16. Love and hate have been entangled for 10,000 years
Coptis clears heat and removes dryness, Coptis chinensis pours fire and detoxifies, Coptis chinensis is a medicine, what does Coptis chinensis taste like?
It was the dumb man who couldn't say that he was suffering from eating Coptis chinensis, and Daoist Fang came to ask for advice with hope, but he didn't expect to give him a head and face, and he was taught a lesson and humiliated from beginning to end, and he ended up with nothing to gain, and he was not bullshit, but he had nothing to say, so he could only cry there! You said this, hey! Don't complain about Daoist Fang, you have to complain about this matter, you don't say a word for three years, and when you talk about it, it will be three years, who will suffer? Enlighten a person to come slowly, educate a child to come slowly, to moisturize things silently, the water flows from shallow to deep step by step, hey! Anyway, Daoist Fang can't stand it, Daoist Fang can't accept such a sudden thunder and lightning bolt-like teaching method, Daoist Fang really can't bear such a heavy blow!
Who am I? Who am I? This is the biggest proposition in the world since ancient times, and it is also the biggest problem, how many great sages and great powers cannot be broken, even the chief of the Su Daoist himself cannot see through it, you ask this kind of question to Daoist Fang, and what do you ask Daoist Fang to answer you? What do you want Daoist Fang to say to you! Sad, annoying, lamentable, in the end, you can only exchange for a person who weeps alone, and a poor heart that hurts: "Demon, demon!"
Fang Yin's mind was already wooden, Fang Yin seemed to be thinking a lot, but Fang Yin didn't know what he was thinking, and he didn't know when he lost his soul and walked into the firewood room, plunged into the firewood and grass and never moved again. It was like sleeping instead of sleeping, and I didn't know that it was dark and the sky was still bright. It's so muddy, I think of something, I don't think of anything. Dizziness, headache, groggy, I don't know how long it has been, how long, it's still the same, confused and loose, but there seems to be a tendon in my brain, tense, tight, tight as if it's going to-
Break!
Suddenly I opened my eyes and sat up, and it was already dark!
There was silence around me in the darkness, but there was a buzzing sound in my ears, like whispering, like talking, like singing, like crying. Everything around me looked so familiar, but suddenly it was unfamiliar: "Where is this? Where is this? This is the firewood house, this is Baicao Peak, this is Shangqing Mountain, this is a small corner between heaven and earth, and I am here, and I, who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who is me, ahββββββββββ"
I can't think about this question, I just think about it, I can't think about it, I still think about it. I'm not Boss Fang, Boss Fang is just the past, I'm not Daoist Fang, Daoist Fang is just identity, I'm not Fang Yin, Fang Yin is just a name, I'm not this, I'm not that, I'm just me, but who am I? I am a person? What is a person? What is a person living for, what is a person dead? What am I living for? What do I have and what I don't have? I: "Ahββββββββββββββββββ"
Is this entering the Dao? Or is it enchanted! Fang Yin roared and lay down, wanting to cry without tears for a while. There is nowhere to put my heart, my eyes are tired and unspeakable, but I can no longer close them! I am afraid in the dark, there is no light and heat, so cold, so cold, so cold! I just want to keep the faint warmth in my heart, but the door of my heart has been opened, but all the chaotic thoughts are pouring in, like a wild horse rushing like a torrent, and in one fell swoop the seemingly solid but extremely fragile line of defense that has been hard to manage!
Break!
Walking alone, desolate and ruined temples, brothers in distress, snuggled together-
Who is that? The sneering eyes, the look of pity, the messy scraps and the cold leftovers, in the dark corner under the wall next to the ditch where the sun can't shine even the sun? Xiao Fangzi, Xiao Fangzi, Xiao Fangzi -- Fang Yin, Fang Yin, Fang Yin! It's Lao Xue, Lao Xue gave me my name, Lao Xue brought me to Shangqing, but where is Lao Xue now? Leave me alone, how can this be! Yes that! Yes that! It was the pungent bloody breath, the bright red, dark red, purple, black, red, and red, and the boundless sea of blood seeping out of the deepest and darkest place in the bottom of my heart, rushing and roaring, surging over, coming, coming, coming, coming.
Daddy!
Yes, what you said is not wrong, what you say is not wrong, I am a coward, a poor and even more ridiculous person! I refuse to learn boxing, I don't want to learn swords, I don't want to practice, just because I'm afraid, I'm afraid of being ridiculed, being ridiculed and looked down upon, I'm afraid that I'm inferior to others! Yes, yes, I'm playing, I'm laughing, I'm screaming loudly, I'm in the company of birds and beasts, I'm having fun with them, I'm killing them, I'm eating meat, drinking blood, biting hard, just because I want revenge, I hate this world, it's a miserable fate and a cry of powerlessness! I am a poor person, I hate myself with hatred, but I never dare to face my life, I am just a selfish and cowardly coward!
I can't help but want to, I can only suppress it.
I dreamed back a few times, and I was depressed a few times.
Suppressed, depressed, depressed, if it's a donkey, and donkey temper, but, but, but I-
Who is the real self?
It was night, Fang Yin couldn't sleep, the darkness tossed and turned, and the grass couldn't bury his trembling and tearful body and mind.
