......

I'm an actor.

I've starred in a lot of hit movies and TV series. I will talk about a few works casually, such as "Langya Bang", "Amorous Jiangshan", "Heavenly General Hero", "New Fengshen Bang", "New Romance of the Three Kingdoms", ...... And so on and so forth. You're sure to find my name in the end credits of these blockbuster movies.

Didn't find it?

No way, you look closely. Skip lead star, cameo, starring...... Just halfway through the end song, there is a list called "Participate in the Show", do you see it? Yes, just look carefully in it, there must be the name "Yi Chongtian".

Yi Chongtian is me -- a young but promising film and television star.

What!

How can you talk in the same tone as my future mother-in-law? Let me emphasize again, I am an actor! An actor with dreams, pursuits, future, and discipline!

Do you know what is the difference between the psychological state of Song Bing A and Han Jun B when facing death?

Do you know how the mental outlook of the Ouchi guards and the Dahan Iron Cavalry is different when they are on duty?

Of course you don't know, without more than ten years of hard work, you can't practice perfect acting skills like mine. Let's talk about grassroots actors Huang Bo and Wang Baoqiang, the acting skills of both of them, uh...... I can only say that they have their own strengths and weaknesses, when facing the camera, they may be a little better than me, but if it is against the camera, my acting skills will definitely crush them!

Do you know how highly Gao Xixi, the famous director who directed "Romance of the New Three Kingdoms," spoke highly of me? His original words were: "It vividly expresses people's struggle and despair before death, and portrays a nobody in troubled times." This sentence was copied by me on the title page of the book "Self-cultivation of Actors" under my pillow, and I always encouraged myself.

......

Alright, now you know me. I don't have the time to talk nonsense with you right now, I have to rush to the final negotiations with my future mother-in-law. If this last hurdle is passed, Xiaowan and I will finally have lovers and finally become married, and you will all be envious to death at that time: a dead man can marry such a beautiful wife...... Ha ha!

Xiao Wan opened the door for me when her mood was a little wrong. Sure enough, the future mother-in-law was not moved by the sincerity of my "three visits to the thatched house", and like the previous two times, it was the three-plate axe that split the head and covered the face:

"Not to mention that your tricky job makes a lot of money, and it is not stable at all for three days of fishing and two days of drying nets, do you plan to let my family Xiaowan follow you to drink the northwest wind?"

"I'm not such a snobbish person, I don't require you to have a car and a house, and your parents are dead, but if you want to marry my Xiaowan, you must at least pay a down payment. ”

"Don't tell me that there is a house in my hometown, I am Xiaowan such an only daughter, it is absolutely impossible for her to marry out of Shanghai, you should die!"

For these three axes, I have never come up with a way to crack them. Although my parents said that they would sell the family house for me as a down payment, what can I do?

But I'm here prepared today, and I won't admit it easily. I sat down and said very sincerely: "Auntie, what you said makes sense, and I will do my best to make Xiaowan live a good life, but now there is a special situation......

"What special circumstances?"

Xiao Wan lowered her head and prepared for the storm. I plucked up the courage to unfold my hole cards, "We're going to give birth to ...... baby"

"What!" the mother-in-law exploded when she heard this, and poked a finger at Xiao Wan's head and scolded a Shanghai dialect, as if she was not angry or something.

I smiled wryly, and secretly said in my heart: Xiao Wan is enough to fight for me, and she will enter the soul in one shot......

The future mother-in-law sneered at me and said categorically: "You go, we will dispose of the child." ”

"What!" I exploded when I heard it, "Whoever dares to touch my child, I am in a hurry!"

The mother-in-law stood up and pointed at me and scolded: "Don't come with me! Do you think you can force me to marry my daughter to you?

"You ......" I rolled up my sleeves and prepared to fight with my mother-in-law for three hundred rounds, Xiao Wan quickly got up and persuaded me to go out.

Alas, it's still too tender, it's too hasty...... Everyone must take me as a lesson: if you use this trick in the future, you must give birth to the child first, and then the raw rice will not only be cooked into cooked rice, but also served on the table, see if they buy it!

The trick was broken, and I completely offended my future mother-in-law, and I was very depressed. I couldn't say a few words when I called Xiaowan, and it was even more impossible to ask her out, and I had a faint sense of foreboding.

......

Sure enough, within a few days, bad news came: the child in Xiaowan's belly was removed...... I've never had a girl beat a child for me, and I feel like a responsible man should do that.

I rushed to Xiao Wan's house in a rage, ready to make a big fuss in the Heavenly Palace, but I didn't even enter the door, and I was taken away by the police. When the police comrade learned what had happened, he did not embarrass me, but persuaded me with understanding and sympathy, and then let me go after warning me not to violently break down the door again.

Xiaowan called me and persuaded me a few words, although I didn't propose to break up, but I knew that there was little hope. Marriage is the grave of love, but if there is not even a grave, then love can only die without a place to be buried......

I wandered around the beach for a few days like a lonely ghost, and the depression in my heart could not be dissolved. At night, when I saw the news of the opening of Disney Park on TV, I remembered that the two packages I had booked before were still in my wallet, and the tickets for 499 yuan could not be wasted.

I don't want to use words like crowds to describe how many people are at Disneyland, just make a simple comparison, there were enough people queuing up at the Shanghai World Expo, and now there are twice as many people here at Disneyland as there are at the World Expo! If you come by private car, then congratulations, go back and drive 10 kilometers to find a place to park the car yourself and then squeeze the subway.

