My name is Du Xiaoyue.

Datang Huichang was born in May of the fifth year, and in June of the thirteenth year of Dazhong, I died. (Note 1)

You may feel sorry for me to die, but for me, it is a relief.

I was a mistake from birth.

My father didn't even think about asking my mother to bear children for him.

I was an accident.

A product of drunken promiscuity.

An illegitimate daughter who is not recognized by her father.

My father was an alcoholic. When he was drunk, people could always hear from him about the glory of his ancestors.

During the reign of Taizu (Note 2), Du Ruhui in the "Fang Mou Du Dudu" was the prime minister of Zuo, the secretary of the military department, and Cai Guogong during his lifetime, and he was a very popular minister;

But what does this have to do with him, a rotten drunkard!

At that time, Du Ruhui's second son Du He rebelled, and the Du family was exiled to Lingnan, and the family fell into the middle of the road.

After more than a hundred years, the prosperity of the past has passed, and the Du family now only has three or two kittens and puppies.

It's a pity that the man, obviously the family has decayed, but he is still playing the score, after appointing himself prime minister, his status is noble, and he must marry the daughter of the princess and nobleman as his wife.

finally relied on countless relationships to marry a young lady who was a petty official in the capital, but she was a fierce and fierce jealous woman.

Joy and joy in the door, the next day the next day regret the green intestines. The man was cleaned up and obedient, and spent the whole day drinking to kill his sorrows, and he no longer had the arrogance he had before.

That man, what a pathetic!

But there is also a benefit, the official lady's Jingguan father helped him dredge up and down, took off the hat after rebellion, and also made up for the lack of a general judgment in a small place in Liaodong.

And my mother was one of the bride-in-waiting maids of the official lady. Because of her mediocre appearance, the official lady who had become the aunt of Du Mansion didn't care, and immediately sent her to wait for the man.

But the eldest lady forgot that drunken sex is not beautiful or ugly.

That time, my mother became pregnant.

The eldest lady was naturally furious and insisted on feeding my mother abortion pills. And that cowardly man didn't even dare to say a word, and acquiesced in the eldest mother's killing of his flesh and blood.

Thankfully, my grandmother interceded and saved my life.

I wasn't grateful to her though, even though she saved me.

That woman just wanted to hold her grandson, so she came forward to protect my mother. Although the eldest mother is not unable to give birth, she has two consecutive children, both of which are women. The woman didn't dare to say anything in her mouth, but she must have felt uncomfortable in her heart.

When I was born, her attitude took a 180-degree turn. Although he doesn't hate our mother and daughter like a mother, he always sneers at us and looks down on us on weekdays.

I'm going to end up being a demon, and the man I should call "Father" the most of them is the woman I should call "Grandmother"!

I don't resent my aunt.

She was also a poor woman.

The saddest thing about being a woman is nothing more than that her husband is unfaithful and she has no queen. And she, both of them.

So, I pity her.

Comparatively speaking, although the eldest lady makes no secret of her hostility towards us, she is also reasonable. When she knew that she couldn't erase my existence, she chose not to be out of sight and out of mind, when our mother and daughter didn't exist. They will also pay us a little money on time every month to maintain our daily life. Although those cases of money have been deducted by the subordinates.

In fact, she is still a good person.

I don't resent my cowardly mother. She is just a weak woman, a slave maid, and she doesn't even have the identity of a good family, how can she fight against this ugly world?

My mother is a cowardly and kind woman to the core.

She is powerless to fight the tragedy that fate has imposed on her, and she is powerless to change the malice that the world has towards her.

So that night, she didn't push him away. That night, she had me.

But I can't forgive that man.

All men in the world are lucky, and he is the worst of them.

He gave birth to me, but he didn't want me. I have lived in the eyes of everyone for more than ten years, but it was on the day I got married that I met him for the first time. Of course, that's another story.

Perhaps it was a curse that the man never gave birth to a son. After the eldest mother gave birth to three daughters, she couldn't resist the grandmother who wanted to hold her grandson, so she had to agree to the man's concubine. But the two-room concubine that the man accepted later was even more outrageous, and his stomach has not moved since he entered the door.

