I looked back at the message he had left me before, and instead of telling him where I was, I typed quickly and asked, "Chen Daowei, who did you hear that I left Zhanjiang?"

Chen Daowei didn't leave to reply to me, but after about ten minutes, he slowly sent a small expression, and after sending the expression, he said: "It seems that your thinking is quite clear, but your emotional intelligence is worrying." I'll just find such an excuse to talk to you, and you're still *** serious. Seeing that you can still surf the Internet, it is estimated that you will not be able to die for a while. It seems that I still think too much about myself, and I want to be a hero to save the beauty again to deepen my impression. Who knows that you, Lin Sisi, are not on the same channel as me. Okay, don't say a good thing, you get out. An uninteresting woman like you should be lonely for the rest of her life. ”

After speaking, Chen Daowei immediately went offline, and his avatar went black all of a sudden.

I was at a loss, so distraught that I had to quickly rummage through Lin Shanshan's number.

I finally turned it out, and I told Lin Shanshan that I had come to Shenzhen, and now I was near Luohu International Trade Center, and asked her how to take the car to Henggang Flooding Wai.

Lin Shanshan didn't reply to me for a long time, and I saw that it was raining lightly outside, and I was on the Internet for an hour, and I had to deduct money if I continued, so I got off the plane and returned the card, dragging my luggage and braving the light rain to continue looking for a store.

When I walked to the Jincheng Building, I finally found a place to make a phone call in the small alley next to it.

With extremely complicated feelings, I dialed Lin Shanshan's mobile phone number.

She probably happened to be playing with her phone, and she picked it up as soon as it rang.

I just said Lin Shanshan, I am Lin Sisi, and Lin Shanshan said in a hurry: "Lin Sisi, my mother asked me to ask you why you came to Shenzhen in such a good manner? The place our family rented is too small, and there is no place for you to live, do you have other friends in Shenzhen that you can take refuge in temporarily? She said that if you say no, then let me go and pick you up first, help you find a cheap hotel, and then you can find a house." And Lin Sisi, there is no good housing near our family's rental, my mother asked you to rent a little farther, what do you think?"

Lin Shanshan's string of words made me stunned directly.

It turned out that Lin Shanshan had received my message a long time ago, but she just didn't reply to me.

My hand holding the microphone trembled.

In the past two years, I have endured countless such encounters, but there has never been a moment like this one, when I was so easily overwhelmed by the endless loneliness.

I suddenly felt that I had made a mistake in coming to Shenzhen impulsively from the beginning, and I held the microphone and was silent for a while, I tried to stabilize my voice, and said, "Oh, I have other friends in Shenzhen, I'll call them later." You don't have to come to me, I can do it myself, you guys get busy first, I won't bother you. ”

After hanging up the phone, when I took out the money from my pocket and gave it to the boss, the more I put the money against me, the more I reached out, the more they ran deep into my pocket, I couldn't catch them, my hands were red, and I reluctantly took out a dollar and handed it to the boss.

When the fat proprietress retrieved the four cents for me, she looked at me with a little amusement, and my heart suddenly panicked, grabbed the coins, carried the luggage, and hurried back.

At the corner of the alley, I walked too fast, and I didn't pay attention to the road, I stepped on a banana peel coldly, my center of gravity was not stable, my thighs went all the way forward, and the back of my head came into close contact with the ground.

As the back of my head hit the ground and hit my eardrums, I didn't feel any pain in the back of my head, but I felt hopelessly painful in my abdomen.

Subconsciously, I covered my stomach.

But the pain intensified, and I soon became in a trance, and my vision was blurred.

At this moment, I really wish I could die like this, I also thought that I would die like this, like all homeless homeless people, in this strange city, so I died silently, so I couldn't help but scold in this strange city at the strange sky: "Yu Minghui, you bastard, I'll go to your uncle's bastard!"

But in fact, although dying is a very easy and simple thing, and living must go through hardships and sufferings and baptism, most people will eventually choose to live with difficulty, rather than die for a moment of comfort.

I, Lin Sisi, have no exception.

I survived in the end.

