Childhood memories are really beautiful, God has given a group of partners to be born and accompanied by nature, each little life is fresh and fresh, playing hip-hop when together, implanting the first memory.

My first memories are of scenes on the hillside behind the village, spring, summer, autumn and winter, day and night. I can't see the alternation of these pictures, but I know that even in the most depressed season, there is a secret hope in my heart, don't look at the trees and grasses now, they will be like this now, they will die and flourish in the next year, and they will sprout and grow new branches and green leaves, glow with new vitality, and bring coolness to people in summer. Now the cold wind blows on the face, but if you think that the wind is even stronger with the leaves, you will feel a little more grateful. At that time, my hopes were not in harmony with nature, but the more I faced them, the more I felt the insignificance of my life, and I did not dare to hope that things would fall as smoothly as they were. On the branches are happy birds, and a flock of carefree children, who often appear below, also chirp like birds. After the rain, the air is exceptionally fresh, rainbows appear in mid-air, and the mountains that are approaching all of a sudden tempt children to run forward. I don't remember who those were, and I didn't even forget the childlike fun in them, maybe everyone had the same question in their minds, but they didn't discuss it: Is there a heavenly palace on the clouds? What is the wind, rain, thunder and lightning? Why does the moon follow people at night, and those shining stars, are our own eyes blinking?......。 I have more questions, and I am often reticent and shy to be alone.

The adults work hard, and the children are not idle, pretending to do what they can. At that time, I couldn't tell the difference between work and play, and I was neither interested nor bored, and I often retreated after being active for a while. There may be a scorpion hidden in the pile of stones on the hillside, the children know that it can be caught and sold for money, so at noon in the summer heat, often see a group of children bending down with a small iron hook to turn the small stones, if there is, the scorpion instinctively drill into it, with a mouth blow, it will roll up its tail, the body shrinks and does not move, the child with tweezers to pick up and put into the bottle, the luckiest time can catch dozens a day, they will be like a rich man, in fact, they can indeed sell a lot of money, can fill a decent thing for the home. But to be stung by the stinger on the tail, it is a very torturous thing, it will swell for a few days, it hurts for a few days, these naughty children have been stung, it hurts in the heart, and there are constantly children's cries, but the bold people dare to pinch it with their hands, as long as the rolled up thorns are not pierced in the fingers. Sometimes there are snakes lurking in the rocks, they are secluded, or they like to walk in the dark, I know right away that we disturb their routines, as long as we don't lift the stones to smash them, they will slip away, my nature is more like them, and I hope that I can do something silently and not want to be disturbed. In the big pit at the head of the village, we used to bathe and catch fish there. When I first saw fish, it was like seeing life for the first time, and it often came back to my mind after that. There was a kid whose cousin in the city taught everyone the novelty of "fishing", so the children would go home and steal a needle from the sewing box, bake it red and black on a kerosene lamp, and bend a hook with pliers. There are several large bamboo forests in the village, which are probably public, and the children use a sickle to cut one, and then there is a nylon rope and a few inches long, and a simple fishing tool is made, and the bait is a small earthworm dug out of the soil, and of course the catch is only a few inches long.

As a child who loved fishing, I was more patient with what I did, but I just stared at the water for a while and walked away, and there was another place that attracted me even more - the forest on the edge of the village, where birds were chirping, swallows, turtledoves, geese, sparrows, yellow warblers, etc. The good times don't last long, the mischievous children dare to climb the trees to destroy the birds' nests, or they will beat the birds with slingshots, the adults can't control it, they often scold their voices, and sometimes they are sitting in the house, and they may hear the sound of the roof whirring, because when the stones fall from a high place, they will smash the tiles, and when it rains, the rain will not flow from the roof along the neat tiles to the eaves, and if necessary, a small bucket must be placed in the house. Children don't care about these when they shoot birds, and adults may scold their own children.

It is the nature of children, and childhood in the countryside is not boring. Toys can be played anywhere, or folding a paper airplane, or breaking off a branch from a hillside, or even pulling a piece of mud off the ground, it will make us excited.

For example, if you know that most of the food we eat every day is catalyzed by chemicals, for example, if you look at it with a microscope, you will see that there are many bacteria and other pathogenic microorganisms around us, for example, you know that the earth is a planet, orbiting in its own orbit, and it is possible to collide with other planet......s. We haven't thought about it, and no one has taught us these things, it's completely a good situation, although we don't know the phrase "Tianxingjian, a gentleman strives for self-improvement". History is impossible to be exhaustive, many heroes will be buried, and the cultural relics for reference will also be destroyed due to continuous wars. I realized the horror and effect of time, which propelled the rings of history forward mightily.

