Time has passed, and the scenery here has long lost what it once was, so Xiao Jun and I walked along the path in the direction of the teaching building. Through the half-man-tall weeds, you can see what used to be a basketball court. There are also the two green ball frames, their shadows reflected in the bright sun, as if waving goodbye to us.

"Chen Ye, look here, it used to be that we played basketball here every day, but now it's all broken like this. ”

"yes, who of us would have thought that a good school would become what it is now. ”

"That dilapidated house seems to be our old school building, let's go up and have a look. ”

"Okay, let's go. ”

The classroom was a mess, with broken desks and chairs, and building materials piled up haphazardly. The fonts on the blackboard have long been blurry and illegible, and there are old books displayed lonely on the shelves. The room was full of dust, choking us a little breathless, and I walked into the classroom and opened the window. Then he called Xiao Jun and rummaged through the messy classroom.

Xiao Jun rummaged through the books on the bookshelf and asked suspiciously, "It seems that there is nothing, Chen Ye, have you remembered something?"

"Nope. I replied by standing by the window, then stuck my head out of the window and took a few breaths of fresh air. When I looked up, I saw the hill sitting behind the school, the yellow-brown hills rolling and undulating. Looking further up, the large white clouds seemed to be about to fall on the hills. I suddenly thought of yesterday's dream, so I said to Xiao Jun: "By the way, Xiao Jun, let's go to the mountain behind the school to have a look." ”

"That's fine. ”

Xiao Jun and I walked and watched along the way, looking for a little clue related to the dream. Although the mountain is not high, there are few roads and it is difficult to walk. Before we know it, the sun has set in the west, and we still haven't seen anything. And walking and climbing on this mountain road also consumed a lot of our physical strength, and on the way back we were about to return, Xiao Jun accidentally fell.

I hurriedly ran over to pick him up and asked, "Are you okay?"

"It's okay, it's okay, I just didn't see a stone there. ”

"Be careful. After Xiao Jun stood up, I saw his wallet fall to the ground, so I bent down to pick it up and said to him, "Your wallet has dropped." ”

Just when I picked it up, I took a look, and there was a photo of three people in my wallet, it was me and Xiao Jun, and the other person turned out to be Xia Yan. I thought I was wrong, but judging from what she was wearing in the photo, there would never be anything wrong with it, and I had seen this outfit in my dream before.

"What is this?" Xiao Jun, why ......" I asked, pointing to the photo with a trembling voice.

Xiao Jun looked at me, his face changed suddenly, and he pretended to be calm and said, "It's nothing, it's not early, let's go back first." ”

All of a sudden, a great sense of confusion swept over me, making me feel as if I had been swept up in a storm. I didn't even have time to think, and instinctively said to Xiao Jun: "No, you have to make it clear now." ”

Xiao Jun took a deep breath and took his wallet from my hand, his hand was shaking, and he couldn't hold it for a long time.

After he took it and put it away, I asked, "You say, what the hell is going on? Didn't you say before that you didn't know Xia Yan well? said that I just had a crush on Xia Yan, so why do you have such a picture?"

"Chen Ye, this ......" He was hesitant, as if he wanted to say something, but he didn't know what to say.

Looking at his restrained appearance, I knew that Xiao Jun must have something to hide from me, so he continued: "You should know, I told you everything before, I desperately want to know what those memories I lost are, but you, why did you choose to deceive me?"

Xiao Jun lowered his head at this time and did not answer me.

I sighed and looked up at the night sky, as if I had seen it for the first time, it turned out that the night sky was not black, it seemed to be dark blue with a little purple, and the lights of the city in the distance were full of shadows, with circles of red, yellow, green, and white with raw edges......

After a while, Xiao Jun finally broke the silence and said to me: "Chen Ye, I know your troubles, but I also have my own considerations, what I can tell you now is that you did have a relationship with Xia Yan, we were the best friends at that time, and that photo was also taken shortly after you and Xia Yan dated." I've kept it all these years. ”

You go on. I said.

He sighed, walked behind me step by step, turned his back to me and said, "Chen Ye, I think, since those things have passed, don't worry about it anymore and enjoy your life now." Let's go, let's go back, we have work tomorrow or something. ”

His words were unexpected, and they ignited a flame of anger in my heart, and I yelled at him, "All of you tell me to enjoy life now. What is it like to enjoy life now? Do you forget your past? What I once couldn't forget, I can now forget, I can now forgive people who I used to forgive, and I can't remember the people I loved the most. When the pain and happiness of the past are gone, what am I living for?"

"Chen Ye, you're too paranoid. He walked on his own, saying to me as he went.

I chased after him and asked Xiao Jun desperately: "Why, in order to survive, some people are tormented by illness until the last moment and still refuse to give up, why do some people pass away at a young age." Because you tell them that long pain is better than short pain, that they forget the past, forget everything, and have no worries, and they can find peace and tranquility. But I'm not like that, I don't deceive myself, my past is very important to me, I want to live with care, with the meaning of my life. ”

Xiao Jun didn't answer my words as if he had any scruples.

"Grass and trees, fireworks, barren bones, what have I experienced, people, when everything in this world has nothing to do with you, what is the difference between death and death?" I continued: "Just as the record is to Voyager 1 in the universe, just as the longing for my family is to the soldiers on the battlefield, my past has given me the meaning of life, I can't let go easily, I have to find it." ”

With that, I held back the anger in my heart, turned away, and walked towards the city with its colored lights.

The next day, before I could get up, my mother sent me a package that said that the sender was Xiao Jun, and I opened the package, and inside was a box containing a blue-green covered book.

There is such a sentence written on the notebook: "Chen Ye, this notebook was given to me by Xia Yan when I went abroad, and it is written that Xia Yan thinks of us, I hope it will help you a little." ”