After coming out of the hospital, I dragged my extremely heavy luggage and found a small mossy house at the intersection of Longgang Lingnan Road, I put on flat shoes and walked to many thrift markets, bargaining desperately, adding daily necessities little by little, and decorating the house that was only 11 square meters like that.

At the beginning, with the little foundation I had at work with diligent pay before, and because my English was really good, but also because I was thin and couldn't keep up with nutrition, as long as I dressed loosely, I easily concealed the fact that I was pregnant. I finally got a job as a clerk in a gallery in Dafen, and I made orders every day, and when a client came over, I would take them to see the paintings, and I could get a salary of 2,000 yuan a month, which was not bad.

After work, I was able to pick up some fabric at the nearby shredded market and try my hand at sewing children's clothes.

I stayed in that gallery for three months unharmed.

Until one day, when I was at work, there was an Indian guest whose eyes were constantly glued to my chest from the moment he walked through the door, and when I showed him the paintings, his eyes were still impartial. Although I was not happy with it, and I decided to be patient for the sake of work, but when he confirmed the order, I accompanied him and a young man to the warehouse to pick up the goods, and when the young man arrived at the warehouse to move the goods, the customer's hand grabbed me by the hand and pulled me to him, I was caught off guard and staggered, and my stomach almost hit the corner of the table next to me.

I got into a hurry, shook off the guest's hand like crazy, and freed my hand to protect my stomach.

And the guest, who was not tall at all, was thrown by me like this, and he fell down, not only crushing several purple clay pots, but also having several wounds on his back from porcelain tiles.

Li Jing, the proprietress of this store, although she has other jobs, she rarely comes to the store, and rarely contacts me, but she may see me as a woman, and she needs to be pitiful and depressed to hide the fact that she is pregnant to come out to work, she guesses that I have reached the point where I can't open the pot, she is sympathetic and sympathetic for a while, she did not deduct a penny from me, but arranged for the finance to settle all the wages to me, and she also left me a mobile phone number, so that I thought that I needed help and could find her. I knew she was polite, thanked her, took the money and left.

In this way, I lost my first job after coming to Shenzhen.

took the 1751 yuan salary back to my nest, and after all my thoughts were lost, I took the copycat mobile phone that I bought from Huaqiangbei for more than 100 yuan.

Not long after I went up, Zhao Xiaoning's message was sent.

In the past three months, after I changed my mobile phone number, Zhao Xiaoning and I did not talk on the phone again, we occasionally chatted on QQ, although she didn't know the reason why I broke up with Yu Minghui, but she knew the result, she sighed, and spared no effort to comfort me many times, with special warm words to encourage me, so that I don't feel too lonely.

Now, when she asks me if I'm there, even though I've just lost my job and I'm in a bad mood, I still quickly reply to her and say, "I'm here." ”

Zhao Xiaoning was silent over there for a while, and after half a sound, she sent a picture over.

My phone is so bad, the signal is not very good, let alone how good the network can be, that photo rotates in that small phone screen for a long time, and it still can't be displayed.

So I asked, "Xiao Ning, what did you send?"

It seemed like a century had passed, and Zhao Xiaoning's avatar jumped up slowly, and when I clicked it, several lines of words came to my eye.

The famous Brother Hui is getting married. The bride is the Cao Jiaying who looks like a two-five-eight all day long. Today they came over together to send a wedding card, a pair of sluts, dogs, men and women, sluts!

I stared at the small mobile phone screen, looking at this sentence over and over again, probably in response to the saying that a pregnant fool is three years old, I watched it for nearly ten minutes before I slowly reacted, Zhao Xiaoning meant that Yu Minghui was going to marry Cao Jiaying.

I thought I would hug my head and cry, like every time I dreamed back at midnight in the past few days, dreaming that he was rushing towards me with Ada, and when I woke up to find that there was nothing but silent dust in the small room, I was so lost and helpless put my hand on my abdomen and burst into tears, but my eyes were like a great desert that had not rained a drop of rain for more than ten years, so dry that I could not find any oasis with moisture.