Whenever I hear the adults talk about history and the change of dynasties, I always doubt whether it is true or false, if there is no real building, if it is not for me to remember where I came from, what about my parents, grandparents?...... I really don't know if some people made it up, just like when I first knew about nature, I saw a newborn baby, and I learned that everything has its own history. I often wonder what it was like when I was a child? Indeed, parents find it fun to have a child, despite the care and hardship. But even the child's crying brought endless joy to the young couple, and this happiness was instantaneous, and the parents had to wait for so long in the days that followed. And I can crawl on the ground, I can make a sound, I can wave, and I can show all kinds of expressions on my face, and at that time the young parents must be the happiest and happiest moment, and there is no need to think about the children that may cause them a lot of troubles in the future. If I have the opportunity, I must listen to my mother tell me the story of my childhood, otherwise, I will think that my life should start from the time I am sensible, I used to live in the memories of others, and the years of ignorance were naïve and curious, and the love of my parents was very deep and subtle, and it was inevitable that I would not be a little unnatural when I spoke.

The houses in the village are all adobe tiles, and the better ones can be put together with a few bricks. My home is okay, like a courtyard house in the north, the main room has a living room in the middle, the left one is the bedroom, the right room stores some living materials, and there are two wings on the left and right sides of the main house, which are used as kitchens and others. The floor of the living room is paved with bricks, and in the corner of one of the wings is some furniture, which I have touched and used at a young age. Two steps into the doorway there was a large cement trough with two cows tied to it, and it was common to see my father busy feeding the cows. When my father got married and separated, the family was relatively wealthy, and the relaxed environment continued until the end of my childhood.

The people of the village have lived under this world for generations, working with the crops all year round, and rarely going far away. For example, when I went to the county seat and came back, I had the joy of just coming back from the big city, and I didn't know that our county town was still a very backward small town, and the city was graded. What do they know when they lived in the era when they were closest to Chairman Mao, and all of them had simple faces? Speaking of the word "Beijing," it is still as if the word "emperor" was mentioned to the people of ancient times. My parents watched us go out of the countryside, because it was very hard and tiring to grow crops, and we couldn't even eat enough in the event of a natural disaster. The village is in the interior of China, and it is far from the city. It has been a few years since the land was divided, and the adults are still very happy, and the grandparents are happy to engage in socialist production. At this time, some festive events happened in the country, but the wind of civilization has not blown into this village for a long time, and people have not tasted the sweetness brought by reform and opening up. A small number of people read the "People's Daily" from the village committee room, and it is also a magnificent thing for someone to use newspapers to paste the walls in their homes. There is a landscape painting on the wall of the neighbor's house, and the age printed below is already a long time, and a few years later I learned that it is a picture of Huangshan Mountain in Anhui Province, and others will definitely not be able to tell.

This small village is inhabited by all kinds of people, who are constantly working, rarely thinking, if someone hears a new word, they want to find a suitable occasion to show off, especially in a crowded place, if it is said to one person, they are afraid that others will steal it. I'm very respectful to the adults. When I was disgusted with some people, I was also attracted by a few old religious people, who walked to the mountains several times a year to worship. There are some temple fairs, my mother also goes every year, sometimes she also takes me, she always kills a chicken and prays with offerings, and pious and serious vows make wishes, and that wish is nothing more than peace and prosperity for future generations, yes, hope is in me. In the years that followed, when I recalled this scene, I knew that I was not only alone, if I was just safe and smiling, then it would not be difficult for me to do it, but after I had an understanding of the faith, I had to think about my own destiny, and this problem has not been able to let go of in my heart.

There are three adobe houses in the east of the village, where two men live, Yan Sen, who is in his early forties, and his son Fuxiang, Yan Sen's wife died early, he is quite old, and he is an old child. Every day before dawn, we children would go to the primary school at the edge of the village, and Yan Sen would also wander around the village, and the children would call him by his name with the adults. Yan Sen is a diligent man, rarely idle, when he carries a hoe to work in the field, he often pulls his throat and hums a few times while doing it. In addition to the fields he was allocated, he also opened up a few small pieces of wasteland, and enclosed them with stones, the small stone walls were originally neat and tidy, but they were always pulled into a pile or everywhere by some naughty children, and when he was angry, he would tear his throat and scold these little rabbits. Fuxiang is simple, uneducated, but very obedient, and not a burden. The two laborers also often help other people's families, so they are very popular, he is addicted to smoking and drinking, likes to use a large bowl, and often holds a dry tobacco pouch, and he also seems to be happy.

