In more than a dozen battles along the way, he did not retreat once, taking the lead and taking the lead in the soldiers.

Along the way, he will grow up, and the soldiers who accompany him all the way, the people will see that he studied under Luo Yueli, not the person who is jealous of the virtuous and capable, besides, it is already a good bamboo shoot for the emperor to have a son like Li Qi, and it is impossible to have a second one. ”

Yan Yunzhou's metaphor really made Ning Qi laugh, good bamboo shoots, it is really an image, an emperor as eloquent as the first emperor, can have a son like Li Qi, isn't it a good bamboo shoot?

He didn't expect Yan Yunzhou to think so thoroughly, and after a while, he breathed a sigh of relief and said:

"Your Highness will be a qualified king in this world, even if you pay some price now, you deserve it."

Ning Ji didn't know if he was talking to Yan Yunzhou or himself, Yan Yunzhou put his hand around his shoulders and stared at his eyes:

"Yu'an, don't hide it from me, fear, panic, nightmares are not because you are timid, it is normal to not adapt, you have to tell me if you have any feelings? I'll always be with you. ”

Chapter 97: PTSD (Tight Embrace)

Yan Yunzhou's body carried an inexplicable reassuring feeling, Ning Yi rubbed his face with both hands, and the calmness that he had been holding out slowly finally dissipated, revealing his weakest and most fragile side.

He spoke slowly:

"After that day, I often had nightmares, sometimes dreaming of the bones that had been blown up under Youzhou City, and sometimes I could dream that many people were looking at me with bloody eyes, and they kept looking at me like that.

There are other times when I can dream that people who are already dead suddenly stand up, like a zombie movie on TV, isn't it ridiculous? ”

When he said this, he was a little self-deprecating, Yan Yunzhou didn't know what the zombie movie on the TV meant, but he probably understood what he was talking about literally.

Yan Yunzhou hugged the person in his arms, and suddenly shook it like he was holding a little doll when he was a child, Ning was a little shaky, and raised his head to look at him:

"Can you be serious?"

He was talking about such a serious matter, Yan Yunzhou turned his head, quickly kissed him on the forehead, and then said with a straight face:

"What's wrong with me? Tell me about my first time on the battlefield and how I felt after killing someone. ”

Ning blame did not stop it, after all, it is good to have some "experience" to refer to:

"I told you before I first went to the battlefield, when I went up, I was majestic, and after I went up, I was almost frightened, and I finally managed to survive until the end of that battle, and when I came down, my legs were trembling."

When Yan Yunzhou said this, Ning Ji suddenly couldn't help laughing:

"Can you still scare your legs? What about bluffing me? ”

Yan Yunzhou hugged him and chuckled and said:

"What are you doing to bluff you, who was born to fight and dare to kill? When I came down, I was still strong, afraid that my father would laugh at me, because I shouted the happiest before going to the battlefield, and I endured the weakness of my legs so I didn't kneel down directly.

I still remember that feeling, my legs were weak, my body was in a cold sweat, my hands were trembling, I almost couldn't hold the sword, and all that flashed in front of me were the swords that almost fell on me just now, and the unlucky guy who was cut off by my father. ”

Yan Yunzhou looked at the person in his arms:

"Sleepy or not? Lie down, lie down and I'll tell you about it. ”

Ning Yi smiled a little bitterly:

"I said, big brother, I can sleep if you tell me this story?"

But having said that, he still lay down like a stream, the horse was too upside down, Yan Yunzhou also lay down with him, and raised his hand to cover Ning Yi with the quilt and patted it.

"When I got back to the camp, I didn't dare to sleep alone, and I was too embarrassed to tell my dad that I was shivering alone under the covers."

Ning Qi suddenly laughed when he heard this, he really couldn't imagine Yan Yunzhou hiding in the quilt and shivering.

"And then? Someone to sleep with you? ”

Yan Yunzhou's face was a little nostalgic and a little funny:

"At night, my brother came to my room to accompany me, but he was not as considerate as me to accompany you, he was lying on the bed and sleeping with me, while teasing me, I was not so afraid of the extra person in the house.

My brother was hard-mouthed and soft-hearted, and although he said so, he still came to accompany me every night, and threw me into the old barracks during the day.

There are people who have fought all their lives, listening to them talk about the previous battles, most of the veterans at that time were people who had fought with the emperor for many years, and there were many people who had just been on the battlefield who would be afraid and fearful.