He slowly began to age, but faced the embarrassment of having no children to send him away. Grandmother is even more anxious, but this kind of thing, she is useless, and she can only "look at the daughter and sigh".

And in this environment, I grew up day by day. Over the years, I've never wanted to run away from this hellish place. But because of my mother, I forcibly endured it.

She was too cowardly and too kind. Moreover, her health is not good. If it weren't for me, she wouldn't have survived a year under the bullying of those subordinates.

I was still fantasizing that when I grew up and had the ability to make money, I would take my mother out and escape from that hellish place.

Unfortunately, the reality is often cruel.

The man borrowed the relationship of his father-in-law to make up for the general judgment of a small place in Liaodong. Although it is the most inferior official position, it can be regarded as an official anyway.

And once a person sets foot on the big dye shop of officialdom, don't think about being a clean person anymore. The desire of officials to climb up the ladder is never-ending.

Clothed beasts, as has been the case since ancient times.

And he, after this pretentious prime minister, is naturally even more so.

In order to climb up, he entrusted my three sisters-in-law to marry his superiors as concubines. Although the eldest lady was crying and making trouble, she still couldn't change the man's desire to climb up, nor could she change the fate of my sisters.

In fact, if it weren't for me and my mother staying at home and deliberately downplaying the influence of our mother and daughter, they would have been forgotten by them. I'm afraid I'm the one who was the first to be abandoned by them.

However, "life" is not something that I can hide if I want to.

Relying on "selling his daughter", the man climbed step by step to the high position of the middle protector under the command of Fan Yang Jiedu, but he was not satisfied. In order to get the opportunity to continue to climb up, he thought about it and finally thought that he still had an illegitimate daughter who was not recognized. And I was unilaterally betrayed by him to a bad old man of seventy or eighty years old as his nineteenth concubine.

This is my father, a well-dressed beast who can't be called "father"!

I resigned myself to my fate.

Anyway, it's just jumping from one hell to another, and there's nothing you can't bear.

But that's not what my mother thinks.

My mother was a cowardly woman who bordered on humility. She has always been submissive, she is obviously the identity of the master, but even those subordinates can bully her at will, steal her things, and deduct her money. And she never complained, and even taught me not to resent those subordinates, they were not easy.

Kindness is too much, that is cowardice.

I never thought she would rebel one day.

But on the day I got married, she was unusual, crying and begging my bastard "father" not to "sell" me.

I wanted to tell her that it didn't matter, that I had resigned myself to my fate. But when I saw her face, I was startled.

His head hit the ground, the blood fell down his forehead, and his already unsightly face looked even more ugly, and his expression was sad, as if his daughter was not married, but sent to death.

I thought I wouldn't cry, but at that moment, I cried.

She is my mother, the mother who gave birth to me and raised me, and depends on each other for her life!

Even if she is humble and cowardly, she is still my mother!

I don't want her to live under the fence like this again!

I left the phoenix crown and xia veil, took off the splendid wedding dress, and threw myself into her arms, wanting to take her out of this cold Du Mansion.

As you can imagine, we failed.

After all, that man is an official, and he pays attention to face. Even if your hands are covered in blood, your face must be clean.

So it was my grandmother who came out to clean up the mess with me.

That woman's methods were simple, but they were no less effective.

My mother was locked up by her, and because I was threatened by that woman with my mother's life, I had to put on the bright red shackles again, and I was carried by everyone to the bed of the bad old man!

Little did I know at the time that my mother had swallowed arsenic under the woman's gaze before I put on the auspicious clothes.

She is a cowardly woman, and the only means of resistance is death.

It's a pity that I've lived with my mother for so many years, but I have never seen through this.

If it weren't for the next accident, maybe I would have known the truth years later, but what strength could I have to fight again?

But the accident happened. I became a demon, but I was also given great power and was able to save my mother.

It's a pity for my mother, she doesn't need my help anymore.

Note 1: Huichang is the year name of Li Yan of Tang Wuzong, and Dazhong is the year name of Li Chen of Tang Xuanzong.

Note 2: Tang Taizu Li Jiancheng, a product of changing history in the biography.