"Brother Xu, Brother Xu. ”

Xu Mo was in a daze, he heard someone calling for him, and when he opened his eyes, he saw Qin Ruolan's concerned eyes at a glance.

"You're awake!" Qin Ruolan saw him open his eyes, and a look of surprise appeared on his face.

He hadn't been fainting for long. Qin Ruolan lived in a nearby hotel with her son, and when she heard the explosion, she also ran out to see. When Xu Mo returned, she was crowding at the front of the crowd. She saw Xu Mo, Xu Mo only thought about Xiaoqing, but didn't see her.

Seeing Xu Mo unconscious, he hurriedly squeezed through the crowd.

"You're fine, that's great, Brother Xu, I'm still worried that you were in the room when the explosion occurred. Qin Ruolan then said that she really cared about Xu Mo, but she didn't have any sadness about the life and death of others.

As for Xu Mo's reason why she was outdoors and survived the explosion when the explosion occurred, she felt faintly strange, but she didn't ask.

"Xiaoqing, Xiaoqing. ”

He nodded to Qin Ruolan, and immediately remembered Xiaoqing, got up from the ground at the moment, broke through the cordon desperately, and rushed towards the ruins.

"Hey, what are you doing?"

A policeman shouted, several people came to stop him, two policemen grabbed his arm, one left and one right, put him up, dragged him out, and said: "It's dangerous inside, don't go in." ”

Xu Mo only thought about Xiaoqing in his heart, where could he take care of any danger, and while struggling, he asked loudly, "Have you seen Xiaoqing?"

One of the policemen looked more amiable, listened to his questioning, and responded as if Xiaoqing was him, living in that building: "We are rescuing, and we haven't found the living yet, so you can mourn." ”

He said it very tactfully, in fact, the whole building was blown up like that, how could there be survivors?

As soon as Xu Mo heard this, he knew that he had misunderstood what he meant, and hurriedly said, "No, Xiaoqing is a snake, have you seen it?"

When the policeman heard this, he glared at him, and thought to himself: No one can be saved, what kind of snake do you care about? ”

"Brother Xu. Qin Ruolan rushed over, greeted Xu Mo, and saw that the policeman was more amiable, and asked, "Officer, what's going on here?"

The policeman gave her a wary look and asked, "Who are you?"

Qin Ruolan replied cautiously: "We are also residents here, and we happened not to live here tonight, so we escaped the catastrophe." ”

"You're in luck. "A bespectacled 50-year-old man, accompanied by a man who looked like a police officer, was coming out of it with a few papers in his hand. His identity should be the investigator of this accident, and when he heard Qin Ruolan's words, he shook his head again and again, and interjected: "The high-voltage line is short-circuited, and it happens to encounter a natural gas leak in the kitchen, and what's even more terrifying is that next to the kitchen, there is actually a gas tank warehouse, and your safety awareness here is really poor." ”

The man, who looked like a police officer, then asked, "Professor Xu, isn't it artificial?"

The old man said, "Not really, the possibility of an accident is greater." ”

The man who looked like a police officer let out an 'oh' when he heard this, and seemed to be relieved, if it was a man-made or terrorist attack, he couldn't get rid of the responsibility, and the accident was nothing.

Xu Mo took advantage of the unpreparedness of the policemen and broke in again. The policemen didn't stop him for a while, and they were sure that it was an accident, and their precautions were immediately relaxed a lot, so they let him go.

Xu Mo ran all the way to the ruins, calling Xiaoqing's name loudly, looking for a long time, but received no response.

He sat down on the snow in a dejected manner, feeling as if the sky had collapsed, and the whole world was darkened, and he couldn't help crying loudly.

The Book of Revelation had already given a hint, but he misunderstood its meaning and did not leave with Qin Ruolan when she left with her son. Xiaoqing repeatedly gave warnings, only hated himself for being stupid, did not understand its meaning, the reason why it bit its finger, but it turned out to be to save itself, but hated that he had misunderstood it at the time, thinking that he had been poisoned.

It saved itself, but died in the accident.

He remembered Xiaoqing's various benefits, remembered that during his most difficult time, he couldn't afford to eat, and only had two steamed buns a day, although it was a snake, it had spirituality, and for himself, he stole money from the outside and came back, and was injured... , remembered that he had been wronged outside, and when he returned home, only Xiaoqing could tell...

During this period of time, he has lived in pain and despair every day, and he can't see the slightest hope in life and the future, and he has long regarded Xiaoqing as the sustenance of his life, which supports him, lets him live, gives him strength, and makes him strong.

At the moment, Xiaoqing didn't know whether he was alive or dead, and this kind of strength seemed to leave his body suddenly.

When his parents disappeared, although he was also devastated by the disappearance, he did not feel as deeply as he did now because he had experienced all kinds of hardships in his life.

At this time, there was no Xiaoqing, and I suddenly felt that between heaven and earth, it turned out that I was just a person who no one cared about and no one asked.

In despair, he just thought in his heart: Xiaoqing is dead, and I don't want to live anymore.

After crying for a while, he felt that a hand was pulling him up, but he didn't resist, instinctively stood up and walked out.

Qin Ruolan called him from behind: "Brother Xu, Brother Xu, where are you going?" He didn't hear it at all.

