"You're back." I opened the door and took what he was holding and told him to change his slippers.

"Yes. He bent down to change his shoes.

"Sit down and rest, we'll be ready to eat." I pushed him into the couch and wanted him to rest first, there was a soup in the kitchen and I had to get it.

"You go wash your hands first." I put the dish on the table, said a word to Zhuo Yu, and then turned around and prepared to go to the kitchen again, but I didn't want to, but I was surrounded by one of his hands from behind.

I calmed down, put my hand on his hand that was holding my lower abdomen, and smiled and asked, "What's wrong?" "The voice is very soft, very soft.

He took a deep breath and then exhaled, "Thank you for your hard work." ”

I turned around and hugged his waist and looked him in the eye, "What's the matter, why are you talking about this?" Come and eat, fool. With that, he pulled him to the table and sat down.

"I'm going to wash my hands." He smiled and pushed me away to wash my hands, and I laughed too.

"What do you want to do today, I'll accompany you, and you won't have to go to work tomorrow and Saturday." Zhuo Yu stuffed a mouthful of food and said inarticulately.

"It's nothing," I replied to him, after looking up for a moment, "I'm a little tired today, I want to go to bed early, and I don't want to do anything else." ”

"What's wrong, isn't it feeling well?" He asked.

"No, it's just a little tired, I didn't sleep last night, okay." It's been like this all day, so tired that I don't want to do anything. "Zhuoyu, do you think I'm going to die?"

"What nonsense are you talking about?" He slammed my head with chopsticks and said sharply, "Okay, what kind of nervous are you, eat quickly." ”

I didn't say anything more, but took two bites of food and chewed it hard.

"Take it easy, I'll go out with you tomorrow. It's not good for you to be bored at home every day, move around more. Don't worry, isn't there still me? ”

"Yes," I laughed, "even if the sky falls and Li Juanyu carries it for me, what do I care?" I said satisfied, "Well, I'll add some soup for you." ”

Before going to bed at night, Zhuoyu sat on the bed playing with the computer, and I brushed my teeth in the bathroom.

The phone rang, and Zhuo Yu answered it twice, and then began to call me, "Xingzhu, your phone, come out and answer it." ”

"Who?" I walked out with a towel, took the phone, and asked him as I wiped the toothpaste foam off my mouth. Li Zhuoyu shook his head at me, he didn't know.

"Hey, who are you?" I just stood by the bed and picked up the phone.

The voice sounded over there, and I heard the back of my head go blank, as if I didn't know anything, and the air seemed to freeze and suffocate me.

Putting down the phone, I didn't know what to do anymore and just stood there still. An inexplicable feeling came over me, making me want to cry but I couldn't.

"What's wrong with you?" Shui Yu noticed my abnormality, raised his head and asked me, "Who called and what happened?" Xingzhu, what's the matter? He reached over and pulled me.

I was stunned for a moment, and as soon as he pulled him to the bed, he began to cry, and he was frightened by my sudden action.

"Xingzhu, Xingzhu, what's going on? Xingzhu, what are you crying about, what are you telling me? He put his arm on my shoulder and asked, "What are you talking about, what happened, who called?" Don't cry, tell me what's wrong. Okay, okay, don't cry, don't cry, it's okay, don't cry. "He hugged me and coaxed me.

"My grandmother is sick, my grandmother is going to die, what should I do if my grandmother is going to die?" I cried and said, "My uncle just called to say that my grandmother is very sick and wants me to go back." Zhuoyu, what should I do, what should I do? ”

In fact, when I was young, I was always afraid of my grandmother, and even hated my grandmother, because I felt that she never cared about me, I felt that she didn't like me at all, and I always regarded my grandmother as a non-existent and inconsequential person, and I thought maybe she thought so too, a non-existent and inconsecable little girl.

But why did my heart hurt so much and feel so uncomfortable when my uncle told me that she was seriously ill?