There were a lot of people who were in a serious situation, and then they came up with a solution, which was to put these recruits and veterans together, and listen to the veterans talk about the things they had encountered on the battlefield in the past, and when there were many people, they would talk, and slowly these conditions would improve, so I stayed in the veteran barracks for a month. ”

Ning Yi tilted his head sideways and listened to his words, in fact, he knew that his current situation should be PTSD, that is, post-traumatic psychological disorder, which many soldiers of country M who came down from the battlefield suffered from in modern times.

So in fact, soldiers who have just seen the bloody and cruel battlefield in this era also have this kind of post-traumatic disorder, but this era still doesn't understand what it is.

He didn't come from a psychology background, and he only learned a little about it when he was in school.

"So you're fighting poison with poison? You wouldn't want to send me to the veteran barracks, would you? ”

In Ning's perception of the lack of PTSD, he has heard of a therapy called exposure therapy, which in easy-to-understand terms, is to make people repeatedly state the process of trauma, fight poison with poison, and may not be traumatic when they talk about it?

For a doctor like Ning Yao, he expressed deep doubts that this method might be useful, but it would definitely not work for everyone, such as him, he felt that it would not work.

Yan Yunzhou laughed at him as if he was coaxing a child:

"How can I give up? Besides, I'm a veteran, so I don't have to go to the veteran barracks. ”

Ning Ji looked at him, his eyes were a little curious and a little suspicious:

"You're really good to be in the veteran barracks for a month? Listening to them tell stories from the battlefield is so useful? ”

Why doesn't he feel that way?

Yan Yunzhou laughed as if he remembered something:

"Not really, in the first few days, the more I listened to them, the more scared I became, and every time I was caught by my brother, but a few days later, a new recruit came, and when I went to the battlefield, I was scared to pee my pants.

He cried all day long, wiped his tears and said that he was not afraid, every day with a walnut eye, and finally my father had to let people send him home, but he didn't leave, so he cried in front of me all day long, the contrast was too obvious, after he cried by my side for a week, I suddenly felt that going to the battlefield was better than seeing him cry every day. ”

Ning Yi was stunned by what Yan Yunzhou said, it turned out that he didn't rely on fighting poison with poison but by comparison?

Looking at Yan Yunzhou, he imagined that the little boy who was only 15 years old at the time, shouting to go to the battlefield, was scared and scared, shivering in the quilt, being carried to the veteran camp by his brother, and couldn't bear the little crying bag and defeated himself, he suddenly couldn't help laughing, Yan Yunzhou looked down at him:

"What are you laughing at?"

Ning Yi lay on his side, and the emotions that he had endured and suppressed in the past few days relaxed a lot between speaking:

"Laugh at you, do you know how big you were when I first met you? In the face of the assassination outside, you stood still, and a room full of people knelt down to let you take shelter, what did you say? You say, "You have so little faith in your people? Do you still need this king to take refuge? ””

Ning Qi learned Yan Yunzhou's previous tone decently, causing the man next to him to chuckle, he raised his hand and lightly touched Ning Qi's eyebrows, his voice was a little hurried:

"Do you remember that clearly?"

"It's hard for me to remember such a thrilling scene."

Ning Qi was speechless, he had only been here for a few days at that time, and he had just arrived at the palace to become the unlucky guy who made Prince Yan happy, and he encountered such a bloody picture, could he not remember? But then he laughed:

"It's really unseemly, you were really decent at that time, it's like that outside, you didn't get up from the couch in a daze, I really thought you were a natural cold-faced god of war, but as a result, someone was not scared to shiver in the quilt when he was 15 years old."

Director Ning's mouth was always not to be outdone, and Yan Yunzhou smiled angrily:

"You said it, I was only 15 years old at the time, you are more than 15, right? Still laughing at me? ”

"Can we be the same? Who are you? You are the second son of Prince Yan, who has guarded the northern army for generations, and you have been practicing martial arts since you were a child, and it is your mission to guard the northern border and defend against foreign enemies, who am I? I am a person who grew up peacefully, I studied medicine, healing the sick and saving people, saving lives is my mission, can we compare? ”

Ning Zhi hugged the quilt and gave him a blank look, Yan Yunzhou immediately nodded, and deeply agreed:

"Reasonable, reasonable, this is reasonable, Dr. Ning is shouldering the heavy responsibility of saving the common people, how can I compare with you? We don't compare, our Director Ning is really powerful, I saw the letter from Liang Yi, although I didn't see the scene that day, but I can imagine from his description, even many veterans of archery have numb scalps, you can still calmly order at that time, you don't know how shocked and distressed I was when I saw the letter. ”

No one knows the bloodshed and cruelty of the battlefield better than Yan Yunzhou, and no one can better understand how that scene will shock and hurt Ning Yao, it is precisely because he knows it that he has to feel so sorry for Ning Yao.

