This is a mark left on the left finger, and the color of the skin in this circle is already like soaking in water for a long time, and it looks much whiter than the skin next to it, and even the color that is pale at first glance. This mark has been on this finger for several years, and if it weren't for the injury to the finger from the position of the temporary cameo soccer goalkeeper, I am afraid that I don't know when this circle-like mark will really return to the natural light, and enjoy the sun like the skin on all fingers, showing a little light bronza after ultraviolet radiation under the yellow skin.

Ever since I first learned about the ring, I never imagined that one day I would put this thing called a ring on my index finger. But one day I did it, and it is said that only widows can wear the ring on this finger. In the winter of the second year of my single life, when I passed by the gold jewelry store I used to use in the city, I bought it for some reason, and then inexplicably put it on my index finger, and this set has been on it for several years. Although I lost it once, I went to buy a ring of almost the same style on the third day and put it on again, only this time it was lowered from 20th to 19th. Perhaps it is because of this small change that such a circle falls on the index finger, like a different color that has been reminding me. Occasionally, because of the frost of the hand, it will be easier to move away a little, so it can be clearly found that the color of the fingers in this circle is changing a little bit, and it is fading a little bit.

After putting on this ring, the client once insisted that I graduated from the Academy of Fine Arts, perhaps because the work itself was often exposed to some advertising, or because of the relationship between the long hair and flowing in those years, for such a misunderstanding, in addition to the explanation, it seems to be somewhat self-deprecating. I can't associate myself with these artistic figures, but I don't know why so many people associate me with them, and even when I was working for a company, the boss said that the costumes for the year-end party were more suitable for my usual dress. Even in a company where all male colleagues in the company can't have long hair, I will be particularly acquiesced, should I really have so many connections related to ** in my life? I used ** because even I wasn't sure what the word should be, weird, fashionable, edgy, or something else, I wasn't sure or had no way of knowing.

But no matter what, the traces of this ring followed me until the first two days, when I had to not take it off because of the injury and a little blockage in my finger. The first feeling after taking it off was much smoother, but another feeling immediately followed, and suddenly it felt hollow, and I didn't know that there was a feeling of emptiness that took over the whole hand.

On the day I took off the ring, I would always unconsciously and often use my hands to stroke the pale traces, is this a space I have left for myself over the years, a thing like reincarnation, round without a little out of shape, along the fingers along the life has been constantly changing. from youthful independence to existential independence; From single to single again; From loneliness to loneliness; From Lost to Lost...... I always want to give myself an answer in the middle of the night, but the result of the answer is just more why! Today may analyze a why, but tomorrow will add more whys, life seems to be constantly analyzing these whys and living, survival seems to have become a way to increase why. Repeatedly intertwined with the never-ending questions in life, the brain is filled with countless questions every day.

There are more and more gray hairs on the head, and the vicissitudes that have long been unable to hide are boldly presented in the corners of the eyes, and there are more turbid bloodshots in the once bright little eyes. I can't believe that the simple, cute and even little girl-like I was a child has disappeared. I can't believe that my life has changed so much, and I am giving up money while constantly bending my waist for five buckets of rice. And all this became so intense after this pale trace came out, tormenting the night's sleep and the euphemistic wind of the night. Sometimes I stand by the window and want to say sorry to the night breeze, although you are with me who can't sleep, although there are some occasional phone calls in the middle of the night, I don't care about anything, the heart is as empty as a prairie and I don't even know what I'm swimming, maybe I just need such a kind of time when there is nothing, quietly let the body return to the original me.

The bruise on my hand slowly disappeared, the knuckles were no longer so bruised, and the pale color was gradually returning to its original color, but the circle marks were deeply imprinted on the index finger, I don't know if it would disappear that day, and whether I would put the ring on again, I don't know. The only thing I know is that today's ring is still lying quietly on the head of the bed, and it looks dull without human spirit.