Yan Sen has a skill in killing pigs, and when it is time for the Chinese New Year, there are always several pigs tied in the yard, and there are many people around. I always remember that scene: on one side boiling water in the cauldron, on the other side several young and strong men lifted the pig to the flat door panel, two people pressed on the pig's head, the pig was still humming and screaming, Yan Sen's eyes were quick, and he slammed a knife on the pig's neck, and the owner put the bucket prepared in advance under it to receive the pig's blood, and as the blood flowed down, the pig began to scream hoarsely and became **, and then slowly stopped moving, and let out the last gasp. There are also some pigs when people think that they have completely lost their breath, and they also stretched out their hooves suddenly, "Yo, I still want to make two punches", I don't know who came out with such a sentence, and the onlookers burst into laughter. Then they were busy, and the women who helped went to the kitchen to stew the pig's blood they received for everyone to eat. The cauldron over there was still boiling water, and here the two pig's trotter shells were hooked off with an iron hook, and then a small hole was pierced with a knife, and a section of bamboo a few inches long was stuffed, and the air bucket was clamped and began to cheer up, and the pig's belly slowly bulged. The pig, which was originally very small, sixty or seventy pounds, looked like more than a hundred pounds after being inflated. One person lifts his ears, one person grabs his tail, and two people hold his four legs hard, and he can put this pig on the pot table, because it is not jumping and barking like it was just now. The old man of Yan Sen used a scoop to scoop up the boiling water in the pot and poured the pig, and after pouring it several times, he used a sharp scraper to shave the pig's hair, ......and after a few minutes, people presented a snow-white naked pig ...... in front of their eyes.

If any family in the village does red and white things, they also want to kill a pig, the family must be surrounded by people, almost all the people in the village have been there, three or four days to cook a big meal, need a large amount of firewood, at this time can use Yan Sen's son Fuxiang, because the firewood is cut by him in the mountains, in those important days, he also plays his own role. Some people were chattering about him being stupid, and I was once tricked into teasing him like other naughty children, but he just giggled, and then I grew up and realized more and more that hard work can cover everything. Every time he came back from carrying firewood, he didn't ask for credit, he was busy chopping firewood or scooping water, and when he was empty, he would go to play with children, and he would see that I was shy and didn't play tricks, and often stood with me. I really wanted to hear him tell me about the scene on the mountain, and asked him if the mountain was high, and he seemed to be tempting me, saying sure, I couldn't see the top of the mountain, and he raised a finger as he spoke, and I said you can bluff me, take me to see it next time.

He thought I was talking about playing, and I admitted that I was just curious, but after dinner I had been sullen at home, and I told my mother that I wanted to go to the mountains, but she didn't take it too seriously, and pretended to be angry and disagreed and scared me, saying how could a child who had always been quiet have such an idea. I had to say that I just had this thought, and said that if I didn't see me in the morning, I would know that I had gone up to the mountains to play. I didn't care about my mother's feelings, I just hoped that something would happen in the village.

A few days later, a family in the village wanted to entertain guests, and the host greeted Fuxiang and used firewood in two days. When I learned that he was going the next day, I ran out of the walls of their yard at night and listened to the voices prepared inside: feed the donkey well, make sure the cart is safe and secure. The next day, I also got up early and slipped out, running to the road he had to go out of the village, and the donkey cart came over, and it was Yan Sen who sent his son out of the village. When they looked at me with curiosity, I slipped into the donkey cart and begged to take me up the mountain, they laughed and laughed, not taking it seriously, thinking that I was playing tricks, but seeing that I was lying on the donkey cart and was very serious, they did not want to waste time, so they agreed to me, and Lao Yansen would explain to my parents.

This is the first time I have gone out of the house, and at noon I ate coarse rice in the middle of the mountain, and they are very simple, and they have been looking at me happily and feeling very easy to get along with. It was also my first ascent and it created awe in my heart, and I stood on the top of the mountain and looked around. The height was much higher than the hillside in our village, but I also knew that it was a drop in the ocean, and the mountains and terrain were not described in the geography textbooks I had read. The view here is wide, and I am more surprised, and I don't feel as thrilling as adults say about it.

In the evening, when I returned home in a donkey cart full of joy, the door was left for me, and my mother did not close her eyes, waiting to count me, and I was still smiling, and her reproach lasted for a long time, as if I had been greatly wronged, I was rightly confronted her, she was very angry, and she almost cried at that time, so that I did not dare to forget "as long as a shoe, raise you so big, you know that you are angry". It's a pity that I didn't understand at the time how worried my mother was because of my stubborn personality and how much she worried about me behind my back. I made her angry, and when she saw that I was being sexual, she would come and coax me in every possible way.

