Verse 89: A faint bitterness
"What I did, was it wrong? She said.
The sentence structure is like a question sentence, but it does not have a questioning tone, as if you have an answer.
She spoke to Henry, and the sage did not hide his movements, and he stood behind the girl of Loan, leaning against the tree, silent.
In their opinion, it's wrong. Mira hung her head, and the faint moonlight shone through the dark clouds, giving her white hair a blue outline.
"It was Horno who caused it, I know. β
"I know how much of a threat the witch poses. β
"We should get rid of her, we should get it all done, and even Orno himself felt that this matter was not good from beginning to end. β
"Am I throwing a tantrum?"
"But I just can't get used to the way they talk. β
"Is that justice, teacher? β
"Is that justice?"
"Is that the right thing to do?"
"I don't understand this kind of thing!"
"She's clear, that's clear, she's obviously trying to make everything better. Is it wrong for people to believe that things will get better, and is it a sin to just work hard for everything to be better? Just because it turned out to be such a disaster, should the beauty of the original intention be denied?"
"What good things are there in this world?"
"I'm not naΓ―ve and throwing tantrums. β
"It's exactly the same as before, naΓ―ve and ignorant of the world. β
"I thought that the adventures of the past few years had improved me, but am I still as naΓ―ve and naΓ―ve, just like when I first met you, I wanted to save the begging girl. β
"I can't see the truth behind it, and I can only make superficial conclusions, is that true? β
"But I just think, so. She suddenly clutched her chest as if she was stuck in her throat, and only after a while did she say in a trembling voice: "..... That's right, it's not right. β
"It shouldn't be...... It's like this, why even she herself thinks it's a disaster. It should not be like this between mother and child. Pray for the good with all your might, and work hard to achieve happiness, which should not have such a result. β
"In this world, there are no gods, teacher. β
"I kind of understand why the paladin was angry when she said something about the realm of the gods to Orno. β
"If there is a god, then why would He let this happen. If there is a god, then where is He when people need it, when people are praying desperately. β
"If she wasn't alone, she wouldn't have chosen ......"
"Because of despair, because there is only this last straw left, we can only hold on to it by our own strength. Because we hoped for a better future, everything turned into an unforgivable disaster. And it wasn't until this moment that the name of the god who had never shown up was raised, and she was condemned in the name of the godβ"
"Is this justice?"
"I don't understand......"
β...... When I was a child, before I met you. β
"Someone in the village stole something from Roderick's house. β
"A loaf of bread. β
"That person is not a habitual offender, he is a very kind teenager, a very good person. It's only for the sake of my hungry sister at home that I have to do this kind of thing. β
"Roderick didn't lack that loaf of bread at home, and they often threw away what they couldn't eat. Even if they are dirty, they would rather set fire to them themselves than give alms to the poor. β
"He didn't even steal it in their house. It was only a brief moment when Roderick's servant left that he stole a blackened, disliked loaf of bread from the basket they had intended to throw away. β
But no one listened to him, no one sympathized with him, and no one thought of changing it. β
They cut off his hand and said this was what the thief deserved. β
"And then no one cared about the kindness he once had, even if it was a foreign hunter or mercenary, as long as he saw his dirty hands without palms, he knew that it was a thief, and then beat him severely. β
"Even children who don't know anything about the world, when they see him, rush up to him, punch him, spit on him, throw mud. β
Then the adults will praise them for what they did right, and it is justice to beat the thief. β
"As long as a person has done one wrong thing, this brand will follow him for the rest of his life, and even in the end, he will not even be qualified as a human being. β
"I don't even remember his name anymore because people just call him a thief. β
"He's human!"
"It's a living man!"
"Why can they do this, why can they ......"
"You can take this kind of thing for granted, as justice. β
Mira crouched down, she hugged her knees, and Henry walked to the side, standing in the moonlight, still not saying a word.
"Witches are a big threat, I know. β
"There's a big, big risk involved, and I know that. β
"The tension in my heart, the fear. β
"Am I stupid?"
"Even she thinks it's a disaster, it's a bad thing, it's wrong. I'm still thinking like this here, losing my temper so childishly. β
"Am I meddling?"
"But that's ......"
"It shouldn't be like this between mother and child!!"
"I still remember my mom, the teacher. Mira's voice softened for a moment.