"Okay, okay, don't worry, I'll go back and see her tomorrow, okay? Don't worry, it'll be fine, don't cry. "Li Lianyu hugged me and comforted me.

"Do you think she's going to die?" I looked up at him, tears welling up in my eyes. I've never been close to her, but I don't want her to walk away like that.

"No, she'll be fine. Rest assured, she'll be fine. His tone was extremely soft.

"Really, will she really be okay?" I asked him for confirmation, and I was extremely uneasy.

"Yes, it will be fine." He said, helped me lie down, covered me with the quilt, "Don't worry, sleep for a while, sleep." Get a good night's sleep, go back tomorrow, and go to see your grandmother tomorrow. "He comforted me like a child.

I obediently listened to him, closed my eyes, and then felt a warm, gentle, safe kiss from him on my cheek, and I rolled over and fell asleep peacefully.

Zhuo Yu asked for leave from the company and wanted to go back with me. He went to book tickets, accompanied me to pack my things, comforted me, and he was taking care of me all the way, bringing water and food for me, and persuading me to put my mind at ease and be fine.

When I was woken up by Zhuo Yu, the plane had already stopped at Kunming Airport. After getting off the plane and changing to a car, although it is not the peak tourist season, there are still tourists coming and going outside the car window. I felt extremely tired, I didn't want to enjoy the scenery along the way, I just wanted to go home quickly.

After getting out of the car, stepping on the bluestone slabs of the ancient city, and walking in the wet alleys, my heart had already flown to my home, and the pedestrians made me feel extremely irritable.

When I stood in front of the antique vermilion lacquer gate of my house, I didn't have the courage to push it open. With his hand on my shoulder and a hard shake behind me, I looked back at him and he gave me a smile and encouraged me to open the door in front of me.

I took a deep breath, then exhaled, looked at the wooden door that was familiar and unfamiliar to me from my childhood, and pushed it open. The courtyard was silent, not much different from when I left three years ago, and a few pots of flowers in the corridor below were blooming brightly, and ivy green dotted the courtyard with spring colors.

A boy came out of the house, my cousin, and I hadn't seen him grow much taller in a few years.

"Ah Tao!" I called his name, he looked up, and I saw surprise in his eyes.

"Cousin?" Ah Tao cried out in surprise, "Is that you, cousin?" He immediately ran to me.

"Grandma, Cousin Xingzhu is back, Grandma, Grandma." He took my hand and shouted excitedly into the room, this boy is still so frightened.

I saw my aunt coming out of the house in a panic, and her eyes immediately turned red when she saw me, "Xingzhu, you're back, come into the house." My aunt took me by the hand and went inside.

"Auntie, don't worry, haven't I come back already." I said, putting my arm around her thin shoulders.

"Come back, just come back, Xingzhu, come into the house, come into the house, come into the house." My aunt pulled us in, "You're Zhuoyu, thanks to you for taking care of our family Xingzhu, thank you so much." ”

"Auntie, you are serious, this is what I should do, I should be." Zhuo Yu hurriedly said.

"Auntie, how is my grandmother, is she better?" I asked as soon as I sat down.

"Hey, don't worry, I'm finally out of danger," my aunt breathed a sigh of relief, "I'm still in a coma in the hospital, and I don't know when I'll wake up." ”

"What kind of illness do you have, my uncle called me yesterday, and I was almost worried about dying."

"Sudden cerebral hemorrhage." My aunt was still a little scared when she said, "I was drying clothes in the yard, and suddenly I fainted, which scared me to death." Sent to the hospital, said that it was a cerebral hemorrhage, the situation is very urgent, thanks to the timely rescue, I am afraid to think about it now. ”

"So what's going on now, it's not a big deal, right?" My aunt said that I was anxious and scared, and I was even more anxious and scared when I heard it.