One summer afternoon, the sun was about to set, and I was still enjoying a nap during the summer vacation. My mother woke me up in a daze and asked me to go with her to pick mung beans in the field on the hillside. Seeing that I didn't seem to be interested, she said that I could cook at home, and she walked away with a basket after saying that. After hearing the sound of her pushing open the courtyard door and closing it, I stood up with a carp, I don't want to cook at home on such a hot day, let's go to the slope, there is still wind on it. But I didn't want to go out right away, because my mother was walking slowly, and she would definitely look down as she went up to make sure I wasn't there. When I guessed that she walked up, I went out, and I was thin and delicate, shaking my arms, trying to climb the big steps, listening to the whirring wind in my ears, constantly panting, as if I was racing on flat ground, in order to surprise my mother, and at this time there was a sense of accomplishment compared to winning the award. It seemed like in a matter of seconds, and I was at the top of the slope. When my mother walked to my field, I quietly quickened my pace behind her, and when I was not close enough, although she would be surprised to shout "Mom" a little louder now, I wanted to tiptoe up to her, but now she was about to say hello to the aunt in the field next to her, so naturally I turned my head to the side and saw me behind me.

"Yo, look at our baby, when I came up just now, I didn't see him, he was really like a rabbit. ”

The aunt jokingly said next to her: "The child has to go to school well, let's not do this job." My giggle is also a sign of politeness. After my aunt left, my mother said that I should think about going to school, because there are fewer and fewer children in the village, and the time of going to school is hard and fulfilling, and the knowledge I have acquired at the beginning is very necessary, and if my heart is full of doubts, I will be tempted. My friends have left the school, and since Wanjie, I am the only one left. Every time I come to work in the fields, those uncles and aunts will say such things, these simple words, in my opinion, maybe they really can't say anything else, I can't tell how many are smart people, some people will only ask me when I start school. My mother must have liked to hear it, she knew that others were complimenting her son, and it was only when my mother and I started to put down the basket to pick mung beans that I really stopped and realized that I was already sweating profusely, but the breeze was very cool. Then I didn't do much for my mother, I had to walk back and forth several times to pick beans, I only sat down from this end to that end, leaving my mother busy alone, I looked at the distant scenery and thought, the sky in the countryside has always been so clear, the red sun is in the distant sky, the clear blue sky and white clouds, there are no green mountains and beautiful waters, there is no fertile land, far away from the town, and there are few wars in history burned here. The villagers are more afraid of the destiny of heaven, and have experienced great drought and flooding, there is a puddle at the edge of the village that has dried up several times and overflowed, soil erosion is serious, and the water area is decreasing year by year. When the rainstorm came, the sloping fields were constantly washed, and an undulating road strung our village together, and another white ribbon was a dam, which was cleverly connected to the big pit at the head of the village, which was no small project at the time. After each flood, the big trees on the shore were also hung with the stems and vines of the crops, and there were some broken sacks, which were not blown up by the wind, the water level was really so high at that time, and the small bridges were submerged or washed across, although some of the stones were about the size of my body, fewer and fewer farmers dared to live in low-lying places, and in the hot summer, people loved and hated the torrential rain, and if an orchard was washed away, the things floating on the water were more abundant and .......

It was from that afternoon that I became fascinated by the hillside, and my mother was delighted, and she was often followed by her son. I was sensible at the time, and this event can be remembered by me, and I don't think my mother will forget it anytime soon. But I learned so little about the housework with my mother. At one point, my mother said she didn't believe that three house-sized stacks of wheat straw were dragged home by herself, and I knew that she had done much more than that, but she never thought about it.

I have the impression that I always have to go to my grandmother's house several times a month, but fortunately the road is not far, I feel that the village is older, and there are many times of going back and forth, and I often want to close my eyes and try to walk a few steps to turn around, and slowly understand on the way. There is a temple of Guandi on the side of the road has existed for many years, once when my mother took me, she led me in and looked at me, and then I often walked in alone and knelt down to say a few words, and poured out my love and hate when I was a child, so that I remembered many small feelings at that time. My grandmother's steps became more and more faltering, and I often tugged at the hem of her clothes, and I liked her to tell me some things about my mother's childhood, and I went home to check with my mother one by one. This is one of the few naughty people who remembers so many of my grandmother's smiles. There was a little girl named Tingting on the edge of this village, and although the scene at first sight was very accidental, I remembered her girlhood face clearly. Then I passed by her house, and I always looked into her yard, and I would be annoyed when the door was closed, and sometimes I would circle around the smallest circle, including her house, just to see the small figure again. I remember very clearly, there is a well under the stone bridge on this road, and the villagers often go to fetch water, once my mother pulled me and talked to a woman, and my mother asked me to call it, I looked shyly, she and Tingting looked really similar, and I also heard them say that the two children were only a few days apart.

