Yue Xiaomeng held her chin in her hands and looked at the gloomy sky outside the window, Brother Lan En rarely talked about his past, she finally cheered up, it was strange to say, as long as she didn't talk about the covenant, her sleepiness would be gone. ()

The light blue curtains were tied on both sides, the wind chimes in front of the window swayed with the wind, jingling, jingling, jingling, crisp and pleasant wind chimes echoed in the church, it was their birthday gift to Brother Lanen, Yue Xiaomeng gave a string of shell wind chimes, which she spent half a month with her father in the coastal area to pick up piece by piece of small shells to make, although it is not as good as the one sold in the store, but when Brother Lanen hung up the wind chimes, the breeze blows, its light dancing posture, crisp and pleasant notes are the best response.

"Children, I have dedicated my life to the Old Gods Cult, preaching and preaching, even if I am just a grain of sand in the world, I hope to turn into a candle in the darkness and help the world to guide the way forward, but in the end, I am just a sinner, when a man betrays the king, and his sins are unforgivable, can he ask the king for forgiveness as a prisoner? He did not dare, and could not, the king would rebuke him and punish him, unless he could make amends for the wrongs he had committed and regain the king's trust, but ...... Do you think that's possible?"

Father Lan turned his back, his deep blue eyes were sad and guilty, he looked at the stone sculpture of the god in the church, the huge stone hollow ring was three meters high, and inside the ring stood a man, dressed in ragged robes, holding a book in his right hand to symbolize wisdom, and holding a candle in his left hand to symbolize courage, and his hands were open as if embracing all beings.

Yue Xiaomeng turned her head to look at Father Lan En in confusion, she had no way to understand the meaning of Lan En's words, but she noticed that Lan En's right hand under the sleeve robe was trembling slightly, and there were usually other clergy in the church, Deacon Bran, who was silent, Sister Teresa who taught them to sing, and Priest Ashu who was in charge of cooking......

It was only then that she noticed that all the clergy in the church were missing today, except for Father Lanen.

Jingle bells, jingle bells......

The wind chimes swayed with the wind, Yue Xiaomeng unconsciously shrunk her shoulders, and the wind outside the window seemed to be a little cold......

"Teacher Lan, you ...... Why are you crying?"

The blonde girl sitting behind Yue Xiaomeng obviously noticed that something was wrong with Lan En, her voice was as crisp as a wind chime, but Lan En's shoulders shrugged even more, his voice stopped abruptly, his body shook and held the handle of the wooden chair on the right side, and slowly squatted down, and the muddy tears slipped down his cheeks one after another.

"Don't ...... Don't call me a teacher anymore, I don't deserve those two words, and I don't deserve to be a priest...... I am just a sinner, a demon with unforgivable sins, and I am not worthy to serve God, not to teach you, and not worthy to ...... Live......" Lan En paused for a long time with every half of his words, still trying to control his emotions.

At this moment, all the children noticed that something was wrong with Le En, this group of children ran to Father Lan En's side, hurriedly trying to comfort Father Lan En, but they didn't know what to say or do, they used to cry, Father Lan En and the nuns came to comfort, but at this moment the identity was reversed, they were at a loss, Yue Xiaomeng tilted her little head and thought for a while, climbed onto the table, tried to stand on her toes, and took off the shell wind chime.

She pursed her lips and jumped off the table, trotting all the way to Father Lane, crouching down and holding up the wind chimes and blowing softly.

Jingle bells, jingle bells......

Father Lan raised his head in astonishment, looking at the gently swaying wind chimes in front of him, looking at the group of children who were at a loss and even began to cry with him, and in a trance, he heard the guidance of God.

"Not a demon. ”

After all, he is young and his emotions are particularly susceptible, many children began to cry, and the inexplicable sadness gradually infected everyone's mood, but Yue Xiaomeng pursed her lips and said this to Lan En.

...... Yes, I'm a sinner, but I can't be a demon.

Maybe he was touched by Yue Xiaomeng's words, maybe he couldn't bear the guilt and guilt in his heart, Lan En woke up like a dream, his scattered eyes regrouped together, he exhaled deeply, touched Yue Xiaomeng's head and said, "Xiaomeng, thank you, today you are my teacher, do you still wear the necklace you gave to you yesterday?" return it to me immediately, and then leave through the back door of the church, and remember when you go back, no matter who asks, they will say that they don't know me, they don't know the Old God Cult, and they will ...... tomorrow Don't come again, may God bless you. ”

The children didn't know what was going on, and they didn't advocate it, so they could only do as Lan En said, and took off the silver ring chain around their necks and returned it to Lan En, and then walked towards the back door of the church one after another at Lan En's urging, and after a while, only Yue Xiaomeng was still standing next to Father Lan En

"Xiaomeng, what's wrong with you?" Father Lan looked at Yue Xiaomeng gently.

