The best way to deal with those sad past things is not to think about it, the past has passed, it is useless to think too much, this is a method, a very good method, as long as you can master it, you can come out of the shadows, how can you not think about it, this is a problem, it is difficult to solve the problem, in this case, you still need not to think about it, the beauty of words is that you can say it no matter what, and it is rarely the same time to say and do, this is the most basic.

After the brothers retreated, Master told me that this trip would have a great impact on my life, so he asked me to make good use of this opportunity. After bidding farewell to Master, Uncle, and all the senior brothers, I finally embarked on a journey of travel, and there was always a faint feeling of relief in my heart. The road down the mountain is still the same as before, the same mountain and the same water, the same road with no end in sight, but the most rugged road has been smoothed out a lot by the donor's money, which makes the reputation of the donor greatly improved in the hearts of the pilgrims, the master said that he will naturally receive good retribution if he does good deeds, and I always think that he knows the good retribution so he will do good deeds.

These thoughts just stayed in my heart, and I couldn't bear to make the faces of my uncles happy, and I wanted to teach me to be careful of falling into demons. I asked Master why we still want to become Buddhas and why we refuse to become demons since all beings are equal? Master said that one day I will understand, and this will allow me to slowly become enlightened.

There is no difference between the days of wandering and being in the temple, except that you have to make your own fate, and the place where you miss to live is sleeping in the mountains, and other things such as chanting scriptures and meditating are the same. I once stayed overnight in a mountain temple in the second month of my wandering. For us monks, it was the same to live there and who to live with, and I never felt that there was anything wrong with it, but the only thing I was embarrassed about was not knowing if the original residents minded my interruption.

When I saw the temple that day, it was just dark, and I thanked the Buddha for leaving a temple in this uninhabited place to shelter me from the wind and rain. This temple is not very big, in the middle of the temple is a statue of a mountain god, although it is already a little dilapidated, but you can still vaguely see the appearance of the green fangs, so many times I feel that Taoism is not as good as our Buddhism, the statue is a good proof. The top of the temple has collapsed a few times, and through the gaps, you can clearly see the stars in the sky.

I bowed to the mountain god, and then a fire was lit in the middle of the temple, and it was a great benefit to make a fire, in addition to lighting to drive away the cold, the most important thing was to scare away wild beasts, which was very necessary, although I saw that they were equal, but I don't know if they would see that my stinky skin would increase their appetite, and this alone seemed to be far from the Buddha.

My brother and I sat on the chairs and raised our teacups at the same time, smiled at each other, and tasted slowly, while the Buddha smiled quietly behind him. The senior brother asked me how my master was doing lately, how the uncles were. I answered them all, and when I asked why I came out, I didn't know what to say.

I don't know why I came out, and I forgot the reason that Master explained. Now I even began to wonder if I should come out, I felt that what I could bear was completely different from what I had thought before, I didn't know if I was not suitable to be a monk, and I had the idea of not returning to the temple in many inadvertent ways.

My heart is gradually entering the devil's path, and what is even more terrifying is that I am slowly enjoying this feeling. The senior brother told me a lot of things after he left the temple, it was a rich experience, but also a psychological process, and it was still very difficult from the self-deprecating face of the senior brother.

The senior brother said that he was very confused when he came out, he didn't know what he should do, and he didn't know what he could do, he had been a cook, although he only cooked vegetarian dishes, but he really couldn't get used to seeing the scene of living beings being killed, and he warned himself that he was already in the world, and he should follow the rules of the world. Senior brother sat opposite me in a daze, senior brother is the same as me in the past half a year, we are wandering between monks and ordinary people, and our hearts have begun to become erratic under the two impacts.

Even though I know that I am a monk and that a monk is still a mortal, I still can't avoid a sadness that is mixed between the two, a test, a test that we give ourselves. The senior brother made me a pot of tea, poured a large cup of it, and the fragrance of tea gradually spread all over the house, this is the taste of the heart, the familiar fragrance.

My brother asked how it tasted, and I smiled and didn't know what to say. The senior brother also smiled and said that there is such a thing as tea, or he doesn't know how to live in this world, there are many kinds of tea, and there are many kinds of tea fragrances, each of which is a unique taste, and tea is not guilty, but his heart is shackled. I looked at my brother stupidly, trying to get the thoughts back into my mind, but the thoughts of my life immediately dissipated in the endless blank, and the blank continued. My brother didn't tell me why he left the temple, and I didn't ask.