I always thought that if a little girl had passed by my door many times, I would have noticed it. I regret it for a while, even if I broke into her house, it was a naughty child, and it would not bring serious consequences, at most I made up a lie, but I had no talent for this, and the same is true for my future life, so to speak, I began to endure the bitterness of love sweetness from this moment. But I also know that love can't be so easy, if it is boldly said from the mouth of a child, there must be no adult who listens carefully, and it makes no sense at all. Frequent visits to my grandmother's house seem to have a cycle, and once the interval was too long, and I did a stupid thing once.

On that snowy night in winter, I inexplicably remembered Tingting, and in a hurry, I said a brief hello to my mother and went out, I wanted to climb over a hillside and take that shortcut. So on this snow-covered winter night, a reckless teenager appeared. I may have reached the top of the slope before I calmly thought about what I was doing, I heard that there are often rabbits in this desolate place, and I also know that it can be called idle people who have set all kinds of traps here in order to eat rabbit meat, I was frightened, I quickly turned around and went home, and when I fell downhill, and rolled more than two meters away, I was shocked into a cold sweat, if I fell under the bridge may be killed. But I didn't get up right away, and lay down and felt the snowflakes falling, and there was the sound of rushing water under the stone bridge not far away, until I felt cold with water in my neck, and I quickly got up and ran home.

When I came back, my mother had already fallen asleep, and I secretly opened the door and entered the house, and my mother coughed a few times, "Oh!" I replied softly, my mother must be worried about me, and then my mother complained to me a few words, and my heart seemed to be more steady, how cruel I hurt her again, because of my bad temper, I only knew that I might not be able to sleep. Putting aside this unfilial piety, I learned my feelings at that time a few years later, and remembered the words of a carefree person in ancient times, "I went on the basis of interest, and I came back when the interest was exhausted, so why did I have to meet that person?"

The next day my mother asked me where I was playing, if I was sick, what was the child thinking, "Yes, what can a child be thinking about?" and I asked, "Do you still have food to eat at home?" and I will go to the market with you tomorrow.

In the classroom of the primary school, I used to climb up the window and get into it mischievously in the absence of the teacher, and I was rarely noticed by the teacher. I may be verifying the burglary I just discovered: as long as the head can get out, then the body can go out sideways, and if you are afraid that the steel bar will hurt your ears, you can help pull your hands over your ears. I still dare to stand on the table and scream loudly, and when I recall that scene later, I wonder if I hummed a tune. At that time, my sensitive personality was more suitable for being a small spy, but no one told me this, and no one else knew about it. Despite this, I was still a shy kid in the eyes of the teacher, which shows how mischievous our little ghosts were back then. At home, my mother said that I was a little mouse, and she would sometimes hide the rare melon seeds and candies, and I would always look for them, and there would always be a harvest, and I also said that if I didn't find it, the fruit would probably spoil and rot, and my mother would sigh, so I persuaded her to change her lifestyle and think on the bright side.

For a period of time when I was at the end of elementary school, I used to move a stool and sit at the door of the main house, looking at the stone courtyard wall outside. Having an old-fashioned radio was the richest part of my childhood. This mysterious little box opened up the outside world for me, there are so many people, so many languages, and so complex societies in distant places, but following the laws of nature, everyone is a lifetime. There are news, cross talk, listening to novels, listening to advertisements, and there are many gonzo stories coming from the air, but my favorite thing is music, the first time I heard that beautiful sound, I fell in love with it, this feeling I can't share with others, during this period I was estranged from many friends.

A common saying among the villagers is that "three years old sees the old", and primary school students who want to go to university in a distant country have to go through a middle school in the middle. Parents will always teach their children this, "People are poor and nothing, but don't steal and rob, illegal things must not be done", as for getting ahead, becoming famous, and returning to their hometowns, hehe, even if these people know these words, they will laugh, "how can there be that life!". My father was a bit more enlightened, and he encouraged me to go to school, probably with the initial desire to grow up to be able to support myself. Although I have doubts, but I have no opinion, I am not a smart child in the village, maybe it is the arrangement of fate, maybe only through school can solve some problems. In this way, I went to a small town far away from home to attend middle school, which was the first time I lived away from home, and I went back once every six months on average.

Hundreds of students from the village are concentrated in the county town, no wonder there are so many classrooms, and each classroom has twice the standard number of people, unable to straighten their legs and bend their waists a little more, I didn't expect this to be a hard aspect of going to school. I sat at the back of the classroom, depressed, and others might have company, because they were already whispering, probably talking about the big scene.