I sold a ticket for a "super low price" of 1,000 dollars in the midst of a surging crowd. You ask me why I only sell one? I'm out of love, can't I just be willful!

Squeezed into the park, there were children laughing and crying everywhere, which reminded me of my own children who had not yet succeeded, and I was even more sad. I walked briskly away from the fairytale Mickey Avenue, determined to find some excitement.

"Paradise Express - the world's newest, fastest and most exciting fully enclosed roller coaster, the real king of roller coasters!"

Sitting in the individually sealed cockpit and looking at the towering tracks, I suddenly remembered that I had a fear of heights, and I didn't like to go to the balconies of buildings above six floors, and the floor-to-ceiling windows on more than 10 floors could make me lie on the floor and dare not move......

"Stop, let me down!" I shouted and pushed the door open...... It's late! The doors are locked, and the Paradise Express starts slowly, which is really exciting!

As the elevation continued to rise, the crowd on the ground became farther and farther away from me, and I began to panic...... This Nima is almost thirty stories high! I clung to the safety bar on my arm, ready to die......

At this time, the express train stopped, isn't it broken? I just flashed such a question mark in my mind, and suddenly I felt empty in my heart, and the whole person fell straight down, as if falling into an endless abyss......

I'm going to die! I closed my eyes tightly, held my breath, and shivered. I wanted to scream loudly, but I couldn't open my mouth, and it seemed like only a few seconds to live and not to die, and it seemed like tens of thousands of years long.

In this moment, I remembered my childhood, my parents, and a very important thing: if I were to be killed by this Paradise Express, Disney would definitely pay my parents a lot of money, which should be enough for them to live for a long time. Thinking of this, I suddenly stopped being afraid. Do you know that as long as life and death are broken, people will really become very bold and determined......

As soon as the Paradise Express landed at the bottom, it immediately turned its head and climbed. I was thrust against the back of my chair with a strong force, and I soared up like a rocket...... Rise...... Rise...... Why does the paralysis keep rising, and the ascension can't reach the end! Nima, is this Heaven Express going straight to heaven?

I don't know how long it took, but I stopped, opened my eyes, and was stunned...... There is no Paradise Express around, only an endless sea of clouds. In front of a tattered archway, one of the four pillars is broken, and there are three rusty characters on the plaque: Nantianmen......! How does this Nantianmen look like the Old Summer Palace that was burned by fire?

Damn, I'm dead!

After three seconds, I accepted the fact that lovelorn people are really not afraid of death. You don't agree? That just shows that you don't love deeply enough.

I stood there and waited for a while, but I didn't see anyone coming to receive me, so I tried to shout: "Demon Liqing, Demon Lihong, Four Heavenly Kings?"

It's strange, since this is the South Heavenly Gate, it should be guarded by the Four Heavenly Kings, why didn't anyone respond?

I took a few steps forward, passed through the South Heavenly Gate, and tore my throat and shouted, "Is there anyone?"

Anyone......

People......

Is it ......

"Where are the fanatics making a loud noise here!" With an angry shout, a golden-armored black-faced heavenly general with a group of heavenly soldiers suddenly appeared around and surrounded me, the heavenly soldiers and heavenly generals were murderous, but the armor on his body was a little badly damaged.

I was startled and quickly explained, "I just came up......"

"Just flew up?" the black-faced Heavenly General glanced me up and down, "Hmph! Look at your strange appearance, you must be a spy sent by the Extraterritorial Heavenly Demon, don't try to deceive the general's eyes!"

"Uh......" I looked down at myself, a short-sleeved shirt and jeans, which really didn't match the style of this Nantianmen.

"Swallow and vomit, sneaky!" the black-faced heavenly general beckoned, "Come on! Tie me up, press the demon slaying platform, and correct the Fa on the spot!"

I was suddenly shocked and hurriedly said, "Wait! Stop...... Wait a minute! Hey, hey, hey......"

But the heavenly soldiers couldn't help but say, tied me up and left.

"Wronged! spare my life! Help......" I shouted all the way, what kind of trouble is this Nima going to make, and he will be killed before he finishes three sentences? I said that I am not afraid of death, but I also don't want to be unjustly killed without knowing it!

In a short time, I was tied to a stone pillar in the middle of a large circular stone platform. The black-faced heavenly general stood in front of me, majestic, "No matter where you are demons and monsters, on this demon slaying platform, it will make your soul annihilated, and you will never be able to be reborn!"

"I'm grass!" "It's miserable enough to die just once, you want me to destroy my soul indiscriminately, it's too bullying! I scolded: "The black carbon head of the grass mud horse! You guys are so careless about human life, are you still unreasonable? Do you still have a royal law?"

"Reason, Wang Fa, Okay, I'm going to let you die. The black-faced Heavenly General smiled sarcastically, "You said you just flew up?" But do you know that the path to immortal ascension has long been cut off, and mortals have not been allowed to ascend for five hundred years, and immortals cannot go to the lower realm. Tell me, how did you get there?"

I hurriedly replied, "I...... I flew up on the Paradise Express......"

"What kind of monster is the Heaven Express? When he dies, he still wants to fool the general. The black-faced heavenly general raised his palm and slashed down, "Cut it for me!"

A silver-armored celestial soldier with a tiger's back came out in response, wielding a huge axe the size of a bathtub and slashing at my neck......

......