Ning Ji was a little speechless, if what he did could not be understood, he could still support himself, just like when he was in Youzhou in those days, during the day he pretended to be nothing, what should he do or what to do, no one knows how afraid he is of getting dark, how afraid of being alone in the room.

But now that he has such a person who understands himself, he suddenly felt that there was nothing to support, so he pulled Yan Yunzhou's sleeve:

"I'm sleepy, I'll sleep first, don't go."

Yan Yunzhou naturally didn't say anything, raised his hand to help him cover the quilt, and was about to turn around to blow the lamp, but just as he was about to get up, he was pulled by Ning Ji again:

"Don't blow it, keep it on."

"Okay, it's on."

Ning Qi was really tired, the mental torture of the past few days, coupled with the tossing of these two days, he fell asleep after holding Yan Yunzhou's sleeve in his hand, this was the fastest time he fell asleep in so many days.

Yan Yunzhou also lay down gently, facing the people inside.

On the bloody battlefield, the smell of corpses wafted in, and Ning Yi walked alone among the stumps and broken arms, and even the feeling of stepping on the blown up arm could be clearly felt, and the whole land was dyed red.

Slowly, the color of the land in front of him began to change, the red gradually faded, replaced by the dissection building that he frequented when he was in school, he entered through the gate, and there seemed to be a fog floating inside the dissection building, and a familiar voice seemed to call him in front of him.

"Ning Jiu, Ning Jiu?"

"Teacher Wang?"

The voice was very familiar, it was his mentor when he was a graduate student, Professor Wang Yan, he began to walk in step by step, but suddenly in front of him was no longer the anatomy building, but a huge morgue, and the freezer drawers where the corpses were parked were all pulled open from the inside.

The ruined corpses were scattered in front of his eyes, and suddenly a gentle but somewhat stiff voice came from behind him:

"Ning Jiu?"

Ning Ji turned around in an instant, and the person standing in front of the door of the morgue at this moment was wearing a white coat, looking at Wang Yan, who was over half a hundred years old, it was his teacher Wang Yan, Ning Ji subconsciously walked in:

"Teacher? How are you in..."

Before he could ask his words, a strange smile appeared on the face of "Wang Yan", he thought that he stretched out his hand, but in the next second, this arm suddenly fell from the shoulder of "Wang Yan", and there was a pool of blood on the ground, and the fallen arm even squirmed on the ground to catch him... When he looked up, the face of "Wang Yan" suddenly changed to the face of another person, the person who was hit in the heart by him and died in his hands.

"Ahh

Ning Qi woke up with a scream, and Yan Yunzhou also woke up instantly:

"Yu'an, Yu'an? It's okay, it's okay, don't be afraid, don't be afraid, it's a dream, it's a dream. ”

Yan Yunzhou wanted to hold Ning Qi's shoulder, but Ning Qi's arm was knocked out like a conditioned reflex, Yan Yunzhou didn't make any more moves to stimulate him, just spoke in a slow voice:

"Yu'an? Wake up, it's a dream, it's okay. ”

Ning Yao's forehead was covered with sweat, his long hair was sticking to his cheeks, and the bedclothes on his body had been soaked with cold sweat, his appearance was indescribably embarrassed, he gasped heavily, and the whole person was like a frightened bird, he quickly looked around.

The battlefield is gone, the dissecting building is gone, the morgue, Teacher Wang is gone, only the room under the candlelight, the pale gray curtains, and the people around him who are full of worry but have a soothing look.

Ning Yao's shoulder collapsed as if he had lost his strength, and Yan Yunzhou stretched out his hand slightly, but in the next second, a wet person threw himself into his arms.

Ning blamed all the fragility at this moment, he hugged the person in front of him tightly, and his voice was so rapid that he even choked:

"I dreamed of the graduate teacher, he was blaming me, he was blaming me, his hands were falling off and he was coming to catch me."

Ning Qi seemed to be awake, but he didn't seem to be fully awake, and part of his emotions were still trapped in Fang Cai's all-too-real dream, Yan Yunzhou soothed his back:

"No, your teacher won't blame you, he will be proud to have a student like you, if I am your teacher, I don't know how proud I should be, Yu'an, don't blame yourself for being good? You didn't do anything wrong, you didn't do anything wrong. ”