In the classroom, we usually have high stacks of books in front of the desk, and the teacher only sees black heads on the podium at most, and half of the students are short-sighted, they all have their heads down, although they wear glasses, but they still can't change that bad habit. On the surface, everyone seems to be concentrating on reviewing their homework, but when the test results come out, they are far from the same. Students with low scores are not intellectually bad, and they may win at some stage in the future, both materially and spiritually. Self-study classes are sometimes reading aloud time, and I don't like the noise, usually boring flipping through the books. Once I heard the two classmates in the back read for a while, they actually started singing, you and I still do a discussion! I also itched in my heart, because I also heard and sang, at that time, sadness is easy to become a classic, a little big man began to learn to be sad, and even roared heartbreakingly, this is when he is happy, he imitates with his heart, imposes his sorrow, and at this time can remember the song will be listened to again and again. If you encounter a quiet class, those naughty and mischievous classmates take advantage of the teacher's absence to whisper, pass notes, talk about so-and-so classmates, and some silent classmates are reading extracurricular books, mostly martial arts, romance, science fiction and the like, they live a very fulfilling life, they will use time, and they have read tens of thousands of words in half a day.

On the sports field, I am also relatively timid, short in stature, have low self-esteem, lack a kind of willpower, and mistakenly believe that I am not suitable for any sport. I know a lot of projects, and I know the rules, but I don't like it, more often than not, I see the progress of others, applaud and cheer for them. Not outstanding, I also desire the friendship of female classmates. I also know that life will be like this in the future, and it will be difficult to date those girls. During the period of youth and ignorance, there is a good impression between male and female classmates, and I see it as a transition to love. On the one hand, I stayed away from girls, and on the other hand, I comforted myself with the spirit of Ah Q, they had already talked about how a certain female classmate had become, but in my opinion she was still a little girl! It was still early to fall in love, and of course I knew that courage was one thing, and ability was one thing. Middle school students are a special group of people, and they tend to go to extremes when they know something, thinking that they have grown up, young and vigorous, and their temper is slowly revealed, and they are looking for trouble for this! If I hadn't seen a few scenes of them fighting with my own eyes, I really couldn't believe it, and I heard that some of the reasons were that they were fighting for girlfriends and were angry. Once, two classmates were expelled from the school for a bad situation, and I felt sorry for them, and I also felt very pitiful, and I wanted to go for a bang.

On my left, across the aisle, there was a nasty guy there, because of his good grades, he often went to get close to some girls, such as asking people a few difficult questions, and he had already read the answers. Some girls have a gentle personality and don't talk much, and they have already shown disgust, but he is not interested. He may be more suitable to be the host of a boring radio program, maybe it is a good idea, maybe it is clever and eloquent, if he keeps it like this, his future livelihood will definitely have something to do with his mouth, but he is not all good, and I have a few classmates who like to flatter, if his cousin is from the same village as a certain classmate, then he will be "old watch, old watch" to that classmate in the future I don't want to make this kind of friend, I always feel that the more I say, the less I do.

Sitting in front of me is Wang Zhan, short haired, who usually likes to read some Carnegie, Hill and other books, saying that he wants to learn some ways to succeed. I have observed him several times, and every day he goes to eat alone, washes the lunch box quickly, and then goes into the classroom. He looks mature on the surface, but when he speaks, he looks like a child. During the self-study class, if he was bored, he would turn around and gossip with me, holding a textbook, so that the teacher would mistakenly think that we were discussing problems. Once he said that he couldn't get used to looking at a classmate, "That classmate, almost everything was bought by the family, what stationery, water cups, socks, all my mother bought for him." He also talked about himself, saying that he was a self-reliant person, I learned that his family was quite rich, but he didn't like to show off, he started to do a lot of things since he was a child, and during the Spring Festival this year, he also made a lot of rock sugar gourds to sell. What's more, he actually likes music, and he is shyer than me in this regard, saying that I am the first person to listen to him sing. The two of us went to buy cassette tapes together, listened to songs together, enjoyed music together, nodded to the rhythm, tapped our fingers on the table, and felt at ease. He likes to ask me to copy a few lyrics into a notebook, and I usually memorize them and write them down silently, and it feels so good, and some of the lyrics seem to be writing about myself. Those subtle words made me more silent, and when I heard a good song, it was like I had made a friend, and I couldn't have been closer than this friend, and I had a heart-to-heart connection with the singer when I listened to it. I thought that I like water, and the music brought me like a clear spring, and it felt no less than the love I longed for happened to me, which was wonderful. Listening to the melodious rhythm created by the musicians is like bathing in the beautiful and silent nature, as if there is a force that pushes me into harmony. As I grew up, I just liked to listen to music, but I didn't know how to know music, and I didn't know what kind of music I was passionate about. Musicians are destined to endure loneliness, but at the same time they are enjoying the process, first of all, they will be moved by the music they create, and at the same time they will be attached to more people, it is really not easy, if there is a real genius, I have no doubt that the artist is a genius.