"Don't worry, your uncle is watching her in the hospital now, and the doctor said it's nothing serious." My aunt said and came to pull me again, "You guys go and rest first, you must be tired after sitting in the car for so long, let's go rest first, and we'll go to the hospital later." ”

"No, I'd better go and see it now, I can't worry." I said and came to my aunt to go, "Let's go, which hospital?" ”

"Don't worry, don't worry, I'll take you, my aunt will take you," my aunt patted my hand, "Don't worry, go now." ”

I met my uncle in the hospital, and after a few pleasantries with him, I came to see my grandmother. When I saw my grandmother, who was in a coma on the hospital bed, extremely thin and senile, my tears fell like beads with broken threads. I didn't expect that my heart would hurt so much when I saw my grandmother, who I didn't want to see again when I was younger, and when I saw her lying so haggard.

"Uncle, how is grandma, haven't you woken up yet?" I stopped crying and wiped my tears.

"Not yet, but don't worry, it's stable now, it's not a big deal." My uncle came to comfort me, "You came here as soon as you came home, and you don't take a rest at home, come and sit down, don't all stand." ”

In the evening, we sat at the wooden table to eat, looking at so many people, and seeing my uncle and aunt A Tao, the wet and greasy warm feeling of our youth came back.

"Xingzhu, you eat more, if you haven't been at home for so long, you must want me to cook, eat more." My aunt kept serving me vegetables, and her kind face turned red with joy.

"Auntie, if you have less or less, I can't even eat it." I was all dead, and I was caught in the bowl of Zhuoyu again. I was very happy to see Lianyu drinking with my uncle, happy.

I didn't expect that my family and the people I love could sit together in such harmony and so happily to eat, drink and chat.

"Zhuoyu, our Xingzhu will entrust it to you." Uncle patted Zhuo Yu on the shoulder, "Please take good care of her, my Xingzhu life is hard, please make her happy." Okay, you have to treat her well, please. As the uncle spoke, he started crying, and he was at a loss.

"Uncle, what's wrong with you?" When I saw my uncle's appearance, I felt very uncomfortable.

"What's wrong with you, the kid is back and sitting next to you, look at what you're doing?" Aunt pushed him, "Xingzhu Zhuyu, don't pay attention to him." ”

"You don't understand, you don't understand, you let me speak, let me finish the sentence."

I haven't seen my uncle before, and I don't know what to do at once.

"Xingzhu, I know you are bitter, I know you are bitter in your heart," Speaking of this, he stopped and drank a slow glass of liquor, "Now that you have found someone who can take care of you, uncle, I am really happy for you, Xingzhu has really grown up." ”

After listening to my uncle's words, I couldn't help but feel sad. When I was a child, I was a lonely child, no one to play, no one to protect, to and from school is a person to walk, that road seems to be my alone, whether it is lonely on the road, small flowers, small grasses and small insects, everything is enjoyed by me alone. The children all laughed in groups, bullied me, scolded me for being a wild child, laughed at me for having no parents and no friends. My little heart was filled with hatred and anger. But I know that I have to endure, I have to endure, because I have no right to complain, no right to be wronged. I have no one to talk to, no one to rely on. If I want to be strong, I have to rely on myself, and I can only rely on myself to get rid of the people who bully me.

When I picked up a wooden stick and beat a boy who bullied me with all my strength, I saw him crying with his bleeding head and looking at me with fear, when I yelled in the rain and ran like crazy, when my grandmother looked indifferently at me countless times who had caused her countless troubles, I knew that I knew that if I wanted not to be bullied and wanted to be quiet on my own, I had to rely on myself. Only by relying on one's own strength and desperately resisting foreign invasion can one not be defeated and be firm.

"Xingzhu, I know that you must hate your grandmother very much, and you must also complain that I don't care about you well, I want to tell you something today." Uncle suddenly became serious.

Xingzhu, your grandmother used to be a very good teacher, and she was very strict with me and your mother. She arranged and arranged everything for us and didn't allow us to do anything she wasn't allowed. We are required to be admitted to a good university and lay out our life path.