And the darkness and chaos of heaven and earth converged into a cocoon, allowing him to struggle, roll, tremble,
Where is the way out?
One word.
It is
Change.
The next day, in the afternoon, the sun fell westward.
A little monkey probed his brain, stopped and walked, looking nervous and scared, and his face full of unhappiness.
"Haha, one hundred and eight, you've come to see me?"
"Squeak!" One hundred and eight jumped up in surprise, but saw a big hand stretched out from behind the room, which suddenly turned into a finger and hooked.
What's going on?
One hundred and eight pounded in his heart, holding his breath and sliding over, just hoping to see: "Squeak, squeak, squeak!" One hundred and eight shouted happily, jumping into the warm embrace of the party: "I haven't been there for a few days, but you came to the door, haha! You miss me, right?" Fang Yin touched the monkey's head and asked with a smile. One hundred and eight can't speak, one hundred and eight just nods. Fang Yin sighed, and said with a smile: "Fortunately, you came to see me, I was very uncomfortable, and I was even more bored, and I was sick, why don't you come and touch it, is it hot?"
"Sure enough, I was sick, and I was not lightly ill. The little monkey nodded again and again, and hurriedly leaned over and blew with his mouth, wanting to cool him down, "Haha!hahahaha!" Fang Yin laughed: "One hundred and eight, you can really do it! Okay, okay, don't blow it yet, I'll ask you another question, do you know, why am I sitting here?"
One hundred and eight nodded repeatedly.
"Because this side is warmer and brighter, and I am afraid of the dark and the cold. β
One hundred and eight nodded repeatedly.
"Haha, haha, then let me ask you again, what kind of person am I?"
One hundred and eight nodded repeatedly.
"I'm a coward, I'm a wretch, I'm a useless person, right?"
One hundred and eight nodded in a row!
One hundred and eight is just a little monkey, one hundred and eight is not Sun Wukong, one hundred and eight will not change seventy-two. One hundred and eight will nod their heads, and one hundred and eight will nod their heads no matter what you say, whether it's right or wrong, good or bad. But there is also a change in one hundred and eight, that is, it has learned to listen, even if it doesn't understand, even if it doesn't know how to pretend to understand, but he's listening, he only listens, he won't interrupt your words so that you can continue, and that's the real reason why one hundred and eight is likable.
In fact, one hundred and eight is also very miserable, in fact, one hundred and eight is also very miserable, it is also an orphan, its parents have been eaten by jackals, and the big brothers and sisters think it is small and unwilling to take it to play, it is often very depressed, often very lonely, often insecure, often very scared! One hundred and eight is more timid, one hundred and eight is more pitiful, one hundred and eight is even more useless, but one hundred and eight does not say, who is he complaining about and who is complaining?
One hundred and eight laughed again.
You see, with the first change, there will be a second change, maybe one hundred and eight will also be seventy-two changes in the future, and there will be a river and sea to make trouble in the heavenly palace or something: "But one hundred and eight, I don't want to go on like this, I want to do this, I want to do this, you say, what am I going to do?" The lazy sun shone on his body, and on it was a pale face and two red and swollen eyes. One hundred and eight nodded again, and nodded while laughing, looking very supportive: "Squeak!"
"But I don't have any ability now, and I don't have any confidence at all, I'm afraid I can't do this, don't you say?" One hundred and eight nodded and smiled, and his mouth was still babbling words that no one could understand. Boss Fang smiled tiredly, and said softly to one hundred and eight: "It's okay if it succeeds, it's okay if it doesn't, but I always have to give it a try, otherwise I'll regret it, but I really regret it, do you say?"
"Yes!" said One Hundred and Eight.
Of course, one hundred and eight expressed this, as always, with nods and laughter and self-talk.
"Yes, yes, that's good, one hundred and eight, now I just want to get a good night's sleep, but between sleeps I have to fill my stomach first, and then I will have the strength to exhaleβ" Of course one hundred and eight has no opinion, one hundred and eight has not eaten or slept well in the past two days, and my heart is always thinking about this dear king! Of course, I think more about roasted chicken legs. One hundred and eight loves to eat grilled chicken thighs more than to love to eat grilled chicken feet, because the meat on the chicken feet is more tendonous, but there is more meat on the chicken legs, but one hundred and eight don't like to eat chicken butts, why is this?
Because the chicken butt is fragrant, tender and oily, one hundred and eight don't love it.
The king stood up, patted his ass and left.
One hundred and eight farts walked after his ass: "Squeak! squeak!" Yes, yes, because the chicken ass is too fragrant and tender and too oily, so one hundred and eight was so anxious that he accidentally burned it! Talking has been scalded dozens of times! Can he not teach a long lesson! So one hundred and eight doesn't love it anymore! And every time he thinks about it, he hates it to the core! Even if it used to be one hundred and eight favorite, one hundred and eight will never love it again! I don't want to look at it! I don't want to think about it: "Squeak, squeak, squeak!"
"Oh! One hundred and eight, I've said it dozens of times, you can't blow it like that! Teach you not to remember your last name for a long time, take a look-"
It's hot again?;