I held my mobile phone and hugged my shoulders, and sat in a fixed posture in a corner of the ** side and was silent for nearly two hours, I slowly pressed the unlock button, and I slowly typed and replied to Zhao Xiaoning, I said: "Don't mention that person to me in the future, the story between me and him is over." ”

I know that I really have no money, I have bought too many orders for other people's mistakes, and I have paid too much price to get the same feedback, I still look forward to one day when I come back from work, the man named Yu Minghui will appear downstairs in my house, he doesn't have to lead Ada, he can do it himself, he confessed to me personally, confessed his young and arrogant big mistakes, he asked for my forgiveness, he sincerely said that the person he loves is me, or my Lin Sisi, this cowardly bun who has been unlucky for most of his life, this poor man who can completely move and melt with a little warmth, or will not hesitate to run to him again without hesitation, as if he had never left.

I think that even if I occasionally think of the cruelty he committed to me after running to him, it will hurt my nerves from time to time, and I am willing to compromise this cruel life for the sake of the life in my belly.

But today I realized that all of this was my delusion.

The story between me and the man with the voice of the sea breeze became a disconnect.

Even if he once hugged me, pityfully like hugging the whole world, even if his lips once kissed my lips, even if he once said countless pretentious love words to me, even if he once gave me the illusion that I could live together forever, even if he once warmed my cold heart, I still had to lose him in a particularly helpless posture, watching him run to the front where I would live better without me.

Yes, the story between me and him is really over.

And even the signal of China Unicom is full of mocking malice towards me,I just sent this sentence over,The photo that has been circling in circles just now was abruptly downloaded,This red and glamorous invitation,It occupies the entire screen domineeringly,I saw Yu Minghui and Cao Jiaying's names side by side leaning side by side,I hopelessly found,Their names are so well matched,They really should love each other and eliminate harm for the people。

I moved my fingers and deleted this invitation, which looked particularly annoying.

And Zhao Xiaoning didn't send any more messages, or she felt that she hurt me by reporting Yu Minghui's recent situation to me like this, and she didn't know how to remedy or comfort her, so she simply kept silent.

And I was silent.

I sent a message to say about it.

Two very simple words, I said, "Blind heart." ”

There are a number of netizens with unfamiliar nicknames who left mocking messages below, asking me if I am not blind, what is the matter with my heart being blind.

At this moment when the story between me and Yu Minghui was completely over, I had been tormented by loneliness and loneliness to the point of going crazy during this time, and I didn't have the urge to reply to those netizens at all.

I turned off my phone, closed the broken curtains, and got myself a soy sauce fried noodles with eggs and lettuce, and I kept pouring boiling water into my mouth as I stuffed the noodles into my mouth, trying to warm myself up in this way, but this summer got a little weird, it was even colder than any winter I'd ever had.

Fortunately, this difficult and cold summer will eventually pass.

Fortunately, all the wounds that were once bloody and blurred will always heal one day.

Fortunately, after experiencing too much baptism and destruction of the cruel truth, I was able to become an invincible and iron-hearted person.

In the summer of 2012, I finally fulfilled my blue sea and blue sky with suffering, I no longer be a scoundrel who lives in the crumbling memory of the past, but has become a sleek woman who knows when to round and when to flatten for life, even if I am still stretched, but I no longer doubt life, I feel that although I do not have the natural power of my father, I only have flesh and blood, but I can still chase the sunshine non-stop, I think as long as I am willing to chase, the beautiful opportunities of life will definitely not disappoint me。

However, the ruthless thing of life, it may not be used to my Lin Sisi's blind optimism, it still turns the clouds and rain, so that I met Yu Minghui again after four years of peace and tranquility.

And what makes me cry and laugh is that just like primary school students writing essays, the Chinese teacher always likes to emphasize the echo before and after, and the reunion between me and Yu Minghui is like responding to this emphasis, and it is also on a night with sporadic light rain, and it is also in a night scene where the luxury of fire trees and silver lanterns is red wine and green and drunk gold.

Only this time, he was not a kind person who reached out to me, he was an old man and a guest.