Volume I: Chapter 73: There Must Always Be a Goal
"Infection... There is no cure..."
The auditory hallucination was like the last straw that broke the camel's back and made Cesare's heart beat rapidly, and all the muscles in his body expanded and contracted with his heart, making the silver rings on his fingers tighten and painful.
The mood of wanting to make the illusion disappear has reached the extreme, and the whole person has come to the limit of collapse, and the next second is going completely crazy.
And suddenly.
The sound in his ears was gone, as if the sun had risen to dispel the ghosts, and the rare silence made Cesare breathe in a relaxed breath, and his mood slowly eased.
And slowly opened his eyes, at this time the surrounding area was still a dark cell, the cell door was tightened, nothing went out, and no one came in.
But from the bottom to the top, I saw a pair of familiar leather boots, a black and purple soft hair robe, and a high top hat......
Cesare never wanted to see a face in a red scarf in his life, but he met his smiling golden eyes.
Claudius, the head of the circus...... Like other hallucinations, his body was translucent, and through his clothes he could see the dark cell door behind him, and the edges of his body were blurred outlines, like a ghost returning for his life.
He pressed the top hat on top of his head, blinking his golden eyes at the embarrassed Cesare in front of him.
"Is this what you want, you crawled all the way back here just to die in a dark dungeon, and in the end you couldn't save your sister."
It was not surprising to hear Claudius mention his sister Cesare, after all, it was his own hallucination, and he naturally knew his own business.
Captain Claudius was dead, his heart had been crushed by his own hands and he had died in the forest, and what Cesare saw now was nothing more than an afterimage of his memory.
Although it was not as noisy as the ghostly one just now, and Claudius's hallucinatory voice was not so harsh, Cesare still had no intention of conversing with his hallucination.
His head still hurts, his stomach is upset, and Cesare is silent and just wants to rest.
Claudius's hallucinations vanished in place after Cesare chose to remain silent, but appeared out of thin air from the opposite corner, where he sat with his legs crossed, swaying and humming a circus tune.
"Liberty Bell,
Resounding through the earth and the sky here,
Look at our country, look at our freedom......
May everything be engraved in my heart forever......
Aha...... Liberty Bell ......"
Claudius's hallucinations hummed to himself, sometimes disappearing from his cell in a blur, sometimes appearing out of thin air kicking his boots and pacing in the darkness, no footsteps, just a non-existent shadow.
Cesare ignored whatever he was doing, knowing that he had seen the hateful ghost because of the pain of his brain twitching, and that the hallucinations would disappear as long as the fever subsided......
I don't know how long it has been, and I am only accompanied by the shadow of a dead man.
Claudius' apparition dissipated, and he sat down next to Cesare again, chains passing behind him and out in front of him, reinforcing the fact that he was an untouchable and disembodied illusion.
"Young Master, what does it feel like to kill someone with your own hands? Killing me was your first time killing someone, wasn't it as difficult as you imagined? ”
The hallucinatory sound instantly reminded Cesare of that night, his mycelium-covered paws digging out his bloody heart, staring at Claudius' eyes and crushing it......
And immediately, the memory remembers the day before when the circus convoy was attacked by robbers, one of whom jumped into the carriage and was pushed down by Cesare......
"You're not the first person I killed, the robber who attacked the convoy was, I watched him fall out of the car and break his neck......"
Cesare instinctively wanted to contradict Claudius, but as soon as he said it, he regretted that he had to be more serious about his hallucinations.
At last, he heard Cesare's hallucinations and giggled, habitually pulling the face towel off his face.
"It was just an accident, not a murder at all. But that time it was the same, although you didn't say it and didn't express your emotions, you were actually scared in your heart.
Since you were a child, you have been accustomed to playing the image of a mature and reliable adult in front of your only sister, and over time, you really think that your heart is strong enough to be able to deal with anything without being surprised. ”
As he spoke, Claudius' apparition slowly vanished, and he walked out of the black, cold wall on one side.
"But in fact, your strength only comes from the vacant family affection in your childhood, you don't dare to rely on others, you don't dare to get too close to others, because your subconscious fear that the people you love will disappear from your life like your mother."
Claudius walked from one end of the room to the other, raising her leg against the wall as she turned her body parallel to the floor, continuing to walk on the wall as if she were walking on the ground.
The mouth continued to mumble to himself.
"People must always have a goal in life, wealth, love, dreams, family, freedom...... And you, Master Cesare, never seem to have thought about it.
You cherish your sister so much because you use your only relative as an excuse to live day by day, if you lose even your own sister in the end...... You won't find the meaning of life, will you? ”
Claudius chuckled softly.
"You seem complicated, but in fact you are as simple as an idiot. From a young boy, you are as fragile as a fledgling, and you have never even walked over the trauma of losing a loved one, and all indifference is just a shield for your wounds. ”
His voice reverberated through the space, echoing in Cesare's head, and the headache that accompanied by a high fever was too much for Cesare to bear.
"Enough! What are you doing with so much nonsense from someone who is already dead? It's obviously all an illusion, even if you want to talk about the truth, can you change your face? Why it has to be Claudius! ”
Complaining, Cesare was not confronted by the real circus master, but by some voice from within.
I wanted to refute it, I wanted to deny everything it said, but Cesare could feel that no matter what he said, the other party would have ten thousand words waiting for him, and that the illusion existed only to torture himself and make it all more painful.
By this time, the phantom of Captain Claudius had reached the ceiling, and he was standing upside down on the roof of the dungeon, with his hands behind his back like a giant bat.
The top hat was completely impervious to gravity and fastened to the top of his head, but the scarf on his face drooped intentionally or unintentionally, revealing the appearance of a rabbit's lips underneath.
"I'm helping you Cesare, you know I've always been good at seeing people." He reached out and tugged at the face towel to cover his misshapen mouth, then let go of his hand, and the towel no longer drooped naturally.
"That's a bit of a long way off, do you know what it was like for me to kill someone for the first time?"