Chapter 123

Du Zhengyi looked at Luo Qi and said calmly, "If he gets the love of his mother, then he will long for his mother's protection, and if he gets his mother's protection, he will hope that the family will not be so poor." With no money at home and being looked down upon by others, he still has a reason to twist it, and he still has a chance to be chosen by the devil to kill one day. So, Roach, you're not him. ”

Luo Qi looked at Du Zhengyi in astonishment, Du Zhengyi's gaze was very deep, and he rarely noticed that Du Zhengyi would look into the depths when he looked at people. Du Zhengyi seems to be always in his eyes, and even now he has a hint of rational coldness, but he rarely opens his heart to others, and Luo Qi knows that it is a warm place of understanding.

He choked up and endured it again, as if looking at his lifesaver in the vast dark ocean.

Du Zhengyi continued, "After satisfying the first wave of cravings, the human heart will spread to the second wave, and there will never be a day when it will be satisfied. People who are not strong-willed can always find reasons for themselves, and the reasons for the subjective world are endless. Even if you don't have parents, your willpower is not as soft as it seems on the outside, and even if you rely on your own strength, you will still continue to walk. No matter how many people say you're a monster, you have to know exactly what you are. They also say I'm a monster, do you see I care? What makes us different from monsters is known only in our own hearts. ”

Another choked sob, Roach said vaguely, "I'd rather not have parents myself, just like you." ”

Du Zhengyi laughed somehow, as if he thought the conversation was quite funny here, "Luo Qi, I didn't jump out of a stone, I also have parents." ”

Roach didn't speak, wiping his tears in shame. He wanted to swear that it was the first time he had cried since he was fifteen, but he felt that the words themselves were childish like twelve. "Do you miss them?"

"I" Du Zhengyi hesitated for a moment, "I can't remember anymore." I lived with my parents until I was eight years old, and I remember that my father was a very gentle man, a bit pedantic, and often taught me to memorize poems. My mother now thought that she should be a lively and beautiful woman. ”

"And then they sent you to Qionglin?" Arch desperately wiped away the last bit of tears, eager to continue saying something else.

"My parents died of an epidemic, a contagion, or a plague? I don't know what it's called, how to say it. Du Zhengyi lowered his head, those past events that had never been spoken, and the feelings that came out of his mouth made him feel strange. He sometimes thinks he's forgotten, but he also knows that these things have never been forgotten. "Pei Shu found me and took me away, and I survived."

Luo Qi was stunned for a while, looked at Du Zhengyi, and said unconsciously, "I'm really grateful to Pei Shu." ”

Du Zhengyi smiled slightly, with an indescribable sadness in his expression, "I don't know." They took me away and told me that if I stayed with my parents, I would get infected and die. But my only desire at that time was to be held in my mother's arms, even if I died with her. This thought is still in my heart, and it is still my regret. ”

Luo Qi looked at Du Zhengyi, just looking, but suddenly he started crying. Du Zhengyi was startled and looked at Luo Qi in astonishment.

Luo Qi said inarticulate in his cry, "Du Zhengyi, if I didn't know that you don't like physical contact, I would definitely hug you now." ”

Du Zhengyi was stunned and laughed, but gradually, the sadness and sorrow in his heart became stronger and stronger. He couldn't tell if it was his own emotion in the first place, or if the grief of Roach, a high-level telepath, was too intense, and the radiation catalyzed his emotions. But if Rocky's grief is too strong, it is also for his sake, and he still can't bear it. Who would cry out loud about a war machine?

Du Zhengyi slammed open the corner door of the courtyard, "Mahjong, I have something to tell you, follow me to the front yard." ”

The doors of the hall were all open, the sunlight was half falling in, and Guan Xinyue was setting up a rice bowl in the hall.

"Oh, that's nice." Guan Xinyue threw the chopsticks back on the table, "Anyway, I'm busy in vain." ”

Mahjong lazily stood up from behind the dining table and patted Guan Xinyue on the shoulder. "Girl, wait a minute."

"Where's Roach?" Guan Xinyue frowned and looked at the empty door behind Du Zhengyi.

Du Zhengyi didn't answer, turned around and walked to the front yard. Mahjong silently followed him through the courtyard that he had just renovated yesterday, entered the front hall, and then turned along the path under the eaves to the courtyard next door, where was the library of the former school.

The courtyard here is much more spacious than elsewhere, with a few maple trees planted in the yard, and Du Zhengyi stopped under one tree and turned his head to look at Majiang.

Ma Jiang's face was originally unhappy, and he was still in the same state as when he quarreled with Du Zhengyi just now, but seeing Du Zhengyi's expression, his tense facial muscles slowly relaxed. He had never seen hesitation and sadness on Du Zhengyi's face, Du Zhengyi, a bastard, had always been only bullshit and disdainful, so as long as he saw such helplessness, it really offset the anger that followed him.

He wanted to ask Du Zhengyi what was wrong, but wisely did not speak first. With his hands in his pockets, he looked at Du Zhengyi almost dementedly, for fear that Du Zhengyi would buckle back the mask again.

"Ma Jiang," Du Zhengyi said, and broke it here again, as if a gust of spring breeze through the house and windows had blown his IQ off the line, and he looked as if he was suddenly speechless, not knowing what to say next.

"Uh-huh?" Ma Jiang felt that he should push him and give him a response, but God knew what to respond to, so his "um" ended up with a tone. tone, indicating interrogative sentences.

"Ma Jiang," Du Zhengyi took a deep breath, as if he had finally regained his courage, "Can I live longer?" ”

"Do you need to ask?" Ma Jiang sighed, he still thought something was wrong, "Didn't I tell you ten thousand times, doctor?" Say it a thousand more times a day, and how long you can live depends on how many times you use your abilities. Every time you gather strength, the walls in your mind become more fragile, and you are no longer fit to be a mage now. Be an ordinary person, you can live a little longer. ”

"How long?" Du Zhengyi said, smiled bitterly and shook his head, "After all, it won't be long." Doctor, is there any hope, even a glimmer of hope, that will solve the problem in my head? Du Zhengyi asked.

Ma Jiang looked at him for a moment before he said, "Among the people who are still alive in this world, the master who is best at healing consciousness damage is Luo Ruian. ”

Du Zhengyi's lips tightened.

"If anyone has any hope of overcoming this, it must be Rorian. The premise is that he is willing to do his best for your illness and concentrate on research, and it is possible for you to last a little longer. If we can last a little longer, and if Rorian is willing to work with me during this time, we can hopefully figure out a way to fix it. But you have sinned against his son in a way. ”