I am a completely unassertive person, very obedient and appointing, following the path that your grandmother arranged for me, while your mother is very individual, when she falls in love with a foreign man who is more than ten years older than her, she ignores your grandmother's dissuasion, and even her coercion to sever the mother-daughter relationship as a threat.

Your mother has always been very well-behaved and obedient, but this is the only rebellion that has made your grandmother unbelievable and disappointed her. The man you love with your mother is a man who has come here from out of town and happened to rent our house, and he was later kicked out by your grandmother.

We thought this was the end of the matter, but what we never expected was that he left his address and contact information for your mother when he left, and then your mother left a note on the day we went out and ran away from home. Since then, your grandmother has been completely disillusioned with your mother and forbade me to go to her and not let me mention him.

Your grandfather died early, and it was your grandmother who raised us with a woman's weak shoulders to support our family. She was a teacher and trained many excellent students, but she felt that she did not teach her daughter well, so she resigned from teaching affairs since then.

What we didn't expect was that your mother would come back five months later, and I still remember how pitiful and thin your mother was, so helpless and so stubborn. Your mother and I hugged our heads and cried, but your grandmother stood in front of us and looked at us, she wanted to hug your mother, but she was so stubborn that she refused to reach out. Your mother knelt in front of her and called her, and she hugged your mother and cried.

Later, we learned that your mother was pregnant for several months, and your grandmother insisted that your mother kill the child, but your mother resisted and refused to agree.

At that time, your mother said to your grandmother, Mom, I know that you feel sorry for me and love me, because I am your child, but the child in my belly is also my child, and she also needs me to love me, Mom. Your grandmother didn't say anything after hearing this, and just like that, you were left behind.

You were only seven months old when you were born, you were born prematurely, you weighed less than four pounds, you were small and thin, and your little nails were transparent. In fact, your mother can't be regarded as a qualified mother, for your crying, she can't tell whether she is hungry, urinating, cold, hot, and she also cries when she sees you crying uncomfortably. I don't blame her, she was only 21 years old when she gave birth to you, and she didn't understand anything like a child.

Your grandmother has never shown that she cares about you, but she cares about you the most. When others are not paying attention, grandma will always gently hug you and coax you, seeing that she is cold and despises you on the surface, but in fact, she doesn't know how much she likes you and loves you.

She never picked you up and dropped you off when you went to school, but you don't know that every time you go to school with your school bag on your back, she will follow her until you enter the school gate. Every night, she will get up to cover you with a quilt, and she will be bullied by other children, and she will feel more uncomfortable than anyone else. What other children have, she will not let you be wronged, and she will do everything possible to get it to you. Your grandmother is like this, she never shows anything in front of us, in fact, she has you in her heart.

Xingzhu, I told you so much, you should understand what I mean, your grandmother doesn't love you, it's not that she doesn't love you, she loves you, she loves you very much. She knows and understands the grievances you have suffered, she would rather miss you than let you go, but she doesn't want you to go your mother's path again, and she doesn't want to be wrong again.

She gave you all the freedom she owes us to fly and run. You don't know how much she misses you, misses you, worries about you, and cares about you after you leave. And you, who have been gone for two or three years, have not come back to see it once, which also shows how much we have done to you and how much we do not care.

Xingzhu, my uncle knows that I don't care enough about you, you can resent me, but you must understand your grandmother, you must understand her, she really cares about you and loves you. Your mother's death hit her hard, and you are your mother's only daughter, the only memorial your mother left us, so it is also your grandmother's greatest sustenance, you must be considerate of your grandmother, do you know?

My uncle looked up at me, his eyes were red, I had never seen him cry, but I saw him today, but my heart was sore by that look.

"Uncle, don't worry, I remember everything you said, I understand everything." I said softly and slowly.

I never knew that there was such a story behind me, I didn't know that my grandmother actually cared about me very much.