Few people can think of going to middle school to go to college, for a good job and a good life. Only the teacher has taught us like this, but there are so many people, uneven, he can't take care of everyone after all, I haven't spoken to the teacher alone, my grades are above average, my motivation is not high, and I have no quarrel with the world. I always found a reason in my mind to excuse myself: "There must be a ranking!" The cruel ranking battle, but the teacher attaches so much importance to it, because there is also a comparison between different classes. In fact, out of all the courses, there was one that lowered my ranking, even though I was trying hard and felt guilty about the teacher. It was only in the final stages of secondary school that I realized my responsibility. I had to think about my future, and I was secretly determined to make up for that backward subject, but after two weeks, I didn't like it, I often looked at the books in a daze, and the sound of singing in the video store passing by in my head was disturbed by some string rhythm, and every time I couldn't resist the temptation. I vaguely feel that I have understood some truths, but I have not put them into practical actions, and if I have learned this knowledge, can life really be as we wish?

In school, we learn knowledge and learn the spirit of role models, in fact, there are a few young people in the village who are my role models, but what I think of as their advantages has become less and less obvious later, I only know that they are adults, they have just gotten married, and they have begun to support their families. Although I also felt the changes of the times when I grew up, I was not as serious as they were at that time, and I don't know how he thought of me at that time. Getting married is not far away, the days pass in a hurry, and it will be the turn of our generation soon, in middle school, my friends have dropped out of school one after another, and my parents are worried about marriage. The person who has a lively personality is the person who talks to himself in the environment of working in other places, and after getting acquainted, he will be brought home to pick a suitable day to get married, and the parents will worry less and work less, and these children are considered to be capable. Some other children are silent, and their parents are anxious, so they ask someone to be a matchmaker, and most of them choose nearby villages, and they all have prosperous days. This is almost the same as the situation in my hometown that I realized when I was a child, and when the villagers were idle-----, they would often come to the conclusion that whoever had established a relationship with whom, and which two distant relatives had been one family, "Yes! This world is too small, and it may be a relative to sit down and talk." "Whenever I hear these words, I always feel that there is a silent language in my heart, but I can't say it.

Only I persevered to the end, and my family was not reconciled, and no matter what, I had to go to college, which was perhaps a vanity to earn honor. I wanted to leave home, go to a strange place, and get to know myself again. At this time, the legendary stories I read also gave me some courage, when did those mythological stories start to be legends? I also imagined what the author's inspiration was when he created, whether it was a fantasy or a dream, but it was always inseparable from the slightest inspiration given by real life, and now my life will also begin to render dreamy colors, and I feel that I am almost ready for my life in middle school.

In school, children from wealthy families wear casual clothes and sports brands, and children in rural areas wear leather shoes and suits in their teens, pretending to be mature, as if they have suddenly crossed their youth.

In the end, I didn't get into the school in that big city, but chose an obscure school in the west, where school was like a formality, and I didn't know anything about the road ahead. When I went to school for the final hand, the head teacher said that I was very introverted and wanted me to change my personality. I said that I have fewer friends and am a little depressed, and I also have one or two friends who can talk about everything and have fun crazy. He said that I was going to the university and that I would be a skilled worker in the future, which was quite suitable for my personality. He hopes that I can talk more in the future, and don't hold anything in my heart. When I said those few words, my face was hot, was this a guide to my life?

Before going to Guizhou to study at university, I went to my grandmother's house, my cousin also dropped out of school for two years, he experienced a blind date, I was curious, he told me about yesterday's blind date.

"The woman's appearance is pale, and my grandmother urged me to meet her, and I was quite happy, and people are still like this, taking white as beautiful. We made an appointment to be on the side of the road at the top of the mountain. When I arrived, the girl was already waiting, leaning on a motorcycle, quite chic. She is more mature, not a small face, and her hair is fluffy and her figure is strong, but the photos I saw on the Internet are small and exquisite. The sky was falling in a light rain, and the girl took the initiative to drive him to a nearby town, and I didn't have the courage to hold her from behind, so I just pressed my face and body forward until I touched my hair and smelled it. Soon I was in town, and I felt as happy as I used to ride the cable car while hiking. I wondered if I could drive this woman, and when I got into the room, she told me to watch TV and said she was going to cook me some food. I didn't refuse, and I was willing to be a little brother. Simply cooked some noodles, very light, I was indeed hungry, but I didn't have the courage to say anything, she was so good, she had been giving for half a day, after eating, she saw that I didn't speak, and finally confessed to me, she said that she had just divorced herself, and had a short marriage, I asked her what was going on, she said that the man was too naïve, too obedient to the family, I muttered, may also show my attitude. She seemed to see through me, saying that she might only have to find another one to remarry. I like her, but she's in a hurry to get married, and I can't make up my mind, and I can't get a wedding bride price. I'm afraid that the people in the village will gossip, there is a young couple in the village who are arguing for divorce, the man's family means, he has not had a child after three years of marriage, saying that it is a woman's problem, I like him, I don't have her contact information, but I think she will also dislike me for being cowardly. ”

