This article is dedicated to all boys and girls who are now unhappy like Zhao Xiaoxiang:

The book "Dear Sanmao" contains Sanmao's reply to a person signed "an unhappy girl" - if I were you, this reply has warmed me again and again, and now, I want to share it with you.

NO.1 The meaning of life

As you walk, a wall suddenly appears in front of you, infinitely high upwards, infinitely deep downwards, infinitely far to the left, infinitely far to the right, and you want to step over it, but you can't do anything about it.

When the sense of loss of control of life and the confusion of the future pervade the whole body, we have repeatedly thought about the meaning of life, as if we can do anything, but as if we can't do anything, as if we have lowered our desire for everything, it is difficult to get real satisfaction and happiness.

Sanmao wrote in his reply: "What is the meaning and ultimate purpose of life, but at present I have only one answer, a very simple one, that is, 'seek true freedom' and then enjoy life."

Sanmao wrote with the most gentle strokes: "If I were you, the first thing to do is to increase the expectations and importance of self, sweep away the strings of inferiority complex words in the letter from life, and never despise yourself again." ”

also suddenly thought of Mingyue's sentence in "Those Things in the Ming Dynasty": "The so-called success is to spend your life in your own way, and slowly is the fastest." "Hopefully, we can all find the best way for us to spend our lives.

NO.2 Giving up is the beginning of bravery

When all education tells us not to give up easily, "having the courage to give up" seems to become a disgraceful thing. But, I want to tell you that giving up also means a new beginning, and it means that you will gain a lot of new things.

Sanmao wrote in his reply: "You have a legitimate career, you can afford to rent a room, your appearance is not bad, and you know how to further explore the meaning of life in addition to commuting, which is a very beautiful thing, why do you feel humble?" It is a pity that you feel humble because you are not looking at yourself with your own subjective eyes, but with the utilitarian eyes of society in general. It is difficult for a person who does not appreciate himself to be happy. ”

And appreciating one's own life may start by trying to give up and reject. Try to give up a relationship that is draining, give up a lifestyle that doesn't suit you, give up things you can't get no matter how hard you try, and dare to say "no" to things you don't like and are unfair. In fact, giving up may be the beginning of bravery.

Perhaps, when you are brave enough to gaze into the abyss, you feel that it is not so scary.

NO.3 I'm slowly changing

Sanmao said in his reply: "Practically speaking, not to talk about the empty method, if I live in what you call 'Dou Room', if it were me, the first thing I would do was to decorate my room. I would paint the room bright white, make myself a beautiful curtain on the window, I would put a small ordinary radio at the head of the bed, make a bookshelf in the corner, change the light bulb with a warm and warm lampshade, and then, I would go to the flower market, carefully pick a few beautiful bonsai and put them in my window. If I still have money to spare, I will buy a few copies of famous paintings and hang them on the wall......"

She said: "If I were you, I wouldn't wait for Sanmao to publish a new book, I would write my own notes and write them for my own appreciation, and I will slowly find that what I write myself also has style and interest, and I am really a lovely woman." ”

If a woman is spiritually impoverished, obsessed with being loved, and too eager to be recognized, it will be difficult for her to save her from her predicament, no matter how much power and resources she enjoys. Perhaps what should be done is to expand more hobbies that can spread your attention outward, such as sports, traveling, reading...... When you absorb some comfortable energy, it may be the real beginning of your happy life.