was no light in the night sky, and the whole world was covered in darkness, and soon after it rained again, and thunder rolled.

Nasus still didn't return, and the young Asitaya was scared, so Taya kept comforting him.

He asked Taya, "Mother, those ancient heroes can't see us anymore, we are blocked by dark clouds, will we be in danger?" ”

Taya lit a candle and said with a smile, "The heroes of ancient times also had times when they encountered darkness, but they still became heroes. ”

"Why aren't they afraid of the dark?"

"Of course they're afraid."

Taya held the candle close to him, and the faint light of the fire illuminated Asitaya's chubby face, his eyes dancing with a sparkling light.

"But they will light their own light, little Asi, don't be afraid, this lamp will stay on until the sun rises."

When Asitaya woke up again, all he could see was the pure white ceiling, and there was a ticking sound in his ears, which was the equipment used to monitor the hospital wards.

When he woke up, it was already night, and the servant who was guarding him was groggily holding his chin with his hands, and the sound of Asitaya sitting up woke him up, and the servant hurried to call the nurse.

After making sure that Asitaya was all right, the servant breathed a sigh of relief.

He learned from his servants that both Azir and Nasus had come to see him during the time he was unconscious, and he was amazed that Nasus would come to see him as well.

Asitaya glanced out the window, it was pitch black, and then saw his own reflection on the glass.

Haggard, dry, lifeless, like a candle about to burn out.

Then he saw something on the table.

It was a family portrait, Asitaya was still a chubby little imp, Nasus pinched his face, and Asitaya pinched back in disbelief, tears of pain rolled in their eyes, and the woman who was not very good looked covered her mouth and smiled at them, her eyes full of happiness.

The night was late and quiet, he didn't turn on the light, but just asked someone to bring a candle and light it, the fire became stronger and stronger, the candle became smaller and smaller, and there was always a time when it melted.

I don't know how long it took, the flame on the candle was extinguished, but it was not very dark in the room, and the light came in.

Asitaya hadn't slept, he looked at the light source, and it was a sky full of stars.

After the time of crisis, Asitaya became the first person in this land to face the stars, he was weak at that time, but he was no longer afraid of the darkness, and he found that the picture that he had forgotten so many years ago was so beautiful!

If this beautiful starry sky can't belong to Shurima, then what is the purpose of its existence?

What is the meaning of my existence?

……

Oh, just to make this starry sky belong to Shurima!

He looked at the already melted candle and prepared everything:

"Mother, I will become a candle, and when it burns out, the sun will rise."