"My dad is not in good health, my house is still leaking, there are two wings that have not been occupied, and they are about to collapse, so we asked a neighbor to saw a useless tree and used wood to cover the wall. My father wants to live in the village, but he can't take care of himself, and he wants me to marry a rural daughter-in-law, I also want to learn knowledge, go to school with you, but I can't afford to pay the tuition at home, my father trained me to do housework, taught me to drive a tractor, and the trees I planted in the yard, he couldn't support them, often the soil cracks and the leaves were yellow, he didn't have a sense of time, he wouldn't water the trees in advance, he didn't have the patience, and more often waited for the rain to fall from the sky.

Even if you remarry, you have to come up with a bride price, but my family can't take it, I hate this family, I want to go to Beijing, the family can't live, I took my father to a construction site, I went to do terrazzo, at the beginning it was mainly to contribute, my father did simple things, switching power supplies, moving bricks and pushing cement, running errands and sending tools and the like, if there is something to call him to do it, most of the time is idle, he can't do a little technical work, and he also sends a minimum living expenses.

"You should go and say goodbye to your uncle, he doesn't want to go, I'll go with him. Maybe the father and son in the world are like this, he talks and laughs in front of my father, and I will talk a few words with my uncle.

"This is a construction site for a high-rise building, and at least three floors have to be dug underground. My uncle didn't go to work on the construction site for two days because he was afraid that he would come and make a splash. I looked around the room at the rudimentary furnishings. The quilt on the bed was tied with rope. Under the bed, there were several broken bottles piled up.

"You can't cook noodles every day, cook vegetables and eat them, you have to eat some oil. What's the use of picking up all that garbage on the road? You can go to the market to buy vegetables and learn to cook. Now it's cold, go buy a quilt, you tie the quilt with a rope to be strong, it's not easy in the city, it's really not too old now, you have to move more. I originally wanted to take you to see the outside world this time, but I think about it or wait for the ability in the future, you don't have to be lazy now, it's not yet the time when you can't move in your sixties and seventies, those uncles and uncles are about the same as you, and some are older than you, don't they all go out to find work to do, you also have to work for yourself, we are poor, and we have to be alone. Others can still send some money to the family, my grandmother is so old, and she is still at my aunt's house, I don't know what you think in your heart. ”

As I was leaving, I asked my cousin if what he had just said was excessive.

"The son taught Lao Tzu a lesson, which is a bit unfilial, but it is rare for a father to do this part. I wish he had lost his temper and not be like this, but he just didn't say a word, or he said he was the same.

My friends have been much more honest after getting married, and then they have their children, and this time I rarely see them in a leisurely state when I go home. A few of them work outside the home, leaving their children at home, and their grandparents are happy to take care of them. One of them happened to be at home and invited me to have two drinks to catch up. I also know that this is the last trace of innocence and happiness that remains, and that the teenagers of the past are no longer there. When I went out, my mother told me not to drink, but I was no longer a child. While drinking, we talked about when we were young, and I could easily hear what they were trying to say, and I wanted to forget that I had a wife and children now. His wife who got married soon ago is also very sensible, I didn't attend their wedding, and I only saw his wedding photos now, the bride in reality is much better looking than in the photo, I said it without concealment, and described her beauty, this is a woman likes to listen to words, everyone is happy, this atmosphere quickly swallowed a little sour in my heart. I said a lot that night, but it had nothing to do with drinking, he said I was going to school, I was going to drink less, and I thought to myself, what does this have to do with drinking? I have my own joys and sorrows, I just think that good training in alcohol has something to do with guts. The next day my mother said that I was very drunk and nagging, and I was a little bored and didn't want to communicate. Parents also have this kind of contradiction, although I want to go to a distant place to study, it is a happy event, but there is no other family to hold their grandchildren happy, the ultimate goal is that I can get married and start a family, and going to school is a gamble on the future, I thought that feelings are only suitable for burying in my heart.