The eyelids were heavy, and I struggled to keep them wide open. Warm blood flowed slowly, something was clear, like the beautiful face of a 19-year-old, and something was gradually blurred, like the fog on the streets of Chengdu every spring......

Shed a tear dear

Just one drop

can be saved

Under a thousand layers of hell

He who died of great suffering

I

......

The Christmas bells rang far away, and the whole city was jubilant. In that dark, cold, damp alley, I lay silently, blood congealed in the dirt, and spring grass was innumerable. Through the increasingly brilliant night sky of Chengdu, I saw the golden God, who was watching the world compassionately in the clouds, and legend has it that he would bless the world tonight.

- "Chengdu, please forget me tonight" Murong Xuecun

For three years, I was always vigilant, like a snake charmer with a malicious heart, in the snake group

He whistled blankly, both infatuated by its dancing beauty and afraid of being stabbed by its fangs. Now I'm going to die

, finally found out that the snake was non-venomous, always gentle, never thought of biting me, only followed me

The whistle dances.

We were originally grasshoppers in a nest, looking for food from grass every day, but now the wind is frosty, and we are destined to fly by wings. This is a dark jungle, with long grass and wolves, and life and death depend on the destiny of heaven.

When people reach middle age, time is short, and death hovers outside the door at any time. According to ancient Eastern legends, this life is insignificant, just a doorway to the afterlife, it is narrow and dirty, and once the lights are extinguished, the deceased raises their hands and knocks at the gates of eternity. I have lived for 37 years, licked the honey, sucked the bitter root, and my heart fell between the guillotines and gradually despaired, and it was not a pity to die a long time ago.

The afterlife is too far away, and I don't have any hope. If that light goes out, may it never light again.

Where are the heroic deeds,

The moon is in the sky, and the millennium shines on the green mound.

The golden palace and jade hall are barren grass,

The red face is like snow, and the rouge follows the water.

Grace in the previous life, hatred in the next life, all paid for the yellow roll and the green lantern,

The green shirt is wet, the mountain is far away, and it is even more embarrassing to have a long pavilion and a short pavilion.

The red dust is a thousand feet away, the life and death of the world,

This time we will never meet......

I'm old and sophisticated, and I know that these things are nothing more than a show, and they should never be taken seriously. After 37 years of ups and downs, I have long been trained to have a heart like pig iron, unmoved by any emotion, and deeply wary of all sweet words. The most poisonous thing in the world is gentleness, beautiful mushrooms always kill people, kind smiles often hide blades, and the true meaning of life lies in ruthlessness, red dust is immortal, but those who die early are always affectionate.

It has also been rampant in the world

The iron horse hissed and the hook was cold, and the mountains were flattened

It was also dusk to the rain

In his life, his family and country are sad, and there are tears

A glass of wine drank the floating name

A roar of the sea is born......

This is my philosophy: never merciful, never forgive, the world has always been ruthless, and the truth is always in the hands of the murderer. If someone respects me, I will pay him back a foot, and whoever plucks me a hair, I will kill his whole family. The majestic history of the five cars, the old immortal sees morality, and the wreckage sees power, and I only read two words: murder. This is the great way, the truth of truth, all deeds, all civilizations, all the ups and downs of all changes. The weak die, the strong eat, the city is the jungle, either kill or be killed, there is never a middle way.

That's my life. There are three kinds of people in this world, the first kind of people love themselves and love others, the second kind of people only love themselves and do not love others, and I belong to the third type: I love neither myself nor others. Sometimes I feel that life is just a trance, I can't grasp anything, I can't leave anything, all kinds of things, just waiting for old age and death. Monk Hailiang gave me a painting with two proverbs:

I want to live in the world, but I have no place at all;

Look at all kinds of red and purple, and turn into gray after the eyes.

That's what it means. I planted the seed, but I never expected the fruit, it was full of honey, or it was hidden in poison, it made no difference to me.

I shook my head, and a black shadow drew closer, and I took a deep breath and raised my head vigorously. Late spring

In May, the flowers are in full bloom, and a young crane rises into the blue sky...... The darkness is boundless, and I am drifting and sinking. The singing of the world is melodious, and the doors are opened one after another. People from afar whisper faintly, yes

People laugh, some people cry, and one voice says: The world is old, and we are so young......

- "Forgive Me for Turning the Red Dust Upside Down" Murong Xuecun