"I gave the necklace to my father...... I'm sorry......" Yue Xiaomeng whispered.

"Didn't you wear it? It's okay, they shouldn't be so soon, when you get home, let your dad throw the necklace away, throw it into the sea, don't be seen, go back, from tomorrow, don't come to church again, let's go." Father Len urged.

"Why?" Yue Xiaomeng's eyes were full of doubts.

"...... there are people in this world who live for love, some people live for faith, some people live for hatred, and some people live for power, when we pick up the candle flame to illuminate others, we can't resist the sword, but when we put down the candle flame and pick up the sword to resist, they will accuse us of being selfish and cruel, I don't understand why the gods give the world limited power at the same time, but also give the world unlimited things, we are in the seven hells, how can we go to heaven, alas, you go back quickly, they are coming。 ”

Before the words fell, there was a whistling sound of breaking wind from the church, Lan En's dark blue eyes reflected a fire like a torrential rain, he picked up Yue Xiaomeng, and protected her in his arms, before turning around, sharp arrows ran out from his shoulders, Lan En didn't care about the pain, and directly pressed Yue Xiaomeng to the ground, and the next moment, his chest, stomach, neck, and arms were all pierced by sharp arrows, and the whole person was like a hedgehog, and blood gushed out, dousing the arrows that were still burning around him.

Father Lan's dark blue eyes gradually began to fade, Yue Xiaomeng asked him why, but he really didn't know, he insisted on his faith all his life, although he did not do good every day, but he also preached and preached to help many people out of the predicament, over the years of being a priest, he would take time out of the confessional room every day to listen to the world's complaints, or life was unsatisfactory, or emotional frustration, or to God to pray for forgiveness.

After being a listener all his life, he became even more confused, once a prostitute came to the church to confess, she told her helplessness, hoping that God could guide her out of the predicament, hoping that Lan En could take her in, but Lan En refused, he saw too many people of this kind, always hoped for unearned help, hoped that others would help without reservation, and would only pray for their mercy, so he continued to recite allusions and covenant verses backwards.

Three days later, the prostitute died, she was beaten to death, it is said that on that day, she had escaped from the church, and had been taken back not long after leaving the church, and the beaten flesh was blurred, and there was no human figure, who could understand the despair of being rejected by Rann that night? Who could understand the pain of being dragged back and beaten with an iron whip? She died, very easily, like a dead leaf drifting in the wind, and no one cared, no one even remembered her name.

On that day, Lan En's firm faith was affected by an indescribable impact, and she couldn't sleep for several days and nights, as soon as she closed her eyes, her voice and face would appear in her mind, and she hid her face and cried.

This series of questions about himself eventually evolved into questions about his own beliefs, and he couldn't help but wonder, does God really exist?

If God really exists, why doesn't He help these people who are in deep suffering, why doesn't He stop the war when it breaks out, why doesn't He come to the rescue when the epidemic spreads?

There was always another voice in Ran's heart telling him, "Don't you realize that in the Old God, there is no Word of God and His teachings at all, and there are only some man-made traditions?"

Maybe...... The gods don't exist at all, the so-called covenants are just books compiled by people, maybe the faith he insists on is a joke at all, Len has never seen heaven, but he feels that he is already in the sevenfold hell.

Whenever he was alone, the voice would come out unconsciously, and he was in great pain, as if he had been struck by lightning, and he told himself, "I was born for the Old God, and I am willing to die for her." ”

Every night he knelt alone in front of the statue of God, praying to the God to stop the sound, but instead, the voice grew louder and louder, and only when he recited the covenant would he find a moment of peace.

Maybe I'm really a sinner, maybe that's God's punishment for myself......

Lan En died, so easily, like a dead leaf withering with the wind, the ring necklace in his hand scattered to the ground, but this time he did not regret it, maybe he was in hell in this life, but in the last second of his life, he was still willing to light the candle flame and dispel the darkness, even if a minute ago, he almost extinguished the candle in his hand with his own hands......

After a rain of arrows, the church was in a mess, the flames spread wantonly, and soon the surrounding wooden tables, chairs and curtains began to burn, billowing smoke, Father Lan En supported the ground with both hands, like the most solid shield in front of her, even if it was pierced by arrows, it did not fall, Yue Xiaomeng lay on the ground in a daze, her whole body was soaked with blood, she stared at the mural on the top of the church in distraction, which was the story of the thirteenth chapter and verse 32 of the covenant.

When the flood was raging, God stood on the bow of the ship and said, "The flood is a calamity of evil, and if a good man is in danger, pray in his heart, and I will come by boat." ”