The senior brother said that he couldn't remember who he was a lot of the time, he was and still is, and he was always looking, he didn't know if he was looking in the right direction, just like he felt that he was not suitable to be a monk. In any case, he will use his limited life to try to find his true self. Senior brother is more suitable to be a monk than me, I have a true self, although it is only the true self in my own eyes, many times I dare not admit it, no one can know the answer without facing a problem, we can't, the Buddha can't do it, but we are always us, the Buddha is always the Buddha.

I talked to my brother all night, and my heart regained consciousness, and suddenly an idea came to me. I am reminded of Master's story about the teacup: a teacup can only hold tea if it is empty. I understand what Master is saying, but I don't understand what kind of tea should be in the teacup to be the best? Maybe only an empty teacup can get rid of all troubles, and simple always derives the most genuine.

The next day, my brother saw me off, and there was nothing but a smile, a Buddha name, and the most genuine looks. Many things don't need to be said, but many people need to be expressed. This is the scene I have seen the most in my travels, too much life and death, too much reluctance, which makes me wonder, is all their friendship only reflected at that moment, maybe we have been far away from the end.

My brother gave me a letter for me to give to Master, saying that he had gone too far from being a monk, but there were thousands of paths in life, and as long as he could really follow his heart, he would definitely reach the state he should have. I nodded, and although I didn't fully understand it, I felt a lot more comfortable. I started to return to the temple after leaving my brother, and what I saw and heard in the past six months made me confused and helpless many times, especially after seeing my brother, I suddenly felt that I was no longer myself: my mind was empty, and my heart could not be calm for a moment. I didn't know what I was thinking, I didn't know why I was going back to the temple, I just instinctively walked in the direction of the temple, and I felt that it was the beginning, and it should end there.

Under the leadership of my uncles and uncles, I have seen a lot of this kind of scene in half a year, and I don't have any special feelings, but the thoughts in my heart are gradually deposited. The uncles and uncles were full of joy, just like seeing the Buddha descend to earth, and all the brothers were also very happy, but there were many different things in their eyes. I remembered the Buddha statues in the main hall, and suddenly I felt that they were the best.

They welcomed me for two reasons, one was that I could come back, and the other was that Master had given a prophecy that I would be the presiding officer of the monastery. I haven't seen Master for half a year, and he has aged a lot in half a year, but his eyes are still so clear, and there are still different things, but this time it is completely different from the previous ones. After asking me a few questions, my uncles went to prepare for tomorrow's handover ceremony.

"I can't be the host, I want to be vulgar," he said, then stood up and walked outside the main hall. The uncles and uncles were stunned there, their faces were full of confusion, and the brothers and sisters looked at me in surprise, and the people outside probably thought that this excitement was too big, so they stayed there, not knowing what to do, only the master himself, and the puzzled eyes instantly cleared up. I took a deep breath and walked out the door, maybe it happened too suddenly, everyone stood there stunned, no one stopped me, they all looked at me mechanically and helplessly. The sunlight outside the hall was already very dazzling, and the breeze came out, still so fresh and soft.

This incident caused an unprecedented sensation, and my name and the name of the monastery were spread far and wide, from the literati to the ordinary people, and everyone talked about it all the time, but it was filled in with many things that were not there, and even treated him as a book, but the content was no longer beyond the control of the facts. I understand that the rest of my life is cultivation.

After I returned to the world like a senior brother, I opened a teahouse and lived a comfortable life every day. Master once sent me a letter and said, "I finally know what I didn't foresee, and it has solved my doubts, you are a good boy, I don't know if your choice is right····· There is no right or wrong in life, people will not succeed, how can they become Buddhas. Just obey your heart!

It wasn't until the master's death that I went back to the monastery once, and everyone didn't care about the mundane things anymore, so the uncles and uncles politely led me to the incense hall and asked me a lot about the mundane things, and then the cremation of the master's body, at the moment when the fire was lit, my heart was completely empty. I have had many dreams, the most common is that Master has turned into a golden Arhat and walked in front of me, and I would smell a familiar faint fragrance like a dog's tail grass, and every time Master always turned around and smiled at me, saying, "Where did you come from, where are you going, you will meet again when you are fated"·····