He was lost and depressed, he didn't know the direction, and he kept moving forward by feeling. The cold wind howled, blowing the snow into his neck, melting, and running down his body, but he couldn't feel it at all.

I don't know how long it took for him to feel tired, so he instinctively sat down and lay on the ground. It was the evening of the second day, and his current position was right under a flyover, among a few holly trees.

At the end of this day, he was desperate and depressed, thinking only of death, his mental will had long been completely numb, and he had long lost consciousness of hunger and cold. When I lay down, I felt dazed, and my consciousness slowly left my body.

It won't be long before he dies. He no longer has any nostalgia for this world, but a smile appears on his face.

At this moment, someone outside the overpass suddenly shouted: "Who?" The sound was very loud, but Xu Mo was already confused, and he didn't hear this sound at all.

Outside the overpass were a man and a woman, both of whom were not very old, and the woman was holding the man's arm, which was so intimate that it was easy to see that they were a couple.

It was about half past ten in the evening, and the snow had been falling since the previous night, and it had been raining all night, and it had been raining for another day, and it had not stopped. There were few pedestrians on the road, and the young couple was outside, so they were inevitably afraid, and when they passed by the overpass, the man heard movement under the overpass, and couldn't help but shout and ask.

The woman was startled by his sudden voice, and hurriedly whispered, "What's wrong?"

The man glanced under the overpass again, looked at the holly bush where Xu Mo was lying, and said in a deep voice: "There was movement there just now, and there are people below." ”

The woman shook her head and said, "It's so late, how can there be anyone?"

The man didn't answer, but asked again where Xu Mo was lying, "Who?

Xu Mo's consciousness was getting more and more blurred, and he vaguely felt that someone was talking to him, but he didn't have the strength to answer.

The man broke free from the woman's grasp and whispered, "I'll go and see." ”

The woman was frightened in her heart, worried that she would meet a bad person, so she hurriedly grabbed him and dissuaded: "How can there be people in such a place? It must be a mouse, don't go over, be careful to stain your clothes." ”

When the man heard her say this, he immediately hesitated.

The woman saw the opportunity and said, "It's so cold, I'm about to freeze to death." As he spoke, he rubbed his hands, stomped his feet, covered his mouth with his hands, and sighed into his palms, which seemed to be really cold, and continued to persuade: "Even if there are people, it has nothing to do with us, let's go home quickly." ”

The man glanced at her, his heart softened, he stopped insisting, and responded, "Okay." ”

Seeing this, the woman took his arm again, and pulled him away quickly.

Mouse?

Xu Mo listened to what the woman said unintentionally, but a feeling of extreme humiliation welled up in his heart, and he subconsciously clenched his fists, and somehow, his consciousness suddenly became sober, and he gradually regained consciousness.

"Mouse!

He sat up, muttered a few words, and lay down again.

He walked in the snow all night and day, his clothes were already wet, and as soon as he regained consciousness, he immediately felt the cold, and he tried to curl up as much as he could, but his body kept shaking, and his teeth chattered.

Thinking of his parents, thinking of Xiaoqing, thinking of the hardships he has experienced in the past two years, and thinking of the situation at this time, he couldn't help crying, and he was hoarse and hoarse, and his voice was hoarse.

There were people passing by the overpass, and their cries were heard, but no one stopped to look in his direction.

He was so drowsy that in the midst of his weeping he fell asleep again. As soon as I fell asleep, I had a nightmare and cried out: "I am not a mouse, I am not a mouse." "Wake up.

But when I woke up, I found myself in a nightmare. The person was awake, but for no reason he felt an inexplicable fear, his eyes were open, looking at the holly trees around him, his ears could clearly hear the whining wind outside the overpass, but his body could not move.

He was so frightened that he tried to sit up, but his body was completely out of control, he couldn't move a little finger, he wanted to cry out for help, but he couldn't, and there was a strange 'cooing' sound in his throat.

This feeling of loss of control made him indescribably afraid, he forced himself to calm down, slowly accumulating strength, I don't know how long it took to feel the strength suddenly return to him, and sat up violently. gasping for breath, I realized that my whole body was soaked with cold sweat.

The feeling of fear was not completely dispelled, and he struggled to his feet and stepped out from under the overpass. At this time, it was already the middle of the night, and under the street lamp, the snow was flying all over the sky, and it seemed to be falling even bigger.

Suddenly he sensed something was wrong, and looked down at himself, his shirt unbuttoned, his arms open, his chest exposed to the air.

The snow was heavy and the wind was heavy, but countless sweat kept pouring out of his chest, and he didn't feel the cold at all.

The quiet breath he was striving for was actually achieved today.

——————

PS: I want to say that if people are extremely depressed and bent on dying, like in this chapter, they will really die. Like a monk who passed away, they meditated all day long, thinking about nothing, and over time, when they really wanted to die, they didn't have any worries in their hearts, and they could die soon

There is also a story that you may have all heard, an old couple, the old lady lingered on the sickbed for many years, the old man took care of her, and one day, the old lady died, and the old man held her hand and followed

These methods of death, in principle, are actually similar to euthanasia

Finally, the nightmare written in this chapter is actually the author's personal experience