"Even though she was gone when I was very young, I remember her. β
"Life wasn't good for Acasta, especially as a Loan who was seen as a lowly and barbaric. β
"We do twice or even triple as much work as everyone else, and we get paid less than half of it. β
"Every winter, it's very difficult. β
"When I was a child, I used to get sick because I didn't have enough nutrition and I always had all kinds of problems. When it comes to winter, it is easy to have a fever and cough. β
"My parents' work is already stretched thin, and they have to raise a small child, so they can't go to work if they want to accompany me, and they can't accompany me if they want to work. And I get sick every winter, and the amount of money it takes to get a doctor makes them even more stressed. β
"But my mother never complained in front of me once. β
She was smiling until the end. β
"Ya Sakuroisia. β
"That's what she called me. Mira looked up at Henry, tears welling up in the corners of her eyes.
"My treasure. β
"I'm just a drag, but she's never hated me. β
"I've caused them so much trouble, so much pain, and if I hadn't been there, maybe they wouldn't even be alive now. β
But she never complained. β
"You are my treasure, my mother always said that no matter how difficult life is, I will not lose my way with you. β
"And with you, I'll always come back to this home. β
"Even if it's damp, dark and cramped. β
"Mom, this liar. She buried her face in her arms.
"Orno too. β
"It has to be like this. β
"That's her child. β
"No matter what, the last happiness she wants to grasp, forcing her to do this kind of thing, is true. β
"She's in enough pain. β
"Both of them are in pain!" Mira suddenly screamed, and a small sound sounded in the bushes behind her, and Heng glanced out of the corner of his eye, but did not speak, still quietly by her side.
"I can't pretend I know the slightest bit of stress and pain from Orno, and I can't understand how desperate it must be to go through so many good hopes for such a result. β
"But it's not right, they're not right, and neither is Orno himself!"
"No matter how things turn out, she shouldn't deny how good she once was!"
"She shouldn't deny her love and happiness. β
"She shouldn't even deny the existence of her daughter. β
"She still loves her!" said Mira, but the first of the words she didn't seem to be referring to.
"She's not. β
"Not as everyone rejects. β
"I can understand it, because I was in my mother's place the day she never came back. β
"How many times have I guarded the door and refused to fall asleep or eat, worried that I wouldn't be able to open the door in time when they came back, and worried that I didn't hear my mother crying again, 'My Mira, my darling,' because I was busy with something else. β
"How many nights have I cried until I fell asleep, and then I was awakened by the cold, only to find that the house was dark and empty, and no one was there. β
"She's not pure evil. β
"She's not. β
"There's something good in there. β
"The crystallization of pure love and hope cannot be like this, it cannot be what they say it is. β
"She's clear. Mira said, "I'm crying." β
"Alone. β
"Alone, crying alone. β
"This shouldn't be the case. β
"The relationship between mother and child should not be like this. β
"Don't deny it. β
"Don't deny it. β
"If you yourself think that there is no longer anything good to look forward to......."
"Don't give up on your children......"
"Don't leave her alone. β
She hung her head, her shoulders twitching slightly, and finally she didn't say anything more.
The silence lasted about two minutes or so.
There was no sound of insects, no sound of the wind, except for the silent shining of the lost brightness of the Sifunk, which was obscured by the dark clouds, and everything was as silent as the Dead Sea.
β...... Won't you say something, teacher? Mira said with her head still buried in her muffled voice through her arm.
"I want to say it. Henry sat down beside her: "Didn't you already say it?" β
He reached out and rubbed the other man's gray hair.
"You're not wrong. β
"Stick to your heart. β
"It's a good thing to be free-hearted, not to be influenced by the opinions of others, to always be self-conscious. β
"......" Mira was silent for a moment, and Henry raised an eyebrow, "What's wrong?" he asked.
β...... Horno, too, said something similar. She said, and then suddenly took a deep breath, though still with her head in her head.
"Whew-"
"I'll be alone for a while, and then I'll go back to camp. Mira said, and Henry gave a soft "um" and stood up.
He walked slowly towards the orange glow, his boots clattering on the dead leaves, and then the sage stopped as he passed by a bush.
The ...... elf glanced at him, but neither said a word, and Henry continued towards the camp.
There was silence, and only the elves themselves stood in the darkness.
"I'm crying...... ? She said in a voice that only she could hear, her eyes fixed on a sunflower that had withered and blackened in the moonlight.
The wind is blowing.
It's still rocking gently.
As if he had never died.